Sage was up far before everyone else, seated at one of the long tables in the mess hall, simply sitting in the soft moonlight glow that streamed in through a small window that lined the top of the back wall of the larger chamber.
In truth, she just hadn't gone back to bed at all.
For most of the night, she simply remained on Rey's bed, the girl's head in her lap for a long while until she had rolled over, her features serene and free of all the anxiety and fear she'd been feeling beforehand when her dreams were plagued with shadows and other horrors.
Still, the young Knight remained, head rested back against the wall, her eyes half idled as she stared blankly at her legs and bare feet, her mind far away from Ahch-To. And it was not with her family on Beheboth, either.
It had been awhile since she had experienced emotions that were entirely her own, so, it was difficult to brush away the painful pang in her chest.
It wasn't him, she had tried to convince herself, hand clenching into a fist so that her nails dug into her palm. He is no more. Only the Sith shell remains.
For awhile, it worked. She had been able to see him for the beast that he was, makeshift lightsaber crackling in the cold winter air and face covered by the horrific mask he so often wore. Dressed in his clothes as dark as ink; a shadow in the night preying upon the innocent.
She had expected him to fight when he saw her, standing there, out in the cold, clothed as a Jedi, between him and the one he had been hunting. Instead, he had done the opposite.
His saber had fallen from his hand and sunk into the powder beneath their feet. He had raised his head and looked at her then, the wide, impenetrable blackness of his visor lingering on her. And then her resolve broke and she couldn't help it, couldn't help herself for she was far too weak.
Despite all that had happened, in her mind she could see the dark browns of his eyes, the toothy, crooked grin on his lips. Hear his slightly odd but no less warm laugh.
She could see Ben.
And then he had reached out to her. He didn't need to speak, didn't need to say anything to her but she could feel the tightening in his chest, the mirror to the same feeling simmering in her own heart.
But then, her old lightsaber had appeared in her palm seemingly out of nowhere and before she could respond, it was igniting and its hiss brought her back and reminded her of everything. All the horrible things he'd done. How he was of the Darkness now.
A Sith.
And she was a Jedi.
It almost seemed genetic; the title of Sith Killer had been passed down through her family. It was defined in both her blood and her actions, for she'd had a few encounters with a number of Dark apprentices and followers over the years and well, she was still here. The Sith followers, however, were not.
She imagined Ren himself had earned himself a title after the massacre, one that was now fitting and wholly opposite of her own: Jedi Killer.
He's done a fine job. She sneered slightly in her mind, her head turning to peer at the door as she thought of her Master. We're all but wiped out now. Extinct. Turned to legend instead of fact.
Then, before she had allowed her emotions to get the best of her, she had pushed him back, shoved him into his own mind so that he could fester in his own subconscious.
After that, she'd blocked him out entirely and carefully searched Rey's mind for a bit after that, looking for the link that she suspected hooked the two of them together. However, her success was misplaced and without the other end of the link online and thrumming with energy, she could not find it in the recesses of her student's mind.
So, she had left the room, slipped away a short while after Rey had rolled over and buried her face in one of her pillows.
There was no appeal in trying to find sleep once more so Sage had instead walked down the corridor, passed both her room and her Master's, and had taken up residence in the mess hall. And now, she just sat.
For a couple of minutes, she'd debated on whether she truly wanted to perhaps go outside and try to meditate on the new, rather troublesome manner but in the end, a strange ache settled in her bones so she remained where she was at the long table. For reasons unknown, she had seated herself in the heavier, more immaculate chair placed at the head of the table instead of sitting in her typical place to the immediate right of it.
Time was completely beyond her mind as her glazed eyes stared unseeingly ahead at the pale, stone wall across the room.
It wasn't until much later, when the light of dawn finally began cresting over Ahch-To, that her Master was suddenly sitting down at the table in her own place, a ceramic mug in each hand, both filled with a steaming liquid. He placed one of them in front of her.
This had forced her to blink back to life and when she registered exactly who was joining her and for a moment, remembered her place. Evidently, however, the older man had sensed her sudden distress and while taking a sip of his warm drink, raised his free hand to stay her want to rise and move from his chair. With his blessing, she settled herself once more, leaning heavily on the old wood, causing it to creak.
For a long while, neither of them said anything.
Sage herself didn't know what to say, how to even begin. She knew she had to tell her the older Jedi sometime, to take his council as she had been taught to do whenever she needed guidance. However, she couldn't find it in herself to say anything and it didn't look as though Master Skywalker was going to do so anytime soon either.
So, they sat in companionable silence for a bit, her blue eyes watching as the steam lazily rolled off the sweetened, caramel-colored liquid inside.
It had been like this for years during their exile together, just the two of them to keep the other company. One would suspect that such circumstances would place the two participants at each other's throats but, not in this case. The two of them were Jedi after all, ever patient and never quick to temper. Always in harmony with each other and the Force.
