Author's Note: First, thank you for reading and reviewing. Second, sorry for the delay but I have so much on my plate right now. Even with how hectic this year has been, the fall was a particularly hellish time. Usually, writing helps me keep my sanity, but not this time.
Don't fear though, although updates may lag – they will keep coming.
In regards to this chapter, I think that there are many ways for Harry to react to the news of the prophecy and this is simply one of those. I tried to take into account what he had just been through.
Hope you enjoy!
Standard disclaimer about not owning anything; I am so thankful for JKR and all that she did for us. She gave us one of the greatest gifts, and so many people have taken to this site and played brilliantly with her creation. We should have a JKR day and it should be a global holiday!
Harry couldn't think straight as he left Minerva's office after finally getting that last puzzle piece which put his life together. Of course a prophecy about him and Voldemort existed; he just hadn't been able to see the big picture yet – but once he had, it explained too much to be anything other than the truth.
The dimly lit corridors in the castle blurred together as Harry's feet carried him to an unknown destination. He hardly noticed the few students that were out and about and they were so used to giving him space that they didn't even see him pass.
His journey ended in a familiar, though unexpected place, and after all of the strange events in his life – he just went with it and knocked on the door.
Harry barely had any time to think about what he was going to actually say as the door was quickly pulled open and an annoyed Severus Snape stood in the doorframe, ready to berate the one who dared to disturb him at this hour. However, whatever he had been about to say or do was put on hold the moment he saw Harry's face.
Though, the abrupt change that silenced Professor Snape did not do the same for Harry, who proceeded to blurt the thoughts that would forever seem to be etched into his mind now.
"A prophecy," he stated, forcing Snape to react quickly as this was not a conversation to be had in an open hallway.
"Are you a bloody fool?" he whispered harshly at the Gryffindor as he dragged Harry into his office and closed the door behind him.
"A prophecy," he stated again, ignoring the man's words for caution completely. "There is a prophecy about me and Voldemort, isn't there!" Harry stated confidently.
Out of everyone in the school, Snape was the one person that wouldn't sugarcoat his answer.
Snape eyed the young man carefully, knowing that this was a delicate situation and one that he had not expected to be in. As it was, there were very real issues that this would bring up between them and he thought he would have had more time after their last talk.
"What brought this on?" Snape inquired carefully, giving himself more time to think of an adequate response.
"I just had a career session with Professor McGonagall, and we were talking about the Department of Mysteries. She listed some of the areas of work available, but once I heard about the Hall of Prophecy – it just clicked. Tell me, is it true?"
There was anger and frustration in Harry's eyes and tears had started to well up, threatening to spill over his cheeks.
Snape felt an uncomfortable sensation in his chest as emotions from his past fought their way to the surface.
It reminded him too much of how Lily had finally ended their friendship after he had called her the unthinkable, and he would do whatever he could to make that feeling go away.
"Yes," he said quietly as he stepped back, shocked from the explosive feelings of his careless youth coming back to him after all of these years of being repressed.
The rage in Harry simmered as he confronted that absolution of finally knowing the truth.
"That's why he is always after me," he assessed correctly – not even looking to Snape.
He shook his head as he helped himself to the chair facing Snape's desk and sat with head in his hands.
All of the progress that he had made in the aftermath of Cedric's tragedy felt like it was for nothing as he could feel the hopelessness wanting to return.
Fortunately, however, his brain refused to go down that path once more and employed Occlumency to stave off another descent into isolation.
Snape could only look at him and feel regret for every time that he had made Harry's life harder because of a grudge that he had held against James, when he knew of what Harry would have to someday face.
'How could I have made this worse?' he asked himself, appalled at how he had failed Lily yet again.
The silence continued for some time as both were lost in a world unto themselves; however, eventually Harry had calmed enough to realize that there were still more questions that need to be asked.
"Who else knows?" was the first to leave his lips.
Snape drew in a breath as he contemplated his options, knowing that everything would likely be revealed tonight.
"Wouldn't you rather discuss this with Sirius, or the Headmaster?" Snape inquired instead of answering Harry's questions. Though, his intent wasn't to get himself out of the hot seat; instead, he did doubt that he was the best one to have this conversation with Harry.
"Of course they know," Harry snorted. "How could they not? Dumbledore was waiting until I learned Occlumency and Sirius, well, I guess it's not important that he knew. I think he wanted to tell me but I don't think he wanted to put anything else on me."
Harry was working through this out loud and talking to himself more than needing a confirmation from Snape. And he just couldn't fault Sirius for withholding this, the man had been through hell just watching him deal with Cedric – Harry knew that he would have withheld this forever if he could have. Harry had seen it in his eyes during their weekly dinners, now that he looked back on it.
