Sabaku No Gaara – 19 January

When he woke up that morning, it was just one more day for the Kazekage of Sunagakure – Sabaku no Gaara – but for the rest of the village it was so much more.

What once used to be a day shunned by as the day that brought a monster into Suna was now celebrated by all the villages' inhabitants as the Kazekage's birthday. Had it been any of the previous Kazekage's birthdays, celebrations would be minimal, but this was Kazekage Gaara's birthday and no expense would be spared.

Why? Because Gaara was a hero of course!

A true hero.

A hero who had saved the village from some insane blonde hermaphrodite and its clay bombs.

A hero who had died and been brought back to life.

A hero who was really, really . . . well really gorgeous really!

And so the fan clubs prepared and practised for their introductions to the mysterious redhead, they painted their banners and perfected their swoons, while all the while Gaara slept soundly. It was one of the good things about having Shukkaku removed – if somewhat forcefully – he could sleep at last.

It also gave his two elder siblings time to meticulously plan their "super surprise party", though they never referred to it as such in public. Ninjas did not say "super"

Unfortunately however, as Gaara slept he dreamt of all his previous birthdays. But when he dreamed of such things Gaara's dreams quickly reverted into nightmares.

"Shh! He's coming!"

"It's that boy again – the monster"

As Gaara walked through the streets he heard those spiteful whispers and saw the hateful, frightened stares from the villagers.

Why do they all stare at me like that? The young redhead asked himself in despair.

The small boy continued along the streets to his home, seeing black banners of mourning fluttering in the desert wind and knowing they were for him.

He tried desperately to ignore the taunts and hushed words as he continued on his way, but his sand did not block them out as effectively as it did the rocks hurled at his head.

"Why Yashamaru?" he cried, clutching his teddy bear to his chest "why do they hate me?"

"They don't hate you" his uncle replied, a fake pasted across his face "they just don't understand"

There was a flash of red and a dark sky filled with Kunai was held frozen for a split second before all the sharp, deadly blades honed to perfection came swooping towards him, the nearest heat source.

But there was his sand! Curling around him, suffocating him, drowning him and cutting off the small light that had filtered through into this nightmare –

Gaara woke with no sign of his discomfort but a slight frown dusted over his forehead. As he donned his official robes, Gaara's excellent hearing picked up the dulcet tones of his comrades from the land of fire.

"YOSH!" called one

"Dattebayo!" added the other

"You're so youthful Naruto-kun" declared the first voice in a somewhat weepy and awed tone.

It was at this moment that a somewhat disgruntled Temari forced her way through her little brother's office door. "I don't carehow you do it or what it is you do to them" she said, clutching the frame of the door so hard that Gaara was surprised it was still intact" but make them stop, or I will be forced to bury their bodies up to their necks in sand in the middle of the desert and watch as they burn alive"

The ever unruffled Gaara simply nodded his assent and waved for someone to fetch him the two vibrantly coloured and over-energetic shinobi from Konoha who had managed to wheedle a vacation out of their Hokage. Once they were fetched however they insisted on being shown around the whole of Sunagakure by the Kazekage himself. And who was Gaara to refuse them?

So with a final application of eyeliner and an unnoticed long-suffering sigh, Gaara was seized by the arms and dragged unresistingly through his hometown, occasionally pointing out the location of a failed attempt on his life. An act which - very fortunately - silenced Lee and Naruto for a few seconds before they regained their "youthfulness" and continued with talk of training and reaching their dreams.

As the day grew to an end and the air got steadily cooler and cooler until both Naruto and Lee were seeking heat from their favourite mass murderer - and surreptitiously giving each other death glares if they felt their opponent was getting too clingy - Gaara decided it was finally time to lead the two back home. Opening doors, gates and completing other equally menial tasks with his sand was declared "excellent training" by the beautiful green beast of Konoha while the number one knucklehead ninja muttered ominously that Gaara was even more of a lazy-ass than Shikamaru.

But poor, unfortunate Gaara had still not reached the end of his long day yet. As though the hardship of getting through the streets of his very own desert town without being either attacked by fangirls, force-fed tastes of tonight's party foods and avoiding assassination attempts weren't enough, poor, unfortunate Gaara still had one more thing to endure . . .

"SURPRISE!" The sensitive ears of the boy nearly caved in from shock, and though any reaction to this cry of delight was hidden, near-death experiences in the form of heart attacks were experienced.

"do you like it!?" slurred his inebriated brother "it was a surprise"

"yeah" added his equally alcohol soaked sister "a surprise party"

The two of them stumbled away, giggling and while the party-goers were busy being deafened by his green and orange clad companion Gaara murmured "Yes. It is . . . super."

END!

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