A/N: So here is the anniversary chapter. Yes, it is not a happy one, but I threw in a bit of romance towards the end. We are fast approaching the end of this story now. Based on my plan, there is another 8 chapters to go. And in answer to someone who asked, be patient, the proposal comes up in Chapter 17.
There was a lull in the battle. He had one hour before he had to either face Voldemort or Voldemort would murder everyone who stood in his way to finding Harry.
He found himself in front of the doors to the Great Hall. However, standing there, something didn't feel right. It was too quiet. There was just silence. And why were the doors shut?
He pushed the doors to the hall open and immediately wished he hadn't. All he could see were piles upon piles of dead bodies. He tried to run away, but his feet seem to take on a life of their own and he found himself walking into the makeshift mortuary.
He saw the bodies of those who he knew had died. Remus and Tonks were laid with their hands clasped together. Colin had his camera clutched tightly in his hands. Fred had the echo of his final smile on his face. As he looked at each of their bodies, something seemed off about what he was looking at. However, he was not given the time to figure it out as he spotted something he knew to be out of place.
The bodies of the Weasley family, including those of Fleur's and Hermione's, were in a separate pile nearby.
This wasn't right. This didn't happen; he knew that this didn't happen. This was a dream. NO, this was a nightmare. He needed to wake up and reassure himself that those he knew had lived were still alive. But his body wouldn't wake up.
He saw movement out of the corner of his eye and he turned to see what it was. He felt his stomach lurch at the sight before him. The guilt he held began to deepen and bubble up to the surface. There had been a reason he made the decision he had. She was the one person he needed to be safe and survive this war. There was no world for him if she wasn't in it.
His Ginny was pulled tight against Voldemort's chest, a wand pressed to her neck. But she wasn't fighting; she seemed resigned to her fate.
"Surrender, Potter!" said the cruel high voice that regularly haunted his nightmares, penetrating them yet again. "You have no reason to fight anymore!"
"NO! NEVER! I will not surrender!"
"Let's see if this shall change your mind then!"
He watched as his mortal enemy pushed the love of his life away from him and directly pointed his wand at her. He knew what words were about to come and there was nothing he could do to stop what was about to happen.
"AVADA KEDAVRA!"
A jet of green light shot directly towards Ginny and he could only watch helplessly from across the hall as the spell connected with her chest. As it hit, his vision became blinded as the room filled with a bright green light.
Then everything went black.
Harry woke suddenly as he shot up from where he had been laying. His nightmare had left him breathing heavily, sweating profusely and his heart was racing. This had been the worst one he'd had tonight and he was now feeling exhausted from the intensity of it and the lack of sleep.
He looked over at the clock on his bedside table and saw it was only three in the morning. He knew he wasn't going to be able to get back to sleep any time soon. The fear of having more nightmares was too much for him.
He just wished Ginny had been allowed to come home earlier than the morning of the anniversary.
Making a calculated decision, he pulled out his magical mirror from the drawer of his bedside table and held it in front of his face.
"Ginny Weasley," he whispered, his voice feeling hoarse from his screams that had accompanied his nightmares. He silently thanked himself for remembering to throw up a silencing charm on the bedroom.
"Harry?" a weary voice asked as his girlfriend's face swam into view.
"I'm sorry, baby. Did I wake you?" he asked concerned.
"No, I've barely slept tonight. Are you ok?"
Harry smiled sadly as he saw the worry and compassion in Ginny's eyes.
"No," he simply replied.
"Nightmares?"
Harry could only nod in response as the tears began to stream down his face.
"Do you want me to come home?" his girlfriend asked compassionately.
This was not the first time they had communicated with each other via the mirrors in the middle of the night. Both were prone to nightmares, but they had eased considerably over the past few months. However, in the week leading up to the first anniversary of the final battle, they had intensified for Harry. He didn't want to come across as needy and desperate, but in comparison to the previous nights, he honestly didn't think he could go back to sleep without her by his side.
"I need you, Ginny," he said in a voice that made him sound years younger than he was.
Ginny's heart broke for him at his desperate plea. She had expected that the anniversary would be hard on him. In all honesty, she knew it would always be hard on him, considering his part in the final battle. She had already packed the handful of items she would need for the next couple of days, so she was ready to leave. She just hoped that Professor McGonagall would be sympathetic to her idea.
