Interlude - Exhaustion

Every day, we lose a little more. The army dwindles as Macedon gorges itself on Aurelis, stealing our morale and land bit by bit. We're running out of soldiers, sanctuaries, and time. Medy has ordered Macedon to commit its full force on wiping us out. According to the rumors, Medy intends on 'making examples' of both Nyna and Duke Hardin. I think he's really pissed off that some simple humans have held on so long.

But it wouldn't last. We were all feeling the strain and, every day, we lost a bit more.

"Damn, that's a bad neck hit," I whispered as I passed Nyna some medicine. Today's battle had been particularly bad, and even Duke Hardin was barely able to survive. "Did they try to slit your throat or something?"

"No, they tried to take my head, I think," Duke Hardin answered. He held himself perfectly still as Nyna bandaged him; he'd refused healing staves once it became clear his injuries were bad, but not fatal. We were running low. "I was just inconsiderate and dodged, so it caught the side of my neck instead."

"Poor way to take a head." I wound some bandages around his head, where he'd taken a bad injury. "Should I try to fix this up like your turban?"

"No, but thank you for the thought." He managed a smile, and I laughed a little. "The other wounded…"

"Are either bandaged, dead, or shipped out of here." Rapid footsteps caught my ear, and I looked up to see both Wolf and Sedgar swing into the room. "They're here."

"Yes, they are," Wolf confirmed. He sounded even more tired than he looked, which said a great deal since he seemed to sway as he tried to stand. "They'll be through our barricades before long."

I sighed, completely unsurprised. The fortress had been surrounded yesterday afternoon, and we'd been under siege ever since with barely any soldiers capable of fighting. We were relying on tricks such as burning oil and the like. But there was only so much food, especially since the Macedonians were torching the fields as they passed, and so much supplies. We were low on everything.

Wolf continued to report, but Sedgar remained silent. Instead, he looked right at me, with a question in his eyes that he wished he didn't have to ask. I knew it, though, as I'd already been thinking it. Out of all the fighters in the castle now, I was the only one not completely spent. Since I had stayed to guard Nyna as I always did, I bore no injuries and had most of my stamina. Still, I found myself hesitating. The last time I left Nyna's safety to someone else, she had been captured.

But the sound of a battering ram slamming against wood, and the sound of wood splintering decided me. If there was going to be any chance of Nyna and Duke Hardin making it out of here alive, I had to do this. So, I looked right at Sedgar and nodded. He gave me a sad, sad smile in response; we both knew what this decision would mean for me.

"Nyna, come here," I whispered when Wolf took a moment to breathe. She looked up at me curiously, but finished tying off Duke Hardin's bandage and came to my side. I gave her a look over and sighed a little. "Well, this might be a bit uncomfortable. You've got bigger boobs than me."

"W-what?!" Nyna instantly yelped. Her face went a bit red and, hilariously, so did Duke Hardin's. Wolf looked scandalized, while Sedgar just laughed. "W-why make that sort of…? And with men around and…"

"Mercenary. I have no sense of modesty." I started unbuckling my armor. She was already wearing some of my clothes, since her last good dress had been soaked in too much blood, so… "You want to keep your hair long?"

"I… yes?" She squeaked as I started buckling my armor on her. "Wait, hold on! What's going on?"

"Hair long means we'll have to be creative…" I snatched some of the leftover bandages and twisted her hair up in a bun. Thankfully, her hair was very fine, so it wasn't hard to keep it in place as I used the bandages as a makeshift ribbon. "The armor is going to be uncomfortable, and I'm sorry, but keep it on until you're safe."

"Are you trying to pull a bait thing like what we heard the Prince of Altea used to escape?" Wolf demanded. All trace of embarrassment had fled while I'd worked. "You can't pretend to be her. You don't look alike at all!"

"The point isn't for me to look like her!" I snapped, glaring at Wolf. "The point is for her to not look like a princess! In my clothes and armor, she'll look more like a mercenary. That'll make it easier for her to escape!"

"And what of you?" He waited, but I decided to not answer. "The gates are falling, and there's going to be fighting. Without armor, you'll basically condemn yourself to-"

"There, done." I checked all the buckles for good measure and gave Nyna a quick, tight hug. She was frozen stiff, confused by everything. "Okay. Wolf, Sedgar. Take Nyna and Duke Hardin and run. I'm sure there's still some secret exits they haven't blocked yet."

"...You're going to be the last shield," Duke Hardin whispered. His eyes were dark and pained as he tried to stand. "Diana, hold on a moment. If anyone should be the last shield, it should…" He flinched, though, and started to buckle, though Sedgar caught him before he fell completely.

