Don't get confused. This starts before the ending of the 37. I just really wanted to end it there. So, I hope you all like this chapter. I've envisioning maybe 2 or 3 more, I think before the end of LKG. I might take a break before starting AINE, though. Don't really feel like talking much right now, so. Later.
Chapter 38:
I entered the doctor's office with quite a bit of fear. I was sick again, and I wasn't sure what was wrong with me. Shane tried to reassure me that there probably wasn't anything wrong. I didn't really understand his immense belief in that statement. But I trusted him and fought my nerves and went anyway.
"Mrs. Grey, back so soon?" Dr. Masis greeted as he came in.
"I'm getting sick again. Every morning I wake up vomiting. I think my anti-depressants are making me sick. I mean, they're working, but…" My explanation of why I was there was cut off by the doctor's laughter. "What's funny, Doctor?" I asked slightly peeved.
"Mitchie. Tell me all of your symptoms." He requested. "Humor me, please, so we can verify what's wrong."
"Well, I can smell really well, my chest hurt, my stomach has been cramping, I wake up vomiting and I'm nauseas a lot …" I trailed off as I caught sight of Dr. Masis's growing smiling.
"Mrs. Grey," He began. "I do believe you're pregnant."
"There's no way." I said in disbelief.
"Forgive me for getting too personal, but I highly doubt that you and Shane didn't have sex at all while he was home, much less used protection. I saw the face he made the day you were here."
"He did." I replied. "He wasn't happy about it, but he did. There's no way I'm pregnant. The only time we had sex without protection I was on birth control."
"Birth control you weren't taking properly." Dr. Masis reminded me. "It's quite possible."
"How can I possibly be showing signs of it already? Doesn't it not start for a few weeks? Like a month at least?" I still wasn't convinced.
"It's quite possible, Mitchie." He laughed. "Please, just do the blood work, and then if that's not it, we'll sit down and really discuss what this could be." He smiled. "But it's not your anti-depressants. I can assure you of that much. You're on the only anti-depressant that has no known side effects on pregnant woman and their fetus, by the way."
"Why?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.
He smirked. "I had a hunch you might become pregnant in the near future. It's dangerous to take a pregnant woman off of her anti-depressants but it can also be dangerous to the fetus if she stays on them. So I recommended that one."
"Riiight. But I'm not pregnant." I replied politely. He just continued to smile as he left. He sent a nurse in to do the blood work.
I went home in a bad mood. Dr. Masis was off his rocker, I was certain. I sought out Caitlyn quickly. "There's no freaking way I'm pregnant." I stated when I did find her.
"What?" She asked looking up at me with confusion. "Where did that come from?"
"Dr. Masis has this notion that I'm pregnant." I huffed sitting down.
"He might not be wrong." Caitlyn sighed. "You seem slightly pregnant."
"Last time I seemed pregnant, I wasn't. I'm not getting my hopes up just have them crushed." I snapped.
Caitlyn's eyes grew wide. "Hopes up?" She gasped smiling widely. "No way. You want a baby?" She was in pure disbelief.
"What?" I asked before realizing what I had said. "No, that's not what I meant-"
"No, you want a baby. What brought this on?" She smirked knowingly as she cut me off.
I shrugged, really confused at the moment. "I don't know. I guess I was slightly disappointed the last time. I mean, I was relieved, but I was… disappointed, too. No, Cait, this is bad. I can't be pregnant." I began pacing. "No matter how much I wouldn't mind being pregnant, I can't be. Shane and I can't handle this right now. Oh god, Cait, what am I going to do?" I started freaking out more than I already was. Talking about this seemed to make everything worse. "Oh god, oh god, oh god." I sat on my bed almost hyperventilating.
Caitlyn chuckled and called Anastasia to come over while trying to calm me down. When Anastasia arrived she took one look at Caitlyn and I and just stopped moving. I was crying like an idiot while Caitlyn was trying not to laugh.
"Okay, what the hell?" Anastasia asked, seriously confused.
"Mitchie thinks she's pregnant, but thinks it's a bad thing." Caitlyn explained.
"It is a bad thing, Cait." I glared at her.