"Baby, go downstairs and make yourself a Hot Chocolate," she told him as she manoeuvred herself out of bed. "I'm on my way."
"Thank you, baby. I love you."
"I love you too, Harry."
Twenty minutes later, Ginny was stood in the Headmistress' office, after having quickly dressed and thrown a couple of last minute items in her bag.
"What can I do for you, Miss Weasley?" Professor McGonagall asked as she came into the office, concerned as to why she had been roused from her bed in the middle of the night.
"It's Harry, Professor. I need to go home now, rather than first thing in the morning," Ginny quickly explained. "I know I am asking for something that is not usually allowed, but I need to be there for him now."
The Headmistress softened her face at the mention of one of her favourite former students.
"Of course, Miss Weasley," she agreed immediately, allowing Ginny to let out a breath she had not realised she had been holding. "The Head Boy can take over your duties in the morning."
"Thank you, Professor."
"You're welcome, Miss Weasley. Please send my regards to Harry," the Headmistress responded as she lit the required fire needed for floo travel. "I'll see you both tomorrow for the memorial."
Ginny took a handful of floo powder, but before she threw it she turned back to Professor McGonagall.
"I really appreciate that you're allowing me to go now. Thank you again."
Before the professor could respond, the youngest Weasley had left via the floo for The Burrow.
Having followed his girlfriend's request, Harry was now sat with a prime view of the fireplace with a mug of hot chocolate. He felt awful, exhausted and weak, but the idea of returning to bed before Ginny arrived was inconceivable to him.
The floo flared to life all of sudden and the person he had waited for stepped out. The moment their eyes met, Harry felt like he would finally be able to relax. As Ginny moved across to him, he placed his mug down and pulled her onto his lap, burying his face into her neck.
"Thank you for coming home," he whispered.
"I'll do anything for you, Harry," she whispered back as she ran a hand soothingly through his hair. "Professor McGonagall understood without the need to ask why you needed me home."
Harry lifted his face in surprise. "She did?"
"She cares about you, Harry. Had it been anyone else, I highly doubt she would have let them leave."
"Well, she may have let Hermione leave, if it was Ron."
"Oh, no!" Ginny gasped. "I forgot to leave her note about me coming home early."
Harry chuckled. He wasn't entirely sure why he was laughing at his girlfriend's mistake, but it felt good to do so. Ginny, on the other hand, couldn't understand what she had said that was so funny to him.
"I'm sorry," Harry apologised as he fought for control over his laughter. "I've no idea why I am laughing. It was just funny for some reason."
Harry's laugh, to Ginny, was infectious and just as a giggle escaped her own lips, an image of Hermione freaking out over her not being in the dorm sprung to mind, making her laugh even harder.
"Thank you," Harry said once they managed to calm themselves. "I really needed that."
"I'm glad I could cheer you up," Ginny responded as she stood and held out her hand to her boyfriend. "Let's go to bed and get some sleep. It's going to be a long day tomorrow."
As they curled up in bed, Harry thought about how lucky he was to have such an amazing, compassionate and beautiful girlfriend. He knew he would never have got through the past year without her and it was because of her that he knew he would survive tomorrow. He was certain, despite what he had told her, that he would be proposing to her sooner rather than later.
"I love you, Ginny Weasley," he whispered as he felt sleep beginning to claim him once again.
"I love you too, Harry Potter."
"Hey, Fred."
It was mid-morning of May 2nd, one year to the day since the Battle of Hogwarts. The extended Weasley family had made the trip together to visit the grave of the one family member they had lost on that day. Each member of the family had taken their turn to speak privately to his grave and now it was Harry's turn, having waited till the end. Ginny and George were nearby, waiting for him so they could return to The Burrow.
"It's been a year since we lost you," Harry said as a tear slipped down his cheek. "I'm certain you are having a great time wherever it is you are. Chances are you have met up with Sirius and Remus and hopefully you have met my dad and are having the time of your life playing pranks with the Marauders."
He paused as he looked over to where Ginny and George stood talking.
"If it had been anyone else, I don't think we would have made it through the grief," Harry continued. "But then again, I had your sister to support me. She misses you so much. I just don't think it has hit her just how much she does. It probably won't until we get married and she realises you will not be able to be there on our wedding day."
Harry used his sleeve to wipe away the tears that were building up in his eyes.
