There were quite a number of people Croix could do without ever seeing again. In all honesty, the list of people she never wanted to interact with anymore far outnumbered those she did. Many of the people she wished she could avoid for the rest of her natural life attended this very school. Sitting in the number 2 spot on that list was Chariot.

It wasn't out of maliciousness, at least not anymore. Croix was no longer deluding herself into thinking she didn't still care for her old friend. She thought of her almost every day at her stay at the Solis Magic Correctional Facility. She found comfort in her old memories of before everything went wrong. Today, she was once again visiting a scene from their youth.

It was about a year before Chariot ever found the damned rod that ripped apart their lives. Before, they were two young girls who thought things could last forever. It was a brisk October afternoon, and they had spent the day stealing looks and quick touches, the most they could dare to get around so many people. When classes were over and they were finally away from all the prying eyes of their classmates and teachers, their hands joined almost instantly, hoping to make up for lost time.

Croix was a gifted student, the top of her classes. Chariot was a mess, who ended up at the bottom. Neither was sure if Croix was lifting her up or if Chariot was dragging her down, but to the two young hearts it didn't matter. They spent enough time apart already, and there was no reason to waste more pondering such questions, not when they could finally show affection together after spending the day denying it existed. Chariot was pulling her cloak tighter around herself against the chill of the autumn wind, and Croix seemed to find enough warmth just having Chariot's hand in hers. When they met up in secret last night, Chariot had wanted to have a picnic, just the two of them. That was the plan for today. They had quickly snatched the brooms from their rooms and stole away to the edge of campus, to fly to somewhere where they could be unseen and uninterrupted.

There was nothing terribly exciting about flying. Witches learned to fly at a young age, and perhaps in their prepubescent years the weightlessness and the feeling of the wind against the face was thrilling, but years of flights slowly diminished the luster until it was nothing more than a means of transportation, like walking or driving. That was what always struck her about her flights with Chariot. It felt so much more. The fear in the back of her heart, the excitement shivering throughout her bones, it was intoxicating. Croix could think of so few moments in her life that were as heart-pounding and exhilarating as the feeling of Chariot's holding her hand as their brooms glided through the sky to their secret retreat. For weeks afterwards, she could still feel the delightful phantom pains of when Chariot squeezed her hand a little too tight, could still recall the short precious seconds during the flight where they tore their eyes from their path just to gaze at each other. When she flew with Chariot, after school on that October day, it felt like she was learning to fly for the first time all over again.

But therein lied why Croix wanted to avoid Chariot in the present, no matter how much her heart yearned for her. It couldn't be like that ever again. Right now, it was physically impossible. In her misguided effort to hurt Chariot by hurting her apprentice, she had given Chariot Wagandea Sickness. Even if they could turn back the clock and ignorantly pretend like Croix hadn't been as vicious as she was, the fact remained as a cruel slap in the face. Chariot would never fly again. Even if everything else hadn't happened and Croix hadn't gone so bad, they still could never relive that October night.

Croix enjoyed the memories a few seconds longer before banishing them from her mind. What was important now was to set things right. Despite previous…she'll call them distractions, she had made pretty good progress on her research. She had filled about two-thirds of a fairly thick lined notebook with every detail that could have any relevance to the cure. She had moved from her biology into direct medicine, reading over an edition of The Medical Dictionary of Curses, Hexes, and Magical Ailments. As the one way to contract Wagandea Sickness was from the pollen of the Wagandea Tree, of which there only existed one in the world, it was a very seldom studied disease. The book had but a single paragraph on it. It explained how one contracted it, what the symptoms were, and a sentence that merely read that it was "incurable."

Croix obviously didn't agree. She wasn't surprised at the brief, unhelpful, entry anyway. She had known beforehand there wouldn't be good information on Wagandea Sickness, otherwise she would've just been content to rot away in Solis forever and let someone more competent clean up her disaster. But Wagandea Sickness was far from the only disease that affected magic flow, and while none of them affected it to quite the same degree the tree's pollen could, many of those ailments had cures, and if a lesser degree could be healed, then surely there must be a way to do it on a larger scale.

She spent the morning cross-referencing from hex to another, comparing the cures from one curse to the next. If Magisiosis could render a witch magicless for weeks, but could be cured by boiling the root of a mandrake, it would make sense if the key to returning magic flow permanently lied within the biology of mandrakes. If Luluco Syndrome could affect the flow of magic into the bristles of a broom while one suffered under it, then perhaps it was worth investigating that more if she wished to get closer to the answer she wanted. Ragyo Disease held promise. As did Makokemia, and Nova's Disease and about fourteen other ailments that affected magic flow in some form similar to Wagandea Sickness.

