Chapter was re-written 1/03 -2008

A narrowed field of vision that seems to demand atonement

In the past three years, where I haven't seen you,

I've been living in this clear, almost frozen, pale-white world

Come back to me, you're the only one I want

The fire still burning and smoldering inside me

I'm getting sick of waiting for the rain to subside,

Secluding myself from people as if it's for my own good

I'm leaving all that was to be left wandering

To be waiting like this…

Guess I left it there---

"Rachel, have you seen Chris?" Rachel's mother asked.

"No, I haven't." Rachel replied, "Probably out training that ugly thing."

Rachel's mother sighed, "Well, let's hope he's back in good time for lunch…"

Rachel didn't bother replying.

Jupp, that's me for you folks! I'm a girl, I have my standards, and I don't want to raise something like that so I passed it to my brother. It's still mine only that I let him take care of it. I'll probably pass it on completely within some time and exchange for a cute pokémon. I'm not even sure why I bother so much about cute pokémon since I'm not that in to pokémon. Guess I really have high standards as a bitch.

Rachel closed her book to go downstairs to help her mother with lunch.
"Hey, mom." She said as she walked down the stairs.
"Oh, hi, Rach," Her mother greeted her.
She skipped the 2 last steps on the stairs and walked over to her mother, "Need some help?"
Her mother smiled, "Yes, why not? You can chop some vegetables."
Rachel brought out the utensils and started to chop vegetables. There was a silence between them before her mother broke it with her nagging.
"You're doing it wrong." She said.
"How can I chop something wrong?" Rachel snapped back.
Her mother pointed at a piece of carrot that Rachel recently chopped, "That one is too big."
"Oh, jeez, I'm sorry, I can just split that on then!"
Then it became quiet again.
"You should really learn to show some respect, Rachel." Her mother suddenly said.
Rachel groaned and put the knife on the chopping board, "I did, didn't I? I came down here to help you and it would be so much easier if you could just stop nagging me."
Her mother returned to blend the soup she was cooking, "Well, show respect a little more often than just rarely…"
Rachel stomped out from the kitchen, "I won't fucking change completely just because I'm not the perfect daughter!"

5 hours later, it was time for dinner, Chris hadn't returned home yet.

"I'm starting to get really worried… Where could he be?"

"He's fine… He's 11 years old, what could happen. Most people get their own pokémon and leave home when they're 10." Rachel said.

"I'm going out to find him." Rachel's mom said. "If he comes home when I'm not home, tell him that he's grounded for a month!"

"Mmm…" Rachel answered. Then she thought back on what had happened earlier today,

"Sis, shouldn't you be training?" Chris asked.

Rachel groaned, "No, can't you see that I-m busy reading?!"

"What'cha readin'? Letters from your so called 'boyfriend'?" Chris teased her.

"Ahrg! Do you want me to shove this pen up your ass?!" Rachel yelled.

"Gee relax." Chris frowned, "Why do you have a pokémon if you don't even want it?"

"I didn't catch it, Elli did." Rachel replied. "Hey, look, if it bothers you so much, why don't you train it?!" Rachel returned to the book she was reading.

"Okay." Chris shrugged his shoulders. "So, do I get to keep her?"

Rachel looked up from the book at her brother. "You want it?" she asked in a bored tone.

Chris looked excited, "Yeah!"

"Then no" Rachel returned to her book again.

"You can be really mean sometimes." Chris said before he left the room.

'This story is really good.' Rachel thought. 'I wonder is I also could become a poet…? Hmm…?'

Rachel got out from her thoughts when she heard the door slam open. She looked behind her and there stood Chris, wet from the rain and all muddy. Rachel shivered from the mud.

"Hey sis!" Chris said as he ran indoors. He tossed the pokéball to Rachel. She caught it but quickly placed it on the table since it was wet and a little muddy. She stood up to make sure that she didn't have any dirt on her clothes.

