Three times when Sasuke didn't go home, and one time when he did

A/N: Thank you so much for the feedback. I'm glad you're enjoying, and i hope you'll keep liking this.

In front of Sasuke, the lake stood still, few ripples breaking the surface of the water. It mirrored the sky perfectly, and the fluffy clouds drifted twice, above and below at the same time in perfect synchronization, like a slow dance without music. Night was slowly falling and the sky darkened, and with it, the lake.

Sasuke had been sitting on the pier for hours. He liked it here. It was where his father had acknowledged him, where he had taught him, just days before…it had happened. He liked coming here after training. The other children played not very far away, he knew, but their games held no interest for him, and neither did they. They wouldn't understand why he stayed out until twilight on most nights, or why he liked to sit here. He knew they talked about him behind his back; he didn't care. He wasn't part of them anymore. It was lonely, sometimes, but it had to be for the best.

He sat up straight suddenly, his senses warning him of the change before he was even fully aware of it. Behind him, up on the pathway, someone was walking. They made an awful lot of noise, kicking at small pebbles with every step. Not a shinobi, then. And the strides seemed rather short… a child, maybe?

Sasuke turned his head just enough to see who was up there, and was pleased to discover he was right. Pleased, and a little annoyed when he saw who it was. Naruto grimaced at him. Sasuke frowned; what an idiot. He looked away, his eyes returning to the lake, unwilling to give any hint that Naruto would be welcome to join him. The noisy steps continued as Naruto walked on, alone as Sasuke was. He was probably going home, and taking his time getting there. He would probably understand why Sasuke was sitting on the pier alone. Somehow, the thought was comforting, and as he waited for the night, Sasuke found himself smiling.

…

"These are only a few of my experiments, of course." Orochimaru's fingers ghosted over the too pale face of something that wasn't truly a child anymore. He looked up at Sasuke, his eyes searching for a reaction.

Sasuke struggled to remain perfectly still even when every fiber of his being wanted to turn away. He also forced himself not to clench his fists as he wanted so much to do. Any hint of what he felt would be dangerous.

"I see," he managed to say, keeping his voice as blank as possible.

"So, Sasuke-kun?" Orochimaru prompted, apparently disappointed by his reaction. "What do you think? Don't you want to know what I'm trying to do with these?"

Sasuke turned his eyes to his so-called teacher. "Will it help me become stronger?"

Orochimaru's frown answered before he did. "Well, not exactly, but—"

"Will you teach me any more today?"

Behind him, Kabuto hissed a warning, as always outraged on Orochimaru's behalf that Sasuke wasn't showing him proper respect. Orochimaru, on the other hand, didn't seem to be offended, merely annoyed that Sasuke wasn't interested in his games.

"Not today. I have other things to do."

Sasuke nodded and turned away. Any other time, he would have protested and reminded Orochimaru of their deal. At the moment, however, he was content to go back to his room. He walked there at a normal pace even though his stomach roiled, bile rising with each step. Only when he had closed his door did he abandon all pretense and rushed to the small bathroom where he proceeded to vomit everything he had eaten that day. As tight as he shut his eyes, he could still see Orochimaru's experiments in his mind, and he knew already that they would stay with him for a long time, if not forever.

When he had nothing left to vomit, he washed his mouth and splashed cold water over his face. He had left Konoha four months earlier, and had never wanted to go back as badly as he did now. Could anything be worth what he was being shown? What he was a part of, if only by allowing it to keep happening now that he knew?

He straightened and looked at himself in the mirror. Only when he noticed his eyes' color did he realize he had unconsciously activated the sharingan. He wondered when he had done it; had Orochimaru or Kabuto noticed?

He forced himself to calm down, and as his eyes returned to their normal color, he pushed away his fantasy of leaving. He had known from the moment he had come what kind of man Orochimaru was. He couldn't give up now. He wouldn't give up.

As much as he wanted to, he wouldn't go back home.

…

Sasuke's eyes were wide open, but he could see nothing. His body was bruised and battered, his arms numb from the ropes binding him, but he could feel nothing. Madara was still talking, but he couldn't hear a word anymore.

