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Clarke wakes up after the best night's sleep ever. She allows herself to smile when she fells the younger woman wrapped in her embrace; limbs tangled to the point that she doesn't know where she ends and Lexa starts. She's never felt this comfortable waking up with a lover before; until she doesn't.
As she has a tendency to do when she's around Lexa, her happiness turns to fear. She untangles herself from the younger woman, and lets out an almighty sigh, that turns into a breathy "shit." As in shit what has she done? She runs her hand through her hair as she looks down at the still sleeping brunette. What a beautiful sight. Clarke is so conflicted, she doesn't know what to do. She decides to face that dilemma after a shower, and she skulks still naked into her bathroom.
She quickly turns the shower on, and steps in, she puts the heat high, it's almost burning her skin. Burning away Lexa. At the thought of the younger woman, she's instantly transported back to last night, she can see Lexa's lips on her, can feel them. She remembers screaming the younger woman's name, god how she wants to do that again. Clarke decides the temperature in the shower needs to decrease by a fair few degrees. She hates that at the edge of every single memory she has of Lexa is tinged with the thought that she can't escape from. 'She's your student. What the fuck are you doing'.
Lexa had woken up, she guesses a few seconds after Clarke. She almost died and went to heaven went she felt the gorgeous blond snuggle into her from behind. But it didn't last, within what felt like milliseconds, Clarke had extracted herself from their entanglement. Lexa heard her teachers frustrated sigh, and Lexa knew that Clarke thought last night was a huge mistake, she felt her heart drop into her feet. She felt Clarke's weight leave the bed, and heard the quiet slam of what she presumes is the bathroom door; her assumption is confirmed a few moments later when she hears water starting to pour from the shower.
She can't bear to wait for Clarke and see the regret in her eyes, so she quickly and quietly makes her way downstairs and redresses in her clothes from yesterday. She glances back upstairs, the shower is still running. She slips through the front door, and decides to head home where she can shower and change; and try and forget about last night. That was going to prove difficult. How stupid has she been, what did she actually would come from getting involved with a teacher.
XXXXXXXXXX
Lexa walks down the stairs of her own home, towel drying her hair after showering and changing, it made her feel slightly better; however, she still feels like her heart has been ripped out of her chest. She's surprised to be met by Bellamy sitting on the couch in her front room. He smirks at the look of surprise on her face, and she can't help but reciprocate.
"What are you doing here?" As much as she loves all of her friends, her house isn't really a hangout for them. Given that her mum is usually around the place smashed which is massively awkward.
Bellamy gets it, he isn't offended by Lexa's words. "I needed to talk, I figured when you weren't at Anya's or Finn's you must be here." He shrugs. "Unless there is really something going on with you and Miss Griffin." He wiggles his eyebrows.
Lexa's heart almost stops beating, but she recovers enough so that he expression stays neutral. She even manages to roll her eyes, which Bellamy seems to accept as confirmation that he's being ludicrous.
She flops down onto the couch next to Bell, and leans into his side, he adjusts to place his arms around her, and she snuggles into his embrace. They stay like that for a while both really needing the comfort. It's Lexa that finally breaks the comfortable silence.
"So what do you want to talk about Bell?"
She pulls herself up, so she can look him in the eyes. He looks almost upset, conflicted even. She can tell that he's really thinking about how to word whatever he's about to say.
"You were right Lex. The Azgeda wouldn't attack Finn for no reason." He chances looking up, and can see he has his friends full attention. "So what I want to know is why?"
Lexa can't deny that the same question has been playing on her mind. Bellamy was right, the attack had all the hallmarks of the Azgeda, so why on earth would they attack Finn? She sighs as she mulls it over.
"I should have done more Lex." She's surprised when Bellamy starts to speak again. "I was right there with him, and just watched it happen."
She pulls on his arm to make sure she has his attention. "Listen to me Bell, what could you have possibly done? If it was as professional as you say it was, you'd have ended up dead too if you'd have tried to stop it."
She can see that she's fighting back the emotion, not convinced by her words. She squeezes his leg. "Bellamy nobody thinks this was your fault."
"Except for me." He plants a weary smile on his face. "I need to know Lexa."
She sighs. "Me too." She concedes.
"I just don't know how we're ever going to find out Bellamy." She's already made her position regarding getting involved with the Azgeda clear, she has no idea how else they're going to find out what the hell happened on Friday night.
Bellamy has clearly been thinking about it. "If the Azgeda are off limits then we attack from another angle."
He takes in the look of confusion on Lexa's face and it spurs him on. "Finn. He must have been mixed up in something he shouldn't have been, so we go through his things and see what we can find."
