The Little Sannin
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the related characters, I just am borrowing them for my own delusions.
Chapter 2
The Sannin, masters of the battlefield, legends amongst the ninja communities, powerful as Kage's. nothing they couldn't handle…
"OH MY GOD!" Jiraiya said staggering back from the table.
Orochimaru was across the room as if he'd teleported, a sleeved arm covering his lower face. "How could something so small, make something so foul?" the Snake Sannnin asked, his eyes watering.
Tsunade, eyes crossed and nose scrunched looked at Shizune. "Well, what are you waiting for, get the wet wipes and powder, stat!"
Shizune was frozen at the bottom of the stairs. She'd gone to get the bag from their room, the small roadside inn was empty save for them and the owner who was in the kitchen. It had been simple. Naruto needed to be changed. What lay beneath the diaper had even the legendary three backing away in terror.
"Sweet Kami, What the hell did you feed him Tsu-hime?" Jiraiya asked, the smell was beginning to wafer towards him and he was backing up. The Toad sage would later swear it was a noxious cloud that Shizune would later make into a new assault jutsu.
Tsunade seeing her apprentice frozen in place growled and grabbed the items from her and proceeded to change Naruto's diaper, granted she swore the thing should be used to break an enemy siege, but she cleaned the boy up and after securing the new diaper she kissed the gurgling baby's belly and got a laugh.
"Whose my little stink bomb, yes you are. Yes you are."
Jiraiya and Orochimaru watched their teammate talk to the baby and they shared a look. Tsunade's bravest of the brave for changing that…weapon of mass destruction, and insane for talking to a baby.
Little Anko the following morning found out that standing in front of a baby boy while changing his diaper without covering his manliness ended up asking to be peed on. Her shriek of indignation woke up Orochimaru and Jiraiya who entered the room, Rasengan in Jiraiya's hand and Kusanagi in Orochimaru's. the male Sannin were blinking sleep from their eyes and looking for the threat. Tsunade was rolling on the floor laughing and little Anko standing there with pee running down her face, a total look of revulsion on her face that only someone who'd been violated like that can have.
Shizune smiled and hid the camera away as she snuggled back under her blankets. Oh, little Naruto, you are going to have this 'family' wrapped around your finger…and I'll have the blackmail…I mean family album to prove it.
The first two years seemed to pass quickly as Jiraiya and Orochimaru learned how to change diapers, feed Naruto with a bottle and that he was a baby and couldn't mold chakra yet to begin the lessons both men thought he should learn.
Little Anko meanwhile learned how to read and write and was starting to learn basic taijutsu from her Uncle Orochi.
Momma Tsunade made sure the children ate properly, and that her male teammates weren't getting into too much trouble.
Shizune filled albums with photo evidence of Naruto's first time crawling, which set the Sannin into a panic when the baby was seen crawling towards a stranger at an inn…sadly a Tsunade packed punch, a hail of senbon needles from Shizune, a low level Rasengan (enema version) and Orochimaru's Hidden Shadow Snake Hand, left the poor man a wreck, which Anko laughed at and asked that Uncle Orochi do it again.
Naruto's first words were "Pervert, Momma, Shizi, Oro-teme and Anko No." all were recorded by Shizune in the baby journal she'd bought for her little nephew that would be filled with all his first moments.
"Perver." Naruto mocked as he looked at Jiraiya, his chubby little finger pointing at the white haired Sannin who looked shocked. As did the others, but Tsunade's cheer and picking up the little blond and kissing him for his first word.
"Tsu-hime…don't encourage him." Jiraiya said as Naruto laughed and kept saying "Perver." When he got more motor functions he would add the 'T', but for a first word, Tsunade couldn't have been prouder. When he called Tsunade "Momma." Brought a tear to the blond Sannin's eyes and she hugged her little one and kissed his face all over.
"Jiraiya, you notice the change in our hime?" Orochimaru asked as they watched the Slug Sannin with the baby.
Jiraiya nodded. "Not something I thought I'd ever see from her again after Nawaki and Dan."
The pair watched as Tsunade sang softly to their little one.
Jiraiya looked at his friend. "When did we get so soft?"
"What do you mean we dobe? You've always been soft between the ears." Orochimaru said with a grin.
"Up yours Orochi-teme."
"Oo-Eme." Naruto mocked and both looked over the fire in surprise to see Naruto pointing at Orochimaru with his little finger. Jiraiya laughed. "That's right Naruto. Orochi-teme."
Naruto would later name Shizune 'Shizi' despite the brunette's attempts to get him to change, he wouldn't.
"Anko No." was mainly due to how often the Sannin would rush off to rescue the adventurous girl and their cries of "Anko No!" to the point baby Naruto took that to mean it was her name.
"Brat." Anko said, but the others saw that her 'little brother' had her wrapped around his cherub finger despite their rough start of him peeing on her at the beginning.
The Sannin and their 'family' kept moving, never staying in one place more than a month at most.