It was an understatement to say that their Master-Padawan bond was strong after so many years alone. No, it was parsecs above that.
Even before the Tragedy, she had been one of his students that had been with him the longest, coming in second behind his own nephew by only a year. And still, she was with him.
Realizing that she had placed defenses around her own mind so as to not disturb her Master during his sleep, she slowly let them deteriorate, allowing her emotions to slowly leak out into the Force around them but the thoughts eliciting them still remained barricaded away.
"Your mind is cloudy this morning." He observed idly after taking another sip of his drink.
She could not deny him the truth, "Yes."
"Am I right to assume that such overcast is due to what I stumbled upon last night?" She sighed deeply before nodding her head, "Would you care to clarify the situation for me?"
Sage paused briefly, leaning forward slightly in her chair, "As you no doubt felt it, last night, Rey had a nightmare."
"It was not a typical nightmare, though, was it?" He asked her, setting his cup down entirely while looking over at her. "You felt it, didn't you? The Darkness?"
"Yes, it woke me up." She explained, eyes casting themselves down to stare into her lap.
Luke looked off down the long hall for a moment, "It would seem that Rey is fine now, though. Is resting peacefully enough, so it seems." He himself sighed before his hand rose and stroked over his bristly beard. "Did you find the source of the nightmare?"
"I suspect that someone has installed a mental link in her mind without her truly knowing, a justifiable source of the night terrors." Sage admitted slowly, her elbow resting on the arm of the chair and her chin resting in her palm. "Which, I suppose, also gives me reason to think that her connection to the Force is being tampered with. Blocked almost, by something... or someone."
His brow furrowed softly, "What do you mean?"
Sage opened her mouth to speak for a moment but she paused, unsure of how to word the thoughts lingering in her mind, "Yesterday... when we were training down on the southern island, I asked about her experiences with the Force and when she'd first discovered it. She told me, that, a couple weeks ago, she'd been kept as a prisoner on Starkiller Base, or I guess you could say, the First Order's completely unoriginal idea of a third Death Star."
The Jedi Master could not help it when his lips twitched up into a smile at her comment.
"Anyway, she told me that she was being interrogated because she had evidently saw the a missing section of a galactic map that led to Ahch-To and us. And then... her mind had been plucked and pulled at in hopes of finding the map information but she'd been able to resist and push back."
"Pulled at?" His brows rose in surprise, his face mirroring the shock Sage had felt when she'd first heard the new information.
"That's what I said."
Once his shock wore off, the older man's brows furrowed in concern, "So, she means to say that she was being interrogated by a Force-user?"
"It is not hard to figure out who it was doing the interrogating." She finally took the mug into her hand and blew some of the steam away before attempting to take a sip, which resulted in her wincing and jerking away from the rim as the liquid scalded her lips. She'd always done that, always burnt herself when drinking hot beverages. She was always too impatient to wait for it to properly cool.
Looking up at her Master, she found that he was frowning softly at the table top, his hand still absentmindedly rubbing his chin as he processed this new string of information. "This news is extremely troubling."
"I know," Sage sighed and mopped a hand over her face, "That's why I'm assuming there's a block of some sort, some kind of vice keeping her from fully accessing her powers. Old as she is, she should have developed some sort of abilities, subconsciously or not, by now."
He paused for a moment, "Did you have time to search her mind?"
"Not as deeply as I wished, too. The block is no doubt hidden well where he doesn't want us to find it." Allowing her eyes to raise, two pairs of blue irises held each other. "It shouldn't be a problem for me, though. I just need time and the proper opportunity."
"It needs to be soon, Sage," Luke warned her, his brow furrowing softly once more, "If he placed a block in her mind then there is a possibility he opened a mental link between the two of them, potentially putting our whereabouts at risk. That is your top priority."
"Yes, Master," She nodded her head sharply, "At the first chance I get, I'll find and sever the link and remove the block, if there is one."
"Good." He also bobbed his head and then pushed his chair back so that he could stand. "And as far as training goes, we will shy away from Force abilities for now until you can find the block. Focus more on teaching her about the Jedi Order and our past; teach her what the younglings would have learned as initiates. Until you can locate the block, build a defense around our location and stow it away where he can't find it."
"I already did so."
Walking towards the entrance to the mess hall, he paused when he realized his Padawan hadn't risen from her own seat. Bracing his hand on the door, he looked back over his shoulder at her and found that her eyes were already so distant with thought so soon after he'd left.
"Sage..." He sighed, raising a hand and raking it through his shaggy hair. She slowly lifted her eyes to look at him. "I will take Rey, today."
She sat forward in her seat, her brow furrowed softly in concern. "Master?"
"You're distracted." He explained, his blue eyes calmly holding her own pair. "This new development is troublesome, yes. But, you must remember your duty to your Padawan."
