Sorry that it took so long to summit a new chapter. Christmas time was a busy time around my place. And then afterward my husband and I have been dealing with a miscarriage. It's made it hard to get inspired to write. I used some lines from Catching Fire.

It had been 2 weeks since Peeta since had witnessed the kiss between Gale & Katniss in the meadow. The kiss that had finally broken his spirit. He hadn't done any baking for the people in the Seam, or for his neighbours in Victors Village. He hadn't even left his home, or open any of his curtains to look outside. He had shut himself off from the whole world. If he couldn't see outside, then he wouldn't have to see Katniss & Gale together, in each other arms or kissing. Even if meant that he had be careful making sure that he didn't run out of food before the Victory Tour.

Every time he thought of Gale & Katniss together, it broke his heart. Once he survived the Hunger Games, and he was healing in the Capital, he dreamed of what his life would be like with Katniss. Only to find out that it was all a lie, that he was made a fool of, in front of all his friends, & family. Now it was only a few weeks until the Victory Tour, where he would have to put on a fake smile, pretend for everyone. If that wasn't bad enough, every Hunger Games he would have to pretend for the Capital, pretend that they were the Star Crossed Lovers.

He took a deep breath, and stared at his arm. He traced his fresh cut, with his index finger. Even though he had promised himself that he wouldn't do it again, it had been the only way he could release the pain when he was feeling really down, when he allowed the voices in his head to get the best of him. He had become weak.

Right on time there was a knock on the door. Every afternoon someone came by the house, knocking on the front door. He never looked out to see it was, never once answering it. He had hoped that they would get the point after a few days of ignoring it, but they hadn't. They would still coming by ever day. Whoever it was seemed to be the only one that cared that he hadn't been out of his home. They were the only one who came to see how he was doing. But he didn't dare open the door, he didn't want to be disappointed if it wasn't the person he longed to see. If it wasn't Katniss.

Go away, he kept chanting in his head. Today they seem to be much more persistent. Please, he cried to himself. He just wanted to be left alone. He wasn't into being the old Peeta who was friendly, kind, happy all the time. The guy who believed there was still good in the world, and seen things in Rose colour glasses. It was too tiring being him all the time. Being him got him nothing. His mother hated him, Katniss wanted nothing to do with him, and his dad & brother seemed to not care either, not coming to see why he hadn't been to work in weeks.

He curled up in a ball on the living room couch. It isn't fair, he said to himself. He went through the Hunger Games and he lost everyone, and yet Katniss went through it too, and she still has everyone surrounding her with love. What had he done to make everyone desert him, to make everyone stay away from him. Had he become that unloveable? He was beginning to believe everything his mother had always told him.

He continue to cry until he fell asleep on the couch.

Prim stood on the other side of Peeta's door, knocking on his door. Hoping today would be the day that he finally opened the door. She was worried about him. She hadn't seen him in 2 weeks, the curtains have been closed & he hadn't even dropped off any bread. What had happened to make him lock himself into the house? Had his mom said something? She knew she was young, but she was aware of the things, that his mom had done and said to him over the years. She had heard all the rumours.

She tried the door knob, but there was no luck, it was locked. She took a deep breath, and frown. Why was't his dad here checking up on him? Or his brothers? Didn't they care that he hadn't been by the bakery? Weren't they worried like she was? He knew that things had to be hard on him since the games. Since her sister had rejected him. She knew that Katniss had been still struggling, especially at night, but she had tried hiding it from her and their mom. But at least Katniss had her, her mom & Gale. Who did Peeta? It must be so lonely in such a big house, when you didn't have anyone else to share it with. To help him through the dark nights.

She slowly walked back towards her house, she looked back one more time, for a sign of life in his home, but there was nothing. Her heart went to him. Of all people, he didn't deserve this. He had been nothing but wonderful to their family since he got home. He deserved so much better.

When she walked through the door, she passes by Katniss, who had just come down the stairs. She didn't even say anything, she just walked by her, and sat down at the table to start her homework. She tried concentrate on her work, she kept thinking of a way to get to Peeta. Over the last little while they had become close. He was the brother she never had. She felt like she could relate to him a lot more then she could ever with Gale.

