J.D. closed his eyes and fell asleep. Dr. Cox smiled as he watched the boy sleep. He enjoyed seeing how peaceful he was when he slept. It had been 4 months since J.D.'s first day and every day Dr. Cox pushed him away. He hated it, but he couldn't let himself get to close to him. He was afraid of what would happen to him if it went downhill.

The door to the on call room opened and Elliot walked in. He frowned he didn't like Barbie too much. She crawled into the bed with J.D. and it woke him up. J.D. smiled when he realized who it was. They kissed and they fell asleep. Dr. Cox's heart fell. He didn't realize that J.D. had been seeing anyone. It killed him to see Barbie in the arms of the young doctor. He couldn't leave though because it might give away that he was watching J.D. , so he was forced to stay in that bed.

Dr. Cox turned quietly so he wouldn't have to see J.D. holding Barbie. He couldn't sleep because it would be too hard. Finally he heard the sound of someone's pager going off. It was J.D., he hoped out of bed not waking Barbie and left. Cox waited till the door closed before moving. He walked out of the room and went to check on some patients. He needed to keep busy or he might just break.

The rest of the day he tried to avoid seeing newbie or Barbie. Even thinking about it made his heart sink. He knew eventually he was going to have to see them together because they wouldn't be able to keep their relationship in the dark. He was right because the next day after rounds he saw the two of them kiss before going separate ways. He frowned as he felt his heart die a little more.

J.D. looked around for his mentor needing a bit of advice on his patient, Mrs. White. She had been in the hospital a week and no one knew what was wrong with her. "Hey Dr. Cox" J.D. said when he spotted him. He swore he say a hint of a smile before he got that look on his face saying he hated to be bothered.

Cox - "What Betty?"

J.D. – "I need some advice on Mrs. White in bed 13"

Cox – "Why what's wrong with her?"

J.D. – "That's the problem, I don't know"

Cox nodded and followed newbie into the room. He ordered a bunch of tests. Once they were back neither could figure out what was wrong. She had gotten paler over the days and her symptoms had gotten worse. 3 days later she was going into multiple organ failure and neither doctor had any clue what was wrong with her. The decided to hit the books. They had spent 4 hours looking through all kinds of medical books when Cox jumped up and said "I know what she has."

It turned out she had some really rare disease that only occurred 1 in 3.5 million or so people. It was nearly unheard of. They treated her and in just a day she was increasingly better. J.D. was so relieved that he made the mistake of hugging Dr. Cox. Dr. Cox allowed it for just a moment before pushing him away and grunting. "Bad newbie" he said and walked away.

As he was walking away Dr. Cox bumped into the Janitor.

Janitor - "Hey, so I've seen how you don't like that new guy"

Cox – "Yeah, and..?"

Janitor – "I know a way we can mess with him"

Cox – "How?"

Janitor – "He keeps a diary, at home"

Cox – "and..?"

Janitor – "well, if I leave early he will know something is up because I wouldn't have bothered him today, but if you're not here he will think you are avoiding him as usual."

Cox – "So I would have to be the one to get the diary"

The janitor nodded and handed him a key labeled J.D. "take this and find his diary." Cox nodded and found Carla. He asked her to cover for his patients and left. He walked into the apartment and walked straight to J.D.'s bedroom. He wasn't going to give the Janitor the diary, but he wanted to read it for himself. He looked around, first under his bed and under his mattress. He searched under the pillows, in the nightstand, and last in his dresser where he found a pink book.

He opened it and walked to J.D.'s bed. He began reading the first entry talking about his first day of work. It talked about what he thought of Dr. Cox. It mentioned several times how attractive he thought Dr. Cox looked. The next page had a list of names, slowly Cox realized it was names he had called the kid. He continued to read on. He read about the torture the Janitor caused him. He read about the torture he himself had caused him. The diary had listed every feeling and every thought the young doctor had ever had towards anyone. He read about how he had started dating Barbie.

He continued to read. He nearly cried when he came to one entry talking about how Cox had become crueler in his name calling. It mentioned that it had finally gotten to him. The entry ended in J.D. saying that he couldn't help but have a crush on Dr. Cox. He closed the book not wanting to read anymore. He placed the little book back into the hiding spot. He left and headed back to the hospital.

Once there he thanked Carla for covering and went to check on Mrs. White. She had gotten better, but he was still worried. He left and was on his way to go grab some food from the lunch room when he got stopped by the Janitor. "Did you find it?" "No" Cox said lying, "He must have it hidden well" the Janitor nodded and let Dr. Cox continue. Just as he walked into the room his pager went off. It was a 911 call to Mrs. White's room. He ran his way there and newbie joined him, but they were too late. The sound of the flat line was all they could hear. Dr. Cox called the time and left. J.D. walked out behind him. He had become much attached to Mrs. White, even more when she started to get better. He walked past Cox and walked into an on call room. Dr. Cox knew he would need somebody so he followed. He pushed his way past just before the door could be locked. The room was empty except for the two. Dr. Cox turned and locked the door before facing J.D. tears were already coming down his face. Dr. Cox pulled him into a hug.