"Who else knows? McGonagall?" Harry pressed Snape once he was finished thinking about Sirius.
Severus gave a brief nod, holding back further explanation because a part of him, though ashamed with himself and afraid of where this conversation could head, was amazed of how Harry was working through this and asking all of the right questions.
And Harry kept putting all of the pieces together, until he reached some very heavy realizations.
He stood up from the chair, finding that he could no longer sit in one place until he had more answers.
"Did my parents know?" Harry asked, inadvertently causing a pain in Severus' heart as he remembered finding Lily dead in the house and holding her while her body was still warm. He would never escape the guilt of knowing that he had been the one to condemn her to that fate.
"They were aware," Snape confirmed in an unusual tone that Harry had never heard before from the man, almost as if he were morose – which didn't sound right on him. But he had other things to think about and so moved on.
"And so that explains why they went into hiding," Harry again answered his own question, but in the process only discovered new ones to be asked.
The main question about what exactly the prophecy said was something that Harry was saving for last, knowing that he would come to it eventually but also realizing that he was quite apprehensive about hearing what it explicitly said or stated. He hardly thought it said that Voldemort would definitely kill him – but there was always that chance.
"If they went into hiding, and Voldemort has been seemingly after me my whole life, then he must have known too."
Harry stopped pacing and turned to look directly at Snape.
"How did he find out? How did anyone find out? Who made the prophecy?"
Of everything that Snape had ever faced – including being under the scrutiny of the Dark Lord – this was by far the hardest time he had ever had in keeping it together and he opened his mouth to respond but no sound came out.
"Don't tell me it was Trelawney?" Harry said suddenly remembering Dumbledore confirming that she had made one other prophecy after the events of his third year.
Snape nodded his head again, even more amazed at Harry's incredible mind – and yet he found himself wishing that Harry wasn't putting all of this together so quickly.
And now Harry knew how Dumbledore had found out about it, but it still didn't explain how Voldemort came to hear of its existence. Something vital was missing that connected the two events, and Harry was beginning to suspect by the odd behavior of the man in front of him that he knew something about it.
A cold sense of dread began to form in Harry's stomach as he thought back to his past conversation with Snape. Harry's mastery of Occlumency had not only allowed him to function again after the pain of losing Cedric, but it had helped him to organize his mind and assist his problem-solving abilities.
"How did Voldemort find out," Harry asked again in a sharper tone? He was so close to knowing the truth that time seemed to slow around him.
'This is it,' Snape thought. The moment had come where he had to atone for his sins from the one person still alive that had been impacted by them the most.
"I overheard part of the conversation between Trelawney and Dumbledore," Snape answered in a low and hollow voice. He wasn't able to meet Harry's eyes.
"You were on his side," Harry's voice cracked, wanting to remember all of the anger that he had ever felt for the man but finding that it just wasn't there anymore.
"You told him," echoed silently off the walls as tears began to stain Harry's cheek.
"That was what you did, the thing that you regret, isn't it?" he asked as he backed into a wall and slid down. Tears were freely flowing down his cheeks now.
"Only the lines that I knew," Snape said, hanging his head in shame.
Harry now knew why he was having trouble being angry with the man, even though he wanted to be – because part of him had already forgiven him when they had last talked.
Harry knew the man was truly sorry for what he had done. Before Occlumency, Harry could have imagined trying to shoot spells off at the man in a blinding rage. However, in mastering Occlumency, one becomes accustomed to going over the information that is more readily available in your mind. It tended to make people more logical and less prone to emotional outbursts. That was certainly true for Harry and one of the reasons he had adjusted to life after Cedric.
And a large part of it was that he was just too tired to hate the man who Harry could see cracks beginning to form in his usual façade that had to have been a defense mechanism.
"Is that why you changed sides?" Harry asked in a quiet but pointed manner, idly wondering if this was what Dumbledore had always been referring to when he had given his reasons for trusting the man so absolutely.
Snape's exterior unraveled even more and his face turned as white as Harry had ever seen it. He didn't need to see anything else to know that Snape was forever against Voldemort and truly sorry for his role in shaping his own future.
"What did the prophecy say?" Harry said after some time, looking up at Snape who was now using the desk to help him remain standing. He had been waiting at any moment for Harry's outburst and a part of him just wanted to let it happen. Snape almost wanted to be punished for what he had done.
Snape regained some measure of his former self; enough to meet Harry's oddly calm eyes.
"I only know the first few lines; I believe that only Dumbledore knows it in full, while the others are only aware of its existence."
"So Voldemort doesn't know the full thing?"
