CHAPTER THREE

She was sitting on a bed in her room; moonlight dripped through the window, the thin curtains filtering out the imperfections. The night was nearly silent, the exception being the billowing of the cotton that separated the outside air from the warm atmosphere within the safe confines of the stone walls.

She held hands with the man to her right, his hands stronger and warmer than her own thin and gentle ones. She leaned her head against the man's shoulder and continued to gaze at the open window, the chilly autumn breeze jostling the white drapes as she placed her other hand on his arm, tracing small circles on his forearm.

"We shouldn't be doing this," came the man's voice - it sounded smooth, deep, and worried, and she imagined his face wearing a light frown, rather than the scowl it usually held. Her fingers glided down to their hands and she held his in both of hers. He twitched slightly, a little surprised by the action, but not overly so.

She shifted her head too look at him, and smiled, lovingly, gently, before leaning forward and pecking his cheek quickly. His expression softened and a small smile tugged on his lips as well as he gazed down at her.

"If you want to stop, we can," she murmured in reply. His eyes met with hers and she noticed sadness, pain and reluctance swimming in small, discreet circles within his pale orbs. This saddened her, to see such a reaction. They both knew the gravity of the situation they had placed themselves in, and they had known even before it had happened.

He didn't respond for a moment, simply leaning his own head on hers, before placing one of his hands on her leg, rubbing softly with his thumb, almost in consolation.

"It's selfish of me to want to stay like this," he whispered, and took in the scent of her pale hair. He sat up straight, and cupped her cheek with one hand, the other placed on her arm, his grip tighter than intended, giving off an air of desperation. "...but let me be selfish, just this once...I understand that I don't deserve to be in this position, but..." He trailed off and looked away, refraining from completing his sentence. Guilt was the only thing that greeted him when he tried to express how he felt.

He began to draw his hand away from her face, but she quickly grasped onto it, startling him, before holding his hand, just as she had been before.

"░░░░░░...look at me," she commanded, and he complied, bringing his gaze back to hers. Her expression was that of sadness, worry and, ever so slightly, determination - determination to achieve her goal, no matter what it would take. "You don't understand how this makes me feel, to see you so hopelessly despaired by something so...so ridiculous!"

She yanked his arm, pulling him closer to her, her nose barely a centimeter away from his own. She let go of his wrist, before cupping both of his cheeks with her hands, making sure he knew he couldn't get away.

"Don't you dare think that you do not deserve to be by my side - if anything, it should be the other way around. You have rescued me countless times, fought for my mediocre desires and wishes, and convinced the head to let you stay here with me. You have gone to such lengths for me, while I have done nothing in return. All I have to offer is the person I am, and the body I possess. I have no talent or knack for battle, and no courage when facing danger." She paused to take a breath before continuing. "You were the one who taught me Magecraft, you were the one who explained the War to me, you were the one who, no matter how many times I annoyed you, bothered you and nagged you, always stayed with me. You deserve much better than the frail, weak woman before you."

He opened his mouth to protest, but she gave him no chance to speak. "░░░░░░, you can be selfish - take what you want, take everything if you so wish, you could take everything from me, from my family, and I would forgive you." Her hands slid from his cheeks, to his neck, before wrapping her arms around it. She was embracing him now, trying to convey her emotions the best she could. "You already know that I love you, with all my heart and soul; I will let you do anything, because no matter what you do, I will support you and aid you to the best of my ability."

He sat there, slightly stupefied by her words, eyes trailed down at her in shock and surprise.

"Please..." she met eyes with him again. "Please be selfish. It's the only way I'll be able to repay you for everything you've done for me, the widowed woman who lived in despair and hatred until you saved her. Do not be afraid to speak your mind to me; no matter what you say, how I perceive you will not change. Do whatever will make you feel comfortable, happy, perhaps at home - it pains me to see you like this, afraid to express yourself because of your insecurities."

He felt his chest burst with a slight warmth as she spoke, heart beating stronger with every word. Yes, he could be selfish. He could be carefree. He could say what he wanted, though he didn't want to, to keep her from worrying about him. She didn't deserve to be involved with a monster such as himself. She deserved a more refined, pure and capable person who could treat her better than he had been. But she had stated he could, he could do all those things.