Croix did her best not to feel frustrated. There was a lot of angles to check, and a lot of theories she would have to test. This could take years, and the possibility of another decade passing before she found anything felt very real. She couldn't let it stop her yet. She studiously copied everything down, writing all she could. She'd have plenty of time to analyze once her probation ended. Maybe if she could contact a real magic doctor, she could compare her own notes to theirs. Maybe they would even have a lab and resources to do real research instead of the meager arrangements she earned at Solis. It would still take too long, but surely the answer was just beyond her reach. She just needed to keep working, keep herself going until she reached it. She could do nothing else until what was stolen from Chariot was restored.

Keith had decided not to bother her this morning. He didn't attempt to make small talk on the way over and he hasn't yet asked how she felt today like he seemed to love to do. Perhaps getting the same answers over and over had tired him out. That worked just fine for her. Had she not known she was stuck interacting with him until she was released from the Solis Facility's care, Keith would've replaced Woodward on the number 3 spot on her list of people she could've avoided for the rest of her life. Croix was perfectly content to spend her morning with anyone trying to make discu-

"Excuse me, Croix?"

Oh, of course.

She looked up to the stout girl who had approached her table in the corner. Her long hair was tied in twin braids and she had a contented smile plastered on her face. Her hands were held innocently behind her back.

Croix hesitated a moment before speaking, trying to recall the girl. "…Jasminka, right? What do you need?"

Jasminka made a strange, little, happy noise. "I'm glad you remembered me! I came by because Constanze told me you helped her."

"Did she actually tell you that?" Keith interjected dryly. Croix just rolled her eyes as Jasminka giggled girlishly.

"I just wanted to say thank you for that! Constanze was in a really good mood! Oh, and not just her, even Sucy seemed a little happier too."

There was a swell of something in Croix's heart in that. She had wished the girls the best, but in truth, the idea that they'd actually be happier after talking with her just seemed foreign. In fact, the entire exchange, no matter how much pride it might fill her with, felt wrong. Croix had nothing to feel pride for. There was no reason any of these kids should be spending time with her, or seeking her out. Croix was not their mother, nor was she even a good person.

"I honestly don't get you kids. We barely interacted, and all I've done to any of you is hurt your friends. What…makes you not hate me?"

"I don't hate anyone, Croix." There was barely any hesitation in her answer, and Croix felt like she had been blindsided. Croix racked her brain to think of an argument back, to prove to the girl that she was being too naïve and was going to get herself hurt.

"Some people deserve it."

"Maybe. But I think life's too short to stay angry at people." She couldn't think of a good rebuttal to that. She disagreed with her immensely, but there wasn't much sense in debating with a teenager. Perhaps if the kid was lucky, she'd get to keep that idealism alive.

"…So you just came by to thank me? I didn't do anything but talk to them, it's not like it's a big deal."

Jasminka kept an arm behind her back, but used a free hand to sheepishly scratch her cheek. "Weeellll, there is one other thing." She finally revealed just what was in her other hand. A small paper plate with a cutesy design of a black cat on it, and on the plate rested several pieces of, ostensibly, food.

It was some sort of weird…cookie thing. It looked like if a cookie and a brownie and some sort of custard pie were mashed together to make some freakish Frankenstein dessert. It was the unwanted love child of an entire pastry store shelf. "We all had a party the other night." Jasminka explained while Croix eyed the amalgamation of calories in front of her. "I made these for everyone, but I ended up making too many, and no one else wants to take any more."

"…I can't imagine why." Jasminka didn't catch that, but Keith gave her a dirty look.

"They're pretty good, so I wanted you to try one! You both can, if you want."

Croix didn't want that thing near her mouth. "I'm…not allowed to eat in the library."

"Now we follow the school rules." Keith said unhelpfully.

"Please? Just try one. I'd feel bad if I had to waste food that someone could've enjoyed."

She was giving her puppy-dog eyes, which was ridiculous. Croix was a grown woman, not to mention the whole fact that she was admitted into Solis. She was not someone who would be swayed by a pathetic look, and it didn't matter how long the girl stood there eyeing her, looking so down-trodden.

