Chapter 18. Rest in peace

Robert had not been able to look at Karen on the drive up to the university. He blamed himself for everything. If he'd been a better husband the first time around, Linda would not have left him for Jeremy…. If he'd been a better father, Sarah would never have resented Karen or Toby, and would never have been traumatized into…. If only, if only if only…

Karen was lost in her own thoughts and recriminations. If she'd been more understanding, she thought to herself, if she'd tried harder to understand the fantasy world that Sarah had once loved with such passion…tears fell freely, and she made no endeavor to brush them away or halt them. If only, if only, if only…

Toby sat in the back seat of the family car, he was still stunned. They had told him his sister would never be coming home. They had told him she was gone, but if that were true, why was it he could still feel her… feel her ever so close? The confused little boy sat wondering what was wrong with all the grown ups.

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Linda and Jeremy arrived ahead of everyone. They sat quietly looking at the building that housed Sarah's dorm room. They had agreed not to go in until Robert and Karen arrived. They were united in this sadness, and were drawing on each other's strengths. This was not a time to be fighting; this was a time to help each other. Not that there had ever been any real arguments between the parents, not even when the marriage had turned to sawdust. Linda had known the best and most stable place for Sarah had been with Robert. However, right now, even that was a painful thought. Linda wondered if things would have been different over the last few years for Sarah if she'd not left, if she'd toughed it out and stayed with Robert and given up her dreams…. If only, if only, if only…

Students saw the famous actress and her famous actor paramour sitting outside the dorms. Not one stopped to ask for an autograph, wishing to give the grieving mother some room to breathe. The outside of the one door building was draped in black crape, and everyone passing it looked at it with somber eyes. Jeremy with his arm around Linda had been silent for a long time, unable to find words to voice the sadness he was feeling. Even though he was not technically a step parent to the girl, he was as fond of her as if he had been. He'd watched her grow though the awkward phase into a charming and disarming young beauty. So like the woman who had captured his heart. He looked at Linda's profile and felt his heart lurch once more.

Linda was aware of his gaze, felt his sympathy, and truly appreciated it. Turning to him she leaned her head on his shoulder and sighed. "I don't know what I'd do if it were not for you," she murmured gratefully. "I'd never be able to face this…"

"I'll always be there for you, darling. You know that." He assured her.

Linda did know she also knew she'd never allow this relationship to go much farther than it had. She had never meant to cause the pain and sorrow that ending her marriage to Robert had caused. "I know," she accepted the assurance in spite of the fact it would go unused.

"She was a wonderful little girl," Jeremy said in a shuddering voice, unable to keep his own sadness hidden any longer. "You were a wonderful mom to her; she was a credit to both you and Robert." He fought back bitter tears, "I'm going to miss her…"

Until that moment, Linda had not realized that Jeremy had even really noticed what she'd done for the girl. Nor had she really taken stock of the fact that her sudden departure from this world would touch this man nearly as deeply as it had touched her. This was a side to Jeremy she had not seen, or really looked for. This was something beyond the flash and flare. This was depth, feeling, and Linda was not prepared for it.

Stiffeling back the sadness, Jeremy pointed to the sedan coming up the road. "That's Robert now," He rose, helping Linda to her feet.

Robert pulled into the space in front of the dorm building, cut off the engine and emerged from the car. Coming around to the front, he opened the door and allowed Karen to step out. She in turn opened the back door for Toby who bounded out like a caged animal glad to be free. The adults moved toward each other and then to Toby's amazed eyes, they embraced. Jeremy and Robert, Karen and Linda, stood holding onto each other for comfort and strength.

"I'm so sorry," Karen sobbed.

"Me too," Linda moaned.

Toby could not understand what all this fuss was over. Why were the grownups crying? And why did they keep saying Sarah would not come home any more? He wanted to shout at them all, but knew he shouldn't.

Linda looked down at the boy, releasing his mother, the actress stooped down. "Got a hug for your Auntie Linda?" she asked softly.

Toby could see the woman needed a hug, and gave it to her willingly, but wondered when she'd become Auntie Linda instead of just Sarah's mama.

Jeremy sniffed back his tears watching his lady hug the boy. "He's growing into fine young man." He complemented Robert.