"...▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓, thank you..." He slowly wrapped his burly arms around her small frame and relaxed as she smiled with a small giggle. "I will...try to be more selfish from now on...

"I love you."

Rin woke up with a start, almost throwing her blanket off the bed, onto the innocent wallpaper and wardrobe, both of whom had done nothing wrong and had been sitting silent and still the entire night. Breathing heavily, her eyes shakily took in her surroundings before her hands fell onto her lap. She had to admit, she was surprised by the dream – she didn't think she was the type to have romance dreams, but apparently she had proven herself wrong.

Who was that, though? Who was the man she had been speaking to? Who had she been speaking as? Possibilities rushed through her mind, before she came to the annoying realization that she could not remember what the man's face nor body looked like. The only thing she could recall were his large, warm hands and the soft air he'd given off.

What did he look like?

The question shook her to a frustrating degree, but Rin forced herself to shake it off by slapping her own cheeks and getting out of bed. Maybe she would ask Shirou about it later, to see if he knew anything about this. The dream felt too real to be simply a dream. The brunette lazed over to the dresser that stood beside her bed, and leaned down slightly to look in the mirror, and scowled lightly at her messy hair and disheveled appearance.

She could think about her weird night encounters later; for now, she had to focus on making herself actually presentable, and place herself in good spirits. Opening her luggage, she scaled her eyes over the contents before pulling out what could be considered her usual outfit – a white turtleneck, and a dark brown skirt that reached a bit past her knees. She stripped herself of her pyjamas, quickly replacing them with her day clothes and returned her gaze to the mirror.

Rin ran her fingers through her messy hair, and winced when they came across a knot. Digging around for a moment, she managed to find her brush and patiently began to untangle her dark locks. She was looking less like a bush by the minute. Once she was satisfied, she tied her hair into a somewhat sloppy pony-tail, made her bed and was out the door.

The early morning light gently peeked into the hallway through the sliding doors and she smiled a little as the nostalgia hit her in small waves. It felt like just yesterday, when she was here with Shirou as high school students, fighting in the Fifth Holy Grail War, with their respective Servants. She was, without a doubt, glad it was over, but there were, naturally, things she missed from when they were involved in such a disaster.

She missed her Servant, Shirou's Servant, the excitement and emotions that had swum within her as they encountered their enemies, but in the end, it was better that it had come to a close. After all, that would mean that it, if the Grail acted as it had before, would start the War maybe fifty years from now. Less innocents would die, and by then, surely Magus would have become more advanced and better at, specifically, "not including innocents in such an atrocious event." But, as the head of a noble, in its own way, Magus family, she had plenty of first-hand experience with how uncaring, arrogant and corrupted most Magus were.

Caught up in self-importance, and overly prideful, often taking offense to the most minor things. The likelihood of them actually trying not to involve others in the War was unlikely, they were more likely to not care who they involved, unless it was a non-Magecraft user, in which case they would have to kill the witness.

As she quietly sauntered down the hall, she offhandedly recalled when Shirou had seen her Servant and another Servant battling, resulting in Shirou's death – though she revived him later. Since he was assumed to be a non-Magecraft user, and someone who was not involved, it was by the rules that he would have to be killed. Tracing her fingertips along the wall, Rin sighed ever so slightly and followed the hall into the dining room, the only room she could confidently say she was familiar with.

Enjoying the silence, she sat down by the table and almost subconsciously, her eyes trailed to the empty seat beside her – one that had used to be occupied by a dear friend of hers, but he was now absent, and had been for what would soon be half her life.

"You're up early," Rin jumped in surprise and whirled her head around to see Shirou standing behind her, with a friendly smile. She took note of the pleasant-to-the-eye blue yukata, varying in shades, Japanese clouds sprinkled across the surface of the cloth, with a white obi that matched both his hair and eye colors quite well. "I hope you aren't too jetlagged – if you're still tired, feel free to go back to sleep at any point."

She returned his smile, in more of a smirk, and waved for him to sit down. He complied, but not in the seat beside her, or directly in front of her, but in the seat just to the right of the one across from her. Rin took note of this, but didn't mention it. "I appreciate the offer, and it's tempting, but the sooner I try to adapt, the sooner I'll get used to the time zone. Besides, I wanted to see the house again, when it's the crack of dawn. Memories, and all that cheesy stuff," Rin waved her hand up and down at him, extracting a short chuckle.