He watched as a sudden sadness entered her eyes and he could feel the burn of defeat low in her chest.
"You are still young, Sage. Still learning yourself." Master Luke reassured her gently but his face held a strange firmness in its features, "Take today to clear your mind. Go meditate and organize your thoughts. I will send Rey out when her lessons are over. By then, I hope that your mind will be focused once more."
She rose from her chair slowly, her head bowing slightly, "Yes, Master."
Rey let a yawn escape her lips as she raised her arms and arched her back in an effort to wake her muscles. For a moment her eyes burned as she stepped out into the bright sunlight, having been kept indoors in one of the lower levels of the temple all morning and most of the afternoon in a dome shaped room where Master Skywalker could project images and holograms onto the walls.
He had been lecturing on what had transpired in the past during the war between the Rebellion and the Empire nearly 30 years ago. It had been a daunting lesson but she'd picked up on it easily enough; it wasn't as if it was entirely different as to what was currently happening with the Rebellion and the First Order.
She had even been given a few books to read and she had stared at the small stack for a few, long minutes after she had been dismissed and had placed them on top of her dresser in her room. All of them were thick and Rey couldn't help but feel her cheeks burn when she considered the idea of how long she could keep her little secret to herself.
However, she'd brushed aside those thoughts for a moment and was now elated at the idea that she could get outside once more and take a break from having her new, school lessons to think about.
The Jedi Master had informed her that Sage was outside somewhere and was waiting for another session of training together. For a moment, Rey couldn't help but wonder why the blonde woman hadn't been present during her morning lessons and had instead been absent.
The two Jedi had mentioned that she was going to have two teachers and the fact that Sage was truly her Master; the one who was to primarily help guide her on the path set before her.
Something was calling to her just then, guiding her back around the side of the the dwelling and as she approached the cliff side, she was surprised to find a shorter more direct path that led down the mountain. It was steeper than the Jedi Steps but Rey would take severity over distance any day. She would rather suffer for a couple, intense minutes than have her stamina slowly worn down over the course of a day.
Still, she felt the tug in her chest and so she scrambled down the broken stone path, the curiosity in her mind getting the better of her. However, as she rounded another corner, she came to find that there seemed to be a small sandy beach below that the ocean waves lapped and washed at.
Continuing to travel downward, she stopped when she reached the bottom of the stairs where there was a final stone slab that acted as sort of a landing before the cliff side fell away. A pair of boots, a leather belt, an over shirt, and a familiar lightsaber had been discarded on the slab, no doubt to keep them dry when it came to the continuous assault of the ocean waves on the beach.
However, when Rey peered over the edge, she found that there were large fissures and cracks in the stone face, perfect for climbing up and down. So, after kicking off her own boots and rolling up her pant legs, she descended easily for a few minutes until her feet touched the damp sand.
Panicking for a moment as the water rushed towards her, the young scavenger couldn't stop herself from scrambling up the beach out of fear, the waves chasing after her the entire way. Halfway up the beach, she reached a point, however, where the water could no longer catch her and she stepped onto drier sand that now clung to the dampness on the bottoms of her feet.
Taking a seat on the soft ground, Rey couldn't help it when her fingers almost automatically sunk down into the coarse grains beneath her. And she was suddenly reminded of Jakku and the life she had left behind.
If she closed her eyes and just barely reached back into her own memories, she could still feel the blistering heat and the hot winds that scorched the planet's surface.
But, those sensory details were suddenly taken from her as the cool sea breeze blasted against her face as it rolled in with the waves, a few stray hairs tickling her face as they tossed about freely.
She opened her eyes once more and was met with the oceanic atmosphere of Ahch-To instead of the sight of the rust colored dunes that rolled for miles back on her home planet.
There was a loud crash suddenly as a particularly big waves crashed against one of the craggy outcroppings that was perpendicular to the small beach out in the deeper part of what Rey imagined was the shallows. The noise stole her attention from her thoughts and instead to the distant little island. It took her a moment but she soon realized that there was a human-shaped form atop it.
And it wasn't all that hard to guess that it was Sage out there.
She felt her brows raise nearly into her hairline when she realized that her Master wasn't in fact standing but it looked like she was doing a handstand, her back ram-rod straight and her entire body drenched from head to toe from the waves that continued to batter the stone as well as the young Knight residing atop it. A particularly large wave came crashing up over the stone, momentarily devouring the blonde woman but when the water trickled away and receded, Sage remained resolute in her form.
For a few minutes, all Rey did was watch from her own place on the beach, wondering how she was going to get the female's attention and if she should even try. There was some part of her that was always wary of the fact that the Jedi liked their solitude and silence, that they didn't like being disturbed. However, it was only a beat later that the other girl was easing herself out of her handstand so that she was upright once more.
