This chapter's in two scenes and I wrote them while listening to particular songs, so I don't know if you wanted to find them or anything? Just in case, the first half was Luminous by Lensko, you'll know which point I mean ;) and in the second half, where the two are talking about a particular song (again, you'll know) it was In un'altra vita by Ludovico Einaudi. It captures pretty much what I was going for.
The music in the club was vibrating through Beca's chest before they'd even made it through the door, and once they were in she immediately felt her body begin to move to the beat without even thinking about it. From the corner of her eye she caught Sabine doing exactly the same and grinned – this had definitely been a good idea and she gave herself a triumphant pat on the back.
After agreeing to Sabine's date, Beca had suggested going that night as it was a Saturday and neither had to be in the studio over the weekend. It had seemed like perfect timing so they agreed and parted ways to ready themselves for the evening. The brunette had agreed to let Sabine choose their dinner venue on the proviso that she could sort the after-dinner entertainment. Sabine had nodded once, smirking at something Beca couldn't fathom but she didn't linger on it for long as she had a serious amount of getting ready to do. There was an unspoken agreement between the two that what was to come afterwards was to be put aside for the night, and they were to enjoy themselves without any brooding.
And so here she was, three hours of prep and a gorgeous candlelit dinner later, a stunning blonde on her arm (who was turning the heads of everyone in the vicinity, she noted with a hint of jealousy), tugging her date to the bar and setting them up with cocktails and a small line of shots each. Sabine gave Beca a deadpan look and raised her eyebrows. Beca grinned, mouthing 'What?' and Sabine moved in so that her lips were right by the other woman's ear.
"Are you trying to get me drunk maus?"
Beca feigned innocence and pretended to be offended. "As if I would?" Sabine gave her that all-too-familiar smirk and knocked back all of the shots and her cocktail within minutes, before leaning in again, her breath sugary and intoxicating now.
"You should know I hold my drinks very well, meine maus. Good luck!" And she winked as she drew back, licking the excess sweetness of her drinks from her lips before starting to weave her hips seductively to the music throbbing around them, arms held out to signal for her petite date to join her. Beca gulped a little at the sight and quickly nailed her own drinks, slid from her stool and joined her sultry temptress. Hands held tightly, they wove through the crowd to the dance floor and began to move together, allowing the music to guide them. Beca found herself lost in the base, the natural dancer in her coming to life and moving her body in a way that was totally alien to her at any other point in her life. Her eyes closed and she felt herself smile in enjoyment at the feeling of freedom, until warm fingers wrapped around her hips firmly, bringing her senses back to the woman who was now pressed behind her, dancing in perfect rhythm with her. She grinned, knowing that she'd made the right choice in outfit – a very fitted black lace number, with an open back that showed off her now-impressive skin art to perfection, and absolutely killer heels that did wonders for her ass (even she had to admit that), finished with her hair pinned up on one side and swept over the opposite shoulder in wide auburn curls. Likewise, Sabine had arrived to their date dressed to kill, in a navy blue playsuit that showcased her endless legs stunningly and contrasted beautifully with her skin tone. Her hair was braided into a fauxhawk, make-up flawless and smoky, silver heels and a crisp white blazer to finish the look. Beca had been left speechless when she first saw Sabine, who'd laughed and gently lifted her hanging jaw shut. Despite Beca feeling there was no way she could ever compete with that and make herself desirable to Sabine, here was the goddess herself, running her hands over her like there was no one else she would ever want in the whole world.
The club was heating up and the two women were dancing relentlessly to each track that came on, getting closer and closer until one track faded in that made Beca jump up and down in excitement, accidentally crushing Sabine's foot with one of her towering heels. She apologised profusely, face bright red in embarrassment as Sabine doubled over in pain, but moments later her date was laughing, straightening up to grasp the brunette's face in both of her hands.
"It's okay liebling, honestly! Maybe don't do it again though, ja?" She yelled over the music. Beca nodded, mortified. She leaned in to make herself heard better.
"I'm so sorry, I just got really excited...this is my track! I'm surprised they still play it!"