"Well, it's not as if I can tell you to get some rest, so I'll let you decide whether or not you need it." Shirou had a much different air about him than she was used to, since she had seen him last when they'd met up in a hotel somewhat near the Korean hospital Hajime had been being held in. Perhaps being a father for nearly two, or three (she couldn't remember) months had changed him, for better or worse.

"When does little Hajime wake up?" Rin asked, and Shirou perked upon hearing his daughter's name. There was a little sparkle in his previously blank, silver eyes and his smile softened to one of genuine happiness. She was a bit surprised by this, but then again, both him and Hajime had rescued each other in their own ways, so she should have expected such intimacy between them, no matter how short their time spent together was.

"I'll wake her up in maybe another five minutes. I usually wake up a bit later than now to make breakfast, but seeing as we have yet another mouth to feed, it'll take more time to cook something up."

Her brow twitched. "I'm not sure if I should take that as a joke or as an insult."

"Take it however you'd like," he sent her an amused look, before leaning on the table and gazing at her intently. "Has the Clock Tower been treating you alright?"

"Alright, yes," she nodded, "Not much has changed, but Lord El-Meloi II has seemed to take some interest in me. After all, he did take part in the first half of the Fifth Holy Grail War." Shirou hummed at this, before standing.

"Tea?" Rin nodded. "Alright – you can keep talking, I can hear you from the kitchen."

"Other than his increasing interest, nothing particularly eventful has happened. Honestly, going on lectures is somewhat stressful, but once it's over you realize how much you've actually explained to the students and how much you've helped them. It's a great feeling when they participate in class and do well on their assessments, knowing you succeeded in doing your job." She paused for a moment. "Father, his job wasn't one that I knew too much about, but as far as I knew, his only so called 'job' was to be rich, spread his name, and grab at anything he could get."

Shirou hummed again, assuring her he'd been paying attention, as he poured hot water into the teapot.

"Well, how about you? I'm curious about Hajime and what's been going on with her," Rin changed the topic slightly, seeing an awkward silence fast approaching.

"Ah, yes," he turned around, carrying a tray, with their teapot and tea cups placed on it. "As you could probably imagine, I've told her about Magecraft, and the Holy Grail War and its dangers. She hasn't taken particular interest in learning Magecraft just yet, which is understandable, seeing as she still wants to learn more about the world she both forgot, and didn't know about before." Shirou placed down the tea and poured some into their cups, steam rising from them. "She has also been picking up on Japanese rather quickly – she should be able to speak a decent amount by the end of this year, but written Japanese will take longer.

"As for school, I'll be enrolling her when the next academic year begins, since it'd be good to place her in an area where she can interact with others and learn with them. She's six, so it is required anyways, seeing as she's a resident of Japan now." Rin nodded at this, silently thanking her friend as she reached for the tea and winced when she touched it. The cup was a lot hotter than she had anticipated. "Also, Fuji's coming over really soon, I think I forgot to tell you."

Rin blinked in surprise. "Fujimura's visiting as well?"

"Ha-ha…after calling her about Hajime, she demanded she come and see her," Shirou explained sheepishly and the brunette shook her head at him, both amused and slightly frustrated. The white haired man took a final sip of his tea and stood up. "Speaking of Hajime, I should wake her soon, it's eight seventeen."

Rin nodded and waved her hand towards the door, shooing him. He playfully huffed at her before leaving the room with a small chuckle, closing the door behind him.

Walking down the hallway, he heard the faint slapping of feet in the short distance and smiled lightly – she must already be awake. Shirou opened the door to their room and, as he had predicted, Hajime was shuffling through the lowest drawer in their dresser, which was full of her clothes. She looked up when she heard the door slide open and a bright grin spread across her small face.

"G'morning, Daddy!" Hajime abandoned the messy drawer to run over to her father and hug his legs. The white haired man crouched down a little so he could lift her into his arms and place her on his bed.

" 'G'morning' to you too, kiddo," Shirou patted her small head and she leaned into his hand as he petted her hair. "Let's get you dressed – one of Daddy's friends is going to be with us for a while and I want to introduce the two of you," he explained and Hajime nodded once with a somewhat serious expression to show she understood, but to Shirou it looked like a mix between a pout and a frown. He raised a brow in confusion before scooting himself over to the bottom drawer to see whether or not his daughter had made a complete mess out of it.

