Author's note: So sorry it has been so long since I last updated. I'm participating in National Novel Writing Month starting next week and I am going to get a chapter of this edited so that I can publish in a couple weeks. Thanks so much for keeping up with this. This chapter is a little heavy, so prepare yourself for some feels
Much thanks to my awesome beta Everlylark!
Happy reading.
Chapter Eight
It was the Sunday before Thanksgiving. Peeta and Callie usually spent their Sundays with Finnick and Annie and their family, but this one would also have extra guests as the Odairs hosted an early Thanksgiving meal for their extended family.
Peeta and Callie walked into the house to the sound of Nell crying loudly. The baby was only a few weeks old, but she was already as loud and demanding as the rest of the Odair clan.
Callie dropped her coat and ran forward to look up at Finnick as he bounced the baby and tried to coax her into drinking her bottle. "Why are you making her cry, Finnick?"
With a weary laugh, Finnick shook his head. "I'm doing my best to get her to stop." He held her out to Peeta. "Here, you're the baby whisperer. You try."
Peeta handed the groceries to Callie and took Nell into his arms, accepting the bottle Finnick held out. He slowly started swaying. "Hey, you. Why are you giving your folks a hard time?" He offered the bottle to Nell. She still fussed a bit, but eventually accepted the nipple in her mouth and started sucking hard.
Annie looked up from the pot on the stove. "Miracle worker!"
Callie smiled proudly. "My daddy's magic." She walked in and held up the bags to Annie.
"He sure is." Finnick inclined his head toward the kitchen. "Come hang out. I can finally help Annie cook."
"Did you get all the stuff for the dressing?" Annie asked as she took the bags Callie carried.
Peeta nodded. "Sure did." he nudged Callie up the stairs with the tip of his shoe. "I'm sure Maggie and Pearl have been waiting for you."
His daughter ran up the stairs without any further prompting and then Peeta followed Finnick into the kitchen.
Annie reached out and stroked her fingers over Finnick's cheek. He closed his eyes and let out a satisfied breath. "Better?" Annie asked softly.
"Much." Finnick turned his head and kissed her palm. "We should hire Peeta to be our nanny. He's the only one who was ever able to get our babies to calm down."
Peeta chuckled as he sat with Nell on a nearby barstool. "I've already got a job. But thanks." He leaned over and kissed Nell's forehead. "You doing okay now, Nellie? Yeah?" He smiled down at her and thought about when Callie was so small.
Peeta held Callie all the time in her first weeks of life. Alex had to tell him to put Cal down so she could sleep, but then he'd stand over her crib just watching her chest rise and fall.
Nell finished the bottle and her eyes drifted closed. Peeta lifted her to his shoulder to gently pat her back. She let out a belch, followed by warmth down his back.
Finnick laughed. "Should have warned you about that one. It's been pretty bad the last few days."
Annie took the baby and cleaned her up. "Finnick, let Peeta borrow one of your shirts. We'll throw yours in the wash, Peeta."
"Thanks, Annie." Peeta followed Finnick up to the master bedroom.
"Annie made me finish up all the laundry this morning, so you're in luck." Finnick said as he rummaged through a drawer.
Peeta slowly peeled off his shirt and took the one Finnick offered. "Thanks, man."
"No prob, Bob." Finnick watched him a moment and then asked, "You okay?"
Peeta pulled the new shirt on and shrugged. "I'm managing."
Finnick draped an arm over Peeta's shoulder and guided him out of the room. "You're always surrounded by people who care about you. Just remember that."
Peeta nodded. "Thanks." He paused a moment to look in on the kids as they laughed in Maggie and Pearl's bedroom. "I just want to be a good dad to her."
"You are." Finnick said. "You're doing a very good job."
"Thanks." Peeta felt his heart constrict.
"No problem." Finnick led him down the stairs.
The front door opened and Johanna walked in. "The party's here, bitches!"
"Jo-Jo!" Finnick exclaimed and picked up his sister. He swung her around in a circle and noisily kissed her cheek. He looked at her hair, spiked all over. "You definitely need to stop one-upping me on the hair."
Johanna reached up and smoothed her hand over Finnick's hair. "Yours is looking really clean for being a father of four. Speaking of, where's my Nellie?"
Cressida, Castor, and Pollux walked into the house loaded down with boxes and bags. Cressida called, "That's fine, babe, we have everything."
Johanna paused and looked over her shoulder. "You know I can't lift heavy things."
Cressida gave her a smirk. "Then you need to explain last night."
Finnick laughed. "I'm required to tell you there are children present, so you shouldn't talk like that."
