EDacondas
Disclaimer: I know a lot about Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy and the first and second Anaconda movies.
Summery: They survived the waterfall but will they survive what's to come now.
Rating: T
Author's Notes: Okay this is my first EEnE crossover fanfiction in fact this is my first fanfiction so go easy on me.
Genre: Sci-fi/Action/Adventure
Chapter 5: First Strikes
Carson was still trying to get a signal from the satellite phone.
"Maybe you should call the national guard." Eddy said.
"He can't." Terren said.
"Why not?" Sarah asked.
"Because the only way for the national guard to get to us is through that!" Terren said pointing at the waterfall.
"Okay I got a signal. I'm taking it." said Carson and all the kids stared at him, "Alone!"
"Okay. Fine we'll leave you alone. Yeah come on guys." All the kids said walking away.
Carson then started dialing numbers. "Bracks." Carson said in the phone.
Elsewhere on the river a man on a boat had a phone to his ear, "Hey! Isn't it my old friend Carson Anderson? How're you doing pal?" Bracks said.
"Bracks listen I need you to meet me and a few friends 24 miles due west of your location." Carson said.
"Oh I don't know Carson I'm booked." Bracks said with a smile on his face.
"Listen you little ego maniac you better be there or else someone's wife is going to know about November, 16 in Moscow!" Carson shouted angrily as he hung up the phone.
"Wife is gone Anderson." said Bracks as he put the phone back in the case that also had a gun in it, "Long gone."
Back with the gang Ed, Edd, Eddy were having a conversation alone.
"Guys who do you think he's was calling?" Double-D asked.
"Who cares? I just hope we can get out here." Eddy said.
"Guys this is exactly like that…" Ed was interrupted by Eddy.
"Ed do us a favor and SHUT UP!!" Eddy shouted.
Then Carson hung up his phone and getting his supplies, "Okay everyone saddle up we're out of here." Carson said.
"How are we going to do that?" Jonny asked.
"Easy. I have a friend on the river." said Carson, "Listen he's going to meet us 24 miles due west of his location. It will take us 3 day if we take the normal route, but…"
"But? But what?" Kevin asked.
"It's kind of a good news and bad news scenario." said Carson, "Good news is there's a shortcut through the jungle and it will save us half the day. Bad news is it head towards a small swamp."
"A swamp." Jimmy said.
"Isn't there another shortcut or something?" Sarah asked.
"No." Carson simply said.
"Well I want to get out of here." Eddy said.
"Okay it's settled we're taking the shortcut." said Carson as he grabbed the two machetes, "Now stick together this jungle is big and you will get lost." he said as he gave the other machete to Terren as they made their way to the jungle.
"Hey. Do you think after we find your friend we can get the Orchid?" Deron asked.
"Forget it. My boat is gone I'm getting us back home." Carson answered.
"Yeah but…" Deron was interrupted.
"But nothing we head home." Carson said with a strong voice.
It's been five hours everyone was tired. They were still in the jungle trying to make it the rest of the way.
"Man you think there could have been an easier way?" Nazz asked.
"Yeah this is exhausting." Jimmy said.
"So if there was anywhere you'll go where would it be?" Eddy asked.
"Phoenix. I hear it's a nice place." Baler answered.
They kept walking and in two hours they were at the swamp.
"Maybe we should find away around." Double-D suggested.
"There is no way around. We go through." Carson said.
"Wait I saw this in 'Scary Jungle Beast of Death." said Ed, "This is the part where the man-lion waits for his unsuspecting victims to go in the swamp so he can eat them."
"Dude that movie was based in Africa. We're in South America." Carson said.
Everybody started walking through the swamp slowly. Jimmy was scared about what happened the other day. The water was so murky that you can barley see the top. But something seemed to be in the water. All of a sudden Eddy stopped right there.
"Whoa! Something just moved." said Eddy, "Something just moved down here."
"Maybe it was a piranha. Hope you're wearing thick jeans." Bobby said.
"Bobby. Knock it off." Marco said.
"I'm not joking guys." Eddy said.
"Just keep moving" Carson demanded.
Everyone kept walking but some of them were walking slowly. Nazz saw the top of the water as if it was moving towards them. Nazz then looked a little nervous and Bobby decided to use it to his advantage.
"Dun-…um. Dun-um dun-um." Bobby said.
"Stop it." Nazz said looking very annoyed.
"Dun-um dun-um." Bobby joked.