It was almost instantaneous how her head turned and she looked to the beach.
And then, much to the brunette's surprise, Sage was walking over to the side of the craggy island before she suddenly leapt out into the air and dove off the shelf, falling the few feet through the air until she disappeared beneath the surface of the dark water.
Rey was a little concerned when, after a moment, her Master failed to resurface. Climbing to her feet, her eyes widened in fear and she took a few more steps towards the ever approaching waves but paused when a damp but nonetheless blonde head of hair rose from the depths of the sea as a drenched version of the Knight was able to stand on her own two feet once more and walk the rest of the way up to the shore, the waves continuing to press against her and force her forward with their sheer strength.
Stepping onto the damp shore, the ever reaching waves continued to lap at the heels of her bare feet as Sage approached her Padawan, remaining clothes and hair heavy with added moisture. Taking a two handfuls of the darkened strands into her palms, she attempted to squeeze some of the access water out so that some of it feel back down and seeped into the sand.
"How were your lessons?" Came the question when the Jedi was only a few feet away.
"Interesting... I guess." Rey admitted honestly while raising her hand to scratch nervously at the back of her neck.
"The subject matter?"
"Master Skywalker started with explaining the last galactic war between the Empire and the Rebel Alliance." She looked directly at Sage then, "Nothing's really changed has it."
The woman was quiet for a moment before she turned away and went to walk up the beach, something tugging on Rey's mind, compelling her to follow, "The names of the Alliances. The leaders. And the villains, perhaps... but, no..." She sighed through her nose, "Nothing's changed at all."
"Will it ever truly change?" The young Knight seemed to ponder this thought for a moment.
"In our lifetime, we can only hope so."
It was quiet between the two of them after that. Sage had simply clasped her hands behind her back and was taking her sweet time to walk along the shoreline, perfectly content with herself and how the strong winds ruffled both her damp hair and clothes, stealing some of the moisture harbored in them and slowly drying her off.
When they came once more to the cliffside from before, the older girl didn't even pause before she began to ascend the craggy surface. Rey followed behind her until they were both climbing steadily along the evident path of foot and handholds that had been worn into the stone.
"How did you sleep last night?"
The brunette looked up from where she'd been focused on her fingertips as they gripped onto the rocky surface. She considered the question for a moment before answering, "Pretty soundly after you stayed."
"Did you have anymore nightmares?"
Again, Rey paused when answering, her mouth opening and closing for a brief moment, "The same as before... but... different."
Sage just continued to climb, "How so?"
"Well, it was like all the other dreams where I'm running through the forest with Ren behind me... but..." It took her a moment as the images of the previous night's dream played through her mind. The dark shadow and the blood-red lightsaber. The stinging nip of the cold air. The suffocating feeling of being trapped and restrained by the Force. And... then... "You were there."
"Really?" Her Master's voice had a foreign lilt in it for a moment, one that caused Rey's eyes to narrow with suspicion. "Alright, then what happened?"
"All I remember is that you stood between me and him. And you had a blue lightsaber. Then, the dream ended and there wasn't another one after that."
"That's good to hear."
They continued to climb for a bit after that until they reached the top. Sage hauled herself up and over the edge of the cliff first with her Padawan soon to follow. The blonde offered a hand down in assistance to her student and Rey took it, allowing the older girl to help her over the side.
"Are we going to do more Force training today?" The scavenger asked as they bent down to retrieve their things.
"No," Was her quiet reply as she clipped the belt back around her waist and hung her lightsaber from it, "We're going to do some physical regimens down in the training room to help you get stronger. In the life of a Jedi, it's important to train your mind and connection to the Force as well as your body." Sage wordlessly picked up her boots and over shirt in her hand before she was beginning the meticulous climb back up to the dwelling.
Bare foot. Rey couldn't help but note quietly in her own mind while she too picked up her own boots and trailed after her Master.
"Master Luke and I have set up a schedule, or, at least, decided that we will very much be sharing your training. He will handle your schooling lessons including strategy and military tactics. I will handle your Force teachings as well as combat training and conditioning. However, we will both sit in on your lessons to observe your progress."
The brunette couldn't help herself when her curiosity started to get the best of her, "So... why weren't you at my lessons this morning?"
Sage didn't answer immediately, "My mind was clouded this morning, full of too many thoughts and emotions. Sometimes, when this happens, it is best to simply take a few hours to meditate on the idea to organize the chaos in ones mind."
"And you call what you were doing back there meditating?" Her eyebrows rose into her hairline as she pointed back towards the way they came.
"The physical strain helps my mind to focus on one thing, makes it easier to stem off from there and work on my other thoughts. The waves are a natural metronome." The young Knight explained, reaching up to brush some of her drying hair from her face, "They are a second, grounding idea once I am able to ignore the physical pains. So, yes, that was me meditating."