"Thank you." Annie called from the kitchen. "Someone come get Nell so I can finish the potatoes."
They all converged in the kitchen. Johanna grabbed up Nell and scurried off into the other room followed by Castor and Finnick.
Peeta started going over the ingredients for dressing that he'd brought over and went to work on the side dish.
Pollux and Cressida turned to each other and started signing rapidly. Peeta noticed that Cressida had a bit of a disgruntled scowl and Pollux was calmly pleading.
Annie said, "Cress, did you bring the pie?"
Cressida continued to sign as she spoke. "Yes. Spent all night trying to get it right. I burned the first one."
Pollux signed with a smile and Cressida laughed.
"He said it was still good burnt." Cressida translated. She raised her hands again. "But I had good help in the kitchen, so it was fine in the end."
Pollux smiled and placed his fingers against his chin and moved it forward.
Cressida repeated the sign and then moved toward the stove. "How can I help?"
Annie looked around the room and pointed as she made the list. "Peeta's getting stuff ready for the dressing, turkey's in the oven, and I'm finishing with cutting up these potatoes. Cinna and Mags are bringing cranberry sauce and crescent rolls. You brought pie and other desserts. I think we're good for now. You can help with potatoes."
Cressida signed for Pollux and he signed back. Peeta was fascinated by the swift movement of hands. They weren't soulmates, but the circumstances of Pollux's brother being connected to Cressida's wife thrust them together and must have made them just as close.
Peeta continued to work on the dressing as he listened to the voices filling the house. This was his favorite time of year, but it was the first time he felt the full impact of Alex being gone. He tried to push it away, but all his pain and guilt suddenly came to a head. It boiled over when Finnick walked into the room and wrapped Annie in a quick hug.
"Please excuse me." He hurried out the back door and walked several feet away until he reached the fence that sectioned off the property. Bending over, he rested his hands on his knees and breathed deeply until the pain subsided.
He turned to see Annie waiting patiently a few feet away. "If it's too much, you can go. We can keep Callie for a while if you need to be alone."
"I just…" His chest constricted and he rubbed it. "It's all my fault, Annie."
"No, Peeta." She moved forward and gently grabbed his face. "This wasn't something you could have changed."
"It was. I should have done something different. I should have been paying attention—"
"Stop." She pulled him close. "You couldn't have done it any differently. The other driver was drunk. You were paying attention."
Peeta clung to Annie as the tears finally started to flow. "I can't do it, Annie. I can't." He let go and hurried out of the side gate and got into his car. He started driving not knowing where he was heading until he pulled into the cemetery. He rested his head on the steering wheel and sobbed heavily for a long time.
He eventually got out of the car and stumbled to the place he hadn't visited in so many months. He told himself it was because she wasn't there. Why would he go? He could achieve the same comfort by looking at her picture. Which wasn't much comfort at all in the end.
Peeta's knees buckled as soon as he saw her name. "Alexandrea Mellark: Beloved daughter, wife, and mother."
How long he kneeled there in front of the stone, he didn't know. The sun dropped lower in the sky and he barely registered the sound of his phone going off in his pocket. He sat back and took it out to discover several missed calls and texts from Annie and Finnick. There were some from his father and Cara. Then one from Katniss Hawthorne.
He opened Katniss's first. It read, I feel really heavy today. Are you okay?
Was that part of the bond? That you could feel the emotions of your soulmate? That wasn't something he'd ever heard of. Maybe if the feelings were extra strong?
He typed out a response. I'm fine. He didn't feel comfortable saying anything else.
The messages from the others were all worried, asking where he was, if he was okay. He called Annie.
"Callie is so worried, Peeta." Annie said. "We all are."
"I know." Peeta felt his throat constricting and he could hear Callie crying loudly in the background.
"Want me to come get you?" Annie offered.
"I drove myself." He said lamely.
"Could you drive yourself now?" She asked softly.
He thought a minute. "I don't know. Annie, I'm…"
"Where are you? Finnick and I are coming."
He could hear Callie's wail in the background and she begged, "No, Finnick, don't go."
Annie said, "Then Cressida and I are coming. Where are you?"
"Visiting Alex." He reached out and traced her name.
"Okay. Stay put." He held the phone to his ear until he heard the sound of the call disconnecting.
Peeta sat there, tracing and retracing the letters on the stone, until Annie dropped down beside him. She wrapped her arm around his waist and whispered, "She knew she was going to marry you the first time she saw you."
He looked over. "Did she?"