"Seriously if you don't stop it." said Nazz looking even more annoyed and kept walking. Bobby laughed a little and just then something pulled him under water. Nazz then turned around, "Oh very funny Bobby." Nazz kept walking a few feet and turned around again, "Bobby? Bobby!" Everyone turned around and then Bobby was pulled out of the water and all around the swamp screaming.
"AAAAHHHHH! HHHEEELLPP MMMEE! HHHHEEEEELLLLPPP MMMEEEE! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" Bobby shouted and then was pulled under water again. Everyone stared motionless and then Bobby came to the swamp surface all cut up. Then Bobby heard a hiss and he turned around. Out of nowhere a huge anaconda struck at Bobby and started shaking him like a rag doll.
"BOBBY NNNOOOO!" Marco shouted starting to run at the snake.
"Stop. We can't lose both of you." Carson said stopping Marco in time.
Then the anaconda went under the water with Bobby. Then everyone ran out of the swamp and into the jungle. When they were sure they were safe they stopped to sit down.
"Man what was that thing?!" Kevin asked.
"Anaconda." Carson answered.
"You have snakes out here that big?" Nazz asked.
"I can't believe it, it just came out and ate him." Double-D said.
"Guys don't worry we'll be okay." Baler said.
"Baler shut up I don't want to hear it." Marco said.
"How can you say that? Bobby was your friend, your best friend." Baler said.
"QUITE!" said Carson, "Listen anacondas are territorial. A snake that big would need a lot of space."
"What if that snake comes after us?" Sarah asked.
"Anacondas have a slow digestive system. A meal like that he'd be digesting it for weeks." Carson explained.
"How big can these things get?" Nazz asked.
"That's the biggest one I've ever saw." Carson said.
"Well let's keep going guys we're only half way there." Terren said.
Everyone started to get moving except Carson, Deron, and Marco.
"Dude this is a good reason why I need to get to the Blood Orchid." Deron said.
"Oh give it a break. One of my crew members is dead. As far as I see is this expedition is over." Carson said.
"You're going to give away a chance of a life time because of some dead stupid crew member?" Deron asked.
At that time Marco snapped, "Some dead stupid crew member?" Marco walked up to Deron and grabbed him by the collar.
"I'm going to leave you guys alone." Carson said walking off.
"Listen pal if I ever see that snake again I'm going to kill it." Marco said.
"Why? So you can dissect it and bury your friend." Deron said.
Just then Marco punched Deron in the face. Deron fell to the ground with his nose bleeding.
"Never make fun of Bobby Bern again." Marco said walking off.
Everyone kept walking for the rest of the day until they entered a valley of tall grass. Then Jimmy stopped for some reason. Sarah was the only one to notice.
"Jimmy what's wrong?" Sarah asked.
"Sarah that's the thing that tried to eat me." Jimmy said crying.
Just then Nazz stopped walking.
"Um Kevin." said Nazz.
"What?" Kevin said when he touched the back of his neck. Turn's out there was a leach on it. When he found out he started to freak. "OH MY GOD GET IT OFF OF ME!!"
"Hold still kid." Carson said when he got a lighter and burned the leach off.
"Oh thank you Carson." said Kevin.
"Shut up and lift up your shirt." demanded Carson.
"What?" Kevin asked.
"Just do it!" he said very annoyed. Then Kevin lift up his shirt and everyone looked in shock as they saw a lot of leaches on Kevin. "We're going to need a blowtorch."
"No need the son of a shepherd will remove these blood suckers." said Rolf.
"This ought to be good." Shorty whispered to Baler.
"Rolf, are you sure about this?" Kevin said a little unsure.
"Silent! Rolf must concentrate." said Rolf as he pulled off the first leech.
It's been 15 minutes and Rolf was at his fourth leech which was hurting Kevin.
"The son of a shepherd can not concentrate with you screaming like a mad cow." Rolf said still pulling off the leeches.
"I can't help it when you're yanking those leeches off of me." said Kevin.
Everyone else was waiting for Rolf to be done taking the leeches off of Kevin. Some were just sitting there waiting, others were massaging their feet. Eddy was about to put his shoe back when…
"Stop!" Terren said as he took Eddy's shoe.
"Hey! What are you doing to my shoe?" said Eddy.
Terren hit the bottom of the shoe and a spider came out, everyone quickly backed away. "If that bit you, you would be paralyzed like a statue for three days." Terren said still holding the shoe.
"Thanks." Eddy said looking at the spider.
"What do you call that?" asked Double-D.
"Stone Spider, very dangerous." answered Terren as he was about to kill the spider with Eddy's shoe. But Deron caught it in a tiny container. "What the hell are you doing Deron?