"Do you do that often?" Rey asked her, "Go out into the middle of the ocean and try to concentrate while nearly being toppled over by cold water?"
"I only do so when I have much on my mind."
Sage sat in her own room, awake that night.
After the four of them, Chewbacca had joined them for dinner, had eaten, Rey had declared that she was immediately going to retire for the night. The exhaustion in her body was evident as she leaned heavily on the long table, her eyes threatening to slip shut as she hazily gazed down at the purple protein porridge before her. She had already half-heartedly eaten three rolls of bread and a bowl full of strange green fruit that had tasted delightful.
Finally, her Master had given in and Sage dismissed her and with a breathy sigh of relief, Rey had thanked her and handed her plates to the old COO droid before stumbling off to her room with a Wookie yodel called after her, telling her goodnight.
Chewie had stayed with the two Jedi for awhile to simply sit and talk with them, good-naturedly asking Sage how her training was going and commenting on the fact of how much she had grown since the last time he had saw her.
She had only laughed at that and then he told her he was pleased to see that she had grown into a proper Jedi.
Sage had thanked him for his kind words and then she had asked him what he had been doing all these years. He had then began to tell them of all the crazy situations and disasters Han had gotten them into and how they'd gotten out of them.
During their time spent with the Wookie, the younger Knight had brushed against her Master's mind and found him oddly at ease, content to simply sit and converse with his old friend and companion. Even a few laughs were shared as they regaled each other with memories and adventures during the old galactic war, though, it wasn't anything Sage hadn't already heard from her own Master.
Eventually, Chewie took his leave, bidding them both a goodnight as he retreated into the depths of the dwelling so that he could return to the Falcon.
The two Jedi had remained after that.
Sage herself had began to feel the effects of a sleepless night, her own eyes growing heavy.
"Your mind is much more focused today." Master Luke had observed after a few moments of silence between them. She had raised her head to look at him, her own steely blue eyes slightly hazy, "Go to bed, Sage, and get some rest."
"I can't." She said honestly as she nonetheless rose from her seat. "I need to find the link and the block in Rey's mind."
"And how to you propose you'll do that?"
"Set a trap and simply wait for it to sprung." She idly stood there and ground the heel of her palm into her eye, showing her exhaustion. "Hold onto the source instead of pushing it out this time and use it to lead me directly to the roots."
"You sound so sure of your actions, Sage...?"
"I did meditate on it for most of the morning." He nodded his head in understanding as she spoke. "This was the best and least objectionable option that I could come up with."
"Very good." The Jedi Master waved her away in a gentle dismissal for her to retire to her quarters, "Good night, Sage. You have all my faith in your abilities."
"Thank you, Master. Goodnight."
So, she sat now, back against the stone wall in her room with her legs splayed out, pillows settled on either side of her. Her head was hung slightly, her eyes half idled with slumber and were growing heavier with each blink.
For a while, she simply tuned out all else and let the Force flow and swell around her, drawing energy from it so as to help keep herself awake. After a few minutes of doing so, she forced herself to sit up straighter and rested her head back on the wall.
She could feel the current hum contentedly inside and around her like a generator, providing the extra energy she needed.
Her skills in this department were rusty, for she had been able to sometimes go three or four days without sleeping when she was younger, using the Force to draw in excess energy that she could use when the need called for it. However, that was back when times were busy for the Jedi but now, both her and her Master had been dormant for so many years that sleeping every night had nearly become a necessity and a bad habit.
And then, just as she was allowing her eyes to close, she was thrust back into a state of awareness, her senses suddenly alert as a number of alarms and bells went off in her head.
Sure enough, he'd come back for more.
Lurching from her bed, the walls in her mind instantly expanded to block her own emotions as well as the flux coming from Rey as she walked down the hall.
Don't rush, she told herself, give him develop a false sense of security.
She opened the door with a quiet hiss and stepped into the room, bare feet once again silent on the stone flooring. Her Padawan was once more twisting and writhing on the bed, cheeks tear and sweat-soaked. Settling herself onto the bed like she had the night before, the Jedi carefully reached over and placed her hand on the back of Rey's head.
Both of them fell silent then and Sage carefully pushed into her student's mind, making sure to use the Force to keep her asleep as well as to hide her presence in the dream. Her eyes slid shut and she breathed deeply as she allowed herself to sink deeper into the younger scavenger's subconscious.
His lightsaber hissed as he raised it over his head, prone to strike the helpless scavenger trapped on the ground below him. A sick sense of glee filled his chest at the fear and terror he saw reflected in her eyes which were illuminated by the scarlet glow from his weapon.
Just as he began to bring the weapon down, he felt something then: a disturbance in the dream.
And he was turning his head ever so slightly and was met with the sight of a child, bathed entirely in the red light of his saber as it crackled and spat in the snowy forest. Her gray-blue eyes were filled with tears and her sandy blonde hair was long as it dropped freely to her waist. She was dressed in a set of child-sized, cream colored Jedi robes.
