I gripped my robe tighter around my neck. "Todd, what are you doing here?"

"I couldn't let everything that happened the other night just be 'it,'" Todd said. "I mean, I asked you to marry me. I can't just walk away from you that easily."

I took a breath, feeling like a deer caught in headlights.

"Todd -- you were being honest about your feelings. Your first inclination was to walk away, that's why you did it."

"--Maybe I was wrong," Todd said. "...I mean, to jump to such conclusions about everything...it was wrong of me to do that to you."

He handed me the flowers, "So I came to apologize and see if maybe we could talk some things out?"

Here it was again,. That overwhelming sensation that no matter what I did now, I was a bad person.

"Todd -- I think maybe you were right to walk away," I said slowly. "I - I don't want to play games with you.....but I can't be what you want...."

Hmm...that was starting to sound familiar.....I was saying to him almost word for word what Nathan had said to me in my living room, what seemed like a million years ago now.

"What does that mean? You can't be what I want? You agreed to marry me..." Todd said.

"I know...." I looked at the ground. "...and as hard as this is for me to say....I don't think I should have accepted the proposal....I do love you and care about you....but not in the way that you need. You need someone who is going to be there for you....and.."

I trailed off. It was true I wanted to talk with him about everything. I just hadn't hoped or planned on Nathan being in the next room while it was happening....

I also had every intention of giving the engagement ring back to him and was trying to find a way to sneak back and retrieve it.

"Wait right here," I said.

I walked back to retrieve the ring and walked back to the doorway. The look of pain and sadness on Todd's face when he could see that I was giving the ring back - it was indescribable and I know it will haunt me for a long time.

Could this get any worse?

As if karma was waiting to answer my question ---I could see that Todd was looking past me now. I whirled around to see that Nathan had appeared in the living room doorway, wearing shorts, no shirt with a towel around his neck.

Nathan looked shell-shocked.

I turned from Nathan back to Todd.

"I don't know what to say," I said.

Todd pursed his lips, getting angry. "You don't have to say anything-- I get it."

He turned on his heel and walked down the sidewalk as I closed the door in a sense of shock at what had transpired over a three minute span.

"Uh, are you alright?" Nathan asked quietly.

I merely nodded as I still clasped the bouquet that Todd had brought me.

Nathan just watched me for a second.

I looked at the ground, suddenly feeling very ashamed.

"I am a horrible person," I said aloud after a second.

Nathan put his arm around my shoulders in a gesture of comfort, "aww, c'mon...no you aren't."

I shook my head, "no...I am...what kind of person does this to other people? Other people she claims to love no less?"

Nathan just looked at me, knowing there wasn't much he could say to make me feel better.

"Well, you aren't a bad person...maybe I'm the bad guy...I came back into your life and all of this happened."

I looked up at him, "It happened because I allowed it -- I wanted it to happen." I touched his face. "I know that I will never love anyone the way that I love you -- and no matter what happens, that's how it is for me.....but I ended up hurting people in the process....nothing should be this difficult to hold onto...."

Nathan wrapped me in his arms. "Please don't say that. Yeah, I've made this more difficult than it needed to be but that doesn't mean its not worth fighting for. Haley, I have made so many mistakes in the past. I let you go, thinking a different life would make me happier -- but it didn't....I never felt truly happy when I was away from you-- I think I tried to hide behind drinking and basketball...but it just didn't mean anything if you weren't there with me....it's always been you...no matter how hard I tried to deny it or fight it.... and I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere....I'll fight to make this work with you -- I'll fight for you."

I hugged him tightly for a moment.

"...after we saw each other again, that's when I knew - I wasn't over you....and if you were willing to give me a second chance...I knew I didn't want to mess things up a second time....I couldn't lose you again," he said softly.

"Haley, I love you so much - and I know that I always will."

"I love you too," I said, feeling tears welling up.

I pulled away after a moment. "I just need some time to myself, though, ok? "

Nathan looked at me with a questioning stare. "Okay....do you want to be alone now, or for the day..? "

I closed my eyes. "I just need some time, I don't know how much right now, alright?"

He nodded silently and I could feel him watching me as I walked back to the bedroom and shut the door.