"What do you think you were about to do? Deron asked.
"The Stone Spider is not to be reckoned with, it is dangerous." Terren answered
"Yes but can you see what we can do with this?" Deron started, "With this we can finally find a cure for paralyzed people. People will pay billions for this."
Terren just looked at Deron in an untrusting way and gave back Eddy's shoe.
"Guys," Marco said as he got up. "I've got some business to take care of."
"Okay man, just don't take forever." said Shorty.
Marco walked through the tall grass until he found a clearing. He stopped to sit down and pulled out a picture of him and Bobby in it, "You bastard why did you have to die like that." He said as he remembered the day Carson asked them to work on the Bloody Mary.
(Flashback)
Marco and Bobby were at an ally in Borneo with two teenage punks. As usual Marco lit a cigarette.
"My brother asked you a simple question." said a teenage kid.
"Why are you being such a dick?" his brother said.
"Yeah, why are you being such a dick?" repeated the fist teenager.
"Because I can be." Macro answered as he gave Bobby a high five.
"You two have no idea who you're dealing with." said the first teenager.
"Let me guess." Bobby started. "Two spineless teenagers, who probably shit themselves every 2 hours." Bobby said as he gave Marco another high five.
"Okay that's it, you two are going down." the second teenager said as he got ready to fight.
"Oh please," started Marco as he put on his gloves. "I'll take you down in one punch."
"Oh yeah, bring it!" said the second teenager.
Just like what Marco said, all he did was punch that teenager across the face and he was out. The first teenager was so scared, that he ran off screaming.
"Not so hot now, are you bitch?" Marco said when he gave Bobby one more high five.
"Wow you showed him." said a voice in the corner of the ally. Marco and Bobby looked and saw a man coming out of the ally.
"Yeah, so you looking for a fight too?" Marco asked very annoyed
"No," the man started. "My name is Carson, Carson Anderson and I have a business proposition for you two."
"What kind of proposition are we talking about?" asked Marco.
"Just traveling around the Amazon Rainforest." answered Carson.
"Well then I'm in .By the way my name is Bobby, Bobby Bern." Bobby said as he shook Carson's hand.
"What about you? We could use someone with mussels for this job." Carson said.
"What the hell I'll join and the names Marco, Marco Vincent." said Marco as he shook Carson's hand.
"So lets get going so you can meet the rest of the crew." Carson said.
"You two go ahead I'll catch up." Marco said as Bobby and Carson went to the docks. Marco on the other hand walked to the teenager lying on the ground. He took his cigarette out of his mouth and put the burning side on the teenager's head. "Had no idea who you were messing with, huh kid?" he said.
(End Flashback)
When he was done moping around he got up and headed back to where the others were. When he got back Rolf was at the last leech.
"See that wasn't so bad." Rolf said as he pulled off the last leech.
"Easy for you to say." replied Kevin trying to smoothen out his back.
"Deron!" shouted Carson making Deron come over. "Listen, me and one of the kids are going up ahead to clear a path."
"Okay. But what's that got to do with me?" Deron asked.
"Well you seem so damn proud of yourself. I thought you can get everyone moving." Carson answered as he went to Double-D. "Hey you, Double-kid."
"Double-D." he replied.
"Whatever. Listen I'm going up ahead to clear a path, and I need you to come with me." said Carson.
Carson and Double-D went on ahead while Deron tried to get everyone moving. "Okay come on everyone lets go." said Deron but no one moved. "Come on up." Everyone still didn't move. Marco got annoyed with all of this so he took a stand.
"Okay everyone lets get the hell out of here." said Marco. Sure enough everyone got up and started moving.
"How'd you do that?" asked Deron.
"You have to give them a reason to move unlike you." Marco answered shoving Deron out of the way.
Back with Carson and Double-D. Carson was cutting up a path for everyone. Double-D was worried about why Carson would choose him over everyone else.
"Something wrong kid?" asked Carson.
"No of course not." Double-D answered.
"Yeah I know. I scare the living crap out of you." Carson said.
"If this is about that incident again I swear I told no one else." Double-D explained.
"No need." Carson started. "That snake you saw was the incident. The reason I told you to help me was because I need someone to talk too. Since you seem to crave for information I thought you'd be the perfect one to tell you stuff." said Carson referring that night on the Bloody Mary, when Double-D was caught ease dropping.
"So what did you want to tell me?" Double-D asked.
Carson paused a little bit. Then started tell Double-D what he needed to tell him. "Deron offered me one million dollars to stay on the path. Even when I knew it wasn't safe."