Just how she looked in their childhood.
His breath was stuttering in his chest as he stared back at the unmoving child. After a moment, he quickly turned away from her so that he could once more focus on the scavenger, "Look away." His deep voice filtered through the modulator on his helmet.
"No." Her response was stern contrary to the shrillness of her voice.
He didn't even look her way and once more, raised his saber over his head for the killing strike, Rey's eyes wide with fear, "I said 'look away'."
His determination to continue on with his dream, however, faltered for a moment, still very aware of the fact that the child's eyes were still very much upon him. After a moment of contemplation as he stared down at the helpless scavenger, he paused in his actions and ever so slowly turned his head towards where the girl stood.
She was resilient as she gazed calmly back at him, her big eyes still shinning with unshed tears.
The crackling of his saber was silenced as it hissed when it folded back in on itself and disappeared into the hilt. He replaced it at his side without ever looking away from her.
It was near silent in the forest around them for a brief moment, the only real sound the whooshing of the wind as it passed through the towering trees, rattling the bare branches as it did so.
And then, she was moving towards him, her tiny, booted feet carrying her easily across the snowy ground until she stood just beside his towering form.
He tilted his helmet downwards so he could properly peer down at her through the visor. He watched as she raised her small hands and rubbed at her eyes to get rid of the tears threatening to fall. Once she was finished, she looked up at him with those strange blue eyes of hers and then slowly raised her arms up in hopes of being picked up.
The Knight of Ren hesitated for a moment, something constricting painfully in his chest as he gazed down at the little girl before his eyes flickered back over at the scavenger who still looked just as fearful but at the same time, entirely perplexed by what she was witnessing.
However, when he glanced back at the small child, he felt his resolve crumble. He knelt down at her level and simply gazed at her for a long moment before he carefully brushed some of her hair off her forehead, his leather-covered fingers trailing across her forehead to circle underneath her jaw so he could gently touch her chin and lift her face so that he could more properly see her.
"Are you afraid of me, Sage?"
She lightly shook her head, her eyes shinning calmly in the low light around them.
He allowed his hand to fall from her chin so that it rested on his knee as he continued to crouch before her, his eyes surveying her behind the darkened visor on his helmet.
Taking in a deep breath, he reluctantly held his arms out to her and she stepped forward into his embrace, her tiny hands fisting into the cowl around his neck as he closed his arms and tightened them before he rose back up to his normal height.
He turned around and began simply walking along in the woods with the tiny Jedi initiate in his arms, the scavenger long forgotten as he pulled away from her dream and into his own.
"Why is it that you aren't afraid?" He turned his head to look at her.
For a moment, she looked thoughtful, contemplative even, before her eyes lit up and a smile pulled at her lips, "Because you're just being funny, Ben." She told him and after a brief pause, she raised her tiny hand and placed it on the muzzle covering his mouth. He didn't correct her when she used his first name. "You're playing dress-up but I know that it's you underneath the silly mask."
His jaw clenched and he refrained from making any noise, finding that he didn't have the heart to correct her words.
Instead, he felt her curl herself closer to him, her head resting on his shoulder and her face burying itself into the warm, dark fabric of his cowl. Out of habit, he rubbed a soothing hand upon her small back, reminding him just how thin she had been as a child and for years even after having joined the academy.
"Are you tired, Sage?"
"No." She spoke quietly and even though she denied it, he could feel the fuzz of exhaustion lingering in her mind. "M'just... being here."
He glanced at the snowy landscape, "Are you cold?"
"Yeah."
Pausing a moment, he reached back around him and gathered a handful of his heavy cloak from where it hung freely behind him. Lifting it, he carefully draped it over her smaller body and tucked it in in hopes of keeping some of the warmth in. She wordlessly snuggled in closer to him as he cradled her to him.
There was a simmering warmth that settled low in his chest as he resumed walking once more, a hum in the Force around him as he relished in the familiar weight of her tiny body on his, that simple, little instance triggering a torrent of content emotions he had accumulated over his years as a child. For a moment, the way he had known the Force before his fall to the Darkness returned and enveloped him in its alluring grasp.
So sweet the light was sometimes.
And then, all of that broke as he felt the edges of his mind ripple again as the dream changed and suddenly a number of stormtroopers were emerging from the dark depths of the forest. However, they were not dressed as his troopers were and instead bore the old, standard-issue armor from the time of the Clone Wars.
Kylo Ren stopped walking, pausing mid-step as the troopers formed a line before him. They stood, blasters at the ready, simultaneously pointed towards him and younger Sage.
A beat later, the line broke and out from the darkness emerged none other than the imposing and striking black figure of Darth Vader himself, his cape billowing behind him as he effortlessly strode forward.
