Chapter Ten: Terrified

A/N: Sorry it took so long to update! I figured with the long break that a time jump might be appropriate. I hope you enjoy the new chapter :)

One Year Later -

Bellamy found routine in the mundane. He found forcing himself to lie down each night proved he could at least get a few hours before the thoughts would start in on him again. He had let his hair grow longer but he's eating better or at least he thinks he is. Raven still isn't convinced but she doesn't stare at him like he's dying anymore.

Clarke had yet to contact him again since that time a year ago and he tried every day. Every single day. He'd do so for however long they were up here in this tin can. He'd grab the receiver and tell her about his day. He'd start in the morning, getting up and getting coffee and explain to her how riveting and exciting things have been without her.

"The algae farm is coming along well, thanks to Monty." He told the receiver and he'd imagine she'd give him that small smile as she usually did and she'd say, "I'm glad, Bellamy…I'm glad"

"Me too…" He says to the receiver.

The topic of daily conversation had been the slow depletion of their air supply and what they can do to remedy it, so that two of their people didn't have to float for it. Bellamy still thought it a viable solution to head back early. Yes, it was a year earlier than scheduled but what other choice did they have? He wasn't going to be responsible for the murder of two of them. Not him. He didn't want to put that dark deed on Raven either. This is the way it had to be. They are survivors after all.

"I'm hopeful about it." Bellamy states while moving around the food on his plate with his fork. Raven who sat across from him, smirked. "I'm glad one of us is."

He heard Murphy huff at the far end of the table but it didn't stop a small smile of his own from forming on his lips.

The mess hall had seen better days. Boxes of food stores now littered the walls for ease of access and the lights have not ceased to be bright daggers that assaulted his vision each time he entered a room. He hated this place with an unmatched passion but he suspects everyone felt the same.

Raven slides her empty tray away from her and says, "I have to get back to the command center." Bellamy nods at her and as she's standing the sound of someone collapsing onto the floor, spoon and forks clinking along with them draws their attention. Bellamy quickly stands with the group as they all watch Emori convulse helplessly on the ground.

"SOMEONE DO SOMETHING." Murphy screams.

They crowd around her and Raven kneels beside her until the convulsing stops. Blood begins to pour from her nose.

"What the hell is happening?" Harper exclaims.

"Bellamy, help me carry her to the med lab." Raven calls and Bellamy quickly kneels beside them, each putting one of her arms over their shoulders. They quickly move towards the entrance to hallway when Bellamy began to feel his chest constrict. It was a small discomfort at first as they ran down the quiet hall towards the med bay but as they got inside and set Emori down on the exam table he could feel that something was wrong. Really wrong.

"Raven…" Bellamy says and he felt warm liquid meet his lip from his nose.

"Shit…your nose is bleeding." Raven says with a look of terror.

Bellamy stumbles on a grunt and falls forward. Raven is there, catching him and bringing him safely to the ground before darkness finds him.

Bellamy felt warmth on his face. The natural kind of warmth one feels from the sun. He could even feel a slight breeze swim by him sending strands of his hair across his forehead. He reaches out feeling soft grass between his fingers. He could even see the light now behind his eyelids, shining through.

He blinked them open, blinded by the sun above and before he can lift his hand to block it a shadow passes over it, above him. A face. Her face.

"Where did you go?" She asks him softly from above and lifts a brow, waiting for his response.

He sits up quickly, squinting against the daylight. His eyes hadn't seen so much light in ages. So much sun. The area around them is the summer filled green and trees marked the back drop. His heart jumped when his eyes found hers again and she was looking at him as if he has lost his mind. "Bellamy?"

"This is Earth." Bellamy states and a wide smile breaks out across his face.

"I didn't think I'd see you again." She states and that melancholy awareness comes back to her features. It made his chest ache almost permanently. "Where did you go?" She asks him again and he reaches out to rest his palm to her cheek and it's warm beneath his skin. It's everything. He didn't need to know how he got here or why. His heart is thrumming beneath this sun. This place. It felt real, it didn't feel like a dream and he is going to convince himself of that even if it's a lie.

"I talk to you every day." She says and he tilts his head at her.

"Can you hear me through the radio?" He asks and he can feel his throat tighten.

"I can hear you now." She says and she rests her hand over his heart. She looked so real. How was this possible? His mind couldn't possibly be this cruel. A soft wind envelopes them, creating patterns in the grass beside them.

"Where are we?" Bellamy asks and she studies his eyes, carefully, with hidden concern.

"I don't know. You seem so far away. All of you." Her eyes are glassy in the sun. He leans forward wrapping his arms around her and she's a solid weight, beating heart and breath. She presses her face into his neck and squeezes him tight against her to hold him there.