Annie nodded and sat up on her knees to lean closer to the headstone. "I think if she knew about Katniss, she'd be excited for you. She was always so curious about soulmates. She asked me all sorts of questions after Finnick and I realized it."
"I don't want to talk about Katniss while I'm sitting here. Tell me how she knew we were going to be married."
"You had first period together in ninth grade. Do you remember? We all did." Annie sat back and pulled her coat closer around her shoulders. "I don't remember the day, but one time after class she pulled me into the bathroom and said, 'I'm going to marry that Peeta Mellark someday.'"
Peeta let out a chuckle. "I didn't much notice her until the next year."
"That's because I gave her tips." Annie said with a laugh. "Do you remember at the beginning of sophomore year when you got your class schedule and we compared our classes?"
"Yeah?" He gave her a suspicious look.
"That was Alex's schedule. She changed all the ones I marked so you could have classes together." She smiled. "She loved you so much, Peeta. She really did. And she loved Callie. Being your wife and Callie's mom were her two biggest accomplishments. She loved every day with you, even the bad ones."
"How do you know, Annie?" Peeta felt the tears coming back and he wiped angrily at them.
"Because she told me." Annie reached forward and gently took hold of his face, stroking away the moisture with her thumbs. "You never really took the time to grieve for her. So if you need it, you take it. We all understand. But you at least need to let your daughter know what's going on."
He nodded. "Where's Cressida?"
"She took her car back." She held out her hand. "Give me your keys."
He handed them over and followed her toward his car. The tears streamed down his face the whole ride. Annie kept her hand on his leg the entire time and he welcomed the comforting touch.
As soon as he walked into the house, Callie threw herself into his arms. "Daddy, I was scared."
"I know, baby." He pressed his nose into her hair. "I know. I'm so sorry."
She clung to him. "Please don't leave again."
"I won't, baby. I'm really sorry." He held her close as he walked into the kitchen.
Annie said, "The turkey is almost done."
Peeta nodded, his eyes still pressed into Callie's hair and her little arms wrapped around his neck. She still whimpered softly, but she was finally calming a little. There was still a fog around him as they sat down to dinner.
Mags raised her glass and called everyone's attention. "I think it's time to go around to say all we're thankful for. And I would like to start by saying I am thankful for each and every one of you in my life. And that I'm here."
Cinna spoke up next, reaching across the table to the older woman. "I'm thankful for another Thanksgiving with you, Mags." He sat back. "With all of you."
"I'm thankful for my Daddy." Callie said from her seat, pressed into Peeta's side.
"And I'm thankful for you, Cal." Peeta kissed the top of his daughter's head.
Everyone else said similar things. Peeta watched Mags for a while. She'd been through a few rounds of chemo, but she was in remission the last he knew. Could her words mean the cancer was back? They didn't say. And Mags wasn't one to bring that up at this sort of gathering.
Peeta picked at his food and stroked Callie's hair. He wondered, as he watched the three soulmate pairs, if being near Katniss would help him. But he knew that it was mostly as Annie said and he needed to take his time to grieve that was taken from him when he was recovering from his injuries.
As the pie was brought out, Callie climbed onto Peeta's lap. "Can we go home, Daddy?"
"Yeah, I think that's a good idea." He stood with her and made apologies as they gathered their coats by the front door.
Annie followed. She gently scratched Callie's back. "If you need to talk, just call. Any time day or night."
"Can I call you?" Callie asked.
Annie smiled and kissed her cheek. "Sure you can."
Peeta wrapped his free arm around Annie's shoulders. "Thank you."
"Any time." Annie whispered. "I love you guys." She stepped back.
"I love you, Annie." Callie said sweetly.
Peeta nodded. "Love you." He carried Callie out to the car.
When he got home, he softly explained to Conrad and Cara what happened. Cara nodded knowingly and gently coaxed Callie onto her lap.
"You should take some time for yourself more often." Cara said, combing his fingers through Callie's hair. "After your recovery, your whole life has been consumed with the shop and taking care of Callie. You don't have to do it all alone. It's part of the reason we wanted you here with us."
Conrad nodded. "Even though your brothers grumble about how many Saturdays you take off, they understand why you need that time."
Peeta nodded. He leaned over and kissed the top of Callie's head and then Cara's temple. He stood and gave his father a hug. "I do need some time." He started towards the stairs and Callie called after him.
"It's okay, Callie." Cara said. "How about you help me make some cookies?"
"I don't want cookies, I want Daddy." Callie wailed.
Peeta turned and gathered her close. "It's been a long day. How about we go to bed a bit early?" He walked upstairs with her curled close and she didn't let him go until she fell asleep.