We have been here nearly two weeks and yet this storm has refused to let up. Even if it were to attempt escape at this point, it would be pointless. In all likelihood we would be forced to return until the roads cleared enough to pass through.
A new development has come to my attention during this time. Kagome is with child. Rather than causing the elation I had expected, it has merely caused a flood of dread. Blood line aside, fear occupies my thoughts that my unseen and mostly unacknowledged condition might be passed on as well.
A bout of illness has spread amongst the other travelers who have taken refuge here lending credence to my belief that something unnatural is going on. For someone in her condition it seems incredibly imbecilic to be caring for them but she has insisted it is her life's work and that all they suffer from is mere colds. Despite her reassurances, I cannot help but worry.
I must admit I am glad that my condition is not as serious as theirs but the only purpose their illness serves is to increase my agitation and desire to leave. Kagome does not know how much I truly suffer being cooped up here. She insists there is nothing to be concerned about as I lack any physical symptoms. She knows there is no reason for alarm whereas this whole experience confuses and eats away at my very being. Despite my general discomfort, it weighs heavily on me that I am so useless here. Despite my condition, as much as the slaying of demons fatigued my body, I hate being idle. Yet my exhaustion is almost all consuming so I do not know why it bothers me so. No one would believe what an effort it is to accomplish what little I am able. To venture further than our room, to bathe and smile for the innkeeper's wife who brings us our food.
It is fortunate that Kagome is such a dear girl and loves to care for those in need of her skills but due to my condition, I cannot be with her at all times and that in itself scrapes at every fiber of my being. I have asked to accompany her, begged even, but she will not let me. I suppose she has never felt like this before in her life. She is always laughing and all smiles and joy. Oh, how she laughs and teases me about that lacquered cabinet I despise so much and I must admit I join in on occassion despite feeling those eyes on my back.