Chapter Three: Yuuri vs. Death by Shock: What Not to Do When a God is Dropped on Your Doorstep
Yuuri only started believing his own eyes when Victor met his gaze and stood to greet him.
"Yuuri!" he exclaimed, smiling warmly and extending his hand. Does he want me to get naked into the onsen with him? Yuuri thought. I will keel over dead.
"Uh," Yuuri squeaked. That was it. That was the only noise he felt capable of making right now.
"I couldn't find you in the castle, but that nice boy Phichit gave me the password and told me to check outside in the onsen! He said it's your favorite place and I can't say I blame you. I'm probably never going to leave!"
Yuuri was just trying desperately to remember to breathe and also to keep his eyes above waist level because if he didn't, he was going to get an eyeful of Victor's junk and he was pretty sure he wouldn't survive it. Yuuri tried to pull himself together enough to say something.
"What are you doing here?" he managed to rasp. There. Actual words. Probably not the words he had been hoping for, but anything was better than his first thought, which was please marry me.
"I transferred here!" Victor said with a smile. Yuuri just gripped the hem of his shirt harder.
"You...you go to Mahoutokoro now?" he whispered faintly.
"Yes!" I just got here this morning. I missed the orientation but you'll show me around, won't you?" Victor actually batted his eyelashes at him.
This is a just a very weird dream, Yuuri told himself firmly. I got into the hot spring and fell asleep, and I'm going to wake up with pruney fingers and toes and I'll have missed dinner.
Yuuri pinched himself firmly on the stomach. Ow. Victor's eyes zoomed downward.
"Put on a little weight, I see!" he said. "No matter! We'll get you back into shape in time for your first match."
Yuuri pulled his shirt down over his gut. Quidditch. Of course—this had something to do with Quidditch.
"Are...are you going to play Quidditch here now?" Yuuri asked him.
"Of course not," Victor laughed. "That wouldn't be fair, would it? I'm here to mentor you."
"Do the teachers know?" Yuuri asked stupidly.
Victor laughed again. It wasn't a mocking laugh, he just sounded...happy to be there, strange as it was. He relaxed back into the water and brushed the hair out of his eyes. He gestured next to himself, like he thought Yuuri should just undress and get into the onsen naked with him. Yeah, not likely.
"Oh yes," he said, casually waving his hand. "I had my parents ask for special permission for me to complete my last year of school here, and I took a year off from the Skrzak too."
Yuuri's heart stopped. Victor Nikiforov, taking a year off from the St Petersburg Skrzak? To come to Mahoutokoro? To mentor Yuuri?
"You got all the way out here," Victor continued. "Aren't you going to have a soak?"
"I... I just remembered!" Yuuri squeaked. "I'm hungry! Dinner is coming up soon!"
"Dinner?" said Victor, eyes widening. He stood up again and Yuuri closed his eyes tightly. "I love Japanese food! Lead the way down, I can barely remember how I got up here in the first place."
As soon as Victor had dressed (thank God), Yuuri led him numbly down the steps and into the courtyard. He was so distracted he almost left his broom outside the onsen (Victor had grabbed it and said "You're going to need this eventually!"). Victor chattered the whole way back into the school about anything and everything—cooing over the weather ("It's so warm!"), the foliage ("When do I get to see the sakura?"), even the stones of the castle ("Is it really made entirely out of jade?").
The silence when they entered the shokudou was oppressive. Every eye was turned toward them. Yuuri would've been more nervous about being the center of attention, except he felt very sure that absolutely no one was actually looking at him.
"So," he said to Victor, as quietly as he could. "um, I... I don't know what house you're supposed to be in but I eat over here with House Tanuki so..."
"They set me up in a futon next to yours. That means I'm in your house, no? I'll just eat with you."
Icy cold dread filled Yuuri's veins—Victor had been in his room already! What if he'd seen the posters?!
Victor followed him to his usual table. Yuuri all but collapsed onto the tatami mat, his knees thudding on the ground as he sat. Victor took a spot directly next to him, their legs touching. If he was going to have to eat a meal with Victor Nikiforov's thigh pressed against him, Yuuri wasn't sure he'd make it.