Snape was starting to worry that Harry was taking this too well, but correctly reasoned that he had just accepted what fate had always been trying to tell him, and that deep down Harry ultimately wasn't that surprised to learn any of this.
In fact, it was strangely comforting in knowing that every odd and horrible thing that happened in your life had a reason. At least now he knew, truly, what he was up against and what had always been hovering over him.
Just then, and surprisingly fortuitous, a knock sounded at the door.
It took a few seconds for Snape to get his bearings before opening the door.
"Headmaster, Mr. Black," Snape indicated aloud, realizing that Harry was hidden from view by the open door but wanting to see what they wanted first.
Albus peered at the man with a curious expression behind his half-moon spectacles, while Sirius was anxious to begin scouring the castle for his godson.
"Minerva has reason to believe that Harry has uncovered a few things and has yet to return to Gryffindor. Seeing as it is past curfew, we are concerned for his well-being and would like to find him."
Snape opened the door wider and let them in. Sirius was confused at first until he saw that Harry was there, sitting against the wall and staring at the group. But then he became even more confused at why Harry was here in the first place; however, that thought was put on hold as he went over to his godson – relieved that he was in one piece.
"Harry, are you alright?" He crouched down in front of him and put his hands on Harry's shoulders.
Harry nodded as Dumbledore, in one of his more colorful robes, entered the room and Snape closed the door behind him.
"I know about the prophecy," he replied, looking Sirius right in the eye and watching his face morph from one heavy emotion to the next.
"In fact, Snape was just helping to clarify a few things," he said and looked to Dumbledore pointedly.
"I would like to hear it in full," Harry said in an even tone that demonstrated to everyone that he was facing the world as an adult wizard – even if he was a few years short of the designated age.
"Sirius looked around, going from Harry to Snape, where his eyes lingered for a few additional seconds before turning to Dumbledore."
"That is quite sensitive information, Harry. Are you sure you are ready?"
Surprisingly, Snape answered him.
"He knows everything else headmaster," Snape explained, giving Albus his vote of confidence that it was high time that he be told.
Albus raised his eyebrow in response. He would have expected Harry to be in a different state than the one that he found him in upon learning that Snape was the reason his parents were dead.
"Is that so?" Albus mused.
When he had informed Harry that he had information to tell him after he had mastered Occlumency, he thought that he had bought himself more time. It wasn't that he wanted to withhold the information from him – but it was vital, in his mind, to keep this close to his chest. And a part of him was worried about how Harry would view him once he knew everything about the prophecy, leaving Albus with the task of still informing him about Horcruxes – which would be paramount to Voldemort's defeat.
But seeing as that now he really didn't have much of a choice since Sirius could just take Harry to the Hall of Prophecy for him to hear it for himself, he gave in.
"Very well, but keep it to yourself."
He waited until the group nodded, then added, "I assume that you will tell your friends?"
It was obvious that he was talking to Harry about Ron and Hermione, but oddly, the first name that popped into Harry's brain was Charlie.
Just the same, Harry nodded anyway – he couldn't see how he could keep that kind of information from those who had stuck by him for all these years.
Dumbledore thought a moment, seeing how this could eventually turn into his favor and nodded his head once more.
Then he moved the tip of his wand to his head and drew forth a shimmering blue strand that danced before them all and then started to take shape.
A ghostly, miniature version of Trelawney rose before them and uttered the prophecy in a raspy voice.
"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not... for either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies... "
Harry positioned himself more comfortably in the last compartment on the Hogwarts Express as Hermione and Ron went to start their Prefect rounds. In the week since he had learned about the prophecy and everything else that had followed, it was nice to just have some time to himself.
Out of everyone there, Sirius had reacted the worst to hearing about the prophecy in full and had insisted that Harry spend each evening with him. He was afraid that Harry wasn't taking the news well as he seemed so well-adjusted; when in reality it was Sirius that wasn't taking the news well. Though he had known that a prophecy had existed, hearing the exact words had pushed him over the edge and he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to protect Harry.
For Harry, it was almost a relief to finally be in the know for once about things. He still had plenty of questions about everything – but he at least knew the reason that had dictated his life from before he had even been born.
Hermione and Ron hadn't really known how to react to the news once Harry had told them – but as he expected – it didn't push them away. If anything, it cemented the bond between them even more and he was further comforted by them sticking by his side.
Before he had told them he wondered if it was even their burden to deal with it and had half-entertained the idea of telling them that they would be better off not getting involved with him in order to protect them. But he had pushed that idea aside as it wasn't respectful to them.
His friends had battled with him up until this point and they knew what they were getting into and what was at risk and he had left it for them to decide.