Sabine turned her face to Beca's, looking seriously impressed. "This is yours? It is fantastich!" She called, slipping into German by mistake as she tried to make herself heard. Beca ducked her head, grinning at the compliment and shrugged.
"Ah its okay I guess!" She responded in a shout. "I used to DJ here a lot while I was still a grunt at the studio, they must have kept a few of my tracks!"
Sabine smiled at her excitement and grabbed Beca again, pulling her close. "Let's dance then, to my maus's music." She breathed in the brunette's ear, making her knees go weak at the sensation of warm hands on the bare skin of her back, tracing the tattooed skin delicately. She ran her tongue over her suddenly dry lips and nodded, laying her arms over Sabine's shoulders and linking her hands together around her neck. The German woman smiled and closed her eyes in apparent bliss, leaning their foreheads together and moving to the beats of Beca's own music.
If anyone had told a sexually flustered young Beca all those years ago at the Worlds that one day the object of her obsession would be dancing with her in a club to her own music she'd have had them on the next bus to the funny farm. But here she was, pressed against the absolute goddess who was caressing her and winding her hips tantalisingly against her own, stirring fiery desire to life with each base pulse. Beca thanked her lucky stars that she'd had the foresight to make this track a little longer than average.
She found herself staring into Sabine's pale blue cat-like eyes as they danced, watching the way they glinted under the strobe lighting. Her gaze moved to the high cheekbones that looked as though they could cut a man at twenty paces, highlighted to perfection, and then down to her lips. They looked like velvet and good enough to eat. She caught her own bottom lip between her teeth as warmth rose in her and she realised she was staring way too much. She turned her head away in embarrassment, knowing Sabine would have caught her ogling so blatantly. This might be a date, but it was a first date, with a woman that she realistically knew very little about if their conversation that morning had been anything to go by. Her thoughts were interrupted a moment later when feather-light fingers guided her back to face the blonde and she looked up once more into those glittering eyes. Sabine stared at her, projecting a silent question through the hot, beat-heavy air and Beca suddenly had a rush of understanding. She nodded once, faintly and the other woman closed the space between them, pressing her lips to Beca's. The brunette felt herself melt against her body then, her senses igniting at the sensation of Sabine's hot, impossibly soft kiss. Time slowed to a standstill in that moment, everything around them ceasing to exist. Beca's hands dropped to Sabine's hips and pulled her closer, wanting to feel the other woman as close to her as possible. She gave a tiny, almost imperceptible moan into Beca's lips and the brunette took a chance at that point to test the waters further and run her tongue along Sabine's, pushing the kiss deeper. She wasn't rejected, in fact her blonde goddess reciprocated slowly, languidly (god that word just summed up the all-sorts of sexy that this woman was, reflected Beca at the back of her mind). As they kissed, while Sabine was responding with as much desire as Beca was putting in, the smaller woman was surprised to realise that she was the one taking the lead – she'd always had the impression that this woman was one to take charge in any situation, sexual exploits being no exception. But despite her initiating the kiss, Beca was now the one running the sexy-time show.
Not that she was complaining, because she was ready to commit all kinds of sin with this angel's body. She smiled into their kiss at the thought and broke away from Sabine's lips to move her her neck, thankful for both heels and the fact that there wasn't as much of a height difference between them as she'd first thought. Sabine had turned her head slightly so that Beca could lay kisses all down the smooth column of her neck, inhaling the soft cinnamon-laced perfume as she went. Of all the things that had changed about this wondrous woman, her intoxicating scent hadn't. She grazed her teeth lightly against the rapid pulse just beneath Sabine's jaw and felt the hiss of breath, hands tightening around her waist and the skin under her own fingers heating up rapidly. Beca kissed back down to her collarbone and bit softly on the plush skin of another pulse point, while trailing her hands from Sabine's hips to the hem of her shorts. She ran her fingers lightly over the silky thighs, feeling goosebumps erupt as the blonde shivered; feeling particularly bold then, she slipped her hands under the hem of her playsuit shorts and found the divinely soft swell of her ass. She couldn't help but squeeze her fingers into the pliable flesh, eliciting a sharp gasp from the other woman. Sabine gripped Beca's hips then and quickly flipped her around so that she was pressed against the brunette's back. The smaller woman protested briefly at the loss of contact but Sabine moved them to the rhythm of the music once again and began to kiss down Beca's neck as she'd done to the blonde just moments before. Her hands started to run up the front of her lace dress and found the low split in the front, briefly dancing over the surface before gently sliding her fingers under the flimsy material to caress the bare breast she found underneath. Deft fingers kneaded the skin and began to tease a nipple, causing Beca to throw her head back over Sabine's shoulder, her breathy moans right in line with Sabine's ear. The blonde bit gently on Beca's earlobe and pulled the other woman tighter against her, grinding her hips against her seductively.