Even Seung-gil's substantial eyebrows had disappeared into his hairline. Yuuko's mouth was open so wide Yuuri privately thought she might soon begin attracting flies. Once Victor was seated, the whole of the student body began whispering intently to their neighbors. The room sounded like a hive of buzzing susumebachi. Yuuri was starting to think that a fate of being stung by a killer bee might be preferable to having to pretend to keep his cool while casually dining with his idol.
Phichit spoke first. "I see you found Yuuri!" he said, beaming in Yuuri's direction. Yuuri was absolutely certain Phichit could see Yuuri's internal freakout, and was kind of loving it. "Did you enjoy the onsen?"
"Oh my God," Victor said, eyes rolling back into his head in ecstasy (Yuuri tried not to think too hard about that), "the onsen! I'm going to spend every day in that hot spring. Forget classes!"
"So it's true?" Yuuko whispered. "You've left Durmstrang then? You're really going to finish school at Mahoutokoro?"
"Why not?" said Victor, shrugging. "I've heard only good things and I love it here so far. It's not even snowing!"
"It's September," Seung-gil butted in. "Why would it be snowing?"
"It's already snowing by the first of term every year at Durmstrang," Victor said. "We wear capes with our uniforms, even inside."
Just then, the food arrived. Katsudon! He would've been a lot more excited normally, but he wasn't really able to spare any emotions at the moment for anything else.
"Oooh!" Victor said, eyes widening at the steaming bowl of pork cutlets. "What's this?"
"Katsudon!" Yuuko exclaimed. "It's Yuuri's favorite dish!"
"Well then," Victor said with a smile, "I'm sure it'll be mine too."
His eyes rolled back into his head again with his first bite and Yuuri tried to resist the urge to bang his forehead against the table.
"Oh my God," Victor groaned. "You eat this every day? No wonder you gained weight. I'm going to turn into a little piggy too if you give me katsudon all the time."
Yuuko's shrieking giggle could be heard easily throughout the entire room, but Victor didn't seem to notice. He continued to shovel down the katsudon with gusto until the bowl was empty.
"Is there more?" he asked, turning to Yuuri.
"Just, um...tap your wand against the table," Yuuri told him.
Victor pulled out his wand—a long, thin black one with intricate silver inlays—and rapped it against the table. Yuuri couldn't take his eyes off it.
"What?" Victor asked. He followed Yuuri's gaze to his wand. "Do you like it?"
He handed his wand to Yuuri.
"What kind of wood is this?" Yuuri asked him. It was heavier than it looked.
"Ebony," Victor said, leaning in close, "and Veela hair. Do you use Veela hair in your wands here?"
Yuuri shook his head—he honestly had no idea what a Veela was, but didn't want to seem dumb by asking. He handed Victor's wand back to him before he accidentally broke it or something.
"What about yours?" Victor asked, reaching over into Yuuri's pocket as though he frequently started rummaging through other people's clothing and pulling out his wand.
"It's um...willow. Dragon heartstring," Yuuri stammered.
"Dragon heartstring, hmm?" said Victor, twirling the wand in his fingers. "They favor the passionate, you know."
Yuuri prayed for the sweet embrace of death as Victor returned his wand, obviously brushing fingers with him on purpose. Victor pocketed his own wand as another steaming bowl of katsudon nestled itself into the empty bowl in front of him.
Yuuri showed Victor the way to the House Tanuki dormitories after dinner. "You're going to have to walk me here every night," Victor warned him. "I never remember these things."
Victor made a beeline from the door, through the shoin, to the sliding doors leading into the dormitory. Yuuri did the best he could to squeeze past him. He was pretty sure he did some accidental magic in his haste to rip the posters off the wall. Once he had managed to shove them all under his bed, he looked past Victor and almost giggled.
At least fifteen huge suitcases were stacked three high, forming an almost impenetrable wall between Victor and Yuuri's futons and Takeshi's. It was like they had their own private room all to themselves.
"I couldn't help myself," Victor said, gesturing to the suitcases. "I collect clothes and I couldn't decide what I'd need so...I brought everything!"
"We usually wear uniforms," Yuuri told him.
"Even on the weekends?" Victor asked, plainly horrified.
