I decided that, enough was enough. After joining the Durarara! fandom months ago, I still hadn't written a single fic so, here I am! I absolutely adore the Izuo pairing and have always wanted to write it but, I was afraid that they'd be too OOC, which I think they are however, as I write this I re-watch episodes and read other people's stories so hopefully it should improve as I continue. I know my writing isn't the best (especially compared to all of you amazing authors out there, I learns from you all so, thank you) so please bare with me, I'll hopefully improve that too!
I personally think that there aren't enough fanfics where Shizuo has to be taken care of compared to the amount where Shizuo takes care of Izaya so, here you go, I'll finally contribute to my precious fandom: this is my second obsession after Furuba.
For each chapter, I'll aim for a minimum of about 2,000 words because I want to keep the plot consistent and ongoing - no slow intro or filler chapters.
This story will go on for a while, I'll hopefully have an update per week and this will have about 20 chapters UNLESS you guys give me really good plot ideas. If that happens, the story will most likely be extended to fit that in.
I really appreciate your appreciation haha :) it spurs me on to see those reviews, follows and favourites because I know that you really like my lil' story, so thank you very much to everyone who has contributed to that, enjoy!
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Shinra snapped, narrowing his eyes in an uncharacteristically angered way and glaring daggers into Izaya's very soul.
"What have I done now?"
"Don't play dumb with me Orihara Izaya! You know what you've done," He said, huffing as for once in his life he failed trying to calm himself down.
Although he wasn't used to an angered Shinra, he took the situation in stride and made the most of it by finding the funny side, fuelling his amusement and Shinra's fury as he continued to play mock-innocent.
"Why couldn't you just have not been an absolute prick the first day you met him, maybe then this could have been avoided, maybe then you'd even be friends!" He ranted, serving to make his friend chuckle at the his outrageous wishes.
"I'll have you know that I take pride in the way I treat my 'friend's,"
"I bet you take even more pride in knowing just how completely frightened he is," Shinra said, spitting the words from his mouth in disgust knowing that one of his closest friends was a few rooms away, shaking and most likely sobbing from fright.
"You know me too well,"
"Not. Funny."
Izaya, leaned against the wall, turning his head slightly to the side as he gazed at his friend, his smirk growing wider as the thought of the trembling, screaming blonde entered his head once more causing him to burst into a fit of childish giggles. "On the contrary, it's hilarious, I couldn't think of anything more amusing,"
"How about me punching you in the face?" He threatened, only causing the raven to laugh again, this tie so hard that he had to clutch his sides from the sudden shooting pain.
"Hahahaha! Oh, only a friend as good as you could come up with something funnier than their own joke,"
Shinra could feel overwhelming waves of pain roll through his head the symptoms of an oncoming headache. "I'm being serious!"
"Which just makes it all the more fun!"
"Izaya, stop!"
At the raw anger and irritation in his voice, Izaya squinted his eyes and pouts, knowing if he continues he'll be thrown out and ignored and, consequently miss out on everything else that happens. So he shut up and looked at his bespectacled friend expectantly.
"It's not funny..." he repeats, clutching his forehead and closing his eyes, trying to fight off exhaustion. "He's seriously terrified and the operation seems to have only made it worse, if I'd had known he'd become so... vulnerable, I would've never went through with it." He said, sighing as he leaned against the wall under the eyes of a curious Izaya.
"Operation?" He asked. standing up straight.
"Yeah," Shinra said, his voice conveying fatigue. "He has total control yet at the same time, no control over his strength."
"Go on," Izaya urged.
He was hesitant to reply to the raven as he opened his eyes. The thought of Izaya sending a gang of thugs after Shizuo because he knew he wouldn't be able to fight them off made him frown, already feeling concerned for what could happen. "Actually, I don't know if I should tell you this, Izaya. You're an informant and with this information, you could get Shizuo killed easily."
"I know I may not be the most trustworthy person," he started, trying not to sound as sincere as he really meant, the last thing he needed was Shinra thinking he was a good person deep down or that kind of crap. "But you are one of my few friends, I wouldn't betray you're trust and I know if I did, Celty is your ally and would use her relations to attack me and make me regret it. So you can tell me. Plus you sound tired and stressed, it wouldn't hurt to confide in me every now and then."