…If it would get the kid off her back, Croix figured there was no choice but to choke down whatever this thing was. This was for the sake of her research, and maybe if she ate this, Keith wouldn't force her to take a lunch break today and she'd have even longer to work. Delicately, she picked it up, almost unsure of which way to hold it, and brought it closer and closer to her mouth where she forced herself to take a bite into the chocolate abomination. She chewed slowly and thoroughly, wincing as the treat hit her tastebuds.

…huh. It was…actually…not that bad. In actuality, this was good. Super good. Maybe Croix was the wrong person to ask because all she ate was packaged ramen, but this weird cookie thing actually tasted amazing. The chocolate seemed to melt on her tongue, and there was a delightful peanut after-flavor that permeated throughout her mouth. And Croix couldn't claim to know what the dough was made of, but it was to die for. This was the kind of thing people served in restaurants. How did a kid make this while on a student budget? This tasted like something she would've paid to eat, and this girl was just giving them away. She must've been working off some fancy French recipe or something.

"Here, you can try one too!" Jasminka offered to Keith, who happily took one of her strange delicious cookie monstrosities and popped it into his mouth. He's always making Croix stop to eat, and now he's stealing some of her food as soon as she ate something that wasn't microwaved noodles. Hypocrite. The kid didn't mind, at least, looking happy to have shared her creation.

"These are really good. How'd you make these anyway?" Croix asked, snatching another before Keith could grab it. "I could never make something like these. I have no talent for cooking whatsoever." Jasminka blushed at the compliment and laughed.

"It's not hard to learn!" She explained, her face beaming. "I keep telling Constanze that cooking is a lot like inventing. You, um…" She tapped her finger thoughtfully on her chin. "Cooking is like art and science if you mixed them into one. You need the right parts and you need to know how they fit together, but it's also about taking those parts and thinking of new ways to use them to build something amazing."

Croix couldn't really disagree, considering she had used similar logic to explain why she, an engineer, could possibly pursue something like the cure to a biological disease. The human immune system wasn't entirely unlike a machine, so ironing out a few glitches here and there was hardly a stretch for her own expertise.

"Um…Can I ask you something, Croix?" Croix looked up, and noticed the innocent smile had faltered on the sophomore's face. "Why did you think I hated you?"

Croix just scoffed. What a silly question. "C'mon. You're not that innocent. You didn't forget that my machines attacked your roommate during Wild Hunt last year."

"I didn't. But it's just…you said it funny. You don't…want people to hate you, do you?"

"…That's..." Obviously she didn't want people to hate her. That was ludicrous. But everyone insisted on making the situation more complicated than it really was. Croix was the bad guy. There was no gray area. She hurt Chariot, she hurt Akko, she hurt God knows how many nameless innocent people in the crossfire of her schemes. It just…didn't make sense. Solis wanted to rehabilitate her, Chariot said she was just misguided, but no one seemed to consider that she just might not be worth their time. Good people deserved that sympathy. Good people did not do what she had done.

Maybe ten years ago, when she had become so embittered about Chariot being chosen over her, she could've used the assurance. Had it been then, the gestures of kindness might not have been wasted, and maybe the young and naïve Croix Meridies could've strayed from her path. But now? After she already did all those things? What was the point? She looked to her research and called it redemption, but it wasn't really. It was compensation for the damage she had inflicted out of her own free will.

"Look. Don't worry about it, kid. It's not important." Fine. She was a teenager, a little girl in high school who didn't see things could be that black and white. Maybe she would get lucky and wouldn't have to see that idealism destroyed. Jasminka didn't look very reassured, but she took a small deliberate step closer to Croix's table.

"I just think, you're not really that bad. You helped everyone see Akko and Diana and everyone save the day, so that everyone could believe in magic again. We had a really big freshman class this year, did you know that? There's so many new people in every class! If it wasn't for you, they wouldn't have seen real magic, and they wouldn't be as inspired to come to our school!"

It was a cold comfort, if anything. She might've helped the world see, but what the world saw was someone cleaning up her mess. "Well, if it wasn't for me, you all wouldn't have been up there in the first place."

Jasminka just gave another hopeful smile that too many people seemed content to give her recently. "I guess even good things can come out of mistakes sometimes."

"…Sure, Jasminka. I guess that happens sometimes." Mistakes really didn't feel like the right word. These kids were way too willing to look past everything. It was both admirable and nerve-wracking to imagine what their futures might hold.

"I'm sorry if you're feeling sad, Croix. Thanks again for helping Constanze and Sucy feel better, though!" She held out her arms, in expectation of a hug. A hug. From her. Croix made no effort to move from her seat, and there was a brief, but noticeable, flash of disappointment on the girl's face.