A lie. All of it was a lie. It had to be. He refused to believe that there was even a sliver of truth to Madara's revelations. It was all just a lie.

Wasn't it?

It was so tempting to believe him… So tempting, and so horrifying to finally understand Itachi's actions. Part of Sasuke was tempted to believe, wanted to know that he owed his life to his brother's love rather than to cold calculation. Another part was horrified to think that everything he had thought to be true, everything that had guided him for so long, had been a lie.

Lies. Too many webs of lies. How was he supposed to untangle them and figure out the truth for himself?

One thing was certain; he had kept at the back of his mind the hope that he'd be able to return to Konoha when he was done hunting Itachi. He didn't think he could do it anymore. He couldn't go home until he started seeing more clearly. He wasn't even sure he had a home anymore.

…

Already, Sasuke was tearing off the tape that barred the entrance of the Uchiha district.

"I'm just a bit early, that's all."

Without another word, he stepped into the quiet street. Naruto watched him go, then looked around him and back. He couldn't see Sai, but he had no doubt that the ANBU was close by, watching their every movement. Maybe he wouldn't tell Tsunade about the kissing – not that Naruto cared either way – but he would definitely report this. Sighing, Naruto followed Sasuke, easily catching up with him. If the old woman got mad, better to give her two targets, including one she was too fond of to punish too harshly.

The street resembled any other Konoha street, and yet it was different. It might have been because it was so empty, and the only sounds were those of their sandals quietly hitting the paving stones. Or maybe it was the fact that the buildings were abandoned. Faded paint, rotted wood, broken windows… It was like a ghost town, and Naruto didn't like it – nor did he like Sasuke's silence, even if he thought he could understand it. He looked at him, and wasn't surprised to find that Sasuke's face was a blank, expressionless mask. He wanted to reach out to him, say that he was sorry, maybe, but he didn't think words would do anything to comfort Sasuke. So he remained silent until Sasuke stopped in front of a house and stared at it for long seconds.

"Sasuke?" he tried, keeping his voice quiet out of respect.

Sasuke looked at him; his eyes were very dark, lifeless.

"This was my house," he said, still not showing any emotion.

He took a step forward and easily slipped his shoes off. He rested his right hand onto the wall and bowed his head for a second.

"Come in."

Naruto did, pushing away his reluctance along with his questions as to what they were doing there. As soon as he had passed the threshold, Sasuke's hands moved into a complicated series of seals.

"There," he said when he was done, nodding to himself. "Now your little friend won't be able to come in or listen."

Naruto frowned, looking back to the empty street. "He won't like that. Why are you doing this anyway?"

"Because I want my prize."

Blinking, Naruto turned his eyes back to him. "Your prize?" he asked, swallowing hard.

Sasuke nodded. "I want to talk to the Kyuubi."

"Now? But why so soon?"

Without answering, Sasuke took Naruto's hand and led him into the house. Naruto followed automatically, raking his brain for an excuse to convince Sasuke to delay. It was hard to think with Sasuke's hand holding his own so tight, and even more tightly when they walked in front of a certain door. Naruto wanted to ask what was beyond it, but already Sasuke was sliding open a different door and pulling Naruto into a bedroom.

Like in the rest of the house, a thick layer of dust covered everything. Letting go of Naruto's hand, Sasuke stepped to the bed and pulled off the dusty cover, revealing slightly cleaner sheets.

"Did you live here?" Naruto couldn't help asking. "After, I mean."

Sasuke didn't ask after what. He answered on a detached tone, now going to the window and pulling the dusty curtains closed. "No, I lived in an apartment closer to the entrance of the district. But this was my room before. Sit on the bed."

A little unsure of what was going on, Naruto did as Sasuke asked. The room was dark for a second, but Sasuke turned on the lights before coming to the bed and sitting in front of Naruto cross-legged.

"Why do you want to talk to him?" Naruto asked, more anxious with every passing second. He didn't like to talk to the Kyuubi, and he didn't think that Sasuke talking to him was a good idea.

Sasuke seemed to sense his discomfort and replied without hesitation. "I was told certain things by Akatsuki and I want to know if they're true."

The word brought back a question that Naruto hadn't dared ask so far. "Akatsuki… Did you really work for them?"