"Naughty maus!" she chided softly, though Beca somehow heard it over the chaos of the club. "I wonder, have you left all of your underwear at home?" long, elegant fingers ran over the skin-tight surface of the dress and she almost purred. "Hmm...it seems maybe you have." Beca reached up with one hand and pushed their lips together again, harshly this time in a kiss that was blazing with desire. 'Fuck it' she thought 'if this is the only chance I'll get then I'm gonna make the most of it!' She moved to breathlessly speak into Sabine's ear.
"Oh no, how careless of me. Maybe we need to go back and find it then…?"
Sabine turned enough that she could look into Beca's navy eyes, saw them darkened to the colour of midnight with pure desire. She gave a small grin, her own eyes glinting darkly too. The two women had quickly come to the same level of understanding, despite their past awkwardness. Beca suddenly stood up straight, grabbed Sabine's hand and dragged her from the nightclub.
Piano music played softly in the background and candles lit Sabine's skin to a glorious honey glow. Beca gazed over the smooth back that she was tracing lazy patterns onto, before worshipping it with another butterfly-soft kiss. The woman underneath her hummed and stretched then, turning to face Beca and smiling peacefully. In that moment she looked as though every care in the world had fallen from her shoulders and it left Beca a little breathless at how beautiful she was.
Sabine reached a hand out and caressed Beca's face softly. "What are you thinking, liebling?" Her voice was so soft, full of peace. The brunette let herself smile at her.
"Just that you're the most heavenly thing I've ever seen." She leaned down as Sabine laughed at the corny statement, capturing the blonde's mouth in a slow, deep kiss. They sighed against each other and Beca curled up against Sabine's side. They were naked in her bed, a sheet thrown carelessly over their lower halves; much fun had been had in that bed tonight and Beca grinned at the memories already resurfacing. It had been everything she'd dreamed about, and then more. Wild, unbridled passion, heat, fighting for dominance. But then the second time was slower, more observant of each other's bodies and responses, drawing out the pleasure gradually to make the peak of release more heady. Sabine certainly knew her way around a woman, that was for sure. And Beca was pretty sure she'd given at least as good as she got. As the vision next to her gave another deep sigh of contentment, Beca rested her head on her shoulder and resumed her skin-tracing, on the woman's front this time.
They lay in comfortable silence, listening to Beca's playlist as it wound through the peace of the room, neither feeling the need to break the silence just yet. They kept glancing at each other, little smiles of silliness flashing across their mouths each time they did. Beca nuzzled Sabine's shoulder as she ran her fingers over the curves and lines of the other woman. She let her gaze drift over the velvet skin, watching muscles twitch here and there as she discovered ticklish spots, making her chuckle quietly now and again. Her hand drifted over a sharp hipbone, and she leaned over and kissed it gently, then settled her head on the soft stomach of her goddess. How she loved calling her that, even if it was only in her own head. More softness ran under her fingers as she closed her eyes briefly, so that she could focus only on touch.
Beca's eyes drifted open as she felt something rough under her fingertips. Looking along the plane of Sabine's abdomen she saw the scar she thought she'd spotted before, able to look at it fully now. It ran horizontally from the base of one hipbone to the other, flat and thin making her think it must be fairly old at least. She frowned a little and traced it softly a few times over, feeling the texture of it, scar tissue knotted underneath when she applied a little pressure to it. She felt Sabine raise her head from the pillow.
"Maus…?"
