A/N - Hey! Thanks so much for the reviews on the last chapter. They were great and they were the most this story has recieved so far! So please keep it up!

Thanks: BrOoKe DaViS23, Squealing Lit. Fan, othfan326, erikax3, CheerandBrood323, hoeoverbros, Brooke D., Mosie1213, bd-ls-islove, Princesakarlita411, brucas3, TeamxxBrucasxx, Team Davis-Scott, onetreefan, chebelle, BRUCAS EQUALS LOVE, BDavis427, TreeHillDreams, Sophia-Chad, and brucas333.

Enjoy and leave a review please! (It's my birthday today so be sure to leave lots and lots of great reviews!!)

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Searching For What We Lost

Chapter 4 -

--Two Months Earlier--

The computer screen's light illuminated the darkened house late at night.

Brooke's eyes scanned the screen once again.

A ticket for a flight to California.

That was what she needed.

An escape. An escape from all the pain she had dealt with recently. And leaving town for a little bit seemed to be the perfect solution to her problem.

She leaned back in the chair, contentedly listening to Lucas's soft snores from the next room over. She knew that it wasn't just she that was this way; Lucas had been dealing with the same pain she had been. But for some reason, she didn't know how to deal with that pain as he had.

Lucas asked her, begged her even, to open up. To talk. He said they should talk about it, otherwise they wouldn't get anywhere. He was right about one thing; she wasn't getting anywhere.

She'd spend all hours of the day sitting at home -mostly in bed- and would only get up when Lucas was asleep, in hopes of avoiding him. And maybe he was right, maybe she was this way because they weren't talking...But it was too hard for Brooke to talk about anything lately. Because everything would remind her of him.

Deciding that this was what she wanted, Brooke picked up the phone and her fingers numbly dialed a number. It was late in Tree Hill, but with the time difference, it was more than likely that the other person on the other end of the line would still be up.

Brooke nervously bit her lip as the phone rang and rang. When finally, to her relief, someone picked up.

"Hello?"

"Peyton...it's me, Brooke."

--Present Time--

"Uncle Lucas!" Jamie ran into the room to find his mother talking with Lucas. "You came back! Do you wanna see me and daddy play?"

"Uh, Jamie, your Uncle Lucas is sorta busy right now. Why don't you and daddy go and practice?" Haley bent down to her son's level and spoke.

"But I wanted Uncle Luke to watch us."

"Hey, buddy, I'll come watch you later, alright? Me and your mommy just have to talk about a few things." Lucas tried to speak as soft as he could and tried his best not to show his young nephew that he was upset.

"Okay." Jamie mumbled and walked out of the room. Once he left, Lucas's face turned back into a worried state and all his stress once again returned.

What was he going to do?

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Her eyes, sore and tired from all the crying she had done, opened. At first she was confused, and didn't remember where she was.

But then it dawned on her.

She had come back home.

Two months of living in California with Peyton and now she was back.

She soon realized the house was the same as she left it. Cold. The whole atmosphere was cold. And un-welcoming. And that was how it was after that terrible tragedy.

Lucas had changed, though, unlike the house. Before, he was understanding and as frustrating as it was, he gave her the space and time that she needed to cope. Now he wasn't so understanding and it seemed to her, he could care less about what she did to cope with what happened.

She had made her choice of what to do, and that was leaving. He didn't want to be apart of that.

She pulled her knees up to her chin, and wrapped her arms around them. Maybe coming home wasn't the best idea.

"Brooke...Brooke, what's going on?" Lucas came into the waiting room disheveled and spotted the brunette out almost immediately.

He had been at work when he recieved the call from Brooke. She had been hysterical crying, and didn't go into too much detail, so it was pretty hard to understand what was going on. He left his office as quick as he could, and rushed to the hospital, running every red light.

Brooke got up from her seat, and went into a fresh round of hysterics.

"I don't know." She cried and buried her face into Lucas's chest. "I was right there, I was right inside. And then...I don't know what happened. He was playing basketball...and it's all my fault. And now they're not telling me anything..."

Her eyes snapped open and just like that, the memory was gone. The ongoing nightmare that she had been reliving everytime she closed her eyes disappeared.

It was times like those she remembered why she had left in the first place. It was too much to handle and she needed a cooling off period. And if she hadn't left, things would probably be much worse than they were now...and they were still pretty bad now.

The night it all happened, she lived in denial. She pretended nothing happened, and even imagined that her son was just staying over a friend's house that night. They were going to watch movies and play video games, and then he'd come back the next day and tell her all about it.

Except he never came back home.

And that's when it starting sinking in.

He was never going to be coming back home.

And soon enough, she was having those memories; in her sleep, and even during the daytime when she was spacing out. And she couldn't talk to Lucas about that because then he'd probably think she was some crazy person and send her off to a looney bin because she was having those weird dreams. And then it just made sense to ignore Lucas completely at that stage in the game. There was no point of talking to him about it because they'd both just get upset again. And it wasn't like that would even fix anything.

Nothing was going to fix it.

It was all screwed up. And Brooke would be the first person to admit that.

And that's when she decided to pack her bags and jump on a plane to visit her old friend. Just like that.

The door from downstairs opened and closed abruptly shaking Brooke out of her thoughts.

He had come back.

She firmly pulled the bed comforter closer around her body and waited, listening as the steps grew closer and closer.

She looked away from the doorway when he finally appeared in it.

After talking to Haley, he realized what he needed to do, and also what he wanted to do.

And that was to have a long conversation with his wife about everything; a conversation that was long overdue.

"I'm sorry." He spoke, breaking the silence. His voice was much kinder than it had been earlier, and this caused her to look up.

"For what?" Her voice cracked. "You didn't do anything...I did."

"Yeah. But I shouldn't have pressured you so much...I should've given you more time."

"That wouldn't have helped, Lucas. And you know that." She shook her head doubtfully.

"So...what now?" He didn't know what else to say. No word or sentence would be able to make this go away.

"I think...I think I need to leave again."

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A/N - Mean cliffhanger?? I know...

Is Brooke really gonna leave again?? Hmm...Idk, leave a review and maybe you'll find out sooner ;)

And like I said before, it's my 14th b-day today so you know what would make awesome presents?? Your reviews!!

Thanks!!

–Melissa