Slowly getting through this. I have a plan and the end is in sight for this story. It will happen! I hope you guys like this chapter. I loved writing it.
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee
Be thou my vision, O Lord of my heart,
be all else but naught to me, save that thou art;
be thou my best thought in the day and the night,
both waking and sleeping, thy presence my light.
Quinn closed her eyes, letting the song take over her body as she swayed to the music. It was Sunday morning and the girl had re-joined the church choir for a couple of weeks now. She hadn't forgotten how much she loved to sing, she'd just restricted herself to doing it where no one could see and judge her. Of course, the music was ancient and it wasn't anywhere close to as fun as Glee, but this way she could stay on top.
Be thou my wisdom, be thou my true word,
be thou ever with me, and I with thee Lord;
be thou my great Father, and I thy true son;
be thou in me dwelling, and I with thee one.
However, today, the girl couldn't concentrate on the music alone. Her green eyes kept sliding to the right, where she'd expected a certain Baritone to be. Sam was a fairly inactive member of the church choir, but since he was unable to go to Glee practices, he'd been showing up without fail. Quinn smiled unwittingly. She couldn't believe how much Sam had done for her, how much he was giving up to help her when she'd been nothing but horrible to him for weeks. Which is why she was so confused.
Be thou my breastplate, my sword for the fight;
be thou my whole armor, be thou my true might;
be thou my soul's shelter, be thou my strong tower:
O raise thou me heavenward, great Power of my power.
The girl was on autopilot now, singing the words but they weren't really touching her soul. She knew every hymn off by heart since the church insisted on recycling them all every few months. Plus, they were all the same really. Quinn furrowed her neatly shaped eyebrows, why had Sam destroyed all of her campaign posters? She hadn't even mentioned Max at their last physical therapy session, and surely the news of their break up hadn't spread that fast.. had it?
But then Quinn remembered, not everything was about her. Maybe Sam was jealous, she still hadn't forgotten that kiss and it was pretty clear that he still had feelings for her. In fact, she thought that now she'd finally rid herself of Max and the toxicity of the mask she had to wear to remain popular, she could finally give in to the fact that she returned those feelings. But maybe she could? If he had been acting out of jealousy.. well, that was kind of hot, actually. And it wasn't as if she hadn't done worse.
Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise:
be thou mine inheritance now and always;
be thou and thou only the first in my heart;
O Sovereign of heaven, my treasure thou art.
But then, why wasn't he here now? Sam coming to church choir was only really because he couldn't make it to Glee due to accompanying her to physical therapy sessions. So does that mean he'd decided to stop taking her? She was pretty harsh to him the last time they spoke, and she hadn't actually seen him since, so he was clearly avoiding her. Sam was abandoning her and going back to Glee club. She'd finally blown it for good.
High King of heaven, thou heaven's bright sun,
O grant me its joys after victory is won;
great Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
still be thou my vision, O Ruler of all.
Quinn was vacant now, barely a whisper of sound leaving her mouth. She focused on keeping herself composed throughout the rest of the song. Her heart felt crushed and she could barely breathe, but she was standing up in front of the entire church and it wouldn't do to make a scene. She was grateful when the song finally ended and she could sit, eyes downcast, listening to the rest of the service without having to participate.
"Oh Quinnie, that was beautiful" Judy Fabray gushed as she enveloped her daughter in a tight hug after the service.
"Thanks Mom," Quinn attempted a smile. Though her mother's eyes were far too busy scanning the crowd of leaving churchgoers to really notice the melancholy that was clearly written on her daughter's face.
"Look!" her mother shouted, "There are the Evans'! Shall we go over and say hi? I noticed that Sam wasn't singing today". Judy was speaking so quickly that Quinn barely had a chance to think about a reply by the time she had rushed off.
Quinn sighed heavily. She adjusted her pretty, pale yellow dress. The hemline of Quinn's dress fell far below her knee now, of course, as a church dress, it had always been chaste, but before, it sat an inch above her knee. The blonde barely gave it a second thought as she smoothed the material down her legs in an attempt to calm herself. It was really just a tactic to buy herself some time before facing the Evans'. Sam and his family were so close, ever since they became homeless, they told each other everything. Quinn had so much respect for that family, and she'd spent a lot of time babysitting for them in the past. She wasn't ready to lose them all.
Quinn nodded, steeling herself before briskly following her mother. "Hello," she smiled timidly, greeting the five blonds in front of her, "Mr and Mrs Evans, Stevie, Stacey." The girl's smile widened as she spoke to the kids.
"Quinn!" Mr Evans' boomed, "How many times have I told you, call me Dwight!"
"Sure, M- er.. Dwight" Quinn said, with little conviction. Though Dwight Evans seemed just as upbeat as usual, the rest of the family was strangely subdued. Stacey and Stevie would normally be climbing over by now, begging her to take them to the park. Quinn wondered exactly what Sam had said about her.
