7.

.oOo.

~ Snow White-Flag and the Seven Courses ~

.oOo.

Once upon a time, there was a mighty kingdom that was built in the land known today as Germany. This kingdom took the utmost pride in its military, and so any weakness in the people of the land was generally prohibited. The citizens were trained intensively, yes, but sometimes there were chinks in the armour, so to speak; it was for this reason that the king made sure to perform regular check-ups on the strength of the civilians, in order to weed out the weak and thus ensure the kingdom was at its strongest.

One day, while performing one of these routine check-ups, the king gazed upon his enchanted mirror.

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall," he said, "who in this land has the faintest heart of all?"

At these words, the reflection in the mirror began to swirl until the image depicted a boy with blue clothing and caramel hair (the king squinted harder, unable to tell whether the strange curl that seemed to protrude from the side of the boy's head was indeed real or an effect of the image's distortion). The lad was sat on the ground in the middle of the woods, crafting something with some twigs and white fabric.

"Flag as white as snow, tears as blue as rain,

Snow White-Flag is the one whose heart is most faint," the mirror responded.

Upon hearing this, the king summoned his best knight, a young man named Ludwig, and promptly instructed him to find and get rid of this Snow White-Flag.

"Yes, sir," Ludwig responded, before setting out into the woods in search of Snow White-Flag.

When Ludwig found the boy, he took out his hunting knife and was about to silently approach Snow White-Flag when the lad suddenly turned around, having detected the glint of the blade out of the corner of his eye.

Before Ludwig could react, Snow White-Flag had let out a piercing shriek and had proceeded to wave a large white flag frantically while sobbing, blubbering incoherently as he repeatedly begged for mercy.

Though Ludwig had known the boy had the faintest heart in the land, this level of weakness certainly took him by surprise. Furthermore, the lad's loud wails were now raising concern, as it was quite possible that passers-by would hear them and investigate the source of the noise. Observing their surroundings, Ludwig took notice of a small cottage that appeared to be uninhabited, and he decided that he would coax the boy into the cottage for the time being while he decided just what to do with him.

"Silence," Ludwig commanded Snow White-Flag, while putting his hunting knife away. "I won't kill you, okay? Now, come into this cottage with me so that we can talk."

Snow White-Flag's cries subsided as the lad let out a sniffle.

"Do you promise you won't kill me?" he said.

"I promise," Ludwig replied, making sure the boy couldn't see the two fingers crossed behind his back. "Come on now. I haven't got all day."

The two entered the cottage. While Snow White-Flag immediately began to explore the cottage's small kitchen, Ludwig took a seat and began to debate whether he should attempt to kill the boy after all or take pity on him and let him escape. These thoughts, however, were interrupted when a sudden cry of delight sounded from the kitchen.

"Look," Snow White-Flag said happily, having opened the door to the cottage's fridge. "This has all of the ingredients I need to make a proper seven-course Italian meal!"

"Seven-course Italian meal?" Ludwig inquired, raising an eyebrow. "This is hardly the time for-"

"Yes!" Snow White-Flag said. "Wine, bread, pasta, pizza, second pasta, second pizza, and dessert! Seven courses, see?"

Before Ludwig could object, the lad began pulling numerous ingredients out of the fridge and brought out multiple pots and pans for cooking, all the while humming happily to himself. Ludwig sighed, giving into the boy's whims. He supposed he was starting to feel a bit hungry, after all.

After the meal had been prepared, Ludwig took one bite and was admittedly shocked, as this food was far superior to the food the royal cook at the time had been producing. This, of course, was also partly because the royal cook was French, and virtually anything was better than the poison the Frenchman produced, but that was no matter. Ludwig also admitted that Snow White-Flag's food, though delicious, still couldn't compare to a hearty British meal, but that was no matter either.

In the end, Ludwig decided not to kill the boy after all, but instead brought him to the royal palace to serve as the new royal cook. After all, Ludwig had been wanting to get rid of the Frenchman for quite some time as everybody around him loathed the slimy little git, and this served as a perfect opportunity to do so.

And they lived happily ever after, now that the Frenchman had been removed from the premises once and for all.

The End.