"That's a great idea Bell, but the police have taken all of his things, his laptop his mobile and stuff." She doesn't even try to hide her sarcasm.
"They have his stuff now, but they'll pass it back to his Mum and Dad once they processed it, shouldn't be too hard for us to get our hands on it."
"If the police find anything incriminating..." Lexa starts.
Bellamy interrupts. "If the police find anything to incriminate the Azgeda, at best they'll ignore it, and at worst they'll delete it."
Lexa knows that he's right, the Azgeda is the most powerful gang in the City, they certainly seem to have a knack of getting away with things.
Bell continues. "And you know Lex if they do delete it..." he doesn't finish his sentence.
Lexa smiles at him. "Anya will be able to retrieve it."
"Exactly. So what do you think?" A hopeful look takes over his face.
"Well I think it's a lot better than plan A." She smirks. "But Bell if we go through the laptop and the phone any everything else, and we don't get any answers, are you going to be able to drop it?" She pins him with a stare which conveys that he better be.
He decides to be completely honest, he knows that the best way with Lexa. "I don't know. I guess we'll find out."
He shrugs, and Lexa guesses she will have to take it. She just prays that they get the answers they need.
XXXXXXXXXX
Clarke wandered out of her bathroom with a restored resolve, ready to face Lexa; to find that the beautiful brunette was nowhere to be found. She contemplated calling her, or texting her, but she decided against it. As a result, she's been unable to detach herself from her phone all day hoping to god that Lexa gets in touch.
Her day had become indescribably worse when both she and Raven had been called into school by the headmaster Theo Jaha, she assumes that it's obviously to do with Friday night given that both she and Raven have been called in, but she can't help but feel a little nervous at the thought that somehow, he knows about what happened last night between her and Lexa.
She and Raven are currently sitting at Mr Jaha's desk, she knows that Raven feels just as apprehensive as she does, there's something about Headmaster Jaha that scares them both a little. They are currently waiting for him to finish up with his phone call so he can reveal the reason they've been summoned.
Clarke swallows hard when he drops the receiver back into the holder, he looks up and gives the two of them a remorseful smile. The fact that he's smiling has to be a good sign right?
"How are you two ladies doing?"
Raven looks at Clarke. Jaha clearly picks up on this. "I have been briefed about what happened on Friday night, including the fact that you two were in attendance at the night club." He confesses.
A look of worry crosses both of the young teachers faces. Jaha has to stifle a laugh. "Relax guys. I just wanted to make sure that you're both okay."
Clarke breaks the silence first. "We're fine. I'm more worried about our students. They saw things that they should never have had to see; that no one should ever have to see."
Raven nods to show she agrees. Jaha frowns. "How did they seem to you on Friday?"
"Not great." Raven is probably a little shorter than she meant to be; but seriously how does he expect them to have been.
Clarke tries to rescue her friend a little. "It was an emotional night for them all. But they have a pretty great support system amongst themselves, so I'm sure they'll all come through it eventually."
Jaha nods. "We don't expect them to be back in school imminently, but given that it's their senior year, and we're not too far away from final exams, we could do with keeping the disruption to a minimum."
Clarke and Raven again just nod, Jaha continues. "How are you two doing? Are you okay to come back to work tomorrow." He quickly adds. "It's no problem, if you feel like you need a couple of days?"
"I'm fine to come back in tomorrow." Clarke confirms.
Raven quickly agrees. "I have no problem reporting for duty tomorrow."
"Good." He smiles, and address both of them. "You don't have to look so scared you know. There are no issues with you attending a nightclub on a Friday night ladies. The majority of the students there were 18; and if anyone has any questions about Finn Collins being 17, they can direct them to the nightclub that allowed him entry. Nothing to do with anyone else."
Clarke had been worried about this point to be honest, she thought that maybe they would be questioned about why they hadn't told Finn to leave as soon as they saw him in the club. She's pulled from her thoughts when Jaha speaks again.
"Is there anything else I need to know?"
Clarke takes a deep breath, she'd already decided to confess part of the story regarding her and Lexa. "Lexa Woods has slept on my couch the past two nights."
Ravens heads snaps up at such a rate of knots that Clarke is surprised that it's still attached to her neck. The look of surprise on her bosses face might have been funny had the circumstances not been so dire.
"Can I ask why?" Jaha's stare doesn't leave her.
"She didn't have anyone pick her up from the police station Friday night, and when I questioned her about it, she told me that her Mums an alcoholic, and her Dad isn't around. I didn't want to leave her by herself." She feels a little bad for revealing Lexa's secrets like this; but anything less than the truth, really wouldn't be an adequate explanation.