"Why would you do that?" asked Double-D, now shocked for knowing why they were stranded in the jungle.
"I don't know. Maybe it was because of the money." Carson answered.
"Yeah but you're the guide. If you knew it wasn't safe you shouldn't have taken the money." Double-D explained.
"Yeah I know that now." said Carson still cutting a path.
"I won't tell anyone if that's what you're thinking." Double-D said.
"No need." Carson started still cutting out a path. "I really don't care if you tell anyone, I have no more death threats for you. I lost too much already, my boat, a crew member, and my pride. I don't have that much left except my own dignity. So go ahead tell anyone, tell your friends, tell the rest of the crew, tell everybody see if I care!"
"Carson. I had no idea that you felt so strongly about this." said Double-D
"Yeah, well now you do. Now don't stand there, help me with this for gods sake." Carson said as he gave Double-D a knife so he can help cut the tall grass.
Back on the river Bracks was driving his boat across the river, while drinking and singing some retarded song. He kept singing until something hit his boat, causing the box with a phone and a gun to fall to the dark corner of the boat. "What the hell was that?" he said going to the edge of the boat to what he bumped into. When he looked over the edge he saw a huge long body swimming around the boat. It didn't take long for him to know that it was the body of a giant snake. "Oh my god." he said as he ran to get his box that contain the gun in it, but he couldn't find it. While he was looking for it the huge anaconda emerged from the river looking for something to eat. Unfortunate for Bracks he was the first thing the anaconda saw. So in a blink of an eye the anaconda struck at Bracks trying to pull him in the water. Bracks tried to hang on to the steering wheel but eventually let go, causing the steering wheel to roll to the left.
Elsewhere not very far away everyone else was still moving to the river. Then Jonny suddenly put Plank to his ear.
"Plank said he hired something." said Jonny.
"Dude your insane to think that piece of wood can hire or speak for that matter." Storty replied.
Suddenly an explosion was heard not that far from them.
"See I told you." said Jonny
"Come on we gotta see what's up." Carson ordered causing everyone to run to the scene. When they got there they saw a boat wrecked up on the shore.
"What the hell happened here?" Carson said looking at the boat.
Terren found a small boulder and climbed on it to look around. "BRACKS!!" he shouted but nothing happened.
Deron found a half filled beer bottle and picked it up. "Great just great, your friend got drunk and fell off the bloody boat!" he shouted slamming the bottle on the ground.
"Now what are we going to do?!" Eddy shouted.
"We're DOOM!" shouted Jimmy.
"How are we going to get out of here?" Nazz asked.
"Everybody QUIET!" Carson Shouted as everyone looked at him. "Listen it's obvious that not everything was destroyed in the wreck. I say we salvage everything we can find, and then we find another way out of here."
Everyone spread out around the boat to see if there was anything they can use. Terren found a flair gun, Rolf found two completely full gasolines cans, Double-D found some rope, Eddy found some old rags, and Kevin found four unlighted torches. Deron was going though some loose wood when he found a small box, he opened the box and found a satellite phone and a gun in it. Deron looked around to see if anyone was watching, and secretly put the small box in his bag and closed it tightly. When he was sure no one saw him he went back to the boat with everyone else. But he stepped in something and looked down and seemed shocked in what he stepped in.
Back at the boat everyone was done salvaging and went back to the shore. "This all we can find, everything else was destroyed in the wreck." Terren said to Carson.
"Okay, now all that's left is to find a way out of here." Carson said looking worried.
"Um guys I think you should look at this." Deron said as everyone went to see what he was looking at. They came to see him looking at some fish carcasses.
"Great you wanted us to see some dead fish." said Sarah.
"No look how they are dead." everyone looked at the fish, and notice that there was spear in them. "Someone had to kill these fish and probably somewhere near by."
"Headhunters." answered Carson
"Woe, Woe, Woe, Woe, Woe, Woe, did you just say headhunters?" asked Eddy.
"I'm not surprised. These lands are native to them." Carson answered.
"So what do we do?" asked Kevin.
"Their village shouldn't be far. We head there." Carson said while getting everyone moving.
"So we're going to the headhunters not away?" said Eddy.
So they started their journey to the headhunter's village not knowing what lies ahead.
End of Chapter 5
A/N: well here's chapter five sorry if it took so long. Don't forget to send some Reviews. Just to let you know that the Borneo that I'm taking about is suppose to be a town I made up.
Next time: they lose one man can they lose another, and startling secrets are revealed when they are in the village.