Robert shoved his hands in his pockets, wishing he had a briefcase or papers to fumble with. "He's a good boy." He looked at the actor, and saw him as a man, not a rival, just a man. "Thank you for being here." He said feeling real gratitude for the support.

The Actor clasped his hands behind his back, feeling a bit helpless and at odds ends. "I wish there were more I could do," he said firmly.

One of the University's administrators finally arrived; the odd little man had a gnomish appearance and squinted as he looked at them. "The Cystennin family should be arriving any moment." He said briskly as he looked at his watch. "Have you any idea of how long it will take for you to pack up?"

Linda blinked, feeling her "Irish" rise. "It will take as long as it takes," she growled.

Both Jeremy and Robert had to look away before they'd burst out laughing. Sad or not, no one rushed Linda, and she was letting the little official feel her anger. Even Karen had to hide the smile that had suddenly appeared.

The gnomish man muttered something under his breath about how it would have been easier to just have the remaining roommate pack up and ship the belongs of the dead girls to the two families. He looked at his pocket watch again and tapped his toe impatiently. Clearly, not liking to be kept waiting, he acted as if he had somewhere more important to be. He began to pace the side walk up and down nervously while awaiting the other family. He looked at his watch once more, "You would think people would be on time for appointments," he muttered aloud.

The four adults stared at him, mouths agape.

"I don't have all day," he snapped peevishly. "Should have gotten a janitor to do this," he groused.

"You are aware that our daughter has just passed away, aren't you?" Robert asked voicing the hostility the little man was inciting.

He looked at the man addressing him as if Robert were some inconsequential trifling knave or student. "Well, we would not be here, having to clean up after them if they had been on campus instead of gallivanting all over the countryside," snapped the little gnome. "Stupid girls chasing around with those hooligans…." He muttered darkly.

Robert who hated feeling as if he'd been kept in the dark, exploded. "What the hell are you talking about?"

The diminutive man glared at the one who had just shouted at him. "I'm sure when Dr. Wheeler called you, he informed you of the circumstances."

"Actually, no," Robert moved forward, using his best courtroom serious business face. "So perhaps you should explain the circumstances to me…"

The gnomish man backed up. "That is not within my authority!" He looked panicked as he moved back from the group. "I was only to allow you access to the dorm, not give explanations…" he began to fret and wring his hands. "Why do they always do this to me?" he bemoaned. "I should have known things would not be simple…. The office was to give you the information… not rely on me to do it…"

Robert wondered if the little man were about to bolt. "See here, whoever you are…"

"Whoever?" he repeated suddenly incensed that they had no idea of whom he was or his importance. "I am Professor Hinrich Gerhardt, that's who I am!"

Linda moved forward swiftly, "Professor," she turned on the charm. "Would you do us the eminence favor of asking for some one from the administration to come and see us?"

The distraction had worked, as Linda knew it would and the little man was placated for a moment. "I will see if someone is available," he said before pointing to the side walk. "Do not move from here." He warned as he moved to the dorm building alone.

"What was that all about?" Karen asked shaking her head. She looked at Linda, "At least you got him to quiet down."

Linda shrugged. "It's a gift." She then looked at Robert, "I think you'd better use your Perry Mason impression," she suggested softly. "He's like Judge Ralston."

"Who's Judge Ralston?" Karen asked as Linda took a seat on the bench beside her.

"The first judge that Robert tried a case before," Linda said with a bit of a grin. "He was just like the little professor… lots of self important bluster." She pointed to Robert who was wincing at the memory of the elderly judge. "He almost got himself put in jail for contempt of court… and had we not been watching a old rerun of Perry Mason that evening, he'd have spent a good deal of time cooling his heals in a jail cell."

Karen snickered, and could not look at her husband. "Oh I can see it now."

Linda giggled. "Ralston was a ball buster," she whispered something into Karen's ear and the pair sputtered with giggles. Jeremy cleared his throat to alert them that the gnome was returning.

Professor Gerhardt, stony faced moved toward them as if he was afraid they had something that might be catching. "Doctor Carlson, the University President will be here directly to …deal with you…" He sniffed and gave them all a very superior glare, "I have been relieved of my duty here, and I bid you all good day." Turning on his heel, he strode away.

"Old Ralston," Robert agreed as he looked down at his wife and ex wife seated on the bench.