"Thank you for coming that night and fighting alongside me. I'm sorry you had to die for us to secure our freedom."
Harry got up and stared at the headstone for a second, before walking away and back over to Ginny and George.
Harry and Ginny watched from a short distance as Andromeda and Teddy visited the graves of Remus and Tonks.
"How are you doing?" Ginny quietly asked.
Harry wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. "I'm doing ok at the moment. Not so sure I'll be ok at the end of today though."
"I'll tell you what we'll do," Ginny said thoughtfully. "Once we get back from the memorial, no matter how early it is, we'll go and spend the rest of the day curled up in bed together. Just you and me, no distractions."
"That sounds good to me, baby," Harry before pressing a kiss to her temple.
It was then that they noticed Andromeda was heading towards them as she carried an excitable Teddy who had just spotted his godparents.
"Dada!" the little boy cried as he held his arms out to his godfather, who in turn promptly took him.
Harry held Teddy close as a tear slipped from his eye as he heard the name his godson had used for him.
"Can I have a moment alone?" Harry asked as he handed Teddy over to Ginny.
"Take you all the time you need, Harry," Andromeda responded. "We're not due at Hogwarts for another couple of hours."
The black haired wizard could only nod in acknowledgment before he walked over to his friends' graves. He knelt down in front of them and took in their names on the headstones for a moment before speaking.
"Remus. Tonks," he said solemnly. "I…..I don't even know what to say. Of all the deaths in the final battle, yours hit me the hardest. It isn't fair that Teddy has to grow up without you."
Harry turned and looked at the little boy in question. He was currently being held by his godmother, giggling as she tickled him.
"I'm so honoured that you chose me to be his godfather," Harry carried on. "I love him so much, but I can't help but feel at times that I'm replacing you. I know I'm not though. It's just… it hurts to hear him call me Dada when it should be you, Remus, who is being called that."
Harry reached out and touched the headstone with his former professor's name on.
"I promise to take good care of Teddy," Harry whispered. "I'll make sure you'll be proud of him and that he'll be proud of you. To be honest, I am already proud of him myself. He brings happiness to wherever he is. I really do wish you two could be here with him."
Harry stood up and whispered a goodbye. Steeling himself for what was to come, he made his way back to the little family he had formed.
The Great Hall of Hogwarts was more sombre than it had been in recent months as people gathered to attend the memorial of the final battle. Black banners hung in place of the normal house banners reflecting the mood of many, including that of Harry's. Unknown to most in attendance, plans were in place to present the Order of Merlin to those who had played a significant part within the war, including those who had given their lives in the process. It had been agreed that this part of the ceremony had to be kept quiet if they were to succeed in giving Harry an award they knew he felt he did not deserve, even if everyone else felt that he did.
Silence fell as the Minister for Magic took to the stage.
"Good Afternoon, my fellow wizards and witches," said the low voice of Kingsley Shacklebolt, through the use of an Amplifying Charm. "Before we begin this ceremony, I would like us to have a minute's silence for those who fell during both Wizarding Wars."
Harry immediately bowed his head in respect, closed his eyes and kept a tight hold of Ginny's hand. Then he began to think of all those he had lost as a result of Voldemort and his need for power.
He thought of his parents, who'd given their lives so that he could live.
He thought of Cedric Diggory, the first of many unnecessary deaths with the return of Lord Voldemort.
He thought of his godfather, who had been robbed of his life by false claims, but had taken so many risks to be there for his godson.
He thought of his former Headmaster, who had arranged his own death after having done as much as he could to make sure Harry was prepared for what was to come.
He thought of Hedwig, his faithful owl and friend.
He thought of Mad Eye Moody, giving his life the only way he knew how, in combat.
He thought of Dobby, the over excitable free house elf, who had given his life to save Harry and his friends.
He thought of Fred Weasley, ripped away in his prime with the ghost of his last smile on his face.
He thought of Remus and Tonks, who'd become new parents barely weeks before they died.
He thought of Colin Creevey, who had answered the call to fight, despite having been in hiding because of his blood status.
Too many lives taken, all so he could fulfil his destiny. The guilt that had lingered just below the surface for the past few months began to overflow and consume him once again.
"It's not your fault, Harry," a warm voice from beside him said, bringing him back to his surroundings.