He thought about Izaya's earnest words for a moment, weighing the pros and cons before finally giving in and deciding to confess. After all, the whole Shizuo situation was getting out of control, if he had know it would be this much trouble, he would've never suggested it. "He no longer has the ability to use his strength unless his boss or the person 'in charge of him' tells him to use it. They can basically activate and deactivate it." He confessed, shifting so that he was leaning most of his back onto the wall allowing him to easily rest his head onto the cool surface.
"Why would he want that, he has no control,"
"True but, he still controls what he does. Plus, since he works for Tom-san - who he trusts - there's not a problem. Tom-san tell him when to activate it as they go to the places to collect the debts and deactivate it afterwards."
_So that's why he wasn't throwing anything at me..._
"Izaya, whatever you do, please don't tell anyone about this, you need to swear to me that you won't."
In all seriousness, Izaya wouldn't betray one of his few friends, even if the outcome of doing it caused the blonde pain. Friends like Shinra were too rare and problems like Shizuo were too exhausting. So he earnestly replied: "No need to worry, Shinra. I swear."
Before either of them could say anything else, Celty burst into the hallway in which they were standing, the shadows from her neck spilling into torrents of darkness and distress.
"Huh? Celty, what is-"
He was cut off as she thrust her PDA into his face for him to read.
_'He was sitting with me and talking to me but then he suddenly started crying because he felt scared and so I tried to calm him down but then he started to hyperventilate and he couldn't calm down!'_
"I understand, go an get some of the sedative I used earlier and wait outside of the room in case he won't calm down again." He said, already moving past the two people and heading straight for the guest room Shizuo had been resting in.
He gently pulled down the handle and crept in, closing it quietly as he walked in. "Shizuo?" He called out, careful not to scare the already distressed blonde as he moved to the bed in which a hunched figure sat, shaking and sobbing, breathing coming out in quick, irregular gasps.
"Shizuo, I'm going to need you to calm down," he said, kneeling on the bed next to his friend and rubbing circles into his back, frowning when shaking shoulders flinched harshly. "Shizuo, it's going to be okay, I promise." he said quietly, soothing the blonde. "I know you're scared right now but you're going to calm down and breathe and then we can talk and do whatever you like, okay?"
Shizuo didn't know what had happened. He was sitting on the bed with Celt , talking quietly when she brought up how he was dealing without his strength. At first he had tried explaining how he was having to adapt but when she kept asking question upon question, he couldn't keep up and had started to panic. He knew that Shinra was trying to help him and so he attempted to push away dark thoughts of the future of which he was unprepared.
It seems his voice was getting through to the blonde, as he started to lean into the brunette and sob against his chest.
"Shh, it's okay..." he whispered, continuing to run patterns into his back, sighing in relief when his breathing started to return to a more normal pace and the sobbing started to subside. "You're going to be okay," Shinra promised when the blonde finally stopped crying, his laboured breathing stable for the most part as he took deep breaths and tried to move backwards and wrap his trembling arms around himself which the brunette allowed him to do.
He reached forward to try and show some more support only to have Shizuo slap his hand away and lean against the wall. "Please don't touch me..." he whispered, eyes still clenched tight as he tried to completely calm down.
Shinra nodded in understanding, of course the blonde didn't want to be touched, he'd been trapped with a malicious person in a metal cage, he had thought he was going to die, he was scared and being surrounded by people wasn't helping, maybe he just needed to be left alone for a while to ground and calm himself. And maybe the reason he only thought of pros to leaving his friend alone was because he wasn't used to seeing the blonde so emotionally distressed which, in turn, upset him.
"Okay, Shizuo, we're going to leave you in here for a bit, okay? Me and Celty will be outside, come when you're ready," he said as he lifted himself off of the bed and stepped back, giving Shizuo a last once-over before he left. The blonde had closed his eyes and was clutching onto a discarded pillow. He sighed as he stepped out of the room, closing the door softly behind him.
_'How is he?'_ Celty asked as soon as she spotted him walking into their living room.
"He's calming down by himself right now, he just needs some time alone after what happened." He said, moving to sit down next to where Celty had been, facing Izaya who was leisurely sipping on a steaming mug of coffee, that shit-eating smirk of his holding back his laughter.