"It should be the bodyguard," I replied firmly. I was scared. I wasn't sure why. I'd fought impossible battles before. But I was. I was scared. But I wouldn't let it show. "It should be the mercenary."

"Without your armor, you don't even have a chance of surviving."

I already knew that. "But if I don't, you and Nyna don't make it. There's no one else who can fight." I smiled, and nudged the still frozen Nyna over to Wolf. "So, go. Quickly."

"Diana, wait!" Duke Hardin tried to say more, but Sedgar bustled him out the door and down the hall. "Hold on! Sedgar, listen to me!"

"That's that." I gave Nyna my bravest, warmest smile. "I'm off~!"

"You… wait…" Nyna finally began, slowly unfreezing. Wolf, however, snagged her arm and dragged her down the hall after Sedgar and Duke Hardin, with a stony expression. "Wait, hold on!" Nyna tried to reach for me, but Wolf already had her out of reach. "Diana! Diana, wait! Don't go! Don't leave me!"

"Wolf, if even one hair on her head is harmed, I'll take it out on you," I called. I tried not to wince as I saw Nyna already bawling. "Duke Hardin, Sedgar, that goes for you as well! You hear me?" There was no response, of course, and I didn't have the time to wait. The sounds of the gates falling echoed just two heartbeats later, and I turned away to head towards them.

"Diana! Diana!" Nyna's sobbing screams followed me as I walked slowly to what was would be my last battle. Each one made me wince, and I briefly closed my eyes and mouthed an apology to her. Like Camus, I was staying. I was staying, so that she could escape.

I figured she'd never forgive me. I wouldn't blame her if she didn't, at least.

I stepped out into the main hall, where the Macedonians were swarming like rats after feed. Being unarmored, and all the noise, I had a distinct advantage in that they just didn't notice me, or the sword I held, especially as since I lingered on the edges. I knew what to do, even if I had never done this before. This was actually how Dad died, holding the final line of defense while Charles and I had escorted our employer out of their burning manor. That employer had been very nice, and had paid us triple.

But I remembered what he'd done, to make them all pay attention. And I had easy access, because no one paid attention to the small, frail looking girl sneaking around to their leader, snapping out orders. Of course, they paid attention after I decapitated the general. I had to jump up to hit, but I managed it. That's when they all frenzied and made to attack.

A mage struck me first, and their fire spell hit me hard, even knocking me back a bit. I closed my eyes and focused on dispelling the arcane energy to reduce the damage, and I jumped into the fray, making sure to cut down the mages first. Mages were invaluable for destroying fortresses.

And I fought. Most of them turned on me, though a few went down the halls, so I had a large pick of enemies, while they were all slamming against each other, wild swings cutting more of their own than me. Not that I didn't take injuries. Before long, every bit of me was aching and I had injures all over me, especially my neck, chest, and back. The lack of armor did give me a little more speed than normal, but I was way more exposed. However, I used the corpses of those I killed as shields and walls, making them stumble and buying me the extra few breaths I needed to catch them off guard and add another to the pile.

This was about the time I remembered that Dad hadn't had this many people after him. So, at some point, I turned and darted down a hallway, forcing them to come at me in smaller numbers. That helped me a bit more, since they were just angry and not quite thinking, especially with their general down. However, at some point during that fighting, something slammed into my chest and all the air left me in a gasp. I stumbled back, feeling as if time had slowed, and I slowly brought my hand up to feel for whatever had hit me. My fingers found a smooth, warm arrow, with soft white feathers as fletching.

That was when the pain hit, and I nearly collapsed as I realized what just happened. I'd been shot. I'd been shot in the chest. Just as Charles had been, the day Archanea fell.

It hurt. It hurt so much. I could barely think because of the pain. But… I knew I had to keep thinking. I had to keep fighting. Fighting was the only way I could keep Nyna safe. Fighting was the only thing I was good at. Fighting was what I knew. Even if I was broken and battered, crawling through the mud… I had to keep fighting!

I gripped the arrow tightly and ripped it out. Fresh pain washed through me, but battle fever dulled it. My pulse hammered in my ears, each beat counting out the last moments of my life. Some part of me was screaming because basic first aid demanded that you never ripped out the arrow, but I was already dead. I was a dead woman fighting, and I'd sacrifice a few beats to scare the living hell out of those nearest me.

I fell on them, swinging as hard as I could. It wasn't much, of course. I had never been the strongest, and now, my body was actively fighting off death as well as the enemies surrounding me. But I fought them, as much as I could, as viciously as I could. I threw blood in their faces, bit them as they tried to grab me. I bashed their eyes with the pommel of my sword and kicked them in the groin. I threw their fallen shields and armor as distractions. I refused to just lay down and die. I refused to just let death take me away. I would fight until my last drop of blood.