Anastasia sat on the other side of me. "How is it bad? You're married aren't you? Unless…" Anastasia shifted uncomfortably next to me. "… unless it's not Shane's…"
I gasped, clutching my arms around my stomach. "How could you say such a thing!" I demanded. "Of course it's Shane's."
"Then how is it bad?" Anastasia asked again.
"I'm still in college, he's still a pop star. Follow me here, college student plus pop star equals bad parents." I exasperated.
"You think too much. You don't even know for a fact yet." Caitlyn decided.
"And? I was blind to begin with, but I don't think I'm that stupid. Dr. Masis is probably right. The morning sickness? The smelling? My boobs growing? How could I be so blind. What am I going to do then?" I demanded.
"You're going to tell your husband and be happy." Anastasia said firmly.
"You guys just don't get it." I sighed in frustration as I stood up.
"Because there's nothing to get. You're scared. Just admit that so we can move on to the reality of this time there is a significant chance you're pregnant." Caitlyn practically yelled.
I half screamed in frustration. "I don't want to be pregnant right now." I half cried.
"Well, if you are, the hardest part of your term would be during the summer, when you're not in class." Anastasia offered, trying to cheer me up. It didn't work too well, as I ended up glaring at her instead.
"Why don't we not think about this until we know for a fact?" Caitlyn offered. "Then we can legitimately freak out, Shane included."
"Fine." I sighed, too tired to fight anymore.
Caitlyn and Anastasia went back to the doctor with me the next week to hear my results. Dr. Masis walked into the room with a smug smile on his face. "Congratulations, Mrs. Grey. You're pregnant." He handed me the results from the blood-work, along with the numbers of a few Ob-Gyn's. "Do you have a gynecologist?" He asked.
"I hate her." I replied.
He chuckled. "Take a look at these then." He suggested.
I sighed as he walked back out of the room. Caitlyn and Anastasia looked expectantly at me. "Fine. When we get outside." I relented. They'd been pressuring me all week to call Shane literally as soon as I found out if I was.
I was pacing outside, listening to the phone ringing. With each passing ring, my heart rose higher into my throat. Shane managed to answer on the last ring. "Hey, ba-" He answered.
Cutting him off, I blurted my news before I chickened out. "I'm pregnant." I winced in anticipation of his response.
"I know." He replied simply. His voice couldn't have sounded happier, believe it or not.
"I'm sorry, what?" The wrong person in this conversation was stunned stupid.
"I know." He said again. "I just had a feeling with the smelling and your chest. And then you started throwing up." His voice was low as he explained.
"Why are you whispering?" I asked.
"Because I don't want to tell Nate and Jason yet. I'm sure you've told the girls, but I want to tell them with you. And I don't want anyone else overhearing." He explained.
"Oh." I said still stunned. "Oh and another question!" I exclaimed. "Why didn't you tell me?!" I yelled at him.
He chuckled. "I wanted you to figure it out. I'm honestly surprised you didn't."
I sighed slightly peeved. "A heads up would have been nice when you realized I wasn't going to."
"You're the woman. You should be able to figure this out." He laughed.
"I'm going to hang up on you now." I warned.
"Love you!" He called out as I hung up the phone.
I was stunned honestly. I did not think Shane would have guessed I was pregnant before I had any idea. As I finally turned back to the girls, they were staring at me in confusion.
"What was that?" Caitlyn asked.
I huffed. "He knew." I pouted. "How did he know before we did?"
"Before you did." Anastasia corrected. "We had our own suspicions."
I glared at them for the rest of the ride home. Why had no one thought to clue me in on the fact that they thought I was pregnant? Was I really that caught up in my own world that I didn't notice something like being pregnant?
By the time classes had started again, we'd gone to some pretty lengthy extremes to make sure no one knew I was pregnant. Poor Caitlyn had to deal with my throwing up in our room into a garbage can every morning. Faith's room and our room had music playing 24-7 to avoid anyone hearing said vomiting. I avoided the dining halls during breakfast as coffee made me sick.
Nate and Jason were still none the wiser either. I felt bad not telling them, but I really wanted to tell them in person. I agreed with Shane on that much. But the girls and I had a plan. We'd be going to England for Valentine's Day, where the guys were doing a special show.
