"Why are we here?" Heinz asked. "Did you not listen to my entire evil backstory? Most of it was about him!" he complained, pointing to the door embossed with Mayor Roger Doofenshmirtz.

"Of course I listened," Mabel said. Turning to face Heinz, her expression turned serious. "Just trust me on this, okay?"

Looking at Perry, Heinz grumbled under his breath for a moment before crossing his arms. "Fine," he said, slouching more than normal. He had no idea why he was trusting this strange, glittery secret agent but after telling her his entire backstory he figured she was sort of entitled to a little bit of trust.

"Thank you," Mabel nodded, knocking on the door.

A very little bit of trust, Heinz amended as Roger opened the door with his trademark smile firmly in place.

"Hello, Heinz," Roger greeted. "What brings you here today?"

"Well, to be honest, I have no idea."

Mabel answered, holding out her hand. "Hi, I'm Mabel. I met Heinz today and I think there're some broken teacups here that need to be fixed."

"I beg your pardon?" Roger asked, looking at her over the top of his tinted glasses.

Heinz sighed, turning around. "Okay, time to go," he said to no one in particular, turning to walk back out of City Hall. A hand grabbed his collar, stopping him in his tracks.

"Nope," Mabel said, turning him around with practically no effort. "Too late to back out now."

Somehow Heinz found himself sitting in the mayor's office, staring at his brother. Taking the chair next to him, Mabel pulled another ball of yarn out of her purse.

"So, what brings you to City Hall?" Roger asked again.

Heinz shrugged again and Mabel looked up. "I brought him here."

"That doesn't explain why you're sitting in my office," Roger said, his words starting to lose their charming edge. "Heinz, is this another one of your half-baked plans?"

"Not anymore," Mabel said, cutting off Heinz's flustered reply. "And to answer your question Mr. Mayor, we're here to discuss some family history."

Heinz sighed loudly, and Roger's tone sounded like he was trying to avoid doing the same. "I'm afraid I have absolutely no interest in something like that, Miss Pines."

The sound of Mabel's knitting needles increased and she answered coolly, "I don't think I gave you a choice."

Heinz glared at her but she didn't look at him or Roger, instead staring into space. "Mr. Doofenshmirtz, I've seen this type of thing before and it took the end of the world to resolve it to where it could be dealt with. Luckily, I don't think Danville has a world-ending snowglobe so that's not a concern." She paused for a moment to let her words sink in. "The end of the world, I mean, not your relationship with your brother. That's still a repairable problem."

Heinz snorted. "What relationship?" he asked, sitting up slightly. "He's always had everything handed to him on a silver platter and never shared. End of story." He felt the rush of anger that hadn't really cooled since he had finished his backstory start to heat up again.

"Now, Heinz, you know that isn't true," Roger said lightly. "Just because you couldn't kick a ball – "

"It was a lot more than that," Heinz accused harshly, cutting off the end of his brother's sentence. "It wasn't just the kickball and you know it."

Roger sighed heavily. "I don't think this will work, Miss Pines," he said to Mabel. "Maybe some things just aren't meant to be," he said almost regretfully.

"You're right," Mabel agreed, much to Heinz's surprise. "Some things aren't meant to be." Her tone grew harder. "However, you two," she pointed between the brothers, "are not one of those things. Now, let's try this again."

The silence was much longer this time, stretching out between the three occupants of the room like thread rolling off a spool. Heinz shifted uncomfortably in his chair, wishing for Perry the Platypus. He hadn't seen his nemesis since they had arrived at City Hall and there was a strange absence that he could feel in the middle of the deafening silence.

It was strange how, for an animal that didn't talk, Perry had crept into his life so absolutely.

Finally the silence was broken by Roger. "Listen, Heinz, I'm not sure what you want from me."

"An apology would be nice." Heinz found himself saying.

"For what?"

It was the exact wrong thing to say and Mabel tensed at the words, her needles slipping and throwing a stitch. Heinz stood up, planting both hands on his brother's desk. "Oh, like you don't know," he snapped. "What about the dresses I had to wear – "

"You want me to apologize for being born?"

" – or the way you stole Mother for yourself – "

"That was not my fault."

" – or being the best at absolutely everything!"

"For the last time, Dad decided you would be the family lawn gnome, not me!"

Heinz sat back down, crossing his arms, and silence fell again, even louder than before. Mabel's ball of yarn ran out and she started a new one. The sound of the clock hanging on the wall over the door sounded like a hammer stroke every time it ticked.