"That makes sense. You did the right thing." Jaha nods as he speaks.
"Thank you, sir." Clarke tries to hide the relief from her voice.
"If Woods needs you going forward, then don't hesitate to be there for her. Okay well I need to arrange a special assembly tomorrow to let the student body know what's going on. So I'll see you two ladies there."
Clarke and Raven take this as their cue to leave and head out into the hall. Raven pulls on Clarke's arm. "You and me; the pub. Now."
Clarke knows Raven is going to expect her to spill, and to be honest she feels like she needs to.
XXXXXXXXXX
Raven slinks into her seat opposite Clarke, as she places the bottle of wine she's just purchased onto the table, before handing her friend an empty glass. She eyes the blonde suspiciously, she has a feeling Lexa woods didn't just sleep on Clarke's couch. Clarke can almost feel Raven interrogating her through her stare. She's not sure how much more of this she can take; she just wants Raven to hurry up and get this over with.
Clarke pours herself a glass of wine and takes a large swig, all the while Ravens focus remains on her. She closes her eyes as she feels the alcohol burn down her throat. This has to have been one of the most emotional weekends she's ever lived through in her short 23 years. Friday night up there as probably the worse night of her life; Saturday night felt like best; but then Lexa's disappearing act this morning; she has been on a rollercoaster and to be honest she's in the mood to get shit faced. When she opens her eyes, it appears that Raven is ready to get this inquisition going.
"So Woods has slept at your place the last couple of nights?" There's no judgment in Ravens voice as she poses the question. Clarke just nods.
Raven nods clearly this is really difficult for her best friend, and she has a good idea why. "Clarke, I'm your best friend, and I love you no matter what. But this thing between you and Woods, I see how strong it is."
Clarke sighs. "She's my student Rae."
"Not really." Raven shrugs. "It's not like you actually teach her, well apart from social sciences." Raven corrects herself. "Which isn't a real subject anyway. And she graduates in like 10 weeks."
"It's a little late to be worrying about when she graduates Rae." Clarke offers her friend a sheepish grin.
Ravens face explodes into a shocked smile. "I knew it."
Clarke can't quite believe her friend is so excited about her bombshell. She expected a least a little berating. Raven apparently has no such thoughts. "Right spill, I want details."
She pours her own glass full of wine and eagerly awaits a full account of what exactly Clarke has been up to with her pupil.
"Raven I had sex with a student, I don't think you should be this enthusiastic."
Raven practically squeals. "Oh my god, you did sleep with her. I'm still waiting for those details."
Clarke shakes her head. "Raven I might be breaking the law." It's something that Clarke has really been stressing about, but she hasn't exactly had a chance to really check out the legality of her actions.
Her statement causes Raven to tut. "Really Clarke, you aren't breaking the law, she's 18. You are however breaking at least 3 of the schools Code of Conduct." She advises confidently.
Clarke looks confused. Raven explains. "I could tell you were smitten with Woods as soon as you laid eyes on her, so I checked it out. I promise you Clarke, you cannot end up in Jail, you could however end up jobless."
"And un-hireable. Nobody would hire a teacher that was fire for having relations with a student."
Raven giggles. "Having relations, who even says that Clarke. Look all you need to do is make sure that the school doesn't find out about this. Now what I need you to tell me is exactly what they aren't going to find out about." Raven wiggles her eyebrows.
Clarke laughs, Raven isn't going to let her get away with this. "Okay." Another deep breath. "So Friday night, or Saturday morning I guess, she really just did sleep on my couch."
Raven gives her a look as if she doesn't buy it, but she lets Clarke continue. "She showed up at my place again last night, and I set her up on my couch again. But in the middle of the night I guess she had a nightmare or something."
She looks up and can see that Raven is hanging on her every word, she continues. "So anyway I went downstairs to comfort her or whatever, and before I knew it..."
Raven who has actually leaned closer and closer into the table the more Clarke has spoken. "Before you knew it what?"
Raven is clearly getting impatient. "Before I knew it we were both naked and fucking each other against my living room wall." Clarke can't help the excitement she feels at the memory.
Raven swallows her mouth dry. "That's so hot."
Raven manages to get over the images that are floating around her brain, and gets her sensible head back on. "So if that was last night, how have things been between you today?"
"They haven't." Clarke confesses sadly.
"What do you mean?"
"I jumped in the shower first thing, and when I got out she'd gone." Clarke feels more than a little emotional at the memory.
Raven on the other hand is starting to panic. "She just up and left? Why?"
