August 4th, 2008

A/N: OMG, WTF?! What could have possibly possessed us to do this again after 3 years?? Instead of Vanilla Coke we are being influenced by alcohol (yes, all 32mm of it). This shall be fun. This will not end well.

SAY WHAT?! WE HAVE TO FIGHT WHO?! Chapter 3

-Last time…sort of-

Shizuru then smirked and dragged the still crying Kuwabara screaming and kicking away to bash his head in. …Ow.

-Now-

"Noooooo! Let me gooooo! I have to save my beautiful Yukina from herself! Wah!" Kuwabara wailed.

"What about me!?" The older Kuwabara proceeded to kick the younger in the head; "Your battle is with me now so pay attention!"

"Yukinaaaaaaaaaaa-----------!"

"You're not listening stupid!" Cue more pummeling. After taking a good deal of aggression out Shizuru smirked down at him. "Now stand up and face me like a man, punk!"

Kuwabara actually stopped wailing for Yukina for two whole seconds (yes two) to look up from his position on the floor and stutter indignantly, "B-But I can't fight you!! You're a girl!"

Shizuru deadpanned. "I'm destroying the world."

"Yeah---"

"I'm the enemy."

"Uh-huh."

"As in the bad guy?"

"And?"

"You're supposed to stop the bad guys, right?"

"Yes…."

"So stand up and fight me already!?!"

"NOO!"

"Dammit!! Why NOT?!"

"Because you're a girl! I can't fight girls! I'm an honorable man!"

"You're an idiot." And then this is when Shizuru had a brilliant thought. "Wait…there's another reason you don't want to fight me isn't there?"

Kuwabara looked almost afraid. With shifty eyes he replied not very convincingly, "Nooo…"

"Kazuma." Shizuru said pointedly.

"Yes?"

"TELL ME!!!"

Kuwabara screamed and cowered in fear. LOTS of fear. "Because you're a girl, b-but-but you're also my sister. MY OLDER SISTER! And no matter what you'll kick the crap out of me even more as soon as we get home!"

Shizuru gave a satisfied smirk, "This is why you are pussy whipped, (oh snap! Hit below the belt!) Why no one ever takes you seriously, (ouch! Two low blows!) And why everyone makes fun of you on fanfiction forums! (ugh, make that three!)"

Kuwabara simply could not take all the blows to his self-esteem and masculinity and curled into a ball, crying like a five-year-old girl.

Shizuru felt it was time to show her poor ears some mercy by putting Kuwabara out of his misery. She proceeded to bash his head in until unconsciousness was apparent. Then she decided to drag his lifeless (though not dead) body over to a corner and tie him to a tree.

Her job done, Shizuru clapped her hands to get the dirt and caked blood off her hands. "Today was a gratifying day." She gave one last look at her brother before walking and saying to no one in particular, "This match was won before it even started."

--Moral of this chapter—

Sibling rivalry is tough, very tough love. Also, older sisters just win. Period. …until that little brother you've been picking on all their life turns eighteen and is two hundred pounds of muscle looking for payback. That's the time to run away screaming. –Unless you are one Shizuru Kuwabara.

A/N: Man that was hard. Kuwabara did not make things easy for us since he refused to fight, and it is hard to write a fight scene without any fighting. Now we know the frustration. :(

F.Y.I. We really like Kuwabara actually. Really. Honestly. No joke. We will also admit it is extremely easy to make fun of him, and we simply couldn't resist. We blame whatever is messing with out caffeine levels.

Last Note: We hope to get another chapter out before three and half years pass. No promises though. :D

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