It wasn't a wreck, but it would be a lie to say it was orderly. It seemed as if Hajime had been taking the folded clothes, inspected them without unfolding them, before placing them somewhere else in the dresser drawer as not to be asked to re-fold her clothes later. He sighed, carefully sorting through the various types of clothes before taking out a simple yukata for her to wear indoors – it was very unlikely that they would be going outside today, and even if they were, it wouldn't be terribly strange for a child to be walking with her parent in a yukata. It may be twenty twenty-five, but yukata were still somewhat in fashion and the culture was just barely managing to survive in the hearts of the modern generations and sharply decreasing birth rates.

And since he was a child of the "old generation," it wouldn't be overly surprising if he himself wore a yukata, since it was somewhat of an unspoken stereotype for his generation to wear traditional and out-of-fashion clothes.

But mind you, Shirou was well aware of all the latest fashion trends in Fuyuki, as well as Japan and Tokyo. He also got himself up to date on the culture of Korea and the now-on-lockdown China, to be sure he could accurately and correctly teach her about the country she used to live in before he found her in the rubble. He'd ordered a few more books to help her learn Japanese, as well as a few children's Hangul, Mandarin and English books. He wanted to make sure she knew some useful languages before she became a teenager, since he had no doubt in his mind that at some point she would be off and studying abroad – from what he could tell about her, she was the adventurous type; then again, she was still a child and therefore still had a long time to develop her character.

He closed the drawer before walking over to Hajime and sitting himself down beside her, placing the red yukata behind himself and helping her take off her pyjamas. After a slight struggle with her shirt (Shirou made a mental note to get her a larger one, as she seemed to be outgrowing her pyjama top), he stood her up and put the yukata on her, pulling the sleeves over her arms and tying a slightly make-shift-ish obi, really just a cherry oak brown sash, around her waist and brushing her hair.

When Shirou had first started this whole routine, he really couldn't deny that he didn't really want to do it at first, but once it started to happen over and over each day, he got used to it and grew to look forward to it.

"Hey Daddy?" Hajime's small voice brought his attention to her as he ran the brush through her tangled locks of black hair.

"Hm?"

"You don't know my old name, right?"

Shirou was a bit taken aback by the sudden question - she'd never asked anything related to her old life before since they left the hospital.

"No, I don't."

"…I see."

The two of them fell into a somewhat comfortable silence, though the sound of birds beginning to sing outside and the metal bristles working against the knots in her hair remained. A few moments later, Shirou pulled a strawberry orange hair band off his wrist and tied her hair into a pony tail, before patting her head and standing up.

"C'mon kiddo," he encouraged her and she smiled up at him again, grabbing onto two fingers of his offered hand and they walked down the hallway together. Shirou's arm was jerked downwards softly at the consistent tempo of Hajime's happy skipping, and he smiled as well, though slightly more wistfully than his daughter.

He'd never expected to feel this familiar wave of happiness once more; it felt refreshing, like brand new realization of something he had been questioning all his life. Perhaps Shirou was over exaggerating to himself, but the more the better – that way he could always remember to be with his daughter and, rather than save everyone, simply save her. He could not get his wish to save all the people of the world, but the feeling of being able to save only one person was devastating yet filled with light and hope.

Realizing they had arrived back in the 'dining room,' Shirou gently let go of Hajime's hand to open the door for the both of them. His silver eyes swept over the room before finally settling on Rin, gazing curiously at Hajime, who happened to be staring right back.

"Err – hello, you must be Hajime," the woman began rather awkwardly. Shirou almost pitied her for the look of nervousness that crossed her face.

"Uh-huh, you Daddy's friend," Hajime grabbed onto her father's yukata with one hand, the other clenching her own tightly, looking down at her feet. The brown haired woman scared her a little – she didn't seem friendly and warm like her father, rather, serious and cold-eyed like some of the other children who sat in her hospital room.

Rin blinked in confusion, hearing the somewhat broken and lightly accented Japanese. It took her a second to remember that the girl who stood before her was not Japanese like her name implied, but one of the few survivors of the battle in Pyongyang; a Korean girl who didn't know much about the world because she lost her memories.