Sasuke shrugged. "They thought I did."

"Why did you want them to think so?"

A few seconds passed before Sasuke asked, "Do you trust me?"

Naruto answered without thinking. "Yes."

"Then don't ask. Now. Are you ready?"

Naruto's nervousness returned in a flash. "For what exactly?"

Sasuke leaned in and kissed him, holding his face with both hands. The kiss was sweet, lips caressing lips without pressing for more. Just when Sasuke pulled away, Naruto noticed his eyes were now crimson. His heart jumped in his chest when he realized it wasn't simply the sharingan staring at him, but that other technique he had seen Kakashi use with startling results. By pure reflex, he jerked back, holding himself very stiffly as he waited for the attack. Nothing happened. Sasuke just sat there, now smiling peacefully at him.

Sasuke. Smiling peacefully while his eyes whirled wildly. Naruto rolled his eyes at himself for not understanding sooner.

"Is that it?" he asked, a little more harshly than he meant to. "Are you in my head?"

Sasuke nodded.

"And you made an illusion of yourself to keep me occupied?"

He nodded again.

Naruto glared, a little annoyed. "Can't you talk?"

Sasuke's smile never wavered. "What do you want me to say?"

Naruto thought fast, his eyes narrowing as he watched the too-perfect figure in front of him. It wasn't really Sasuke, and yet it was nice to see him smile.

"What are you telling the Kyuubi?" he asked, forcing himself to focus.

Sasuke kept smiling but did not reply. Naruto switched gears.

"What did you tell Sakura?"

Still no answer. Naruto glared at him.

"Speak to me, bastard! Say something! Anything!"

Sasuke's smile never wavered. "I love you, dead last."

Naruto blinked, shocked speechless. This was the last thing he would have expected Sasuke to say. The last thing he would have asked for. Yet the words made butterflies flutter wildly inside him. If only it had really been Sasuke in front of him…

"Did…" he gulped. "Did Sasuke tell you to say that?"

"No. You did."

Naruto's eyes widened. His cheeks were burning suddenly. "I did not!"

Sasuke was still smiling. "Deep in your mind, you did."

"So you'll say anything I want to hear?"

"Say, or do."

Had Naruto imagined the edge of innuendo in that simple word? "Or… do?"

"Is there nothing you want to do with me?" The fake Sasuke asked, enticing. "To me?"

Naruto frowned. "You're nothing more than a figment of my imagination, are you?"

Sasuke – Naruto really had to stop thinking of that image as the real Sasuke – merely kept on smiling.

"Then no, thanks," Naruto said, biting the words. "I'd rather wait for the real Sasuke."

"OK."

The fake Sasuke leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Naruto before pulling him down to lie next to him.

"What—"

"Remember, I'm just doing what you want deep down."

Tentatively, Naruto rested his hand on Sasuke's hip and pulled him just a little closer, drawing him to lie half on top of him. Sasuke easily complied – no, not Sasuke. The real Sasuke would probably kick Naruto out of bed if he ever tried to cuddle him. Still, this was nice. Naruto ran his fingers trough Sasuke's hair, something he wouldn't dare to do with the real one. Very nice. He closed his eyes, and tried to forget it was just all an act played for his sole benefit.

After a long while, he asked, "Tell me again."

Sasuke replied, half amused, half puzzled, "Tell you what?"

Naruto knew it at once. That was the real Sasuke. Snapping his eyes open, he tried to sit up, only to realize he was already sitting. He lost his balance and tipped forward, bumping his forehead against Sasuke's. Their forehead protectors clanked together. Naruto glowered at Sasuke.

"You bastard!"

His eyes were still strange, but Naruto didn't care anymore.

"What?" Sasuke said, smirking. "Did I interrupt something interesting? How far did you go?"

Naruto glowered even harder at the implications. "You think I'd want to do anything with… with… an illusion?" He flung himself off the bed. "I've got a hand. I don't need help to masturbate."

Sasuke's eyes turned back to black and he observed Naruto for a moment before saying, "I thought I'd make it easy for you."

Naruto snorted. "Easy? You use genjutsu on me and that's supposed to be easy?"

