He'd thought that after the Apocalypse, anything else would seem tame. And he'd been right, for a little while at least, up until the point that one of his little buddies started floating and Mr. Pines had turned into a statue. After that, everything had just gotten weird again.

Not that he was going to complain! A good handyman never complained if he could help it. And since he could be extra-handy now, what with the extra hands he got sometimes, he had even less of an excuse to complain.

Soos wouldn't deny that was getting a little too weird for him, though, the whole growing-new-parts thing he could do. The tentacle-arm thing had been cool, as well as the back scratcher, the dog nose, and everything else up to the point he suddenly couldn't change back. It was still useful to a handyman, of course, but the fact that people got nervous around him was a little awful.

Heck, even Melody got a little nervous sometimes!

As soon as she'd heard what'd happened, she'd come rushing back to Gravity Falls to make sure he was okay! He'd never met a girl who would do that before, and it was great, but by the time she'd gotten there, he'd already lost the ability to change back.

She was awesome enough to try not to look too scared of him, like some people did, but sometimes whenever he did something weird, like grow a fork out of one of his fingers or another mouth to eat with since his other one was kinda buried under a bunch of squiggly whisker things, she'd look a little nervous. She'd hide it, and assure him that it was okay and that she knew he wasn't nearly as scary as he looked, but she was still nervous around him.

It hurt. It hurt a lot.

But at least his buds were around, and they didn't seem so scared of him, and that made things a little easier. Mabel would throw those fireworks she'd discovered she could make into the air at night over the Shack, trying to cheer him up with lots of fun colors, and whenever he went to go see Dipper in the woods, the little dude tried his best to cheer him up with a smile and tell him about the newest trick he'd learned, or how one of his saplings had been dug up by the gnomes and re-planted in their little hollow deeper in the woods, or how he'd accidentally freaked out a unicorn the other day by growing a sapling right in front of her hooves, or how the fairies had decided to decorate every tree of his they could find with flower chains and sparkles, including Dipper himself.

It helped, knowing that everybody else was still there, and going through the same sort of thing he was, and above all, not scared of him.

But whenever Melody looked away from his newest appendage, or whenever a passerby in town flinched when he offered a friendly fist-bump, it hurt.

Soos knew it would only make it worse, but he couldn't help but wish that the change had never happened.

"Hey, Soos!"

Soos blinked, looking around. The world around him was black and white – like that one time he'd been in Mr. Pines' head, trying to chase out Bill.

"Hey! Soos, I'm talking to you!"

The man spun around, trying to see where the voice was coming from. He was in his Abuela's old house, in the hallway outside his bedroom, but instead of there being doorways into the kitchen, the bedrooms, and the living room, the doorways seemed to open up into big hallways that stretched on forever and ever, filled with doors and flashing lights.

"Soos, don't make me find some way of taking back the Shack!"

And that was when he finally noticed the faint figure standing in front of him, ghostlike and very hard to see.

The world around him went from dark and gloomy to bright as soon as he recognized the man.

"Mr. Pines!"

"Oof!"

Mr. Pines stumbled back a few paces as Soos tackled him in a bear hug. He looked not-at-all like stone, his old regular suit-wearing cane-toting self. Actually, he looked better here! Less tired, more upright, at least before the hug.

Soos had never been so glad to see someone in his life, even if he was clearly dreaming.

"Mr. Pines, how have you been?! I haven't seen you since – well, uh, since you became a statue. Wow, this is a little awkward."

The old man squirmed a little until Soos let go, then cleared his throat, adjusting his tie and adverting his gaze a little.

"Fine, Soos, fine. But you've been getting really mopey – it's a real downer. So, what's been up?"

The good feeling vanished, and Soos sagged, looking down at his normal human hands. He didn't have the mass of limbs and tools growing out of his body here.

If only he could look like that in real life.

"Is that it?"

Soos looked up at Mr. Pines in surprise. He hadn't said anything!

"Look, Soos, you're a good guy. Stupidly naive and kinda gopher-ish, and you smell kinda weird, but a good guy. People'll get used to you soon, and when they do, they'll be groveling at your feet for an apology!" Mr. Pines rolled his eyes. "Besides, you're Mr. Mystery now! You've gotta be the freakiest thing in the Shack now, use that! You can get a lot of customers that way, they'll come flocking, with all their wallets! So stop impersonating that emo friend of Wendy's and get your ass back in gear!"

He wasn't crying in front of Mr. Pines, he wasn't!

"T-thank you, Mr. Pines! I-I'll try!"

The man grunted, and then suddenly Soos was waking up, with sunshine shining into his various eyes.

He hadn't had a dream that good in ages.

Then he looked down at one of his more human hands, and blinked.

There on his hands was written, in Mr. Pines' handwriting, Get your ass into gear, Soos!

He may not have looked too human anymore, but the expression on his face couldn't be mistaken for anything other than a smile.