"Robert, just what did they say when they called?" Linda asked thinking about the little man's harsh words. "Where was Sarah?"

"It was a very sketchy call," Robert sighed. "Some official from the school called to say there'd been an accident… then the state police called… and then some fellow with a Greek name called… But no one said much of where, when or how… I figured we'd get the information here." He noticed a car pulling slowly up the road. "I'll bet that's the Cystennin family arriving."

The car was a small older model Chevy, being driven by a man who like Robert looked something of being at a loss for understanding. The woman in the front seat had reddish gold hair that was pulled up on her head in a classic French Knot. They were not dressed in the latest fashions, nor were they dressed shabbily. They looked like an average couple of middle aged parents, and if not for the somber expressions on their faces anyone would have thought they were here to visit their child.

Robert moved forward, extending his hand. "I'm Robert Williams," he introduced himself. "Sarah's father…This is my wife Karen, and our son Toby… my daughter's mother, Linda and her beau Jeremy. You must be the Cystennin family."

"Yes, I'm Errol Cystennin, this is my wife, Joanna," the man accepted the hand offered. "Has anyone explained what happened?"

"We're waiting for the University's President to address that question." Robert said courteously. "However they are insisting that we wait here, before going up to the dorm room." He noticed a man coming up the walk way in a hurried fashion. He certainly didn't look like the president of a university, nor did he look like a professor. He looked like an over worked clerk.

When the man stopped his rushed steps, he took a deep breath. "I'm Paul Tibits, Doctor Carlson's assistant; I do apologize for the mix-ups here. You were not supposed to be directed to come to the dorms… I'm afraid they are under police seal for right now." He seemed very embarrassed and willing to do what he could to make amends. "I understand that you've not been given any clear information on the…accident…" He looked more than embarrassed now, he looked mortified. "I'm afraid what we have is not going to do much in clearing things up either."

Mrs. Cystennin frowned, "Police seal, I don't understand, whatever for?" She looked from one confused face to another. "Why is there no officer here giving us a report?"

Robert wondered how things got done with these people being so inept. "Just what can you tell us?"

Tibits looked like a deer in the headlights. "It's just a formality," he assured the parents. "As you know the girls were not on campus when they…" He stopped, looked at the parents and read their expressions. "Good lord, you don't know…do you?"

Reaching forward Robert took hold of the man's lapel, drawing him closer. "We know nothing…go from there…Just where were our daughters and what happened?"

"They were…visiting friends off campus, as I understand it." The little man seemed more nervous then ever. "Making some kind of amateur music video…" He swallowed hard, "They were friends with this group that had rented out an old abandoned Mental institution. One of the buildings had a large room where they were staging a dance sequence and the three girls were doing some kind of set up… This use to be mining country some time ago… most of the mines are abandoned and long since petered out…. The grounds of their friends compound was above a pocket of an old mine… As we understand it there was a build up of coal gases and they erupted. That's what caused the explosion…"

"Three girls?" Robert asked. "You said three girls were in that building…"

Tibits nodded sadly. "Yes, I'm afraid one girl was thrown by the force of the blast. She survived, but she's…. badly injured, and completely traumatized." He continued on. "We are just now waiting for the go ahead from the police to take down the yellow tape…. Once they've given us the all clear, you will be allowed entry into the dorm room. Doctor Carlson asked me to invite you to come down to the administration building until then for refreshment, and he will himself come to speak to you once he is free."

An hour later, and two cups for week coffee, they were still waiting. Robert was beginning to look as if he were going to burst. At last the door opened and a haggard man entered the room. He moved toward Robert, seeing him as the natural person in charge of the assembled adults in the room. "I am so sorry for having kept you waiting, unavoidable I'm afraid." He offered his hand. "I do wish to extend my condolences to both your families, I am sorry for your loss."

"Is there anything you can tell us?" Robert asked giving the ma a firm handshake.

"Other than what my assistant told you, no," he answered. "The state police have been investigating and the mining authority has as well. I'm afraid we are as much in the dark on this as you are." The man, a well groomed but tired looking academic motioned everyone to take a seat. He took one and spoke respectfully. "I'm so sorry about all this confusion."

"The girl who survived;" Robert didn't seem able to release his qualms and thoughts. "Where is she now?"