"You know I'm still your brother, right?" Roger finally spoke.

Heinz huffed, crossing his arms again. "I know," he said, an unspoken and I don't know if I want you to be attached to the end. He had never come out and said it, but it had occurred to him several times if maybe life would have been better if he and Roger had grown up in different homes.

Roger tapped his fingers on the desk for a moment before speaking again. "Things have always come easily to me, I suppose, " he said, half to himself. Heinz opened his mouth, but Mabel poked him in the arm with her knitting needle and shook her head at him. "Still, I suppose I am sorry for what happened to you while we were growing up."

What happened to you. It was a short sentence, but it felt like a brush-off, as if his brother was sweeping everything under the rug. It was exactly the type of apology he had been expecting, and Heinz wasn't sure why he asked in the first place. He was the one skeleton in the closet of his Hercules of a brother and that's how it would always be.

Heinz sighed, tapping his fingers on his arm. "Why?" he asked finally, the question clawing it way out of his mouth. It was a simple question, but it ran much deeper than the surface.

"No," Mabel said and Heinz jumped, having nearly forgotten her presence. She shook one knitting needle at Roger. "Don't say it."

"What was I going to say?" Roger asked, raising his eyebrow, his words clipped.

"You and I both know," Mabel replied calmly, "and you need to not say it."

"Fine." There was a beat of quiet and then he spoke again. "Would you believe me if I told you that I didn't know?"

"No." Heinz snapped. "How could I? You always took everything for yourself."

Roger sighed. "What could I have done differently, Heinz?" The tension stretched between them like a thread made of glass. "I was a child."

Heinz opened his mouth and shut it again. So that was the justification he was hiding behind. Another wave of anger rushed through him, and he felt three words burn through the air between them. So was I. He knew there were reasons his parents had treated him the way they had; tradition, perhaps, or more likely probably just necessity. Still, it hurt to hear Roger brush it off like it meant nothing when there was so much he could have done.

Beside him, Mabel sighed before putting her knitting down. "Listen, I think we need to get one thing straight," she said seriously. "Both of you have messed up, but some of this is the fault of neither of you. Becoming a lawn gnome," she pointed at Heinz, "not your brother's fault. Definitely a horrible thing to have happen to you, but not his fault. It's also not his fault he got elected to city office, all right? Mind-control ties aside, that isn't something you can assign singular blame for."

"I suppose," Heinz agreed grudgingly.

Mabel nodded encouragingly. "Okay, I think you can work on the rest of it now."

There was a sudden knock on the door and Heinz jumped. A new voice filtered through the door. "Mr. Doofenshmirtz, I'm leaving now. Would you like the new proposals?"

"Just a second, Melanie," Roger called, getting up and crossing his office to the door. "Thank you," he said, taking the documents she was holding.

"You are going home soon, right Mr. Doofenshmirtz?" Melanie asked.

"Of course," Roger assured her. "I'll lock up when I'm done here."

Melanie smiled thinly. "All right then. Is that a platypus?" she asked as Roger stepped back to close the door.

Roger frowned, looking behind him. "Oh, that's my brother's pet," he said after a moment, closing the door.

Heinz huffed. "He's not my pet," he said defensively, before the words sunk in fully. Looking around, he studied the corners of his brother's office. From beneath the desk, there was a chatter, and he looked down to see Perry the Platypus giving him a thumbs-up and what looked like a smile on his bill. "Oh, there you are, Perry the Platypus."

"All right then," Roger said, shuffling the papers and setting them on the corner of the desk. "He is with you though."

"Both of us," Mabel interjected. "I work with him."

"Work with him?" Roger asked, surprised. "You are aware he tries to take over the city almost every week?" he said, ignoring Heinz.

Mabel shook her head. "Not with Dr. D, with the platypus."

"You do know he's a platypus. They don't do much."

Heinz opened his mouth, but Mabel poked him again. "That's what people always say. Animals are a lot more interesting than you'd think."

"Well, all right," Roger said uncertainly.

"Like my pig, Waddles," she continued. "Now that he's all grown up, some people say he's just lazy but that's not true! He just needs to stay home more to work on his marriage, that's all!" She bundled what looked like a finished sweater into her bag and started a new colour of yarn. "I mean, it takes a lot to keep a long-distance relationship going, am I right? Anyway, I'm getting off track. Sorry. Where were we?"