Needless to say, the young Sith was shocked to say the least.
"G-Grandfather..." His choked voice came out distorted through the modulator in his helmet. Remembering his place, he quickly bowed his head in submission and he had to refrain from the want to lift his gaze so that he could gaze at the masked face before him.
"You have done well, young Apprentice. Collecting the child that has so alluded us." Came the deep voice from the older male as he stood just across the small clearing.
He felt Sage shift against him nervously, her hand fisting tighter in his clothes, "Ben...?" She whispered as she attempted to hide herself in his dark cloak. "I'm scared."
Vader raised his arm and extended his hand in their direction, "You will give her to me."
Ren could not help it when his head snapped up when heard his grandfather's words. He felt his breath momentarily stutter in his chest as he gazed at the imposing figure before him. After a brief moment, he turned his head so that he could look at the little girl in his arms who was awake once more and completely alert. He could now so easily feel the fear that was not present before.
"What do you want with her?" He asked.
"She needs to be destroyed."
Out of reflex, the younger man took a step back and his arms tightened on the little blonde. "No." He spoke sternly but was careful to conceal the disobedience in her voice, "She is young and has much potential. She can still be swayed."
"No." It was now Vader's turn to disagree and he himself took a small step closer to the two of them. "She was born with the Light in her blood. She cannot be allowed to live."
"Ben, I'm scared." She whispered, shifting closer to him. His arms automatically held her tighter to his chest.
"It's okay, Sage." He reassured her quietly.
Lord Vader moved forward then toward his grandson so that he could reach out and place his gloved hand upon the younger male's shoulder, "Together, we can destroy the Jedi."
Ren looked up, the two masked beings staring back at one another from behind their helmets. He was also the first to look down and away, conflict stirring in his chest, "But... she's just a child."
"Who will one day grow into a Jedi of the Light," Vader raised a hand and clenched his fist, "She will carry on her grandfather's title."
"I can seduce her with the Darkness," Ren tried once more, his arms ever tightening on her smaller form as he began to grow more fearful, more anxious, "She trusts me."
Vader was quiet for a moment, "The Light calls to you through her." He observed, turning his gaze to the blonde child who looked fearfully back at him. "She is the cause for the torment you feel." Ren slowly turned and craned his neck while Sage looked up at him, her eyes wide with fear. "We must be rid of her."
He felt a sharp, stabbing invasion in his mind as he was compelled to act by a presence in his mind twisting his thoughts and actions to its own will. Soon enough, he found himself speaking though his voice was hallow as it was forced from his throat, "We must be rid of her."
It had been years since he'd felt the mind trick invade his senses due to the simple fact that he had grown so much stronger over the years but, nonetheless, he instantly recognized the feeling.
"You will destroy the last of the Jedi." Vader spoke.
"I will destroy the last of the Jedi." Once again, he was prodded to speak, his body doing so against his will. For a moment, he tried to resist the presence in his mind and he was able to fight enough to turn his head to look up at his grandfather who was watching him expectantly.
There was a sharp stabbing pain in his mind and he couldn't stop his arms as they moved on their own accord, releasing their hold on the child so that she fell to the snowy ground at their feet, the white substance cushioning her fall.
She wasn't hardly fazed and she was scrambling up and away from them, smart enough despite her age to know what they were talking about.
Ren didn't even turn away as she tried to flee but his fist was forced to clench and little Sage cried out as she was frozen in place as she was snagged by the Force.
His hand was then moving through the air to where he kept his lightsaber on his belt. His limb twitched as he did so, fighting with all the strength in his body as he internally fought against himself and the compelling thoughts in his mind.
His chest heaved as his fingers closed around the firm hilt and he pulled it free from its holder.
He was turning around then, once more against his will, to find the blonde child frozen, spine rigid and eyes wide as she stared straight ahead, completely unable to move her body. However, his other hand raised and she was snapped around to face him and the expression on her face was enough to give him pause despite the presence driving his actions forward.
Her eyes began to water once more and her lips twitched as quiet whimpers came from her throat as he drew ever closer. She was most certainly afraid of him now.
He could feel the looming presence of his grandfather behind him as he moved slowly towards the girl, acting almost as the puppeteer that was controlling the young Knight of Ren.
And then his lightsaber was igniting with a hiss, bathing the area in red and it was almost as if he were standing out on the bridge with his father once more. Only this was so much worse.
His arms slowly raised above his head, both hands clasping around the hilt.
"I'm scared, Ben!" Little Sage cried out, the tears falling freely down her cheeks and he could tell that she was struggling with all her might to get away. But, it was all for naught.
"You don't have to be anymore, Sage." He grit out his attempt at comforting her despite the vice on his mind, his entire body shaking as he fought against his grandfather's control. "You don't ever have to feel afraid again."