"Yeah, what is it?" Rachel replied annoyed. "Must be something meaningless because you skipped both dinner and lunch for that…"

"Hey check it out, Feebas has grown much stronger than yesterday!" Chris said. "It even learned a new attack!"

Rachel returned to reading, "That's good…"

"Have you considering giving Feebas a nickname?"

Rachel sighed, "Why should I?"

Chris snatched the book out of her hand, "Hey, I'm talking about your pokémon right now! You could learn something just by listening!" Chris yelled. "You don't even care do you?!"

"Just shut up and give me back my book!" Rachel yelled back.

"You know, you should really start taking responsibility over your own pokémon!"

"And why should I?!" Rachel yelled, "I don't even want it!"

"It's a she, not it!"

"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about it!"

"If you hate her so much, then why would you even bother keeping her?!! You're too self-centered and selfish to have a pokémon either way, even if you wanted one!!"
"Why would I care, it's not like all life revolves about pokémon." Rachel groaned.
"Of course not, because it's revolving about you all the time!" Chris yelled back.
Rachel sighed annoyed, "And what do you mean about that?"
"That you're so fucking self centered that there's no room for other people except for you in your little world."

Rachel slapped him, "SHUT UP!"

"Bitch!!" Chris yelled at her before he stormed out, "I'm not coming back, and you can just go to hell!"

"Hey!" Rachel called after him and ran to the door "Give me my book back!"
But Chris was to fast for a bitch in high-heels and Rachel didn't bother chasing him out in the rain. "I hate mud and annoying kids!" she said as she closed the door.

It started to turn to late evening. Rachel had started to read a new book. "I wonder why Anton hasn't replied in a while… After all, its 3 days left before Elli will pick me up." She sighed. "Maybe he had moved on and can only think about pokémon…."

There was a knock on the door. "Rachel? Can I come in?"

Rachel closed her book, "Sure" she sighed.

Her mom entered, "Have you seen Chris?"

"Not since he called me a bitch and ran out. That was around… 6 o'clock I think."

"Well its 8.30 now, he's not allowed to be out later than 7 without permission!" she sighed.

Rachel sat up in her bed, "Look mom, Chris is growing up, it's common that kids leave home at 10 years age. He's really committed to pokémon and you'll just have to get used to it that he's out often training, and that he'll one day leave home and explore new lands."

Rachel's mom looked at her, "You're right… But if he's not home at 10, we'll go look for him, okay?"

Rachel lay down and returned to her book, "He'll be home before that, he's to chicken to stay out to late."

Rachel's mom left the room.

"I wonder why Chris is so into pokémon. He's always been interested and studied them but… Why make such a big deal that I don't want to care of Feebas or something like that… Sigh Sometimes I don't get kids…"

Rachel then remembers something from 5 years ago

Chris: 'Someday, I'm going to leave home and become the pokémon master!'

He was waving his hands in the air excitingly.

Anton: Heheh, hey, you still have 4 years left before you can get your pokémon. I'll be waaay ahead of you before you even get your first pokémon!"

Chris: H-hey! You want to become the pokémon master too!?

Anton: Nah, I want to become a great pokémon breeder. What about you, Rach?

Rachel: Na-uh. I'm not going on a stupid journey with those creatures, I want a real job, duh!

Chris: That sounds boring...

Rachel: WHAT?! WHAT'S SO BETTER THAN AIMING FOR AN IMPOSSIBLE DULL DREAM THAN ACTUALLY HAVE A NORMAL LIFE?!

Chris: Heh, you're so simple minded… I want to become the pokémon master with my favorite pokémon so that I can prove that you actually can become a great pokémon trainer without worrying that you'll only need strong pokémon, that you can actually win with your favorite! Plus, even if I don't become a pokémon master I want to go on a long journey and prove to trainers that they should se the pokémon personality before its looks and strengths. That's my dream. It may seem impossible, like chasing a rainbow without those pretty colors. But a dream is a dream, and I'll do anything just to be near to fulfill it, and everything near me, like my friends, my pokémon, my family, will bring me closer to that rainbow, even if I don't even see me getting close to it or it slipping away. At least I tried, right? The most important thing when wanting a dream to fulfill is that you'll have to try your best yourself.