Something thudded into my shoulder, and then my arm, forcing me to drop my sword. Distantly, I realized that there was a whole squad of archers aimed right at me. All of them were ready to take me out, and with those numbers, I knew it wouldn't be long at all. I grabbed the fighters closest to me, and shoved them in front of me, forcing the archers to shoot their own allies down. I stole a sword from a corpse and wielded it in my off hand to cut down two more. Another arrow caught my leg, and I collapsed to my knees, black lines threading my vision as my body began giving up, finally.

I used the last of my strength to grin viciously at them and the last of my breath to laugh at them as they approached, ready to stab me. I wouldn't just fall. I wouldn't let them know how scared I actually was. I'd laugh at their faces, spit in their eyes as they came closer. My spirit was my own, and there was nothing they could do to break it now. But even as I acted defiant, my mind whirled. I was terrified. I wanted someone to come help me, save me. I had so many… so many things I need to do and I…

I thought of Nyna, bawling as she was dragged away. I thought of Sedgar's sad smile. I thought of Wolf's startled, almost lost look. I thought of Duke Hardin's quiet pain. I thought of Camus, stuck in some dungeons in gods' knew where. I thought of the Grustian Royal twins, Yubello and Yumina, stuck somewhere and no one available to look for them.

I thought of the promises I made and broke, and I spared one thought, one final thought, to the gods. I prayed to them, even, and begged them to keep everyone safe, and I could only hope that this prayer, at least, would be heard.

Then I had one more thought about wondering why I heard hooves, but by that point, I was too far gone to even try to figure it out, and I fell.

Something soft was wrapped around me. I knew that much. Soft and warm, but not like what the priests claimed would happen to 'good little boys and girls' after they died. For one thing, I was in pain, and the priests claimed that heaven was a freedom from pain. Now, hell, which is where I expected to go when I died, was supposed to be very painful and the like, but it was also supposed to… well, not soft. So, I came to the conclusion that, despite what all logic dictated, I was somehow alive.

With a quiet whimper, I pried my eyes open, and blinked as light stabbed my eyes. I tried to look around, but everything was just so… blurred. For a second, I wondered if there was something wrong with my vision, but then I realized that my eyes were just watering. A couple blinks cleared them, and I could focus on small things. I was in a bed, for starters. The ceiling was white. There was an open window nearby, with pale blue curtains fluttering in a warm breeze.

Having seen everything I could without turning my head, I slowly looked to my left, swearing that I could hear my bones creak even with that little movement. To my utter shock, though, I saw Nyna. It looked as if she'd been kneeling by the bed before she fell asleep, half-sprawled on the sheets, holding onto my bandaged hand. I flexed my hand a bit, both to convince myself that I could move it, and to see if I could wake her up. She didn't even stir, so I tried to push myself up. And instantly regretted it as pain slammed into me, making my eyes water again as I struggled to breath.

"You're awake." A gentle hand fell on my shoulder, and I slowly turned my head to the right to see Duke Hardin sitting in a chair nearby. "Thank the gods," he whispered, smiling warmly. He looked exhausted, though, and the stiff way he moved told me he was in pain too. "The healers said that you would recover, but it is a relief to actually see you wake."

"What the hell happened?" I croaked. My throat was dry, and I coughed a little. And regretted it because pain. "Ugh…"

"You're going to be in a lot of pain for some time." He sat back in his chair slowly, and made to cross his arms. He winced, though, and rested his hands in his lap instead. "We had to cut your hair by the way. It was too matted."

"That's not answering my question, you know."

"Forgive me delaying. It wasn't exactly fun-fun happy times." Some exasperation bled into his voice and he sighed. "You were near death. Princess Nyna was hysterical. The healers still don't quite know how they managed to save you. There was something about a fire spell doing less damage than expected?"

The second sentence had nothing to do with the first, but I'd go with it. "I have a higher resistance than many melee fighters." I hesitated before adding, "when I was little, I actually trained as a magic user. A… a cleric, if you can believe it."

"...A cleric." He looked so disconcerted by the thought that I snickered, though that soon stopped because even that little bit hurt. "Forgive me, but that's hard to picture."

"Well, I was a sweet little girl back then. I cried over flowers, and kittens. My brothers and sisters teased me relentlessly…" I trailed off when I realized I was babbling. "Am I drugged up?" I could handle magic well, but when it came to medical drugs, I always was loopy.

"A little. You fought the healers. Nearly punched one in the face."

"I don't remember that."

"I doubt you would." He shook his head. "Regardless, you tried to fight, so they gave you some sort of sedative. You've been out for three days."

"That long?"

