A/N: I've still got shivers from last saturday's episode; Bill was given the perfect ending, and I'm ought to thank Moffat for that. How thrilled I am to know that the Doctor finally remembered Clara, so I thought there was nothing else I could have written about this chapter rather him finding her again.

This is set sometime after the Doctor leaves his TARDIS for the last time and before the first Doctor appears.

"We are nothing more than space dust, trying to find its way back to the stars." – David Jones.

He remembered.

He remembers.

The Doctor lurched out of his time machine. He was dizzy, his brain exploding with all the flooding memories just uncovered setting back to him. So many memories of love and loss that had taken been taken away from him so unmercifully and returned so brutally. Given back at last.

He couldn't regenerate. Not just yet. Not when he hadn't found her again and told her he did it. He had remembered every one of their adventures, of their conversations, of their travels. He remembered her.

"No!" he screamed to the void. Heard by no one but the falling snow. He buried his hands deep into the ground, using the frozen water as mechanism to prevent himself from regenerating. He had to last longer. He had to find her before it was too late.

"Clara," he called her name, on the edge of breaking down. He knew the chances of her hearing him were too close to impossible, but he had to anyway. She was his only hope. "Clara."

The Doctor wasn't surprised when the universe didn't grant him any answers.

"Clara," her name kept looping itself on his mind, "I remember you, Clara. Are you proud of me? I remember."

He felt his hearts aching just as someone knelt next to them.

She did.

"Clara," he cried her name, reaching out to feel her underneath the palm of his hands. God, how he had missed the way she smiled and laughed and looked. She was too perfectly flawless. "Clara, you found me."

The way her lips curled into a grin fed his eyes. His soul. "Of course I did, you silly old man. I'm your guarding angel, aren't I?"

When the Doctor felt her skin beneath his fingertips, he knew everything would be alright. "You were watching me?"

She hummed in acknowledgment. She didn't appear to be bothered by the cold, and neither was he. "Someone had to make sure you made it out alive."

"But I didn't," he was quick to interfere, not aiming to contradict her words, "I'm dying."

"We all face the raven in the end, Doctor," she explained, letting him rest his head against her chest, "You taught me it yourself."

"I don't want to change, never again," his words were adamant, harsh even. He was scared to search for her eyes, as he knew she would try to knock some sense into him. And mostly like succeed. "I'm not changing."

"You are, Doctor," unlike him, she sounded calm, sweet even. She didn't have to push him to believe her, because whether he did or not, he would change anyway. "There's no point in fighting what you cannot win."

"I will win, Clara," he was near the point of desperation, "After everything I've done for the universe, I think I'm owed that. At least that."

He had no idea the last time she had sustained her composure so well. "I think you know better than that," he could almost hear the tone of amusement in her voice, "It's time to set your worries and fears aside and let go."

"No," he wasn't backing down. Not just yet. "Clara, don't you understand? I'm right here, and I refuse to lose you all over again."

Had Clara still gotten a heartbeat, she would have felt a twitch coming from it. "You're not losing me, I will always live on inside of you," she ran her hands through his torso, in vain attempts of touching his soul, "But it's time to go."

"Clara," his call had suddenly become weak as he finally managed to hold the regeneration energy inside of himself, "I remember you, Clara."

He felt her smile soften against the warm skin of his face, "You don't have to lie to me," she ran wrapped the curls of his hair around her index finger, "It's okay to forget. Somethings are meant to get lost in oblivion."

Shivering slightly, he pulled her face next to his. "I'm not lying. I could never lie to you, Clara."

She froze underneath his hold.

Their lips were so close they were almost touching. "I remember everything. I remember you sacrificing yourself for me, over and over again. I remember how on your first adventure you saved an entire civilization from a parasite god. I remember you facing ice warriors and being offered to be queen of the universe."

Hadn't he known she didn't have a heartbeat, he would have guessed she had just died right next to him. "I remember you saving Gallifrey from me; how you didn't let me burn my own home planet. I remember changing my face and being terrified, just as scared as you were, and yet you helped me find myself again. I remember the mummy on the orient express and watching you be a mighty fine doctor when the TARDIS shrank.

"I remember you mourning for Danny, and yet being brave enough to defeat an entire army of cybermen. I remember you inside of an Dalek because Missy thought it would be funny; I remember almost killing you because she tried to convince me you had killed my Clara. I remember a zygon you and fearing they had killed you as well. I remember watching you die and being unable to save you, not until I came back to Gallifrey and pulled you out of your own time stream. I remember stealing you from your heartbeat and then trying to steal me away from your mind.

"I remember having a duty of care. Knowing there was nothing in the universe that would threaten you and I apart, not until we threatened the universe itself. And throughout all my fears and flaws, you were there. You were there being right and seeing the best of me, when there was nothing else to be seen. Clara Oswald, I remember you."

Her breathing was audibly coming in and out of her mouth – although she hadn't needed it for ages, she'd always relied on it as a coping mechanism. Her eyes were focused on some random spot at the snowy ground, but she wasn't really looking at it. She could feel his presence right next to her, and it brought her peace. "Doctor…?"