"Convalescing as I understand it," Carlson explained. "I'm told the three girls were unusually close, that they had attended St. Ambrose together."

Mr. Cystennin nodded, "That's right; they graduated together and also took some early credit courses here last year." He held his wife's hand gently. "Our Bryn and Lilith and Sarah were inseparable. You say Lilith survived the blast… are her parents coming up?"

Doctor Carlson shook his head, "Miss Timofia's mother is out of the country right now…she's actually being cared for by friends… the same friends who were renting the grounds…" He didn't seem comfortable speaking of Lilith.

"Is there something she could tell us?" Robert asked. "She was there, is there anymore she can give us?"

The man heaved a heavy sigh, "I really don't feel she could… you see she seems to have been so traumatized by the entire episode that she's… well we fear she's not quite right in her head." He leaned forward, uncomfortable discussing the third girl with these parents. "She's under heavy sedation right now, and will have to under go a great deal of therapy to learn to deal with the horror of what she witnessed." Carlson frowned. "They had to pull her out of the building, literally dug her out of rubble before the entire structure collapsed."

"That poor girl," Joanna murmured softly.

Doctor Carlson stood up, "I am sorry that there's so little information to be given, but please, stay here, I'll have some lunch brought in for you… I do expect to hear from the State authorities this afternoon, and then I should be able to give you some better information… Oh and we've set the guest house in Professor's Row aside for your use. Once we've heard from the authorities my assistant will guide you over and get you settled. Again, I'm very sorry for your loss."

Once the man had exited, Linda moved to where Robert was standing. "How do you read him?" she asked swiftly, quietly, as if they were being observed.

"He's not telling us everything he knows," Robert said just as quietly before walking over to Errol, "I think we're being handed a white wash."

Errol frowned, "I don't understand why," he looked about the room as if looking for a microphone or a camera. "Our girls were not into anything… illegal were they?"

"Not to my knowledge," Karen said defensively. "Sarah really hated taking any kind of medication… I can't see her doing recreational drugs," she turned to Linda. "Can you?"

"No," the actress pursed her lips. "But Robert is right; something is really out of whack here." She tapped her chin with one long finger nail. "Did you notice how he made real sure we would not want to talk to Lilith?" She inclined her head, "I'm not saying the girl is not traumatized, but I think she's our key to what happened."

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Carlson dialed a number and waited, "I'm glad I reached you," he said swiftly. "The parents are here…yes, they are asking questions…NO... No I didn't make any suggestions. I think you should know, they are asking about Lilith." He listened and winced once or twice. "Yes, Mr. Karass…. I understand your son wants this kept quiet… but I really don't see how…" He rubbed his eyes as he listened again. "Sir, this is not like the other stunts… two girls are dead…"

The man took a seat behind his desk, "I understand," he muttered darkly. "No, I'm not blaming your son… I doubt anyone could or would." His voice rose. "I know they are saying it was a build up of coal and methane gases….." He listened again. "Do you think that's wise? Yes, I suppose your right…if Ari comes and speaks to them… yes… yes… I'll make the arrangements my self, sir." He hung the phone up and pressed the button for his secretary. When the woman entered he gave instructions. "An officer of the mining commission is on his way over, when he arrives would you have the two families in the reception room come in here?"

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Costas Karass stood in his office looking out the window, awaiting his son's arrival. Ari had been sent for; now all the elder Karass could do was wait. He was use to being kept waiting for his son, but it never seemed to get any easier for the elder. Ari was the child of his old age, a son after six daughters. Karass knew he'd spoiled the boy, often railing at others in the family and defending the lad. He had taken pride in the young man's independent spirit and lust for life. He'd boasted that his son was a man's man, and now… now he was praying to all the old Gods that he could deal with what they had placed on his plate.

Ari entered the room, no longer dressed in leathers and biker gear. He was now dressed in expensive slacks and a turtle neck sweater. "Papa," he said softly to gain his father's attention. "You sent for me?"

Costas didn't look, he merely nodded. "The girl," he inquired thoughtfully.

"She's resting," Ari joined him at the large window overlooking the large factory and its vast layout of buildings on the track of land owned and operated by the family. "Doctor Miller has turned her case over to Doctor Danvers, yet again."

"The police report and the mining authority report agree that you had nothing to do with the explosion." Costas said relieved.

