CHAPTER 5:
TOSHI F***ING SNAPS!!!
In the hot spring...
"Doesn't this feel good, Kuchiki-san?" Orihime asked, stepping into the very warm water.
"Yeah. It's been forever since I've been in a hot spring," Rukia said.
"I think it's fabulous!" Rangiku said.
"Yes," Nemu stated. She wasn't much of a talker, but somehow, she always seemed to get her point across to the people.
Finally, Nanao showed up. "Sorry I'm late. I was watching the landscape with Shunsui- I mean- Captain Kyoraku," Nanao said, going underwater.
"Nanao's embarrassed!" Rangiku laughed. She loved joking around. Until Nanao spit water in Rangiku's face.
"Meanie," Rangiku muttered.
"This is the life," Ichigo said, relaxing in the waters. It had been forever since he had relaxed like this. Heck, it had been five years since he had gone to a hot spring.
"You said it," Uryu said, reading his book.
"Did you guys see Barrack Obama in the lobby?" Chad asked.
"He's here?" Uryu asked. "I didn't know someone killed him."
"Stop worrying about him and start chillaxing," Renji said.
"Yeah," Ikkaku said. Uryu, Chad, and Ichigo all shielded their eyes.
"What's the matter with you three? It's like you guys are blind! Why are you doing it too, Renji?!"
"Sorry. The reflection your head gives of the moon is really bright tonight," Renji said, putting on a pair of his expensive glasses.
Ikkaku walked away. He was very miffed off. (If I were him, which I can't be cuz I'm not bald or lame, I would've roundhouse-slapped Renji, took Uryu's glasses and threw his book into the water, tell Rukia that Ichigo wanted to make out with her so badly that he kisses his pillow for practice, and tell Yachiru that Chad's coin is a dog biscuit.)
"Hi, everybody!" Shunsui called. He was followed by Jushiro and Toshiro.
"How's your vacation been, Toshiro?" Ichigo asked. Again, he decided not to use his honorific. That's right, he may forget faces and names, but he chooses not to use the honorific... I think.
"For the last flippin' time, it is Captain Hitsugaya. DON'T YOU EVER LISTEN TO ME? OR DO YOU JUST HATE ME AND DECIDE TO TRY TO MAKE ME SHRED YOU TO BITS?!?!?!" By now, Toshiro had foam seething from his mouth, and his eyes couldn't quite focus.
"Chillax Captain Hitsugaya. We're on vacation. I mean-" Renji was cut off by Toshiro cutting his sunglasses into six even pieces.
"I AM THOROUGHLY 'CHILLAXED!'" now Toshi was angry...
Will Renji make it to tomorrow? Will he too get cut into six pieces? Will Byakuya get a flippin' part in this story? Find out in the next chapter of "Vacation: AlI I NEVER wanted."