Summary So Far
Craig and Tweek's relationship is progressing ever since Craig admitted his evolving feelings. Unexpectedly, Kyle also confessed to Tweek soon after. Stan, who is conflicted about the situation, decides to help his best friend…
Chapter 6: In Sickness and In Health II
Stan didn't know why he was overly nervous to initialise a conversation with the messy blond-haired boy. He just felt a weird ache in his stomach area as he watched Tweek struggle to put his stuff back in his locker. It must be because his intentions weren't exactly pure, trying to trick the blond kid into meeting with Kyle, which he didn't feel exactly right about doing so. That must have been it. "Hey Tweek," Stan called out as casually as possible as he walked over.
"Eek!" The twitching boy jumped on the spot before turning around quickly to face the other boy. "Why does everyone like to sneak up on me at my locker!?"
Stan was close enough now that the aroma of ground coffee beans hit his senses. "Dude you smell…!" really good, Stan bit back from adding, covering his nose with his hands in shock.
"Ehh!? Hey! Just because…"
"Urgh, I think I'm going to be sick." The raven-haired boy took a step backwards away from the source of the discomfort. That unusual pain in Stan's tummy region intensified. He didn't know what was happening all of a sudden, but the feeling was strangely familiar.
"Gah! This-this is about Kyle isn't it!?" Tweek looked really pissed. "Listen, I didn't want to say this – "
Stan stared at the overly animated boy in wonder; somehow, his appearance must have changed since last week, as he had a faint glow surrounding him. Tweek's large blue-green eyes glared back. Every so often the boy momentarily grimaces, closing one of his eyes tightly shut; it was inarguably very cute. Oh god, Kyle's nonsense talk must have gotten to me, Stan thought. But then again, the familiarity of this feeling was bubbling to the surface. Like a word he knew existed, but just eluded his grasp.
"– possessed by a ghost! Ahh! That is way too much – "
Wendy. It was similar to how he used to feel about Wendy, Stan realised in a sudden epiphany. He continued to watch with half-lidded eyes, enchanted by the boy with radiant blond locks. Tweek was still talking animatedly, his arms waving around in exaggeration, completely clueless to the other boy's sudden paradigm shift. Stan wondered how it was even possible he missed what was so transparently obvious now?
"– then maybe he'll want my blood too! Eek! So scary – "
It must have been because Tweek was nothing like Wendy, who is, as PC Principal would say, a strong, independent woman. The trembling blond was more like an endangered animal, a rare species that must be protected. Stan felt more conflicted now than ever; in his mind different competing interests were duking it out for supremacy.
"– all the reasons why Kyle should leave me alone!" Tweek finally stopped his rant, taking in deep breaths.
"… what?" Stan blinked at Tweek, a blank look painted on his face.
"Jesus Christ! I swear you are like Craig sometimes!" Tweek crossed his arms, but his facial expression relaxed a bit. "He warned me about you guys! Gah! So I'm going to stay away from now on! I-I remember we stopped being friends all of a sudden before, so this isn't anything new."
"Come on dude, we are still friends." Stan stated with confidence. "What about that one time, when you helped us look for Kyle's little brother?"
"Nngh! There is no way I would go into a scary forest all alone! I was just following Craig..."
"No way, dude." Stan interrupted. "No offence, but that guy is kind of a dick."
"Believe it or not, Craig is actually a really caring person!" The blond boy tensed up, he hated this common misconception of his stoic partner. "He just doesn't like to show off!"
"You're right man. I'm sorry, we shouldn't have just abandoned you as a friend." Stan lifted his hands up in a show of surrender. "You have every right to be mad."
Tweek paused as he noticed the other boy didn't actually apologise for insulting Craig, before sighing in resignation. "I'm not mad about that, if that didn't happen I wouldn't have started hanging out with Craig," he admitted candidly. "…and-and Token and Clyde, of course!"
Stan frowned, he didn't like how Craig seemed to be always on Tweek's mind. "Hey, why don't you hang out with me during lunch, just like old times?" Stan asked hopefully.
At this unexpected proposition, Tweek glanced at the taller boy properly for the first time in a while. Stan's brown jacket didn't hide the fact that he was clearly one of the most athletic boys in their year level. The black locks of hair poking out from underneath his blue and red hat reminded Tweek of his partner. He briefly wondered if it was just as soft to the touch. "I told you before…" Tweek sighed again in frustration. "Wouldn't Kyle be there?"
"I won't let him touch you." Stan replied immediately. "Also, I think it might be best if you told him directly what you just told me, you know let him down gently. Otherwise, he probably won't stop."
"You-you think so? We-well, you do know him best." Tweek paused for a moment to think about it before shaking his head rapidly. "No man, like actually reject somebody? That is way too much pressure! I-I can't…"
"No dude, you can." Stan wanted to move closer, but decided against it for now. "You can do more than you think."
The blond boy returned a confused look at that statement; there are quite a few similarities between Craig and Stan. "Oh ok fine," Tweek finally said. The other boy smiled widely in response, showing his perfect set of white teeth. At this display, Tweek turned away to hide his reddening face. Then again, there is no way Craig would show his emotions so freely. "… uh, so-so anyway, Stan. Do I actually smell?"
"Nah man, that was just me being an ass." Stan laughed, before continuing in a very grim tone. "Though you should seriously stay at least 3 feet away from me at all times."
"Hey! You asshole!" Tweek held a fake frown for a second before bursting out laughing.