"Darling, why didn't you tell me about Sam?" Judy placed a gentle hand upon each of her daughter's shoulders, eyes brimming with concern.
"Wha-" Quinn frowned, before being cut off by Mrs Evans, "Yes, you've probably been so worried about him, Quinn. Don't worry, it's just a minor concussion, nothing serious at all. My poor boy just can't face the brightness of his phone screen without setting it off."
"Ouch," Quinn winced, at a loss for anything better to say. "Bad football practice?"
Five pairs of eyes looked at her quizzically. "No! Sammie had a fight!" Stevie giggled.
"Stephen Evans!" Two harsh words from his mother immediately caused the boy to change his tune.
"Fighting is bad and I should never get involved." The boy mumbled in a clearly rehearsed manner.
Quinn searched all of their faces for more information. Who had Sam gotten in a fight with? The boy was almost quarterback, sure he was in Glee, but people were pretty respecting of that these days. Other than the odd slushie, there was no violence anymore. He was also cute – really cute – and dorky, harmless. Sam didn't have any animosity with anyone. Who would even have a motive to attack him? Obviously someone else had started it, Sam would never get himself into a fight.
Quinn opened her mouth to ask how Sam was doing, but instead, found herself asking, "Can I see him?"
"Of course!" Mrs Evans smiled, "I'm sure you'd really brighten up his day. And seeing someone who isn't us will probably do him some good. We'll give you a ride."
Quinn kissed her mom goodbye, before following the Evans' to their car.
Quinn hadn't been inside the Evans' new home for a long time now, but she still remembered where everything she was. As soon as the car stopped, the blonde headed straight up to Sam's room – one that he didn't have to share with the rest of his family. Quinn bit her lip, pausing once she was outside Sam's door. She stepped sideways, checking herself in the hallway mirror. The girl had applied her make-up meticulously this morning. Only just realising that it was all for Sam's benefit.
"You know it's dark in there, right?" Quinn spun round to find two blue doe eyes staring up at her.
"Nothing wrong with trying to look nice," Quinn ruffled Stacey's hair and chuckled, realising how ridiculous she was being. What did she expect, really? She was still confused, sort of. And she was there to check on Sam, not to entice him.
"You always look nice!" Stacey grinned.
"Yeah!" Stevie piped up from behind his sister, seemingly appearing from nowhere. "Sammie always says you're the most beautiful girl he's ever seen!" Quinn couldn't help but blush and be grateful for the honesty and naivety of childhood. Her heart warmed to think that Sam still spoke of her that way.
"Stevie!" Stacey hissed, "He told us not to tell her!"
"Oh yeah," Stevie grinned sheepishly, "You didn't hear that from me." The boy said as his sister marched him off down the hallway.
"Shhh, kids!" Came a call from down the stairs. "You know your brother is ill!" Though the words were harsh, Quinn couldn't help but notice that it contained a twinkle of loving amusement.
Quinn had forgotten how much she loved the atmosphere in the Evans household. Even when they lived in that tiny motel, they'd always remained positive: using humour and drawing strength from each other to get through. It was such an environment of support and love. It had been Quinn's safe haven, when she needed to hide from being popular, and being here now felt just as relieving as it always had.
The girl moved back in front of the door, only pausing for a second before she forced herself to knock.
"Come in?" came a call from inside. Quinn twisted the handle and pushed the heavy wooden door open. "Thanks for finally respecting my privacy, Mom."
"Er-" Quinn started.
"Oh!" Sam replied clear surprise in his voice. "Quinn."
"I barely said two words," Quinn responded, surprised at how quickly Sam recognised her voice. Though, if the situation was reversed, she'd have known his too. She moved into the room, closing the door behind her, encircling them in darkness. "Oof," she muttered, involuntarily as she walked straight into Sam's desk. The room seemed pitch black to her as her eyes were still adjusting.
A dark chuckle came from somewhere in front of her. "It's not that big a room, Quinn. I'm on the bed, just follow the sound of my voice."
Quinn followed the line of his desk with her hands, grappling onto the chair and plopping herself down on it. "I'm good here." She wouldn't let herself go to Sam's bed. She was still far too confused.
"Okay" came a slightly dejected reply.
There was a long pause. "Are you okay?" Quinn finally broke the silence.
"Yeah, I guess your boyfriend told you some twisted version of what happened," Sam muttered bitterly.
"No, actually. We broke up." Quinn replied matter-of-factly. She felt so weirdly detached from the whole situation. That girl, the one who was dating – if you could even call it that – Max, wasn't really her. And she was so glad to finally be free of the whole thing.
"Really?"
"I realised I was with him for the wrong reasons. He wasn't exactly the nicest guy in school," Quinn was glad that Sam couldn't see her now. Her head drooped with embarrassment. How could she have let someone disrespect her like that for so long? For what? A plastic crown.