"You said you'd always protect me, Ben!"
"I know I did!" He grit out, his teeth clenched underneath his helmet, "Don't look at me, Sage!" He warned her as he felt his muscles beginning to weaken in their fight against themselves. "Sage, look away!" She closed her eyes and was able to turn her head away just in time.
And then, it was over.
Just as he had the night before, he bolted upright in his bed, his eyes snapping open and his chest heaving. Near painful tremors racked his both and his muscles momentarily seized out of shock.
It was just a dream, he chanted over and over in his head as he struggled to regulate his breathing. Just a horrible nightmare.
Once he stopped gulping down lungfuls of air, he started breathing in sharp inhales through his nose. His entire body seemed to be shaking still even after a few minutes to calm himself. Raising an unsteady hand, he rubbed it over his damp face and up into his sweat-soaked hair, realizing that his whole body was in a similar state of soddenness. The sheets and his bed pants clung uncomfortably to his skin.
And suddenly, he was too hot.
Throwing the covers aside and slipping from his bedroom, his bare feet slapped against the ground as he once more made a beeline for the shower, wanting to rid his body of the reminders of his horrible dream.
He only stepped from the confines of the refresher after the water in his shower had long run cold. At one point, he had cranked up the hot water up as high as it could go and for awhile, the scalding burn had been a welcome distraction from the horrors he had just witnessed.
Once back in bed, he slid back underneath the covers and lay down. After a few moments of contemplative silence, he brought his legs up to his chest as he curled in on himself as an ache burned sharply in his chest.
This was not what I meant when I wanted you to come visit me in my dreams.
He lay like that for a long while, his dark eyes staring unseeingly out the large viewport in his room, the distant stars winking and shinning back at him. And yet, the galaxy had never felt so desolate.
However, he soon felt the haze of sleep begin to cloud his mind again and just when he felt his mind falling over the edge of slumber, there was suddenly a crackle in the air and a flash of lightning.
However, it did little to faze him but, all at once, he felt a presence in the room, "Ben...?"
Propping himself up on his elbow, he looked over his shoulder to where the voice had come from. Lightning and thunder rolled once more, momentarily illuminating the tiny sandy-haired child who stood partially hidden behind the frame of his door, her gray-blue eyes wide with fear in them.
He let out a shaky breath as he gazed at her, more lightning flickering outside and brightening the room again. And she was still there, plain as day like she had been before in his previous dream.
For a moment, he was self-conscious about having his face bare and revealed to the child, uneasy with the thought of her seeing his features and the scar that he now bore. Instead, he kept his head low and bowed slightly in hopes of keeping his face in the shadows.
"What's wrong, Sage?" His voice broke on her name despite his momentary efforts to steel himself.
"I'm scared." She admitted quietly and just then, there was a huge crackle and flash as the storm outside continued to roll. He felt the fear she was feeling spike sharply.
Ren glanced over his shoulder at the viewport, "Because of the storm?" She gave a small nod of her head. The Knight simply lay there for a moment, contemplating the instance at hand. Then, wordlessly, he was sighing and pushing the covers back, raising his arm in a sign of welcome as he did so.
Relief seemed to cross the six year old's face and she was running then across the room before throwing herself up onto the mattress so that she could scramble across the soft sheets and into the warm embrace that awaited her.
She was instantly curling up against his chest and his arms wrapped around the small girl, enveloping her in their protection and warmth once more, pulling her that much closer to him. And she was content to just lay there in the circle of his strong arms, radiating heat as she so often did when they were younger.
It was like she always held the desert heat in her blood, the scorching furnace of Beheboth forever burning in her veins.
"Is this better?" He felt her nod as she lay snuggled against his chest.
Ren bowed his head slightly so that he could rest his lips on her hairline, his nose nestled in the silky golden locks atop her head. And, outside the walls of his room, the thunderstorm raged and yet the apprehension he felt before from the girl had calmed immediately as soon as she had been accepted into his embrace.
All this was a dream he knew; there were no storms out in the black void of space. Sage was no longer a little girl or even alive for that matter. Yet, he could not find it in himself to care.
For he would almost take this dream over any other. Almost.
His most ideal dream would be the two of them together, aged as they were, a million lightyears away from both the Resistance and the First Order. Both engulfed and empowered with the Force as they had been. And they were happy.
But, he decided, this dream... this dream, would do for now.
I have all the feels.
I'm sorry, guys. Both for the fact that this took so long and for the abundance of feels that I provided for you. Anyway... Yay for more Kylo! He's probably going to have another appearance in the next chapter as well but then we're going to do some time skipping and jumps. And then, I'm debating on having... someone else joining the Jedi Academy... We'll see about that.
Anyway, thanks to all of those who reviewed and left kudos/favorited/followed/bookmarked Spectrum!
YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, READ AND REVIEW!
Love,
Blue