"So, Shinra, will you tell me what's going on with Shizu-chan?"
"Now why would I do that? Why do you want to know? It's not like he's a 'monster' anymore," He replied, frowning before adding an afterthought. "If you say anything to so with being an Informant, I'm going to kick you out."
Now that earned a wry chuckle from the raven. "I want to know because Shizu-chan will always be a monster and when monsters go out of control, somebody needs to contain them."
Before Shinra replied, he smiled up at Celty, who had also brought him a warm cup of coffee before placing a pale hand onto his back in a reassuring manner.
_'I want to know what's going on with him too, Shinra. I'm worried."_ she typed, showing him her PDA as she took a seat beside him.
"You're right, you're owed an explanation. You too, Izaya. You may not see eye-to-eye with Shizuo but, I guess that you're one of my friends and I kind of do want to talk about it."
Izaya remained silent, not wanting to ruin his chance by saying some snarky comment to get on Shinra's nerves and get him kicked out. Instead, he merely put his coffee down and looked directly at his friend to show that he was listening.
"Well, you may not believe this but, Shizuo has always been a very anxious person for a few reasons... His family always struggled with financial issues when he was been raised, and that's excluding the debts he raked up. That just made it worse," he started, sipping his coffee and relishing in the warmth it gave it as he thought out what he'd say next. "His parents loved him very much but, with all the stress they'd snap at him a lot, so whenever he did something he knew was wrong, he'd always feel anxious going home and would try to stay over here or hang out after school."
Celty started typing on her PDA making Shinra pause and watch at the way her hands shook softly knowing that she was reluctant to hear the answer of what she was going to ask. _'Did they ever... hit him? I know that he's stronger than his parents but, he would feel way to guilty to ever hurt them, no matter what.'_
Izaya looked genuinely curious at the possible answer, wondering if Shizuo would stoop so low as to hit his own parents just because of a couple slaps. Though, it's not as if he was ever put in that position. Despite his twisted appearance, him and his sisters were quite spoiled, their parents taking every chance to show them just how much they were loved.
"No, I don't think they ever hit him, they wouldn't do that. But they'd shout at him. He said that they would argue with each other on what to do with him when they thought he was sleeping."
"Haha! Of course they would, I bet they wanted to throw him into care!" Izaya burst out, laughing to himself, stopping short when he felt the heat of Shinra and Celty's glare, her shadows starting to dangerously swirl. "My bad..."
"School also stressed him out, you wasted a lot of his time by provoking him into chasing you, his grades dropped to an all time low so he had to spend hours a week studying with me. It was the teachers calling him back at the end of the day almost everyday to shout at him and tell him how bad his grades were that really got to him. At first he would get furious and break something before leaving but, when he came here afterwards I could see how upset he was, his anxiety just got worse from there. Now that he can't use his strength without Tanaka-san telling him to, he's paranoid that he's going to get attacked and won't be able to escape."
"But where does the claustrophobia thing come from?" Izaya asked.
"That, I do know. He'd just been operated on a few days ago and then suddenly he's trapped in a small space with his enemy; not to mention that the lift broke down and he thought he was going to die which is why he had an attack. That's enough for him to develop a phobia." Shinra said, leaning back and closing his eyes. He couldn't help but admit that he was worried for his friend. He was helpless and vulnerable without his strength however, he had realised that since the operation, Shizuo had seemed a lot calmer and happier, never losing his temper when seeing Izaya until today. That was definitely an improvement, if he could learn to control that temper around Izaya, he'd never have the types of problems he had pre-op. He smiled at that, thinking of the new life he was helping his friend build. Shizuo deserved happiness in his life, and through all of his attempts to experiment on his friend, all he truly wanted was for him to be content. Hearing Izaya's voice had brought a doubtful thought into his mind.
"Izaya," he said, catching the raven's attention. "If you use _any_ of this against Shizuo in _any_ way or get him hurt because of this information, I will never forgive you." He said staring directly into those cunning maroon orbs. Saying 'never' was quite an overstatement. He knew that if Shizuo received physical injuries, only days after they'd healed Shinra would be back to happily chattering away to Izaya the next time they met which was often.