But the days between were dragging on. I still had 3 weeks to wait, and the 3 that had already passed almost killed me. Between going to see Dr. Toledo and my classes, not to mention being pregnant and hiding it, I was slowly losing it. Not the baby or my sanity! But my strength was being fade, both physically and emotionally. The whole ordeal was just draining. I just needed a break to rest and relax.
I laid in Shane's bed at the Grey house, not explaining why I was there on Wednesday night when I had class in the morning. No one in the house knew I was pregnant. I wanted to tell them with Shane. I was happy that the room smelled more like Shane again. After three weeks there, it was bound to up his scent again. Jacob was happy to see me as well. He laid curled up at my feet like always.
A random knock came to the door and Kevin peeked his head in the door. "Mitchie, you okay?" He asked.
"Come here." I requested, sitting up and patting the bed next to me.
He smiled and did so. "What's up?"
"Can I tell you a secret?" I asked. He nodded in slight confusion. "I feel like crap."
He frowned slightly. "Why?" He asked.
"Because… of multiple reasons, really." I replied, leaning forward on my knees. "Physically, I'm just having trouble handling it." He opened his mouth to interrupt, but I kept going. "Emotionally… god, I'm a mess. Guilt sucks." I pouted.
"What is it? And why do you feel guilty?" He asked, placing a hand on my arm.
I shook my head. "I can't tell you what it is yet. You're brother might be upset. I think he wants to tell you." I sighed. "But I told him over the phone. And I should have told him in person."
Thinking the worst, Kevin became alarmed. "Told him what? What did you do?" He demanded.
I smiled at him. "Nothing bad." I promised.
"Can you tell me, and we just won't tell him?" He asked.
I shook my head slowly no, then paused. "Will you act surprised when we tell you when we comes home?" I asked.
He crossed his heart. "Promise."
"No! You have to say the whole thing!" I giggled slightly.
He huffed but did it anyway. "Cross my heart and hope to die… I don't remember the rest, sorry." He shrugged.
"Fine." I leaned in even more and whispered. "I'm pregnant."
His reaction was not what I was expecting. "Mitchie…" He sighed. "Are you sure? Last time you thought you were-"
"No! This time I am." I laughed. "I promise. I went to the doctor and everything. Remember how sick I was during Christmas?" I asked.
He nodded. "Yeah… that was morning sickness?" I nodded. "Wow. Just… wow. So, I'm going to be an uncle." He smiled softly at first, but eventually it broke out into a huge grin. "Wow."
"I'm scared." I admitted.
"Why?" He asked concerned.
I sighed. "Because I'm just… afraid of how this is going to work out with me in school and Shane still making music. I just, I don't know." I leaned forward and laid my head against Kevin's shoulder. "I'm only 18. This is why people wait until they get married." He wrapped his arms around me comfortingly, rubbing my back.
"But you have an amazing husband. My brother would give up everything to take care of you, you know that right?" He spoke soothingly.
"That's what scares me the most, Kev. He says we'll work it out when he comes home. What is home, Kevin? Your house? The apartment in NY? Where are he and I and the baby going to live?" I felt tears welling up as I grew frustrated.
"I don't have those answers. Have you talked to the girls at all?" He asked.
I wiped angrily at the tears. I really hated being all emotional. "Not about this. I made the mistake of saying to Cait that I didn't want to get my hopes up about being pregnant just for it to not be true again, and now she's convinced that I want this baby."
Kevin pulled back from me quickly. "What do you mean? You don't want this baby?" He questioned.
"I do!" I replied instantly. "It's a matter of it being improbable that's the problem. It's the worst timing ever." I sighed.
Kevin smirked slightly at me. "Ya know, Shane came at the worst possible time for our parents." He reminded me.
I smiled. "You're right, Kev." I agreed. "How do you do that? Make everything make sense so easily? Shane does, too, but he rambles a bit to make that point."
He shrugged. "Skills." He replied simply.
I smiled, suddenly feeling very much relieved about the whole situation. Kevin was right: Shane's parents were not anticipating him when he came. He was almost a burden when he was born, but everything was fine until the twins came. Even then, they still made it work. Somehow, they always managed to make everything suffice. I knew Shane and I were in a much better position than his parents were and that we could make everything work, too.