"Clara," he repeated her name again, assuming her to be just as shocked as him. He had no idea how he had managed to survive for so long without his memories, but one thing he knew for sure; he was never letting go of them again. Clara Oswald had then become part of who he was.

"I've…" she swallowed hard, trying to find the right words, but they didn't exist. "I've picture this moment so many times, so many ways, but now that it's happened, I don't know how to deal," she laughed, ashamed of herself.

"Understandable. I'm not exactly sure of what I'm feeling, either," he confessed, finally pulling himself away from her lap so their heads could be at the same height.

She sniffed, running the back of her hands against the corner of her eyes before anything had the chance of escape them; unsuccessfully. "I don't know why I'm crying."

He chuckled, sharing her feeling, "Me either."

"Is this what happiness feels like? Relief?" she pondered, changing looks between his eyes and his hands. For some reason, his iris seemed much grazer than usual. "Love?"

He shook his head, sadly, "Loss," his voice was just as low as a whisper; what good was remembering her when he was bound to change again?

"I haven't lost you yet. You haven't lost me yet," she stated the obvious, for once wishing the snow would cease from falling onto them. It made it all seem too much real. She was tired of reality.

He grinned, ironically, "You were just saying how it's time to change."

"Because it is," she gulped, feeling betrayed by her own words, "But it doesn't mean we can't make forever out of one second."

Carefully, he reached out to hold her hand. "You don't have to worry. I'm not changing right now."

"But the regeneration energy-"

"Is being stored away," he concluded, "I'm sorry to disappoint but you're sticking with me for a little longer."

She beckoned her lower lips, "I couldn't ask you for that. I already did, when I first saw you regenerating; it wouldn't be fair to do it again."

The Doctor placed a lock of her brown hair behind her ear, "Don't be silly. How can you ask against something that isn't happening in the first place?"

She whiffed a sad laugh.

"I've missed you, Clara Oswald," he cupped her jawline in his hand, pulling her closer than she was before. "I've missed your laugh and your smile, the way you talk and the way you look. I've missed how you make me feel like the most special being in the universe and yet the most insignificant person."

She touched her forehead against his, the snow starting to bury their limbs in the ground. "No, Doctor," she started, "That was always you."

He pulled her between his legs, welcoming her in his embrace, "I'm glad I've got you back."

Clara rested her head against his shoulder, "You've had me back for a while now."

"No, what I had was no more than a ghost, living under the shadow of the person I once thought I knew," he articulated, "Remembering you brought you back to me. God, how did I live for so long without you?"

"Because you weren't without me," her words were muffed by his velvet coat, "I never left your side, unconsciously or not. Physically or not. I was there for you the entire time."

"Then why did I always feel like a part of me was missing?" he conjectured, "All I know is that, now that I have you, I feel whole again."

Hesitantly, she agreed with a bow. "I'm glad that you found me, Doctor."

Tenderly, he kissed her temple, the corner of her eye, her apple cheek, the corner of her lips. Just letting her know how loved she was; by him and no one else. "I'm never losing you again, Clara. You have my word."

"Alright," she smiled against his alien torso, being comforted by nothing but the sound of his heartbeats echoing through her ears. Somehow, they almost made it up for her lack of one. She let herself rest against him, ignoring the clock ticking right behind them. The Doctor seemed willing to spend the rest of his short life just snuggling her close.

Until they were startled by the sound of upcoming footsteps.

Clara backed away almost instantaneously, "What was that? Is someone coming, Doctor?"

"I don't know," he said, leaning his hand against her back, "Where is your TARDIS?"

"What?" she was taken aback by his request, "Can't I stay with you?"

His hazel eyes met her chocolate ones. They were both begging. "How I wish you could, but Clara… I don't want to see you hurt. Not again. And you know how dangerous it is being near me."

"Doctor, I can take care of myself," she rolled her eyes.

"Of course you can," he nodded, "But you're frozen in time, Clara. If you get hurt, because of me, I won't be able to heal you back, and that would kill me. Please? For once in your life, just do as you're told."

Sighing deeply, she finally agreed with him. "Alright, I'll go, but…" she cleared her throat, "Will I see you again?"

"I wouldn't dream of otherwise," the Doctor offered her the snuggest face he had gotten.

Her smile met his as she pecked the corner of his face, changing one last glare before she got up and rushed in the opposite sound of the upcoming sound. The Doctor took a deep breath as he leaned back on his knees. "Hello? Is someone there?"

"Who is that?"

The Doctor didn't think twice before affirming, "I'm the Doctor."

"The Doctor? Oh, I don't think so. No, dear me, no."

He was confused until his eyes grew adjusted to the mirror standing just a few feet away from him.

"You may be a Doctor, but I am the Doctor. The original, you might say."

A/N: So, I think this is. I've loved writing this so much, and for now I can only hope we will actually see Clara Oswald back in the Christmas special, perhaps I'll even write a chapter for that episode. Thank you all who have taken the time to read and review this, you're truly a blessing :)