"You're fading." She says with quiet desperation. "I…-"

Then her voice is cut short. The sudden onslaught of agony grips hold of him and his eyes shoot open to the bright artificial light above. He rolls over and gets sick into a metal bin below the table.

"Bellamy…Bellamy." Raven's voice is behind him and then as he lies down again, she's above him.

"How do you feel?" She asks. Her voice is echoing and the lights are far too bright. He can't blink them away. He can still feel her weight against his heart.

"Like absolute hell." He rasps.

"You and Emori were poisoned. I've got everyone locked in the mess hall right now until we find out how this happened." Raven replies. She runs her hand over his forehead, pushing the sweaty strands away and feeling his temperature.

"Luckily whoever the hell did it, didn't know what they were doing and it was just enough for you to recover." Raven replies and holds a cup of water to his lips for which he proceeded to drink from. His head felt like it had been smashed to pieces.

He moans pressing the palms of his hands to his face. "We have to find out who did this."

"We…aren't going to anything. You have to rest." Raven says and pats his chest with the shake of her head.

"Who the hell would poison us?" Bellamy asks, cringing when Raven steps out of the way of the light. It assaults him once again and he lifts his hand to block it.

"I don't know but it was just the two of you meaning they were doing it to save on air apparently. Murphy tried to attack Monty since it was him who cooked the food." Raven says and Bellamy can hear the exhaustion that tinted her speech.

"It wasn't Monty…" Bellamy states and shuts his eyes.

"Get some rest, okay? Emori is also resting even if she insisted otherwise." Raven replies and doesn't wait for him to protest more before she leaves.

Raven is tired of this shit and that's putting it mildly. If the ship wasn't falling apart then they were trying to murder each other and it's only been a year. She didn't look forward to what other joys this stay had in store.

She presses the code to open up the mess hall which she locked down and immediately sees Murphy attacking Monty again.

"HEY! Knock it off." Raven yells as she runs over to them to break them apart. They tumble away from each other panting and Murphy yells, "IT WAS HIM!"

Monty stands and angrily exclaims, "I wouldn't do that to Bellamy or Emori or anyone here, goddammit!"

Raven interrupts, "Someone here did. We need to find out who it was. I understand the 'logic' because of our air depletion but really?" She looks to each face that stares back at her.

"Well you know it wasn't me. Can I see Emori now?" Murphy adds, still gaining his breath back from the rage filled argument.

"We don't know that." Raven replies and Murphy squints at her as if he's perplexed.

"You've got to be kidding me. Emori was poisoned, Raven. You think I'm that low?" Murphy asks with the shake of his head.

"Maybe…" Monty says from across the room and that gains a snarl from Murphy.

"Enough!" Raven echoes and takes a deep calming breath.

Bellamy forced himself upright, finally getting out from beneath the torture of the light.

"What a day or night or whatever, eh?" He hears from behind him and he turns his head to see Emori looking worse for wear on another table identical to his.

"You know who poisoned us?" Bellamy breathes and stands from the table, wobbly from weakness.

"How in the hell would I know?" Emori snaps and Bellamy shakes his head before heading towards the door. He tries to open it and notices Raven had put a lock on it. He attempted a code and it flashed red back at him. "Dammit." He says under his breath. He uses the wall for support and presses his back into when he turns to face Emori who is sitting up, slowly. Her skin is sickly pale and she glares at him.

"It was Murphy, wasn't it?" Bellamy says and the anger from Emori is immense. If she wasn't so weak he imagines she would attempt to punch him.

"You really think Murphy would poison me?"

"It just…it seems deliberate with how little we were given, like it was an experiment and the only way it wouldn't implicate him would be to do the same to you. I would bet you were even in on it. Maybe he thought he gave me more than he did." Bellamy explains.

"Fuck off." Is her response before she lays back down again, turning on her side away from him.

"Just a thought."

"Fuck right off."

Bellamy hums in agreement before slumping down into a very uncomfortable metal chair.

He continues, "You know we will all survive this. I know you're scared. I am too. I know whoever did this didn't or wouldn't have done this under different circumstances. I understand that but this can't happen. We're almost home."

She says nothing and he watches her back. He imagines she'd curse something else at him if she did.

"I said that we'd all make it to ground again and I meant it. You and Murphy, all of us deserve another chance. We just have to work together." Bellamy tries and the silence remains. It's true, they are all terrified, even if he resented the hate they seem to harbor for him.

His eyes are drooping and he felt lethargic. He stood from his chair and collapses back onto the exam table. He hopes at least when sleep finds him that Clarke does too.