Prim was so lost in her thought, that she didn't see Katniss walk in, and sit down. "Hey Little Duck, what's on your mind?"

"It's Peeta," not looking her sister in the face.

"What about Peeta?"

"He hasn't left his home in 2 weeks."

"How can you be so sure of that? Are you sure he hasn't come out while your at school?" She knew that her sister wasn't likely to notice since she always left so early in the morning to hunt, and then spent most of the day in the Seam.

"Mom says she hasn't seen him. Plus his curtains have been closed, and he hasn't even brought anyone bread since then. I'm worried about him, he won't even answer his door."

"Really!" Prim could see the concern on his face. She knew her sister wouldn't admit it, but she cared for Peeta. After what they went through together, there was no way she didn't. Plus she knew he sister wasn't good at acting, she saw how she was in the cave with him, she saw something there. She was just too scared to let herself feel anything.

"Rory came to me 2 weeks ago, at school, and mentioned at lunch that he saw an upset Peeta running towards Victor's Village. So the next day when I still hadn't seen him, I went to check on him. I knocked on his door, but got no answer. I thought that maybe he was at the bakery, so every day I've gone by, and still no answer."

"Prim he's a grown boy, he can take care of himself."

"Katniss, he's all alone. He's got no family, no one that seems to care of him. He needs us!" she begged her sister.

"I…." Katniss began, before rushing off, upstairs.

Katniss walked upstairs, and down the hall to her room. She closed behind her, went over to the window, and sat down on the windowsill. She stared at the house across from her, at Peeta's home. Had she been that blind not to realized that he had locked himself in his home. She had been spending so much time trying to hide away from anything that had to do with Capital, that she didn't realize how things had gone downhill with him. She began to feel guilty. She had pushed him away, she had avoided him because she thought any feelings she was feeling was fabricated by the Capital. And she refused to allow the Capital rule her life, allow them to win.

She was so wrapped up in her own feelings that she didn't care on how he was feeling. How her actions were affecting him.

She began to wonder what was going on with her boy with the bread? What happened to have him lock himself away? Had it been his horrible mother, had she hurt him? Her heart dropped just thinking that Mrs Mellark could be hurt her son again. She wanted to go over there, and demand to know what was happening, but she had been nothing but horrible to him. She had lied to him so many times. She didn't deserve any answers.

As she continued to stare across the way, the snow began to come down slowly. It was first snow fall of the season. She wondered was Peeta watching this too. Did he realize that winter was finally here?

2 weeks had come quick, and tonight they would be heading off on the Victory Tour. Peeta had spent the last few days making sure that his house & he was ready for when people from the Capital arrived. He didn't want them to know something was wrong, he needed to trick them, make everyone believe everything is alright.

He went over to his window, and opened his curtains. He had to turn away a bit, since it was the first time he had seen day light in 4 weeks. It took a few moments for his eyes to adjust to the light.

"Peeta, you can do this," he told himself. He just needed to put on a smile, and be the guy that the Capital fell in love with. He was interrupted from his thought when the doorbell rang.

He walked down the stairs towards the door, "It's show time." He puts on smile, "Hey Portia."

"Oh Peeta, it's been too long," she sad before bringing him into a hug. "Now let me take a look at you."

As she's looking him up and down, it's making him feel uncomfortable, afraid that she will see through him, but he tells himself that he can't let it show. "Oh Peeta, we've got a lot of work to do."

"How's the lovely Ms. Everdeen?"

"She's well. She's loving the fact that she can spoil her sister Prim now."

"Oh that's her sister she volunteered for?" she asked.

"Yes. She's is really quite the sweetest girl," he smiled, thinking of the time he's spent with her. She had become his little sister. "I've been showing her how to bake."

"She must just love that. What kid doesn't have a sweet tooth!"

He knew how true that statement was. What she didn't understand was that most kids in District 12 didn't have the pleasure to enjoy most of those things. Thats why he taken it upon himself to bake bread, and goodies for people in the Seam.

