this is horirble
"So what are you going to do for your anniversary?" Kaito asked, and Gakupo froze, food halfway to his mouth.
"Ididntreallyhaveanythingplanned"he muttered, bowing his head down in shame. Kaito sighed.
"Well Luka will probably murder you if you don't do anything." Kaito told him and Gakupo sighed. Luka wasn't overly clingy or anything, and she didn't expect fancy dates, but she did expect things on big events like Valentines day or her birthday. Their one year anniversary was coming up and Gakupo had no clue what to do for her.
Over the next few days, he pondered it every time he had a minute free, and didn't come up with an idea until one night in the shower.
"I GOT IT!" He cried, bounding out of the shower. Dripping wet, (and naked) he ran to his phone and called Kaito
"KAITO!" He screamed into the phone.
"What?"
"MEET ME IN FIFTEEN MINUTES AT MY HOUSE!"
"Sure dude, what-" Gakupo cut Kaito off by hanging up. He then started to write the details of his plan on paper, when 15 minutes later, the doorbell rang. Rushing to the door, Gakupo flung it open to see Kaito.
"OH GOD- DUDE! MAN PUT SOME PANTS ON I DON'T-I DON'T WANNA SEE YOUR FUCKING JUNK! COVER IT UP!" Kaito cried and Gakupo looked down and suddenly remembered that he was naked. He slammed the door in Kaito's face and promptly put on his usual man-dress-robe-thing and opened the door again. Kaito sighed and walked in.
"So why am I here?" He asked once he was inside and Gakupo jumped up and down in excitement.
"I FINALLY FIGURED OUT WHAT TO DO FOR LUKA AND I'S ANNIVERSARY!" He screamed, purple hair flopping everywhere.
"That's great man, but before we begin I have one question. Why the hell would you dye your pubes purple?"
"SO THEY MATCH!" Gakupo screamed and stalked away. Kaito just shook his head and followed.
That friday night, Gakupo adjusted his purple eggplant mankini and prepared to go up on stage.
"Do you think this will work?" He asked Kaito and he nodded. Gakupo peeked through the curtain separating him from the crowd. He saw Luka in the front row and he quickly closed the curtain.
"That was Rin singing Meltdown. Up next is Gakupo Kagumi singing My Heart Will Go On, dedicated to Luka Megurine."
The curtain opened and Gakupo strutted on stage. His junk jiggled as he walked and Luka facepalmed. Some strands of purple pubic hair were visible and Luka facepalmed even harder.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEVVVRRRRRYYY NIIIIIGGGGGHHHHHT IN MAH DREAMS" he began and Luka blushed beet red.
The song went rather well, and his mankini only fell off twice!
"That was Gakupo Kagumi singing 'My Heart Will Go On,'" Kaito announced as Gakupo left the stage. "Up next is Magnet.." the rest of Kaito's words Gakupo never heard because he tripped down some random stairs.
"What. The hell. Was that?" Luka asked once Gakupo was awake from his stair incident. He stood up and brushed himself off.
"I wanted to seduce you!" He whispered, voice lowering. "Did it work?"
"No." Luka stated, and Gakupo screamed and fell on the floor. He started to twitch and Luka stared at him.
"Didn't work- failure-hdosps-sex" he sputtered, twitching more. Eventually he passed out, and Luka, being the biotch she is stole his eggplant mankini and went home.
By some act of nature only possible in a fanfiction, Gakupo woke up on monday, backstage, naked. Of course, he didn't realize and went out into the halls to get his stuff for his classes.
He ended up causing nine girls to faint, fourteen dudes to stare enviously at his junk, and being slapped by Miku. Oh, and his pubes got caught in his locker. Eventually he made it to first hour though, and took his seat at the back of the class.
A few minutes later, Mr. Richards walked in. He started teaching math like usual until he called Gakupo to answer a question on the blackboard. Of course Gakupo strutted up to the front of the class, junk flapping everywhere.
Mr. Richards fainted.
When Mr. Richards awoke, he was on the ground staring at Gakupo's junk above him. And his purple pubes.
Mr. Richards passed out again. When he woke up he went crazy and became obsessed with people's junk.
After Mr. Richards passed out for the second time Gakupo jumped out the window. It being two stories up everyone thought he would break a leg. Instead he landed in the panda fountain. He was then soaking wet and naked. He jumped out of the fountain and ran down the street screaming about nipples.
Luka then showed up and made out with him on the floor of a Chinese restaurant. They made out until the owner kicked them out.
~~THE END~~
Epilogue
Gakupo took over the world using only his junk and two gallons of purple hair dye. He eventually married Luka and they had no kids cause they would die from a combination of bad cooking and purple pubes.
Mr. Richards was never the same. He eventually made a fanclub for Gakupo's junk made of 23 boys and girls. And Miku, who was never the same after that.
Miku married Kaito and had 7 leek children. They ruled what was once Germany but is now Leekonia.