As Harry became aware of his surroundings yet again, he realised that Kingsley had begun addressing the crowd and that tears had begun to fall down his own face. He turned to look at Ginny, whose compassionate brown eyes met his guilt filled and heartbroken green ones head on. He was grateful for her presence beside him and even more so when she reached up to gently wipe away his tears.
Ginny was the only reason he had not fled Hogwarts yet. He had a deep seeded desperation to run, but he had promised himself that no matter how tough it would be for him to be at the memorial, he would be there for his girlfriend as she dealt with her own grief. Plus, Kingsley had made it clear that his presence was expected and that it was mandatory whether he liked it or not.
Harry could only concentrate on his girlfriend as the memorial wore on. All words that were spoken, he ignored. The more he concentrated on Ginny, the more the names of the fallen were drowned out and the less there was of the guilt eating him up inside.
"Now to what I hope will be a happier part of our memorial."
Kingsley's words made Harry come out of his daze.
"Today, I wish to award on behalf of the Wizengamot, a number of Order of Merlin's to those heroes who fought against Lord Voldemort and his Death Eaters throughout the Second Wizarding War."
Harry straightened up as the crowd applauded at the Minister's words. He knew it meant he would be forced to accept one, but he was intrigued to see who else had been awarded the Order of Merlin. He knew Kingsley would have fought for those who would have been denied otherwise.
"We begin with presenting the Order of Merlin to those who gave their lives to ensure our freedom," Kingsley announced. "Many of those who did so were still in the prime of their life and they willingly risked their lives to do what was right, rather than what was easy. For this, we commend them and they will always have our gratitude."
Harry joined in the applause as designated family members collected the medals on the behalf of their deceased. He even managed to crack a smile as George and Dennis went up on behalf of their brothers. However, he never expected to be collecting an award on behalf of anyone himself.
"To collect on behalf of Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks-Lupin," Kingsley said. "I would like to invite Harry Potter and his godson, Teddy Lupin to the stage."
Harry froze for a second, before he was nudged by Ginny to get up. He did so, quickly taking his godson from his Grandmother, who in turn nodded her acceptance of him being the one to collect the award. Teddy, excited to be in his godfather's arms, changed his hair to match, much to the amusement of those in attendance.
"They would be so proud of you and Teddy right now," Kingsley whispered in Harry's ear as he gave them the boxed medals. Harry could only respond with a sad smile as he pulled his godson closer to him for comfort.
"Before Harry leaves the stage," Kingsley addressed the crowd. "I wish to present another Order of Merlin that I wish for him to collect on behalf of its recipient."
Harry racked his brain as to whom the Minister was referring, but he came up blank.
"Harry's godfather, Sirius Black," Kingsley continued to the astonishment of Harry and many of those in the hall, "spent twelve years in Azkaban for crimes he did not commit, to only then breakout in order to protect the godson he loved deeply. Three years later, he gave his life in a duel against Bellatrix Lestrange when he rushed to protect his godson in a fight with Death Eaters at the Department of Mysteries. I am happy to not only award the Order of Merlin to Sirius Black, but also to announce that he has been fully pardoned of the crimes he was falsely accused of."
Harry sagged in relief at the announcement, knowing his godfather would be remembered now for the right reasons rather than for being a mass murderer.
"Thank you," Harry whispered when Kingsley handed him yet another boxed medal, before he turned and left the stage.
Harry retook his seat next to Ginny, who took the three boxed medals from him so he could hold onto Teddy closely as silent tears fell down his face. As he tried to calm the emotions he was feeling, he blocked the words Kingsley was now saying. That was until he heard a gasp of astonishment from the crowd, causing him to look up and refocus.
"This was a decision that was fought over by Wizengamot," Harry heard the Minister say. "But overwhelming evidence has shown that Professor Severus Snape fought for the Light as a double agent, risking his life every time he met with the Dark Lord. It was thanks to him that a crucial piece of information was passed to Harry Potter during the final battle that allowed for our guaranteed victory."
Harry smiled, despite the whispers of shock that were scattered throughout the Great Hall.
"It is for this reason," Kingsley continued. "That I am happy to award him the Order of Merlin First Class which is to be collected by our current Headmistress. It is also my honour to announce, keeping with tradition, that his portrait will be added to the Head's Office."
Those who knew the former Potion Master's story clapped wildly as Professor McGonagall collected the medal. Once the applause died down, Kingsley continued once more.