After they scrubbed Peeta down, and made sure he was presentable for the show. Portia was helping him with his outfit for the evening, helping place on his grey button up shirt. When he brought is arm back to put his arm into the shirt, that's when she notice them, "Peeta, what are these scars on your arms?" she says as she traces her finger along his scars. "There are so many of them."

Peeta was caught of guard, he didn't think that she was paying any attention to his arms. "Um, I kind of burnt them at the bakery. I'ver been very clumsy, I'm still trying to get use to my leg," he lied. He just prayed that she would buy his story. It was true that he had tripped a bit the bakery when he first got home, but never did he burn himself because of it.

"Oh well I don't have anything here, maybe when we get to the Capital we can get that fixed up." Of course that was the solution to the Capital people. You can't show any scars, you have to look perfect. Though it may help so that he could hide from Haymitch & Katniss, then he wouldn't have to explain them to them.

"Okay."

The film crew comes over and tell us the type of shot they want to get. "When I say action, I want you to run over to Katniss, as if you haven't seen her in a while, and show Panem how much you both have missed one another."

"Okay," Peeta replied. If they only knew how true that story really was, he thought. If the Capital knew that it was all fake they would be in real trouble. He's not sure what Snow would do.

"And don't for get to smile, Katniss," Effie shouted out.

"Action!" the director shouted.

Peeta ran down the stairs, through the snow, towards Katniss, with a big smile on his face. He wasn't even sure if the smile he had plaster on his face was fake, or if it was real. Since from the moment he saw her, he's reminded of how much he really has missed her. But then he's reminded up the pain that she's cause him, and he's left unsure of what to think of his feelings.

As he approached her, he grabbed her around her waist, and spun her around. He's not sure if it's because its slippery out, or if it's his leg, but they lose their foot, and she falls on top of him. She doesn't move to get up right away, instead she stares down at him, and it feels like she's looking into his soul. She then leans down, and kisses him. It begins to feel like the kiss in the cave, with so much passion.

They get up, off the ground. Wiping off the snow from their clothing.

They hear Caesar Flickerman talking to them, "How's it going?"

"We're good," Peeta smiles, putting his arm around Katniss.

"That's it? That's all we have? We're good. So tactful all of a sudden. Peeta, give me some details."

"Things are…" unsure how to answer him. He had never had such a hard time trying to talk with someone, and find the right words to say. "things are great here in 12."

"Thanks to the generosity of the Capital we've never been closer," Katniss said. Peeta glanced over to Katniss, and wanted to laugh at her statement. It was such a lie. You can't get close when you won't even talk to the other, when you avoid the other.

"Well we'll be checking on Peeta & Katniss through out the Victory Tour."

"Wonderful! Everyone we will be out of here in 10 minutes," Effie says.

Peeta leaned over to Katniss, whispering, "Nice acting."

"You too," he swears he hears a sad tone, but he shakes it off as nothing.

"Almost thought that kiss was real," he says in more of a resentful voice. He almost believed it, but he wouldn't allow himself to be swept into the lies of the Star Cross Lovers. He wouldn't let himself believe those lies again.

Katniss walked in front of him, as if she was avoiding having to chat with him any further then she already had to. This was going to be a long tour if this how it was going to be.

Effie turns around to face us, "Come along children, we're on a schedule."

They follow Effie into the train. He looked around, it seemed like nothing had changed since the last time they were on the train. Effie continue to talk, "We have fabulous food, fabulous wine, massages, spa treatments. I told them nothing but the best for my two victors. It just needs to be just…."

Haymitch interrupts her in a mocking tone, "Fabulous?"

But Effie being Effie ignores it, "Exactly. Now the schedule is a bit bear—"

Peeta didn't even wait to let her finish before he takes off towards his room. He had enough of the pretending for one day. He couldn't take it any longer, especially since Katniss chose to kiss him on Camera.

"Peeta…" Katniss called after him, but he ignored her, and continue to walk down the hall towards his room.

He shuts his door behind him, and locks it. He slumps down on his bed. Tears ran down his face. Katniss had looked so nice today, and felt nice to have her look at him that way again. It just hurt knowing that it was all for the camera, for the Capital. If he was having a hard time just on the first day, then how was he going to do this for the rest of his life.

He laid down, and let the tears roll down his face.