"No," said Yuuri, "but..."
"What a relief," Victor breathed, dropping his jacket to the floor and collapsing back onto his futon, stretching out like a cat. Yuuri watched, mesmerized, as his shirt rode up to his chest and exposed his abs. "I can't even be me if I can't wear what I want."
Okay then.
"Where are your books?" Yuuri asked. "I can help...you know, get you ready for classes tomorrow."
"Oh!" said Victor, smacking his own forehead lightly. "I knew I forgot something!"
"You didn't bring any textbooks?" Yuuri said, trying not to let his jaw drop. He perched himself on the edge of his futon because his knees were still threatening to give out under the weight of just how unreal this all was.
"I can just share with you, right?" Victor smiled up at him, blue eyes twinkling. Yuuri was pretty sure he'd never be able to deny Victor anything if he was going to look at him like that.
"Of course," he squeaked, face reddening.
"How about," Victor suggested, sitting up and raking his eyes up and down Yuuri's body and not even trying to hide it, "we spend the rest of the evening here in the dormitory getting to know each other better?"
Yuuri stood up so fast that he could almost hear the blood rushing out of his head. He tried to take a step, tripped over Victor's jacket, and promptly fell flat on his face.
"Are you..." Victor started, but Yuuri was already on his feet again, edging slowly toward the sliding door.
"Fine!" Yuuri babbled. "I'm fine! I just...is that Yuuko calling me? I think it is!"
Yuuri slid out the door and shut it behind him, trying to catch his breath. He sped out of the shoin, past his concerned teammates who had gathered in the corner, and down the stairs leading away from the dormitories. He had just cleared the courtyard when he bumped bodily into someone and fell right onto his butt.
"Yuuri!" said Minako—she and Yuuri had long ago abandoned the pretense of titles. Relief flooded through Yuuri's body. "Are you alright? You look like you've seen a ghost?"
She reached out her arm and helped Yuuri to his feet.
"Want to come to my office?" she offered. "I've got some dead slugs that need pickling. Gotta scare those first years tomorrow."
Yuuri made a face.
"And for your trouble, how about some No-Maj mango Ramune? I brought over a case from home just so that I could bribe you into doing my bidding all year."
"Deal," Yuuri agreed immediately.
"So," Minako started once they'd reached her office, tossing Yuuri a pair of dragon hide gloves, "Victor Nikiforov, huh?"
"You have no idea," Yuuri muttered under his breath. "He says he's transferred from Durmstrang to mentor me as a Seeker."
"Wow," Minako whistled.
"He's going to be so disappointed when he realizes I'm nobody special," Yuuri said, giving voice to the fear fermenting in his gut.
"Don't be ridiculous," Minako replied, wrinkling her nose as she poured the dead slugs out onto a table. "I'm not saying he's not crazy, but he's not wasting his time either. I gotta say, I'm pretty excited—House Tanuki has that cup in the bag this year. Not that I'm taking sides, of course." Wink.
"You can't really think that," Yuuri said incredulously. "We have the same team as last year and after I screwed—"
"You can't really think that you'll lose with Victor Nikiforov mentoring you," Minako interrupted. She crossed her arms and stared at him.
"Look, he may be the best in the world—" Yuuri started.
"—that's not really up for debate—"
"—but I'm still me. I freeze up. I mess up. It's what I do." Yuuri's hand slipped as he spoke and slug carcasses spilled all over the floor. He looked up at Minako and raised his eyebrows. See?
"Yeah, I'm not convinced," she said, pulling out her wand and sending the slugs soaring neatly into the jar on her desk. Yuuri sank down into a chair. "I've known you since you were yea high and at no time have I ever seen evidence that you were a failure."
"You must've been drunk during last year's Quidditch Cup match then," Yuuri replied.
"Okay, that is up for debate," she admitted. "But what's not is you. Just because you have failed doesn't mean you always will. You're too hard on yourself and I've stopped trying to convince you otherwise because it's clearly a losing battle. What I can do is tell you I think you're awesome and you're worth every second of Victor's time. And also thanks for the help. Here's your Ramune." She handed him a bottle and steered him out the door. "I'm going to have a beer and then hit the hay. Good luck with Victor!"