"I can't say I'm sorry to hear that," Sam said. "I just wanted to tell you. It was wrong of me to tear down your posters and I'm sorry. I.. I'm sorry, but I have to tell you. I thought I could handle you hating me but I'm too selfish for that and I need you" Quinn could feel her heart swelling at his words, "They- the posters, they were.. someone graffiti'd them. I didn't want you to know about it. Except now I've just ruined all of that by telling you. But you still didn't see them I guess, so that's better than-"
"Stop, Sam." Quinn said kindly. She took a moment to take it all in. Of course she knew who had really destroyed her posters: Max and his pathetic posse. So really Sam was just protecting her honor. That explanation made a lot more sense than jealousy. Even when she'd betrayed him with Finn, the boy had remained level headed. He was distant, but he hadn't acted on his pain. The boy was one to suffer in silence. After a long while, she finally said: "Thank you." She wasn't confused anymore, of course Sam was the perfect gentlemen, and she felt ashamed for even doubting him. The girl knew exactly what she wanted. She only hoped that he wanted the same.
Her eyes finally having adjusted, Quinn managed to get up and shuffle herself over to the bed without hitting into anything. She reached out, taking Sam's hand in hers. She felt comforted in the strength and warmth of his touch.
"Did you really mean it?" The girl asked vaguely.
"What?" Came Sam's reply.
"Sorry," Quinn smiled nervously, but their proximity meant that they could see each other clearly, even in the lack of light, causing Sam to squeeze her hand lightly. "The stuff you said. When you gave me that ring." She explained.
Sam tugged lightly on Quinn's arm, causing her to be pulled down on to the bed. Quinn turned, so that she was perched on the edge, rather than allowing herself to be pulled on top of the boy. "Sorry, Q. You're a lot smaller than I'd expected." Sam reached up to brush Quinn's cheek. "Of course I did, I love - loved – you and I meant every word. You were the best thing that ever happened to me Quinn. You made me feel included when I came to McKinley. I was the new kid, and you were the only one who really made an effort with me. I never wanted to let you go. Except maybe the Matthew McConaughey thing. I'm really good at that impression and I'm not sure if I can let it go for a girl"
Quinn laughed, but her heart couldn't help but sink when Sam corrected his love to loved. Of course she'd been overly hopeful in thinking that he might return her feelings. But it was too late now. She'd decided to embrace her true self, and not the bitchy version that was obsessed with popularity. So she had to get this final bit of closure through with. At least she knew that whatever embarrassment happened next, would never leave this room. Sam was trustworthy that way. "Oh I.. I was so stupid and naïve when you told me all of those things. I didn't appreciate them or take them seriously. I.. well I, the point is.." a glistening tear ran down her cheek, her voice trembling, "I think I still love you, Sam. I'm sorry that I didn't figure it all out earlier." her words barely audible.
"Quinn," Sam's voice cracked, "You have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to say that." He took her other hand into his free one, and pulled her down towards him. He stopped, just as her face was hovering above his, clearly giving her the power. The boy whispered, "I love you too. Not past tense, now." Quinn loved how much Sam respected her, how he would never force her to do anything. The girl bent forwards, closing the gap between them. She kissed him softly and sweetly, her lips smiling against his.
After a long while, Quinn drew, hating that the moment had to end. "Is this another concussion dream?" Sam asked, seeming almost dazed. "What are you doing here?"
"No," Quinn smiled. "I saw your family at church today. They told me you were ill and gave me a ride so that I could see you. Oh, actually," the girl sat up, "I better text my mom what time to pick me up."
"No," Sam groaned, pulling her back, "Wow, you're really tiny Q," he frowned. "Don't leave me, please? Now that I've finally gotten you back. Er. You could stay, I mean, if you want. I don't mean anything by that. I'll sleep on the floor or you can stay in Stacey's room, I'm sure she won't mind. I won't try anything, I just like being with you."
"You do realise it's not even lunchtime yet?" Quinn grinned, Sam was such a dork, but that was the main reason she loved him. He was different.
"Even better!" Sam returned the grin, "I can keep you for longer, forever" he murmured, intertwining his fingers with hers. "I better get you a new ring," he said, stroking her hand.
"You don't have to," Quinn climbed into the bed with him, under the covers. She turned so they were spooning, her entire body lined by his. She felt safe, "I still have the last one. I'll stay, Sam. But just like this, nothing more, not yet."
Sam pressed a contented kiss on to the back of Quinn's neck. He moved his lips next to her ear, whispering, "What about this, is that okay?"
Quinn twisted so that they were facing each other. "Yeah, that's okay," she whispered back, pressing her lips against his, more hungrily than the first time. She wrapped her arms around his neck as his slid around her waist, deepening the kiss. Quinn slipped her tongue into his mouth, wanting to feel all of him. She pulled back, suddenly, "Wait, what happened to your migraines?"
"They're pretty much gone now, I just liked the peace and quiet you know? Plus, something better came up now" They both laughed as their lips found each other again.
Thanks for sticking with me through all this!
I hope you liked the chapter! They're finally together!
Any comments/ suggestions/ reviews are muchly appreciated