Just thinking about having people like that in his life was one of the reasons that he suspected had allowed him to keep it together this past week, along with Charlie and Occlumency.
Harry smiled and positioned himself to be comfortable for the long ride and stretched out his legs on the seat across from him. Sirius had wanted him to return to Grimmauld Place with him but Harry felt like it was best to have some sort of normalcy in his life and wanted to spend the extra time with his friends. He felt like he had spent so much time dealing with Cedric by himself that he didn't want to isolate himself anymore than he could help it. And that meant taking the train – even if he had to wait for Ron and Hermione to finish their Prefect rounds.
But even that gave him time to get himself prepared for the holidays. Charlie had written back to Harry in record time and though he had read his letter many times previously, Harry pulled it out again and went through it one more time. He was drawn to anything that gave him a momentary pause from his troubles and his communications with Charlie was certainly something that did that.
Harry,
Of course I will stop by over Christmas, though I will also see you at the Burrow as well. Ron told me that you plan on staying for a few days. I look forward to it and would be glad to share my OWL experience with you.
How did your meeting with old McGonagall go? I thought she was really helpful when I mentioned what I was interested in and she took it seriously and helped me get the internship that ultimately led me to Romania. I know she can a bit stiff, but she does care about her lions.
I think you would fit right in at the Department of Mysteries or in the DMLE or something else that maybe you haven't thought of yet. There is always time to change your mind (as long as you have the requisite OWLS and NEWTs).
Harry – it makes me really happy to know that I am helping you through this. I can't tell you how I wished I had something like that to help me along. I know it doesn't make it all go away, but really anything that makes it more bearable is a gift from Merlin! Just don't feel like you need to take all of my suggestions because different things work for different people (and I am no expert in mind healing).
Ron has sounded a lot better in his letters to me. You would never know how much he worries about you or Hermione – or anyone that he cares about, really. He can be the thickest person at times but he means well and he really is someone that you want to have your back.
I think you should take visiting Cedric one day at a time. Don't give yourself any extra pressure. If you want to see him over break on a particular day – then go see him, and if you don't or are worried about something, well then that is okay too. I think you are strong in many ways and only you will know how seeing him will be – I am always available if you want to talk about it or need someone to take you. But again, don't decide on that right now. Take it as it comes.
But whatever you do, don't blame yourself! Seriously, the blame lays on the Dementor, and no one else. I know that is hard to get – but if anyone knows about that sort of thing, I do.
And when I visit Geoff's grave, which took me some time to get around to that FYI, I don't apologize for anything. At least, I don't anymore because I know that guilt would only make it worse and harder to deal with. Besides, he wouldn't blame me and would likely come back to kick my arse if he knew that I did!
Your life is unusual, I agree, and if you want to talk about it – again, I would be more than happy to if it helps you. I wonder what else you have to tell me that I don't already know. Ron doesn't exactly keep his mouth shut about the year when he comes home during the summer. Some of the things he has told me I disregarded as fanciful tales that couldn't possible be true… but now I'm not so sure, especially with the events of what happened to Ginny (which I'm still not sure about what exactly happened).
Just one thing now that I am thinking about it: don't worry about me breaking your confidence. What you tell me I will assume stays between us. Deal? And perhaps it would be good if you did the same, though I am pretty open about my life except that I still find it hard to talk about Geoff with certain people. You of course, are not one of them. It is weird that we barely know each other and yet write this frankly, but then again, perhaps we sometimes shouldn't question everything and go with it.
For example, I hardly spoke to anyone about my sexuality, even now I haven't really discussed it with my parents. They just accepted it and moved on but we never really talked about what I was feeling.
I had some encounters with classmates at Hogwarts (first time I had Ogdens) and just went with it. I realized how good it felt and continued with that after Hogwarts. Though, it was a little different for me because it was so soon after You-Know-Who that people tended to go overboard with enjoying themselves and mostly turned a blind eye. I think it was easier to be different then – even if it was a few years ago. Though, I can't say I have ever experienced much negativity in regards to being gay. It's different for wizards and not like how it is viewed in the muggle world (though they do have great gay clubs if you like dancing – and when you are older).
In regards to Geoff, how about I hold off on that until I see you. I think writing about that would be harder than just telling you in person. Which is right around the corner!
I look forward to seeing you and will owl you some times that work and you can tell me what is good for you. It would be nice to have one-on-one time because you know we won't get it if you visit the Burrow. (My mum will be too busy trying to feed you).
~ Charlie.
Thoughts? My intent going forward is to focus on Harry/Charlie for a little while. I think that 5th year and 6th year will be largely similar (aside from certain things that I won't spoil).