Tweek followed Stan to his group's lunch table. The boy twitched in surprise to see Cartman sitting with Kyle, like nothing had happened between them last week; it was as if this was just another episode on a non-serialised cartoon show. Albeit Kenny, a boy whose face was constantly hidden by a bright orange parka, sat between the two. He must be the glue which kept the odd group of people from fracturing apart.
Kyle stopped talking once he noticed the pair approaching and lifted his hand in a wave, quickly flashing a smile of gratitude to the taller one. Stan returned a sheepish grin, scratching the back of his head. Oh god, I should have known it was a trap, Tweek thought franticly, suddenly freezing. He trembled on the spot, his mind repeating in a loop that he should have just listened to Craig in the first place and not have been charmed by Stan.
A hand waved in front of Tweek's face. "Dude are you ok?" Stan asked with a gentle smile. "I said you can sit where ever you feel comfortable." He looked expectantly at the shaking blond boy. Tweek felt it was now far too late to run away, so he took a seat on the furthest corner away from Kyle. Stan carefully took a seat on the same side as Tweek, a foot away in distance.
"… I can't believe you like this weirdo." Eric stated between mouthfuls of food.
Slowly without anyone but Tweek noticing, Stan shifted on the bench closer and closer until the side of his leggently knocked the blond boy's own leg. The raven-haired boy audibly sighed in relief, before smiling brilliantly at the smaller boy. Tweek turned away as his look of confusion was replaced by a blush.
"Shut up, fatass! I thought Stan talked to you!" Kyle shouted quickly, looking around to see if there were any eavesdroppers. "He told me you promised not to talk about that!"
"And you believed me." Eric snorted. "Besides, it's not like anyone in this town cares anymore. We're PC now bruh." He pointed to the 'Token's Life Matters' black and white shirt he was wearing.
Kyle sighed in frustration, biting back the retorts he had planned, before turning towards the boy on the opposite corner of the bench. "Tweek, I'm so sorry man, I shouldn't have hurt you like that."
"It-it's ok," Tweek mumbled meekly, his previous boldness dulled due to nervousness. He wasn't sure if the source of his anxiety was due to Kyle being here or because of how weird Stan was acting. "Just don't – "
"Well, I was wrong about Craig's feelings," Kyle continued unabated. "However, I still think I'm right – "
"Dude, Tweek was trying to say something," Stan interrupted, frowning. "You should try listening for once." He briefly rested his hand on Tweek's thigh underneath the table in a gesture of support, but that only made the blond boy tense up even more instead. "Go ahead Tweek."
"Wha?" Kyle replied, looking with a mixture of surprise and confusion at his supposed best friend. "What is your problem man? I'm just trying to explain myself, I thought that you – "
"Do you ever shut up and think about what Tweek wants?" All heads turned back towards Stan, as if in a tennis match. He was pinching the bridge of his nose and shutting his eyes tightly in frustration. "You are seriously acting like Cartman right now." The real Cartman cracked up laughing in the background.
Kyle slammed one of his clenched fists down onto the table, making Tweek jump in his seat. "I'm nothing like that fatass, god-damn it!" The redhead frowned at Stan, as if trying to figure out a hard puzzle. "Dude, what the hell is wrong with you?"
"I just woke up and realised that green doesn't even look good on you! Not to mention your hat is stupid!"
"Ok ouch," replied Kyle, finally noticing how close his friend was sitting next to the object of his affection. In a flash of insight, Kyle's posture became rigid. He suddenly realised what the root of Stan's problem was; they were super best friends for a reason. "Oh my god… Stan stop whatever you are thinking right now."
"What?" Stan froze, hoping his best friend didn't just read his mind right now. "Wha-what are you talking about Kyle?"
"You are just probably really confused at the moment, possibly because of me." Kyle explained calmly.
Stan felt the heat rise to the surface of his face in embarrassment at how transparent he was to Kyle. Still, he shook his head in defiance. "No Kyle, I don't think I've ever been more certain."
"Stan, just stop! You always had the tendency to go with the crowd even when it doesn't apply to you! Remember that metrosexual phase, or when you used the transgender bathroom!?" Kyle stood up. "This doesn't apply to you either, so stop it!"
"You-you can't just tell me to stop feeling!" Stan shouted back. Tweek exchanged a puzzled look with Kenny, mystified at this half conversation.
Kyle stared at his friend with a mixture of disbelief and annoyance. He realised that he wouldn't be able to persuade Stan at this moment, so he needed to act right now. The fiery haired boy walked around their table and grabbed the jittery boy's arm. "Tweek, we are leaving. It's dangerous to remain here."
"Da-dangerous!?" Tweek repeated in a high pitch voice, looking around with wide eyes for this unseen threat. He was suddenly yanked off his seat.
"Don't even fucking touch him!" Stan roared, getting up immediately and grabbing the skittish boy's other arm. "He's least safe with you!"
"You are not gay!" Kyle finally responded, emphasising each word. The cafeteria had long gone quiet. Tweek faced the person in question in surprise. Stan immediately looked down to the side as his entire face burned red in embarrassment, his grip loosening.
Cartman suddenly started laughing, almost manically. "This-this is the best thing ever you guys!" he interjected between deep breathes. Kenny's blond brows were scrunched together, his voice muffled as he mumbled something indecipherable.
The other blond boy's facial expression eased a bit, as he looked at the dwindling figure in sympathy. "It-it'll be ok Stan – " Tweek began.
"What the hell are you two doing to my boyfriend?"