And now, here was where it was to end. Beca could feel it, sinking into her like a stone dropping into a fathomless lake. She wasn't ready for this yet, she realised, and so she diverted. She saved her last kiss for the scar she'd been idly stroking, and then got up from the bed. She saw Sabine sit up and begin to wrap the sheet around herself, her expression tight now. She lightly touched her arm, knowing the woman was thinking of the deal they'd made.
"I'm going to get us some drinks, stay there gorgeous." Throwing on the sleep shirt that had been abandoned on the chair in the corner, she wandered out to the kitchenette. She returned after several minutes, bearing two tumblers of amber liquid. Without a word, she offered one to Sabine who took it and gave it a long look. "It's whisky." Reassured Beca, taking a sip of her own and feeling it slide easily down her throat. She closed her eyes and sighed. "A damn fine one, actually."
Sabine raised her glass in a silent toast to Beca and took a measured sip, nodding her head at the pleasant mustiness of the aged single malt. "That is good." She agreed, after allowing it to warm her. She sat on the edge of the bed, cradling the glass in her hands and staring into space. Beca approached and knelt on the floor in front of her, placing her glass on the night stand so that she could rub her hands gently up and down Sabine's thighs to try and soothe her out of her sudden tenseness. They sat like that for a long moment, the blonde trying to sort her thoughts and the brunette wishing they weren't needing to do this. She decided to voice as much.
"Y'know Sabine, I won't hold you to our deal. Tonight has been amazing and I-" but Sabine cut her off with a shake of her head and took another sip of her whisky.
"Nein liebling. I made a promise to you. And...it's about time. I suppose if I'm honest with you then perhaps I can begin to be honest with myself too."
Beca's heart was beginning to beat faster, wondering what on earth she was about to hear. She took a deep breath and prepared to say...something, anything that would preserve the night, but just then her playlist changed and Sabine stiffened as they both heard her track begin to play. Track six, the one they hadn't yet been able to sort out.
It was still in the rough edit stage but the sound was beautiful nonetheless, the opening melody sweet and simple, softly hopeful in its tone. "Shit!" Beca muttered, moving to turn it off, but Sabine's hand stopped her suddenly. "I'm sorry, I keep the work files on there too, the playlist must be on auto I didn't think..." She wasn't about to admit to the other woman that the song was on a playlist because she listened to it every night to get herself to sleep. That she kept it to hear the voice she had come to crave like a drug. She looked up at Sabine; the woman hadn't moved, but her hand was still on Beca's arm, keeping her still. Her gaze was unfocussed as she let the melody wash over her but her eyes were glistening with tears. Beca frowned.
"Sabie…?" She asked, quietly uncertain. The other woman looked down to her then, a single tear dropping from her lower lashes onto her cheek and rolling down her face. Beca felt it drip onto her own skin but she was rooted in place from shock. What was happening? Sabine took a deep breath and her voice was low and rough then, as she tried to talk through the vast sea of emotions washing through her.
"I'm sorry Beca." She said simply, looking away again. "I didn't mean to...I-I haven't heard the song played back before."
Beca was shocked. "Ever?" She asked. The other woman shook her head in the negative.
"Not ever, no. When I recorded the demo, I just sent it straight out. During recording, I've let everyone else deal with it and simply tell me what to do with it. I only know what I hear when I play it. This..." She waved her hand to indicate the swelling music, but found she hadn't the words to continue. She put her face in her hands and Beca could hear her breathing deeply to try and compose herself. She felt she should do something for Sabine, but she had no idea where to start with that. Before her dilemma reached fever pitch however, the blonde had removed her hands and set them resolutely on her knees, straightening her back and looking like she'd come to some sort of conclusion. This was it, Beca could sense it. There was no going back.
"I never told you the name of this track, did I?" She asked. Beca shook her head in the negative. Sabine's smile then was infinitely sad as she continued. "It's called Lullaby." Beca paused, tilting her head to listen to the music and slowly nodded as she matched the name to it, feeling that it was right in every sense.
Sabine took a deep breath. "I wrote it..."
Beca was staring at her expectantly. Both women held their breath as an eternity ticked by. And then Sabine finished in little more than a whisper.
"I wrote it for my son."