Sasuke stood and stared at him. "It could have been a lot less pleasant. You realize that, right?"

Naruto crossed his arms, refusing to let it go so easily. "Make it up to me," he demanded.

"How?"

"Tell me why you wanted to talk to the Kyuubi."

Like in the illusion, Sasuke said nothing. The difference was that he wasn't smiling anymore.

"Sakura?" Naruto asked, gritting his teeth, and still received no answer. "Tell me…" He didn't finish, and turned away rather than let Sasuke wonder why he was blushing.

"I wish I could tell you everything you want to hear. But it's better if I don't. Better for you. You said you trusted me. Please trust me on this, too."

Naruto didn't reply. More secrets. More things being kept from him for his own good. He should have been used to it by now, but it still made him mad.

Sasuke walked on to the door, and rested his hand over the light switch. "Let's go?"

Naruto nodded and walked out in front of him, retracing his steps without thinking anymore about what had happened in this house years earlier. As he had expected, Sai stood outside, arms crossed. Naruto was ready to bet his expression behind his mask wasn't too pleased. He felt like apologizing, or even explaining, but was startled when Sasuke wrapped an arm around his waist and kissed the corner of his mouth. A look at his face and the forced smirk there was enough. It was a charade for Sai's benefit, he realized. So that he would think they had wanted privacy for a much more physical reason than what they had truly done.

"Bastard," Naruto mumbled, too low for Sai to hear.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at him. "I thought you didn't care if he saw me kiss you?"

Naruto snorted and led the way up the street and out of the district, aware his behavior didn't mesh with the story Sasuke had tried to project and not caring one bit. Trusting habit to take him home, and trusting that Sasuke would come along as he had nowhere else to go, he retreated into his mind until he was standing in front of the Kyuubi's cage. Malicious eyes looked at him from the depth of the cage.

"Kyuubi?"

The demon fox growled softy. "What do you want, brat?"

"Did Sasuke tell you not to tell me what all of it was about?"

"He did. It doesn't mean I'll listen, though." The flash of teeth almost resembled a grin. "Want to know?"

"Yes."

The Kyuubi's voice took on a mocking tone. "He wanted to know if Uchihas can control me."

Ice spread through Naruto's veins at the implications. "Well?" he asked, the simple word rasping. "Can they?"

The fox growled again. "They can, the little bastards. Good thing the race is becoming extinct."

Naruto swallowed hard. "Was that all?"

"No, he also wanted to know when I last acted as a Uchiha ordered."

"And when was that?" Naruto asked with a slight frown.

"About the time you were born."

Naruto stared in shock as he understood what the demon wasn't saying. "A Uchiha set you free on the village? And Sasuke wanted to know… if he has the same power?"

"Something like that."

Naruto's mind was screaming in both pain and betrayal. The Kyuubi had to be lying. It was all a bad joke, a cruel joke he was playing on Naruto, and he even had proof of it! "But he told you to be quiet and you're not!"

The Kyubbi chuckled. "He asked me. As though it were a polite thing for me to do."

Naruto snorted. Sasuke didn't understand the Kyuubi as much as he believed.

"Would you do it?" he asked, afraid to hear the answer, afraid to even imagine this happening. "If he freed you, would you ravage the village?"

Kyuubi merely laughed.

Feeling very cold, Naruto left the Kyubbi and returned to the exterior world. He was just arriving at the apartment, Sasuke on his heels. He opened the door and entered, waiting for Sasuke to take off his shoes before he grabbed the collar of his shirt with both hands and dragged him to the bathroom. He didn't want an audience for this. He shoved Sasuke against the far wall and quickly formed the seals to create two shadow clones, one that looked like him, and one that looked like Sasuke.

He wondered what it would look like to Sai when Naruto jumped out of the window and started running, followed by a Sasuke that called out apologies at him. Sai would probably think they'd had an argument. Naruto grimaced as the pair left the room. He was becoming just as bad as Sasuke where dissimulation was concerned.

He turned to the real Sasuke, and couldn't manage to feel amused at the bewildered look in his eyes. He crossed his arms and stared at him hard.

"Now," he said coldly, "enough games. Why did you come back?"