"Chris…" Rachel got up from the bed and ran outdoors. "CHRIS!" She yelled. "CHRIIIS!!"

She ran down the road further.

"Damn it! Where can that idiot be?! CHRIS!"

She ran across the bridge and passes the big trees. Then she heard something behind the trees. "Chris! Are you there?!"

There was no answer.

"Damn it!"

She made her way through the bushes and saw a small little boy near a pond with a familiar looking pokémon. She ran up to him and hit him on his head from behind.

"Ow!" he turned rapidly around, "Who---"

Rachel smirked, "Hey, mom's worried about you, time to return home…"

"Humph…" He returned to look at the pond. "Just go away."

She grabbed his shirt, "Hey you listen to me! Okay, I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings, I'm sorry that I seemed so shallow, I'm sorry that I made you lose hope about your dream making people less shallow, okay? So if you would just return home for mom's sake, not mine if you don't want to, okay?"

"Sure… Like I'd return for Mom's sake…" he answered sarcastically.
"Well you gonna!" Rachel said.
Chris looked tiredly at her, "Would you?"
That question chocked Rachel. She thought for a long moment, "I guess not…"
"Well, that's my answer too. So what makes you think that I'm going to return home now, huh?" Chris said and tried to make his sister drop him, which she did. He landed straight in to a mud puddle. Chris looked surprised at his sister. She just stared emptily at him. That look she had on her face and that she didn't care that she had mud on her face and clothes made him realized that he had crossed the line with her.
"Fine," she said, "Don't come home. Mom won't care for so long anyways, she won't miss you, and I actually think that she would be happier without you."
Chris got up from the ground and stared back at his sister.
"Do you want to know why?" she asked.
Chris shrugged his shoulders and mumbled a quiet whatever.
"Because she hates us, remember? We remind her to much about dad," Rachel said, "She would be much happier if we disappeared out from her life so she wouldn't have anything left that reminded her of dad."
"Uhm, okay," Chris said, looking a bit confused, "first it was about me and now about us? You said that If I left she would be much happier 'cause then she won't see us?"
Rachel raised her chin, still staring at Chris, "Because if you left, I'll go with you."
Chris backed away in shock, "What?"
"You're my brother, you're the only one I have left near me that I care about. If you left I would have to follow you just so I wouldn't have to be alone." She reached her hand out to him, "Come home for now? You can plan on running away some other time. You should at least pack your bags."
"Oh… okay…" Chris said.
"Here's Phoebe's pokémon ball by the way." Rachel threw the pokémon ball to Chris.
"Phoebe…? Is that a nickname for Feebas?"

She shrugged her shoulders, "Whatever you want it to be, come on! You can start packing when you get home if you want to leave soon!"

At home Rachel looked at her almost finished letter to Anton.

"Chris is so committed because ha has a dream to follow. Do I have a dream? Do I have a future? Maybe… maybe if I go on a journey myself, I can find some of the answers to my own questions and maybe find a dream…"

"I'm sorry Anton, I'm going to ditch you for living my own life!" She threw out the ball of paper through the window and landed in the river.

"Maybe this isn't the right thing to do… But it feels good, then its right for me!"

Suddenly the door behind her opened. She turned the chair rapidly and saw her brother. He stood there in his PJ's rubbing his eyes. "Hey, Rach, Please keep it down a little, okay? I'm trying to sleep…" he said.
Rachel smiled shyly, "Oops, sorry, bro!"
He closed the door carefully. Rachel continued to look out through the window and smiled over the fact that she was really happy.

Review please:D