"Yes." His eyes grew dark. "You… had a lot of injuries. Arrows."

"I remember the arrows." Slowly, stiffly, I lifted up the hand Nyna wasn't sleep-holding. I couldn't make it far, but it was enough for me to see it was completely covered in bandages, right down to the tips of my fingers. "How bound up am I?"

"Let's just say you're not dressed because the healers didn't want to deal with dressing and undressing you every time they changed the bandages, and yet, you could walk out in public just as you are with barely any talks of scandal."

"So, basically, all of me." I let the hand fall, too pained and shaky to keep it up even for that little bit. I tried to wiggle my toes, and noticed they felt just a little less stiff, but there was definitely a binding on my feet. It was basically all of me. "Where are we?"

"The southern palace. It's hidden in the mountains. The last time anyone used it was during the first war with Medeus." His tone gave all the implications I needed. This was very much our last refuge. "Rumors say Prince Marth actually went through the mountains. Maybe he'll make it."

"Maybe." I sighed. I wasn't so hopeful now. I doubted anyone was. "How did I make it out? It doesn't make sense to me."

"Wolf and Sedgar." He smiled slightly. "I stole a lance, told them I could get the two of us out, and sent them after you. It didn't take much persuasion."

"I hope you were at least within sight of the place, or so help me…!" I tried to push myself up again, but whimpered and fell back against the pillows as pain lanced through me. "Ugh…"

"You might want to save the threats until after you can sit up." He laughed as I glowered. That just meant that he hadn't been and Wolf and Sedgar had come back for me quickly. "You're heavily injured."

"Yeah, I gathered. Where's the whole 'how did I not bleed out' explanation again?"

"Oh, that." He shrugged. "As I said, healers. Wolf and Sedgar got you out, and met up with a few who were still running. Between that and some medicinal herbs, they managed to save you. But did you seriously have to rip out the arrow?"

"I was trying to scare them." We had that many healers? Then again, this was a final sanctuary, so maybe there were healers from other camps. I'd ask, when I wasn't quite as loopy.

"Don't do that. People care if you die." He shook his head. "Regardless, I believe it'll be a few days before you can even sit up. You might have to be fed."

"Well, that's embarrassing. I haven't had to be hand fed since…" I trailed off as I thought of the last time. It had been right after Dad and Charles had found me. Dad had been the one to do it, while Charles hovered nearby to tease me silly. Even before they'd known my name, they had treated me as family. "Ah…" My vision blurred and I realized I was crying. "Oh, damn it…"

"Diana." Duke Hardin's hand rested on my head. "Ease, there's no shame in-"

"I was scared. I was so, so scared." My voice cracked and I closed my eyes, trying not to sob even as the tears slid down my face. "Damn it. I was a mercenary. Big bad mercenary who kills without a thought. I faced death every day. I nearly killed myself during the fall of Archanea, because I know what normally happens to females who surrender."

"Diana…" Duke Hardin sound like he wanted to say more, but he stopped himself.

But I kept on rambling. "But when they were aiming at me, when I lost consciousness, I… I was so scared… All I could about was how I didn't want to die. I didn't want that to be the last time I saw any of you. I…" My voice cracked again. "I… there's so many promises I made. Promises I wanted to keep, and I was scared of breaking them and..."

"Diana." This time, Duke Hardin's voice was firm, yet gentle. I opened my eyes in time to see him use a handkerchief to wipe the tears from my face. "It's okay. It just means you've found things worth living for." He sat back in his chair. "It takes courage to live, just as it takes courage to die. You found something that you're willing to do both for. That's very rare."

"But…" I wanted to explain. I wanted to explain how I'd never been afraid to die before. As a child, you didn't think about it, and as a mercenary, it just didn't matter. But now it was. Now it did. Because I'd leave Nyna and Camus behind to whatever whims life decided. Because I wouldn't be able to keep my promises to them, or to Charles. It wasn't supposed to be scary, but now it was. I didn't like that. I liked being able to fight like death didn't matter. I liked living, sure, but dying wasn't… it hadn't been…

But I couldn't word it. It was too jumbled in my head, and I felt like a fog was entering my head as I tried to explain anyway.

"Go ahead and head back to sleep, Diana," Duke Hardin whispered. I heard him shift, and felt the blanket move. He was tucking me in. "Things will seem better when you're not in so much pain."

I highly doubted that, but I didn't have the energy to tell him that before I fell unconscious. I was just… too exhausted to do much of anything. All of us were.

Author's Notes: I figured it was time to show Diana not being invincible. Actually, it was probably past time. In a sense.

Next Chapter - Champions of Aurelis (for pacing purposes, we're skipping/merging Chapter 4 with Chapter 5 of Shadow Dragon)