_'Me neither.'_ Celty added, but the way her shadows coiled threateningly showed just how serious she was, she wouldn't allow Izaya to hurt her best friend and get away with it.
He smirked at them and nodded his head. "Understood."
"I need to hear you say it."
He mockingly put his hand on his heart and said "I swear, I will never use this against or as a way to harm Shizu-chan."
"Good," Shinra said, wincing as he thought about what he was going to ask of Izaya next. "Uh, I have a favour to ask of you, Izaya."
At this, the raven's interest piqued as he looked at Shinra expectantly.
Celty seemed to have sensed what her boyfriend was going to ask as she turned to face the brunette and shook her hands in a way that mean 'No way, anyone but him!'
"Will you let Shizuo stay with you for a while?"
Still smirking, Izaya blinked, thinking he'd misheard his bespectacled friend. "Stay with me?" he repeated raising a brow as a mop of brown hair nodded. He chuckled softly at the thought of a crying monster sat chained to a bed, unable to do anything but beg as he was at the mercy of Izaya's hand. But it seemed like it was too much trouble than it was worth. Yes, he loved to anger and provoke Shizuo, his violent outbursts and displays of brutality proved to be quite the entertainment and best way to reinforce into the brute's mind just what a destructive beast he was. The danger and exhilaration that coursed through his veins and left him exuberant for hours after a chase was what he thrived off of however, the proposal of having him babysit a mindless nuisance was something else entirely so instead he simply said no. "Why do you want him to stay with me anyway?" He asked curiously.
"Me and Celty are going to Ireland in a couple of days. I didn't expect Shizuo to have such bad anxiety." Shinra confessed, balling his hand as they rested on his knees.
"Anxiety? It was one fucking panic attack."
"I diagnosed him a while ago."
"Well get someone else to do it, I certainly have better things to do than supervise a crying Shizu-chan."
Shinra sighed in exasperation, Celty visibly slouching in the relief that came with knowing her best friend wouldn't have to stay with the devious informant. After years of fighting, Shizuo should be able to defend himself if it came down to it but, she still couldn't fully trust in his ability when he was going through emotional interval.
"Izaya please, I wouldn't ask if I wasn't desperate, I know that something bad's going to happen if I leave him alone."
"Then cancel the trip."
Celty seemed to sigh in dismay at the statement, her shadows swirling slowly and falling to the floor.
"I can't! We've been planning this for months. Please, Izaya. I'll owe you one."
Izaya decided to give in at that, Shinra owing him a favour was something that could come in handy if he needed someone to rely on under potentially perilous circumstances. "Okay, I agree. Shizu-chan can stay with me."
"Really?" Shinra said, his eyes widening slightly and gleaming with hope as he sat up straight. He hadn't actually expected Izaya to cave in so easily or for such a little price. Maybe he really treasured what Shinra could do for him when he was in need. The idea of it just made Shinra's smile all the more jovial.
"Yeah, after all, what are friends for?" He wasn't doing this for Shizuo, he was doing it for Shinra because, although he wasn't an affectionate person, Shinra was good to him and was always there for him, the least he owed him was agreeing to something he wanted.
"Thank you, Izaya. I really appreciate it. I'll tell Shizuo when he comes back out, he's probably sleeping right now, he was quite exhausted when I went in there."
"Okay, but remember, just because I agreed to take him in, doesn't mean he'll agree," the raven said, standing up to get his coat. "I'm going to head home now."
"Of course, when Shizuo agrees, I'll bring him over tomorrow?"
"Sure." he replied, walking to the hallway that led to the door with a trailing Shinra following behind.
"Thank you, he'll be there at around midday."
"Okay." He said, walking out of the door and into the open. The subtle cold of the afternoon was starting to blend into the night, rising to more wintry levels. Evenings began to slip quicker into the darkness of night, satisfying to the informant who flourished under the concealment and anonymity it provided. As he walked through the desolate streets of Ikebukuro leading towards his apartment, he stepped on a fallen frangible leaf that crunched into fragments underfoot, leaving pale marks of red and gold. He couldn't prevent a smirk from twisting his lips: it was the start of a new season and a new change in his and a monster's relationship and by the time it had come to an end, someone or something should surely be shattered beyond repair.