"We have so many survivors who are deserving of awards here today, but due to the sheer number, we have chosen to honour just seven of them at this memorial."
Harry was certain that he was one of them and as much as he didn't want it or even thought that he deserved it, he knew he would reluctantly accept it. He knew now that this was the reason that his appearance had been made mandatory by Kingsley. However, he did cheer and applaud as he watched Molly, Luna, Neville, Ginny, Ron and Hermione all accept what he thought was their well-deserved Order Of Merlin's. He was proud of each and every one of them.
"Finally," Kingsley said as an unnatural silence fell over the hall in anticipation for the final recipient. "It gives me the greatest pleasure to award this final person. He will say he is not a hero and that he does deserve any recognition, but this is what makes him the most humble person I know. From the moment he stepped back into the Wizarding World, he found himself thrusted into the spotlight and regularly battling against the most evil of magic. He will say that he only did what he needed to do, for which we are all thankful for. But he took it one step further and willingly walked to what he thought would be his death, sacrificing himself for the greater good. Therefore, it is my greatest honour to award my friend, Harry James Potter with the Order of Merlin First Class."
Harry passed Teddy over to Ginny and reluctantly made his way back on stage.
"I know you'd rather or not," Kingsley whispered, "but could you please address the crowd?"
Harry sighed and nodded before casting the amplifying charm on himself.
"Erm… Thank you for this award," Harry said, reluctantly addressing the crowd. "I quite honestly believe that I don't deserve this as I do not, as the Minister pointed out, consider myself a hero. I just did what I had to do and I did so with the help of many people."
Harry's eyes flickered to Ginny for a moment, drawing strength from her presence.
"If I am to accept this award, then I feel it is only appropriate that I thank five of the many people who helped me accomplish what it is I am receiving this for."
Taking a deep breath, he calmed his nerves and blinked back the tears that were threatening to fall once again.
"Firstly, I would like to thank my parents, James and Lily Potter. I didn't fully understand their actions until a year ago, but they sacrificed their own lives out of their love for me so that I could live."
Harry then looked to his two best friends.
"Secondly, I would like to thank Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley, my two best friends. We may have had our disagreements at times, but you have supported me and been loyal to me since we were eleven. You have risked your lives numerous times just so I could finish my mission."
Harry moved his gaze to Ginny, who still had Teddy in her lap. She gave him that blazing look he loved so much and he felt himself relax as a result.
"Finally, I was always told that the most powerful magic in the world was love and that it would be the power I used to defeat Voldemort. Well, Professor Dumbledore was correct in telling me that. So I want to thank the most important person in my life, Ginny Weasley. You helped me understand what love actually meant and had it not been for your love, trust and support, I would not have cared if I had lived or died doing what I needed to do. You came into my life and lit it up in a way no one else had ever been able to before and in doing that you gave me every reason to end the war and to make sure I survived to enjoy the freedom that we won."
Harry knew that he had put himself out there, but in that moment, he didn't care as long as it meant Ginny knew just how much her love meant to him.
"Thank you," he finished, before removing the charm on himself and quickly moving off the stage and straight into his girlfriend's arms, ignoring the wild applause around him.
"I'm proud of how you handled yourself today," Ginny softly said as she slowly and lovingly ran a hand through Harry's messy hair.
Immediately after the memorial had ended, the couple had quickly said their goodbyes and returned to The Burrow. They were currently sitting in their darken bedroom, which only had a small candle burning for a source of light.
Harry looked up from where he had his head laid in Ginny's lap, enjoying the soothing movements she made through his hair. He gave her a shy smile. "Thanks, I think."
"I know you didn't want to be there," Ginny explained. "I didn't either if I am to be honest. But you did well by accepting those Order of Merlins and your openness in your speech amazed everyone."
"I was just being honest," Harry weakly protested.
"I know that," Ginny soothed. "What you said about me though, I think that surprised everyone. No one has really heard you talk that way about me before."
Harry sat up and pulled the red read into his arms, touching his forehead to hers and looking deep into her eyes.
"Love is what helped us win," Harry softly said. "Love is what saved me, your love to be precise. People needed to know and understand that."
Ginny couldn't respond in words. To her, there were no words that could be said. Instead, she leaned further forward and kissed him with every ounce of love she had for him.