Not content for an unspoken lie to be between them, Ari shook his head. "That's not entirely true and you and I both know it."

Looking at the younger man, the elder took his time in putting his next thoughts into words. "What were you thinking? Did you not know what they were doing?"

Ari shrugged, "I didn't really care," his voice was honest. "All I wanted was Lilith, Papa."

The elder's face showed concern. "Do you want her still?" When the younger man nodded, Costas sighed. "I've made arrangements with her mother… you and the girl will be married…that will protect both you and she…now…there is something you must do. The families of the two girls who are gone," he refused to say dead if he didn't have to. "They are at the University awaiting some word on what happened… I want you to face them, give them what you can." He placed his hand on his son's shoulder. "Do this and close this chapter of this book."

"Yes Papa," Ari said dutifully.

Costas embraced his son, "Lilith will be protected, even from herself." The elder promised as he held tightly his son.

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Robert read over the accident report and the miners report as well. "There was no warning?"

The man from the Miner's Commission shrugged. "I'm afraid there seldom is, sir."

"I thought the mine emissions were monitored;" Errol looked at the report over Robert's shoulder; having been involved in the mines as a younger man he had more understanding of the report than Robert had. He read over the same section of the report again.

"Most of the mines are monitored," the official stiffened. "That one was not even on the list of old mines. Some of them did and do fall between the cracks."

Errol shot the man a acerbic gaze; "Am I to understand my daughter is dead because a few mines have fall between the cracks? Well that sir is unacceptable!"

Robert placed a hand on the hand beside his on the table. "Easy Errol." He warned before looking at the man from the mine commission. "My friend here is right, it is unacceptable." Shoving the report back at the official Robert stood up. "How many other mines have fallen between the cracks?"

Doctor Carlson could almost feel sorry for the man from the Miner's Commission. The parents had been much easier on the officers from the state. This one they were putting through the wringer.

"We are doing our best tracking them down," the man said defensively. "However you must understand, not all the mines that operated here about were even legal, some were never registered with the commission." Swiftly he changed his tact, "I am very sorry for your loss. I know that no matter what we do, it will not make up for the loss of your daughters."

Doctor Carlson waited until the man had packed up his reports, promising copies for the parents and departed. He then said quietly, "I've made arrangements with the board for a quiet memorial to be held tomorrow here for your daughters, I hope that's satisfactory and acceptable." His secretary popped her head in and Carlson motioned her to give entry to the man standing behind her.

Ari Karass entered the room looking very somber, "Doctor Carlson, I hope you'll forgive this intrusion."He looked at the parents, and bowed curtly. "I'm Aristotle Karass, my friends' call me Bear… Lilith Timofia is my girlfriend… I'm the one who rented the old asylum…" He introduced himself. "I'm so very sorry…Sarah and Bryn…were friends of mine as well."

Linda backed up; Jeremy knew that something had spooked her. He placed his hand to her waist and braced her. She suddenly griped him and held on for dear life. Jeremy stood steadfastly, giving her what strength he could.

Robert noticed his ex's reaction and went on guard. "Mr. Karass can you tell us what the girls were doing off campus in the middle of a school week?" the tone was accusatory, and Robert didn't care.

Ari nodded, "I think I can… it was Halloween, and the girls wanted to come out for a bonfire and to cut up a bit…. No liquor, just music and dancing… and the fire…. I have a band, The Outlaws, and we cut a record deal… the girls were going to help with a music video… they thought it was the perfect time to work on the staging and costuming….As I understand it, Sarah is the one who supplied the leather outfits…" Linda groaned and he continued. "The three of them were in the studio doing some warm ups and the rest of us were to join them…The bonfire was dying down and Snake, that's Steven's nick name… Steven was the guy that Bryn was sort of seeing…anyway…HE and I were on our way to check out what the girls had set up…when we felt the ground start to quake…"

"A bonfire?" Robert asked pulling at straws.

Ari shook his head, "That was my first question, Mr. Williams isn't it? I asked if our fire could have been the spark that set off the explosion, but the commission says no." He looked deeply remorseful. "I'd give anything if both Sarah and Bryn were still with us…they were so full of life…"

Linda turned away, unable to hear the rest of what the young Greek man was saying. She placed her head on Jeremy's shoulder and let her tears fall.