"I'm Rin, it's nice to meet you," she tried her best to use the simplest Japanese she knew to ensure that the two of them could communicate effectively, and her lips twitched upwards when the young girl's eyes sparkled faintly.

"Nice to meet you Miss Rin," Hajime nodded, her gaze still not meeting the older woman's. Shirou smiled softly and crouched down to his daughter's height and patted her head.

"Why don't you sit down next to Rin so I can go make breakfast?" Shirou suggested gently and Hajime nodded obediently, walking with a spring in her step over to Rin and sitting in the seat directly beside the female Magus.

The two sat in silence before Rin decided to break through the tense air. "Your name is Hajime, isn't it?"

The girl in question looked up at her and nodded.

"How old are you?"

Hajime paused, holding out her fingers and counting in a language Rin didn't understand, but she assumed it was Korean. The girl turned back to Rin before pausing again, realizing she didn't know how to say all the numbers in Japanese. "Uhm…" Hajime looked back to her hands and counted on her fingers before displaying all five fingers of her left hand and the index of her right.

"You're very young, aren't you?" Rin tried to remain patient with the child. Usually Japanese children of Hajime's age, from what she had experienced so far, also whom she'd met more of than children from any other country besides England, would already know how to speak full, complete, informal sentences and say the numbers without too much of a problem.

But since Hajime did not fluently speak Japanese, nor knew much about the culture, or any culture for that matter, she had to try to understand the child's situation and shape her own attitude to fit Hajime's. Otherwise the friendly relationship she wanted would not be created.

"M-hm," Hajime nodded her head. Her expression was growing more and more cheerful upon the questions. Though Rin's eyes held some sort of conflict that unsettled her slightly, the woman herself didn't seem all that bad. Hopefully the first impressions would prove to be true and Hajime's sense of others' personalities would not fail her.

"Do you like living here with your father?" Her blue eyes finally met Hajime's chocolate brown, allowing her to see the relief, happiness and purity swimming within them. The sight both relaxed and unsettled her.

"Uh-huh, Daddy's really nice and reads me books a lot!" She rocked back and forth, the soles of her feet meeting and her hands on her ankles (also called the butterfly position, for whatever reason,) with her hair swishing back and forth.

This intrigued Rin. "What kind of books?"

"Three Samurai Cats, the Boy of the Three Year Nap, and sometimes he'll read me things from the sketchbook!" The sketchbook the girl mentioned did not ring any bells in Rin's mind, so she simply assumed it was something that Shirou had given her or shared with his daughter at some point.

"And do you like them?" Another nod and hum was Hajime's response. "I also hope your father hasn't done anything to upset you?"

There was the sound of jostling and metal clanging against metal before Shirou peeked his head out from the kitchen so he could see the girls better. "Do I hear someone doubting my parenting ability?"

"Loud and clear, Shirou, loud and clear," Rin gave him a teasing smirk and he sighed in response, comically shaking his ladle at her before going back to cooking, extracting a snort from Rin and a giggle from Hajime. The little girl tilted her head in thought, before turning back to Rin.

"Nope! Daddy isn't mean at all!" The woman smiled at this, glad to hear it.

"Good, good…"

Rin glanced over Hajime's features; thin, frail, skinny and so pale she looked like she'd just walked out of the Arctic Ocean. In a way, she supposed the girl could be considered cute, but the bony quality of her fingers as she fiddled with her yukata took away from that slightly.

She had to admit, she was a bit worried for Hajime. Since, as expected, the world was rather small-minded, it was very likely for any other children she encountered to consider her someone who should be avoided. Hajime was North Korean, after all. She may have had absolutely nothing to do with the battles waged because of World War III, but that wouldn't keep ignorant children from recognizing her as Korean at all.

Hajime was going to enter school not too far from now, and she didn't want anything to happen to her. She was just a child, after all.

"Miss Rin?"

The brown haired woman blinked, feeling a slight snap in her head before meeting Hajime's eyes again.

"Are you special like Daddy?" Rin raised a brow inquisitively, not entirely sure what she meant.

"Special thing that Daddy has, that only special people like Daddy can do!"

It didn't take two more seconds for the Magus to realize what Hajime was trying to say. Magecraft – she was asking if Rin could use Magecraft. She had completely forgotten that Shirou had already told his daughter about it.