Clarke picks up on the change of tone in her best friend's voice. "I don't know. Why?"
Raven ignores her question. "And she hasn't called or text you or anything?"
"No I haven't heard from her all day." Clarke wants to know where Raven is going with this. "Rae what are you thinking?"
"Don't go mad." Raven takes a deep breath, she knows Clarke isn't going to like this. "Lexa is hot."
Clarke wonders why Raven is staying the obvious, but doesn't interrupt; her best friend continues. "She could have her pick of girls at school, hell she probably has." Clarke doesn't like that thought one bit.
"Seriously Rae, where is this going?"
"Look I'm just thinking I know what we were like at that age, notches on bedposts and all that."
"Speak for yourself."
Raven glares at her friend. "Look Clarke all I'm saying, is that bedding a teacher would have been the ultimate notch."
Clarke feels sick at thought. That can't be what this was for Lexa surely, it certainly didn't feel like that last night.
Raven has continued speaking without Clarke really noticing. "With her taking off like she did and no contact all day; I'm not saying that, that's definitely what it is, but Clarke your career is on the line here, you need to make sure that she's not bragging to her friends about you."
Clarke looks at her friend, knowing that ultimately, she's right; she needs to know where she stands for the sake of her career. But at the same time, her gut feeling is that last night meant as much to Lexa as it did to her, and if she confronts Lexa about it, and as she suspects, Lexa confirms she isn't just some trophy lay; she knows the younger woman will be pissed at her, for even asking the question. She decides that saving her career is probably more important than that chance of pissing Lexa off. She sighs again as she pulls her phone out.
"No time like the present I guess." She wafts her phone at Raven, before typing out a quick text to Lexa.
'Hey, I hope you're okay. Are you free? I need to talk to you? C x'
It's only a matter of seconds before a response comes through from Lexa.
'Sure, where do you want to talk? L x'
'My place in 15? C x'
'See you there. L x'
XXXXXXXXXX
Clarke walked home from the pub, it's only a couple of streets from her house. She smiles as she gets closer, and sees Lexa sitting on the concrete steps that lead up to her front door.
"Hey."
Lexa's head snaps up at the greeting, she has too been busy nervously wringing her hands to notice her teacher approach. She had been at Anya's when Clarke text, she assumes this will be the whole, 'we made a huge mistake speech.' And to be honest she could do without it. But she knows she could never say no to Clarke, so she made her excuses and here she is.
She's surprised to see Clarke smiling down at her. "Hi." She rises to her feet as she speaks.
Clarke moves past her, and starts to unlock her front door, she gestures at Lexa to follow her. They make their way into Clarke's kitchen in silence, and Clarke pours herself a glass of water. "Do you want a drink?"
"No thank you." Lexa answers politely as she makes herself comfortable in one of the stools at the kitchen island.
Clarke sighs, she realises that she needs to start this conversation given that she asked Lexa over, she's just not really sure how. It appears that Lexa may be getting a little impatient. "So Clarke, what do you want to talk about?"
"Last night." Lexa's heart sinks, she was right, she gazes down at the kitchen island, which has become the most interesting thing in the room. "Well actually this morning."
This confuses Lexa, her head snapping up to pin Clarke with an inquisitive look confirms as much. Clarke decides to be brave. "Why did you take off this morning?"
Lexa is even more confused, she was so sure that Clarke was going to put an end to whatever it is that's going on between them, but instead she seems kind of pissed off. Lexa also decides honesty is the best policy.
"I woke up just after you." She shrugs her shoulders. "I just guess after that almighty sigh, and you running off to the bathroom, you figured that last night was a huge mistake; and to be honest, I couldn't take hearing that this morning, so I left."
Clarke's heart breaks a little. She feels like she has to at least attempt to explain. "Lexa, you've got to understand how much I'm risking to be with you."
"I know that Clarke, I'm not stupid." Lexa is perhaps a little harsher than she meant to be.
"Hey, I know you're not stupid." She moves round the island so she's closer to Lexa, but doesn't actually reach out and touch her, which is honesty really all she wants to do. "I panic when I'm around you Lexa, it's like I have no control over anything I do."
Lexa smiles she knows that feeling. Clarke continues. "I'm drawn to you, but the fact is for the next 10 weeks you're my student, and if anyone found out about this, my career would be over. I've worked really hard to become a teacher Lexa."
"I know that Clarke, the last thing I want to do is jeopardise your career." Clarke can see the sincerity in the brunette's eyes.