"I…yeah, thank you for the chocolate…thing. It really did taste great." Again, Jasminka's face flushed at the praise.

"Hee hee! Thank you! Maybe the next time we have a party you can come too, so you can get all the food when it's fresh!"

Croix physically convulsed as she imagined the awkwardness of the scenario. "I think I'm…a bit too old for that sort of thing. It'd be strange for you all to be hanging around an older woman like that."

The girl opened her mouth to say something but was instead interrupted by cranky old librarian, who was prowling not far from the table. "Is that you, Jasminka? You better not be sneaking anything into my library again!" The witch paled, and shot a worried look to Croix and her escort as she prepared to escape.

"O-oh shoot! Um, sorry, but I think I gotta go before she gets the wrong idea again!"

"Yeah, yeah. See you around." To Croix's surprise, instead of walking out towards the doors to the building, Jasminka instead strode over to the wall behind the table and pressed an inconspicuous wooden panel, opening the secret passage Constanze had come through a few days ago. Jasminka turned and gave a cute wave before the wall shut and she disappeared from sight. Must be nice to have a roommate build private tunnels for you.

Croix again returned to her books, and again found herself having difficulty concentrating, only instead of her now characteristic mix of regret and loathing, her mind was instead filled with another thought. A student just gave her food. No one had ever given her anything during her brief stint as a teacher. Which, granted, was probably for the best considering she was attempting to harness negative emotions by starting a war and that behavior wasn't rewarded with desserts, but the gesture still struck her all the same. And it's not like it was a huge deal, considering it was either going to go to her or the garbage, but still. When was the last time someone gave her food just for the sake of it?

"It warms my heart the way you interact with these kids." Croix just about jumped out of her skin. Snapping back up from her book, her vision was filled with the sight of Chariot standing politely where Jasminka had just stood earlier.

"O-Oh. Chariot. Did you…hear a lot of that, or…?"

"I just got here. I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I overheard you and her talking about your famous broadcast. I think it's nice that you're able to get along with the girls."

"It's…not like I'm doing anything. They're coming to me. I'm just…trying to work."

Chariot looked undeterred, the smile growing on her face. "It's still nice. You connect with them better than you think you do. I bet if things were different, you would've made a wonderful teacher here at Luna Nova."

"I, uh, I don't really think I'm cut out for that…Don't really have the disposition…" Deciding she already spends enough time thinking of how things could've been, Croix chose to deflect the conversation from herself. "W-what are doing here anyway, Chariot?"

Chariot shuffled on her feet. "I know you didn't want me to sit with you when you're working yesterday, but um…I was wondering if you wanted to come by my office and have tea?" She turned to Keith. "I-if that's okay with you, of course."

"If Croix believes she can handle it, I have no problem with it." They both turned to her, awaiting her answer.

She should say no. She knows she should say no. She doesn't deserve Chariot's company, and definitely doesn't deserve her sympathy. It did not matter how warm Chariot's hand felt on that cold October afternoon so many years ago, nor did it matter how many feelings still lingered and begged Croix to step forward and accept. She should still say no. This was a wound that needed to stay closed, no matter how nice it felt to bleed.

Croix had work to do. She didn't come here to make friends, or help kids with stupid problems or even to get better like Solis deluded themselves into thinking she could. She came here to pay her penance to her once-friend and nothing more. Croix's feelings, her health, her wants and her needs were unimportant. She had long lost the right to feel as though the world owed her a thing. She lost her chance to enjoy this, she lost her chance to ever see Chariot again, she lost and lost and lost. She should say no. She needed to say no before she lost even more.

"Y-yeah…I'd like that."

A.N. Croix is the facebook mom who goes "look how talented my daughter is she's a professional chef!" Wish my girl Jasminka got more screentime. Getting a voice for her was hard

Next chapter, "Lotte". I promised we'd see some Sulotte (and Diakko) in this, so we're getting one of those! Not to mention, Croix's got a tea date with her ex. An extra spicy chapter~ We're also getting close to the most requested character too!

A lot of people have been pointing out to me that Croix is more complicated than the narration claims she is, which is great actually! Part of what Jasminka does is try and prove that to Croix, who does think she's an evil person. I'm not trying to vilify Croix, but part of the story is her coming to acknowledge that gray area herself. I think it's nice when people think about my writing critically. I like the nice comments too, but some of you are just too nice to me and it makes me blush.