I was musing over the baby two weeks later when a sudden thought came to me. Knowing Shane was on stage at the time, I dialed Kevin. I found it easier to talk to him about baby things than the girls. They made me feel a tad stupid at times, yet Kevin didn't. Mostly, he just listened and then calmed my fears afterward.
As soon as Kevin answered, I bombarded him with questions. "What are the chances of me having twins?!" I demanded.
He chuckled. "Pretty slim." He replied. "They'd most likely be identical if you had them because only Nicky has the possibility to conceive twins because of our genetics. It gets passed down through Shane and I, but because we aren't female, it doesn't matter in our children's conception. Any daughters we have would have the possibility of twins, though."
I sighed in relief. "I don't think I could have handled twins." I admitted. Then curiosity peaked and I asked, "How do you know that anyway?"
"Health class, 8th grade." He stated. "Because we're twins, our teacher made special emphasis for Nicky and me. Usually, it gets glossed over."
"Oooh. Okay, well, now that that freak out is done, I'll talk to you later. I have a paper to finish." I replied.
"You're supposed to be doing a paper and you're off in lala land about the baby?" Kevin chuckled.
"Yup." I smiled brightly. "I really need to get this done if I want to be able to go see Shane for Valentine's Day."
"Okay, okay. Bye, Mitch." He laughed.
"Bye, Kev! Love you!" I hung up and resumed my paper. My evil-spinster-esque teacher had assigned a rather irritating assignment that was due on Valentine's Day -I'm convinced she's a sadist. Or just lonely and bitter.
Friday afternoon, I took my paper with me to her office hours. "Professor Miller?" I asked, knocking on his door.
"Michaela, what can I do for you?" She asked, looking me up and down with narrowed, appraising eyes.
"I wanted to turn my paper in early. I won't be in class on Monday." I informed, pulling out my paper.
"Oh." Her jaw ticked. "Did you read your syllabus, Ms. Grey?" She asked.
"Yes. That's why I wanted to talk to you-" She cut me off.
"It clearly states that you have to be in class to turn in any formal papers. Turning it in early due to an anticipated missed class will cost you a deduction on your grade."
"I'm not just skipping class. I'm going to be in England." I argued.
"Because your husband is famous does not mean you can simply skip class to go gallivanting in Europe." She reprimanded.
"I'm not gallivanting-"
"What, pray tell, is so important in England, Mrs. Grey?" She demanded.
"My husband." I replied with a voice as cold as ice. "Excuse me, Professor Miller, but I don't see why you're being so narrow minded about this. Instead of letting me explain myself, you've continuously cut me off from doing so. At least let me say my piece before you yell at me." Her jaw ticked again, but she waved her hand for me to continue. I sighed. "Shane and I just found out some… interesting personal news that I had to share with him over the phone. It's really not the type of news you should share over the phone." My eyes traveled her desk and saw a picture of her when pregnant with a man next to her. "How did you tell him you were pregnant?" I asked, curiously changing the subject a bit.
Her eyes narrowed. "Over the phone. I went to college on the other side of the country, so it was the only option at the time." She explained. "Why?"
"Then you should understand that some news needs to be shared in person. He already knows said news, but I need to see him. And what better time than Valentine's Day?"
Professor Miller sighed in resignation. "It's not fair for me to give special dispensation, Mrs. Grey."
"Then maybe you need to adjust your syllabus for special dispensations." I suggested.
She held out her hand for my paper. I happily handed it over. "Don't think you'll get away with this again, Mrs. Grey." She warned.
"He'll be home soon enough." I sighed. "Thank you, so much, Professor. I truly appreciate this."
"If this paper is not an A worthy paper, you will receive that deduction, Michaela."
"Absolutely. I completely agree with that." I agreed and thanked her again.
After a nervous, excited, agonizingly long weekend, the girls and I were packed and anxiously waiting to leave and see our boys. Sunday afternoon we were boarding a plane to England. I could not wait to see Shane again and was quite curious as to what his reaction to seeing me pregnant would be. I was only ten weeks along, but Caitlyn and Anastasia claimed I glowed. Whatever that meant.
Surely, this was going to be a trip to remember, I was sure.Tada. You know you love me. And Shane's in person reaction will make up for his over the phone reaction, otays? And, Allison, you know what scene is coming up. 'Dumbasses.' Haha.