A/N: Soooo, not only am I giving you the longest chapter yet to make up for the long delay, but I am also promising you that the next chapter will be up very soon, as its already written on paper, just need to take the time to type it.

Enjoy!

(Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nothing at all.)

13 days.

That's 312 hours.

And 98 of those hours had been painless.

In those 13 days, he had had 13 sessions with Dr. Wyatt.

And he had said a total of 19 words to her.

And in those 13 days, he learned that he was beginning to build up a tolerance, which he had expected. He learned what time it is best to take them, knowing that the effects may not completely wear off for up to 12 hours. But he also knew that it peaked after only an hour, so he would be able to easily go to work without anyone noticing after 4-6 hours.

And in those 98 hours of content, only one person had become suspicious. On day 7.

- - - - - - - -

It was raining. Izzie had gone to work early, no longer waiting for Alex. They had grown apart in the last few weeks, which was Alex's fault but he didn't care. She would never think of him as anything more than an ass anyways.

Meredith called for him from the bottom of the stairs, but was met with no response. She trotted up the stairs and into his bedroom , where she saw him lying on his bed, eyes open in small slits.

"Alex, we're gonna be late. Alex?" She walked over to his bed and noticed that his breathing was shallow.

"Alex? Alex!" She put her fingers on his cold, clammy skin and searched for a pulse.

"What?"

"Alex! You scared the shit outta me! What's wrong, are you okay?"

"Fine."

"You don't seem fine."

"I think I'm comin' down with a cold or something." He stood up, but sat back down on the edge of the bed when his head started spinning.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, Mer, I'm fine."

"'Cause you know you can tell me. You would tell me right? If anything was wrong, you would tell me?"

"Yeah. Of course."

"Okay. Do you want to stay home today? I'll tell the chief you're sick."

"No, I'll be fine."

"Okay."

- - - - - - - -

And that was it. No mention of it ever again.

But while he hadn't gone 13 days without drugs, he had gone 13 days without surgery. Without even being allowed into the doing charts and a few sutures. When he asked Dr. Bailey when he would be allowed to scrub in, she simply answered "When I think you're ready. Now stop bothering me." Not wanting to dig himself into a deeper hole, he usually obeyed.

Alex sat on the tan couch for the fourteenth time. He expected this visit to be like all the others. She would ask him a few different questions and he would respond with either silence or a monosyllabic had learned to do things to pass the time, like trying to remember the entire periodic table to show up Lexie.

Hydrogen, Helium, Lithium, Beryllium, Boron, Carbon, Nitrogen, Oxygen, Fluorine, Neon-

"Alex, do you want to be here?"

Great. More questions.

"I'm sure you know that Meredith Grey comes to see me. And while I won't tell you what we discuss, I will tell you that she came here willingly, but said nothing for the first few sessions. But after she started talking, she made so much progress."

Alex looked up at her but remained silent. She stared at him, her eyes urging him to say something, but after a moment she went back to her paper work.

Thirty minutes later, Meredith burst into the room.

"Dr. Wyatt, I- Oh," she said, acknowledging Alex's presence. "Sorry." And she turned around and left.

Alex sat there for a brief second, then stood up. "I gotta go."

Meredith's shift had ended an hour ago, and she had spent that entire time searching for Alex. She finally found him in a supply closet, sitting in a corner, charting.

"What are you doing?"

"Charting."

"Why?"

"Because it's all I ever do."

"I mean, why are you doing it in a closet?

"I don't know."

She sat down beside him. "Want some help?"

"Your shifts over, you should go home."

She grabbed a chart. "I'd rather do this. Derek's on-call tonight anyways. What else do I have to do?"

They sat there together and charted in silence. Finally, Meredith got the courage to talk.

"Look, about today, in Dr. Wyatt's office. I won't say anything."

"Thanks."

"Is she helpful?"

"We don't really talk."

She paused. "I know what it's like, going in there, not being able to say anything. But once you finally give her a little piece, it gets easier. You can work your way up to the big stuff. Just start out with the little things."

He looked at her.

"It gets easier, Alex."

They looked at each other, and he didn't have to say the words thank you for her to get the message. That's what he liked about her. She understood him.

Maybe she was right. Maybe it did get easier. And maybe eventually he wouldn't need the drugs anymore.

Maybe someday.

Maybe.

A/N: Thanks for reading. Review please!