"Yes, I'm special like your father, but he's much more special than I am." Hajime smiled at this, and clapped her hands excitedly.

"Daddy's very, very special!" The woman nodded - there was no way she could deny that. While he may be a third-rate Magus, his Magecraft was still remarkable and impressive on many levels.

"Well, changing the subject a little, I have some gifts for you that I brought from England," Rin said, feeling a silence fast-approaching. It didn't have the effect she would have liked, however, which she realized when Hajime put on an expression of confusion.

"Miss Rin, what's an 'England?'"

Breakfast had passed a bit awkwardly – to Rin, at least. She had no idea what to say to the child, both because Hajime was different from most children she had encountered, and Hajime didn't speak as much Japanese as Rin did, making communication somewhat difficult. So, she simply watched carefully as Shirou and Hajime interacted, trying and failing to understand their conversation.

It wasn't because it was nonsensical (well, maybe it was, Rin wasn't sure), it was because they were speaking in Korean, and it didn't help much that she could say with such confidence that she knew not a word of the language.

When Hajime finally finished her meal (and Rin really meant finally – the girl took forever to eat, it was absurd), Shirou cleared the table, placing the various dishes in the sink to be washed at a later point, and the girl soon found herself being pulled along by her father and Rin to the female Magus' room so they could see what she had brought for them as gifts.

And not too long after that, Hajime's hands were fully occupied by various sweets, a stuffed animal, and a bag full of gemstones.

"Miss Rin, what are these?" Hajime inspected the various shining jewels, her vision somewhat limited from the dark blue dog plush blocking the way.

"They're called gems," Rin explained as patiently as she could, "But these are very special gems. I used my special powers to make the gems special like me, and they can keep you safe if you're in trouble."

"Gems?" Hajime blinked – the word didn't feel strange, in fact it rolled off her tongue quite nicely. "Gems can be special like Daddy and Miss Rin too?"

"Yes, but not as special," Shirou chipped into the conversation. "Rin can use her special powers to give the gems only some of hers." Hajime made an 'O' with her mouth and nodded eagerly, getting a basic grasp of Shirou's explanation. "They can only use Rin's special powers a few times, so those are very important, don't lost them."

Rin saw Hajime nod again, holding the jewels a bit closer to herself. Standing up, she stretched her back, which hurt from crouching down and bending it for a rather long time. "Alright, that's all for now. Do you want to do something together?"

A sound of playful disappointment came from Shirou's direction as he pouted lightly. "There's nothing for me?"

The woman simply turned and stuck her tongue out at him jokingly.

"How rude!"

The white haired man suddenly felt a nudge on his leg and looked down to see Hajime with a determined glint in her eyes. "I can make something for you Daddy!"

A feeling of warmth coated his chest as a smile formed on his lips, and he lifted her up into his arms. He said something to Hajime in Korean, and from the expression that Hajime made and the whiny reply, Rin guessed he'd told her she didn't have to.

"Of course I got something for you, idiot. I'll give it to you later though," she chuckled and rolled her eyes when Shirou sent her a triumphant smirk. Hajime, from her place in her father's arms, shouted something (once again in Korean) and he let out a small sigh, though it wasn't out of exasperation.

"Hajime says that she wants to go outside," Shirou explained. Rin quirked a brow before remembering that Hajime hadn't been beyond the borders of the Emiya household for a long while. "I would usually refuse, but I think that she should go outside now that she's got two people with her. What do you think?"

Rin gave him a bewildered look before rubbing her chin and glancing at the girl in his arms. "Sure, I don't see why not. It's about time she went outside anyways," a shrug was her simple response and Shirou looked a bit relieved at this before focusing on his daughter once more. Rin watched him tenderly pat Hajime's head and hold her a bit closer, telling her what Rin could only assume to be "Yes," but with a few more words.

The girl beamed at him, leaning her head on his chest and making a small sound of celebration before Shirou walked to the door of Rin's room. "I'll take her back to her room so she can put her things away – should we meet by the front?"

Rin nodded, and the white haired male was soon out of sight, the sound of his footsteps and Hajime's bubbly laughter fading away as well. After sitting still for a moment, she stood, turned off the lights in her room and closed the door before leaving, following after the two.