Clarke sighs, she hates that she's about to do this, but following her conversation with Raven, she has to ask; it would be negligible towards her career for her not to ask, wouldn't it? Lexa picks up on Clarke's hesitation, she reaches out and places her hand on her teacher's arm. "Hey what is it?"
"What was last night to you?" The question practically falls out of her mouth, she's tried to get the question out there in the least offensive way possible.
But the question confuses Lexa. "What do you mean?"
Clarke doesn't really know how to phrase this so it comes out well, so instead she just blurts it out, and hopes that if Raven is way off the mark that Lexa forgives her.
"Am I just a notch on your bedpost or did last night actually mean something to you?"
Lexa's main emotion is pure shock. If she wasn't so insulted by the question, she might have actually laughed out loud. Clarke can tell the younger woman isn't impressed, but she can't stop herself from pressing further, she guesses its due to nerves, it's like verbal diarrhoea. "Because if you're going to brag about last night to your friends then I need to know about it, so I can prepare to try and salvage my career." Clarke stands arms crossed against her chest waiting for an answer, she's on the defensive now.
In fairness Lexa looks like she's about to go off like a rocket, Clarke knows that she's just made a terrible mistake, but it's out there now, so she can't take it back.
Lexa swallows the anger she feels. "Have you been drinking?" She struggles to get the question out through gritted teeth.
"I've had a glass of wine, what's that got to do with anything?" It's Clarke's turn to be confused.
"Well I was just wondering why the hell you would make me come here just so you could insult me; I figured you must be drunk." Lexa's jaw remains firm.
Clarke sighs. "I'm not drunk Lex. It's just with you disappearing like you did, and then I spoke to Raven and she put this idea in my head."
"Wait so you're allowed to speak to your friends about last night but I'm not allowed to talk to my friends about it." Lexa knows she's being childish now, but she's really mad.
"Come on Lexa, I have so much more to lose that you do."
Lexa knows she's right, so she decides to make this easy for Clarke. "Fine, then I'll take the risk away." She jumps off the stool and Clarke's heart sinks as Lexa finishes. "Maybe in ten weeks when you're precious career isn't such an issue we can talk."
Clarke rubs her temple, but pulls on Lexa's sleeve to stop her from running. "I'm not explaining myself very well."
She looks Lexa dead in the eyes. "I'm not saying you're not worth the risk Lexa, quite the opposite in fact. I'm just trying to find out if you're in this as much as I am. If last night was just a bit of fun for you, or god forbid, a trophy lay to brag to your friends about, then obviously we can't go any further. But if last night affected you as much as it did me, and you can promise me that for the next ten weeks we can keep this between me and you." She thinks it over. "And Raven." She chuckles and Lexa can't help the smile that forms on her own face.
"Then I'm willing to take the risk for you Lexa."
Clarke steadies herself, she has basically put herself right out there to one of her students, she's praying that Lexa feels the same, or else the next ten weeks at school could be interesting.
Lexa isn't sure she can speak; Clarke's little speech has rendered her completely emotional and speechless mainly due to the large lump that has formed in her throat. She leans forward, and taking Clarke by surprise, presses her lips against the gorgeous blondes and pulls her into a searing kiss, which she hopes conveys, that she is totally on board with Clarke's plan to essentially sneak around for the next ten weeks; she'll do anything, if it means she gets to be with Clarke.
Lexa pulls back. "I promise last night was real for me. The last thing I want is to ruin your career; and I swear I haven't told anyone about me and you."
Clarke sighs with relief. More at the fact that Lexa wants this. "Lexa I don't mind you speaking to your friends, as long as you can trust them with the information. It would be pretty hypocritical of me to say you can't tell them, when I've already spoken to Raven."
"Look I'm not really interested in my friends knowing, they've kind of got a lot on their plate right now." Lexa shrugs.
Not for the first time Clarke's heart sinks. How selfish has she been, she didn't even give Lexa's current circumstances a second thought. "God Lexa I'm so sorry." Clarke can feel her own shoulders sag. "You're going through a lot right now, the last thing you need to be worrying about is me."
Lexa pulls Clarke closer. "Hey, I don't worry about you. When I'm with you, it's like I'm at peace, like I know I can get through this shit-storm. You are the only thing keeping me sane right now."
Clarke smiles, she consumed by a feeling of tiredness. She glances at the clock on the kitchen wall and sees that it's close to eleven.
"Stay with me tonight?"
Lexa grins. "On the couch?" She jokes.
Clarke slaps her arm. "I think we're a little past that."
She grabs Lexa's hand and pulls her through her living room and upstairs to bed. Ten weeks, that all they have to get through. Ten measly weeks.
XXXXXXXXXX
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