Jiraiya's first novel of Icha Icha Paradise was a hit around Naruto's third birthday, allowing the Sannin to take the odd jobs they wanted and not what they had to in order to make ends meet.
Tsunade would gamble, but with Anko and Naruto, she never bet much and mostly did it out of habit, and she continued to live up to her nickname her bastard teammates gave her when she was a teenager. "The Legendary Sucker." Her gambling was mostly out of fun as she held Naruto in her lap and allowed him to push the buttons on the slot machines, which somehow the three year old always managed to give her winnings.
Anko, now eight to Naruto's three was getting more training from her Uncle Orochi as well as kunoichi lessons from Shizune.
"She's a girl and she will need to know all this. You can't make her into an ultimate ninja." She'd threatened Orochimaru and Jiraiya with a frying pan in one hand and a butcher knife in the other when she caught them trying to teach her advanced techniques she was no way ready for.
The first time she tried a fire style attack Orochimaru had shown her, she'd passed out, and the sight of a panicking Sannin in a small town hospital would forever be etched in the minds of the doctors and nurses as Orochimau hovered over his nieces bed, fear in his eyes as he prayed to Kami to bring her out of it alright.
After Anko had awaken, Orochimaru concentrated on blunted shuriken and her taijutsu, swearing he would wait till she was eleven for academy age before he worked with the ninjutsu's.
Shizune approved of mild Genjutsus, kawarimi and the bunshin that academy student learned. She also approved of the leaf balancing chakra exercise after getting a pair of brown eyes watering and a small girl pouting at her.
Life with the Sannin was rather normal for a 'family' on the move. They took some low rank jobs in towns they stayed in, then move on.
Things like that went on until Naruto's fifth birthday, Anko was ten when the peaceful nomadic life of the Sannin would change.
It was a cool October morning, five year old Naruto was stretching outside the tent he shared with his kaa-san. "Ero-Tou-san's not up yet." The five year old noticed. Since his fourth birthday Father Jiraiya had started him on simple exercises. "They will help you later on Naruto. Your body needs to be in shape if you ever want to learn the skills your mother, I or Orochi-teme have."
Sit ups, push ups, jogging and when the weather and location allowed, swimming. Aunt Shizi insisted I learn how to at least dog paddle.
Naruto loved the water. His mom had a hard time getting him out of it once he got in.
"Hey runt."
Naruto turned to see his sister coming out of her and their Aunt's shared tent. Like him, she was dressed for their daily morning workout. "No Ero-pop?" Anko asked looking around.
Naruto shook his head.
Anko frowned and went to the tent where her Uncle Orochi and Jiraiya stayed. She rapped on the tent pole.
"What is it?" Orochimaru's voice came out.
"Its Anko. Is Ero-pop in there?" she asked.
Orochimaru's head popped out the flap, he had half face of shaving cream with his hair tied back in a topknot. "No, he isn't." Orochimaru said, his gaze taking in the camp. Stepping out in his pants and a towel over his shoulder, he wiped his face.
"Naruto, go wake your mother. Anko, get Shizune up." The Snake sannin said.
"What's wrong Uncle?" Anko asked.
"Jiraiya may be a pervert, and lazy at times, but he would never leave the camp, especially with the two of you expecting him." Orochimaru said grabbing a shirt from his tent and grabbing his weapons pouch and sword. The Sannin never left the children unsupervised for training, and they never left the camp unprotected like it was now.
"Orochi?" Tsunade asked coming out of her tent with her dressing gown as she tied the sash.
"The dobe's missing." Orochimaru said. "I'm going to look for him. I didn't want to leave the camp without someone here for the children."
Tsunade nodded. "If he's off peeping somewhere I am going to show him my newest detriment to perverts everywhere."
Orochimaru nearly smiled. I would agree, but Jiraiya is never irresponsible when it comes to the children. If we were both out here he might be, but when he's supposed to be training them, he's actually a responsible adult…and when in Kami's name did that happen? The Snake Sannin thought as he slipped from their simple camp by the river, his eyes looking for any sign of Jiraiya's passing, or someone that didn't belong there.
Orochimaru was a hundred yards away from the camp when the net trap scooped him up. He felt weak and saw it was designed to sap chakra.
Oh, no…Tsu-hime…protect… darkness claimed him.
AN: The title doesn't mean that Naruto will be Sannin, but its how his new family views him. Anko as his sister will be fun as they get older. I am designing a big bad to give the Sannin and their 'family' hell in the coming years. They will return to Konoha. I prefer the graduating age of the academy to be 16. Also with Sarutobi's name, I've seen dozens of suggestions. Wikipedia never listed it, so I made my own (yes I used different ones in different stories.) I am glad so many like this idea. I wasn't sure when I started it, but its building steam in my head, along with the others. YES, I have found a somewhat balance between videogames, my girlfriend and writing. (so far. But with Grand Theft Auto IV coming, and some damn good PS2 games still on the horizon we shall see.)