As she heard her own feet against the wood, her mind wandered back to the times when she had stayed in this small estate during the Holy Grail War, all the chaos that had happened behind her back, Archer, and…

Rin felt a small feeling of dread drop into her stomach at the thought of the Servant. The man who had been no other than the one she had fallen for, but in a completely different mindset, personality and timeline than the Shirou whose home she was travelling through that very moment. Archer had, in reality, done so much for her, for his other self (the Shirou who was currently holding Hajime), for the other Servant, Rin felt bad for all the accusations she had thrown at him. All the scolding, everything. He had had pure intentions, and she failed to see this until the War ended and he gave her only one request – one request out of all the favors that she owed him, and it was an important one, that she could not deny, but she felt as if she should have done more for him, forgiven him while she still could say it to him, embrace him and tell him that all his past efforts had brought such joy to another person.

But she couldn't do that anymore. She had no chance of being able to Summon him again, speak with him again and apologize for everything. Then again, what were the chances of him actually acknowledging her apologies? Nil, that was what first popped into her mind, but if this was the Shirou she had come to know and (admittedly still) love, he would at least listen to her words and realize the regret she had been gathering in her gut.

Stopping in her tracks, Rin paused to look out at the grass just beyond the sliding doors that were open, letting the fresh air in.

Archer deserved more than what had been given to him – betrayal, hate, death, and his motivations made sense. But if it weren't for Shirou's Servant, Rin probably would never have realized any of this. It was thanks to her that Rin could be enlightened and realize this, but she was still too late in discovering it all.

A breeze blew towards her, gently pushing her hair from her face, bringing her to her senses and reminding her that she needed to meet up with Shirou by the front door. Turning back to the hallway, she resumed walking, trying her best to take her mind off of the man who had never asked much of anyone.

A/N:

You guys have no idea how much stuff I've looked up for this story. Well, maybe you do, or it isn't nearly as impressive as you might think, but still, it's more effort than I've ever put into anything before, including school projects. Which isn't saying too much, since I don't really dedicate a lot of time to my school projects or assignments unless it's a free-write paper or art homework, but still.

I looked up adoption documents and the process (which sadly didn't come in nearly as handy, or get put in nearly as much as I would have thought), average size of a child's hands, war tactics of the Roman Empire, WWI and WWII, the parts of the brain, motor control signals in the body, Japanese elementary school admissions, average ages for elementary schools and Japanese school regulations and requirements, as well as a lot of predictions people have for warfare in the 2020's. I had to suffer through re-watching all three endings of Fate/Stay Night all over again, and re-watching the anime, as well as the one for Fate/Zero, and read up on Fate/Grand Order (as well as play the English version), Fate/Apocrypha, and thoroughly scan the Wiki on all types and parts of Magecraft.

And, despite all that, I'm fairly confident I'm going to forget a large chunk of it over the course of writing this whole thing, so longer pauses than normal probably mean I had to reread some book or Wiki(pedia) page. Sorry about that.

And for some reason I thought that reading the Ace Attorney Wiki would come in handy too, probably because some of it takes place during the 2020's, but really, that isn't a good reason to do that. I really don't know why I started reading through it, but whatever.

And in addition to research I have so much planned for this story oh my god but I'm still in the really slow stage of Hajime's childhood oh boy it's going to take ages to write down everything -

I have four books in this series and then two more series that are based off of this one with four parts each, possibly less than four but we'll see when we get there. I have a whole thing of over 7000 words vaguely describing the plots of each book and oh boy I still have a lot to add I don't know what to do with myself.

And adding onto those two series, there's another two on top of that with the plots all fully written out and there's more under construction.

What am I doing with my life, I question myself.

Also, I still have so much to do in the mysterious world that isn't the internet; I got moved up a level for my French courses, and I have no idea how to handle this whole situation :"

All the people in that class are a grade higher so uh oh there goes my life I hope no one kills me.

Oh, also as some of you may have noticed I published another story called Whatever You May Be. I'm not encouraging you to read it as much as I'm telling you it is related to this story, as unlikely as that may seem. So yeah, feel free to follow that too if you want to get a peep and possibly a whole look into some of this really complicated mess of plots that I've come up with.

Fair warning, though, if it gets far enough into it, it holds spoilers to the ending of PM.