Chapter 4 An Explanation

Rain was silently drumming to Hiromu's window and it surely did not help lessen the uneasiness of his mood. He was the usual philosophical guy, challenging himself with premises and answering himself with assumptions. Deep inside he knew, that not everything in this world can be explained by mere Aristotelian logic, especially on the matters of losing his straightforwardness.

He had never lost honesty nor resolve in front of Youko. How could he, the best as he was fondly called, stutter and lie at Youko Usami? Perhaps it was too sudden that a certain someone was entering Youko's personal life, befriending her, becoming too close to her…

…and someday that someone will be the one who'll sweep her off her feet. The sudden friendly date between Jinno and Youko two days prior was still fresh in his mind. He replayed those moments he did nonsensical things— such as appreciating Youko's un-lady like behavior and feeling a growing tinge of pain whenever she's laughing at someone other than himself.

Realization hit him hard. He was jealous!

But foolish as he is to love, he pondered more on how he would be able to get his straightforwardness back, especially that such absence was only intended to her.

He sighed deeply and motioned to the door.

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"It takes a lot of self confidence to gain one's straightforwardness, Hiromu."

Hmm, self confidence? That seems unproblematic to him. In fact he's oozing one, unconsciously.

"and perhaps trust…but wait again, you said you only felt this around Youko?"

Hiromu slowly nodded without leaving his penetrating gaze at Ryuji.

"Youko? Why her?" Ryuji said in disbelief.

"and why not?" said a familiar booming voice that just entered the kitchen. Youko Usami had her hands on her hips and her icy stare locked at her brother. She failed to notice the other fidgeting in his seat.

"Did you hear everything?" Ryuji asked suddenly, his eyes darting from the confident girl to the guy who was getting uncomfortable from his position.

Youko shrugged. "I don't have large ears like Usada, Ryu-san." She glanced a bit at Hiromu, asked herself, why is he avoiding my stare? and hurried to collection of sweets at the pantry. Picking a sweet from the pantry seemed like ages. Hiromu almost wanted to hit Ryuji in the head for making faces at him.

"Ne, Hiromu—I think you lost something."

Hiromu wondered as to how Youko was quick to shift from the pantry to the side of the nook where he and Ryuji were sitting. His eyes rounding like golf balls, he asked himself if it was her citrus perfume that's making him hard to breathe or that her face was too close. While she was studying him carefully, he felt uneasy by the scent of her hair and skin, and the warmth coming from her nostrils. He felt his cheeks turning to crimson red.

Therefore she concluded, "Ha! You don't have wax on your hair today, ne?" She took a bit from her bun and headed playfully to the exit.

When the poor boy finally caught air, Ryuji gave a long sigh.

"What happened exactly at the overseas Hiromu?" he asked.

Ryuji was definitely talking about THAT day.

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Hiromu's POV (the day he rejected her love)

Youko would be surprising me today with her visit, but little did she know that I got a surprise to her myself. Her birthday is today, and this will be her first time to celebrate it outside Japan. Nick and I thought of holding a little celebration at a rooftop of a small apartment to which EMC lent me. While finishing the details of the lemon meringue cake, Nick told me that I have to mind my own time for she'll be arriving at my school in less than an hour.

I haven't seen Youko in more than a year and I guess I am excited to reunite with an old buddy who fought with me alongside Ryuji against Vaglass. Sure there are few Japanese at the university, but nothing beats being with a person you've considered family.

There she was, hurrying to me with a big smile on her face. She was wearing a yellow cardigan and blue scarf over her white dress. Her hair was unusually let down and it swayed with her while she moved. Her face matured a little, her body got slimmer, but nevertheless she's the same old. I stood from the bench, ready to extend my hand for her to shake, but instead she surprisingly embraced me with a tight hug. She smelled citrus and mint mixed together. As much as I hate to admit it, the closest contact I had with women were hugs with my mother and sister. For someone not blood related, Youko's my first. She must have felt tension in my muscles for her unusual gesture so she let go, but her big smile never left her face.

I took her small suitcase and led her to the car. I would usually ride on my bike but I never let any girl aside my sister ride with me on Nick.

When we arrived at the apartment, I escorted her to her room while Nick finished the remaining preparations at the rooftop. She sat on the bed while I positioned myself with my arms crossed at the door way.

"Is it hard to study and live in a place far away from home?" She asked, her eyes moving from me to the decorations that Nick made to her temporary room.

"I've researched before I moved here. So it was never hard to adjust" I answered plainly.

"Ha! Same old Hiromu. Still kakkoi (cool)."

She began reminiscing those ups and downs of our battles with Vaglass. I couldn't help but to miss those old days. Sure, she and I bickered a lot, for I always forget that she's an adult. But I guess that's our normal way of communicating. If we didn't bicker, that's not Hiromu and Youko at all.

My morphin brace rang, thus the signal from Nick that the rooftop's ready for our small celebration.

…I wouldn't forget how happy and surprised she was.

Her hands moved to appreciate the small cupcakes and sandwiches decorated with Usada flags. I would have to admit that Nick really knows what a girl wants in general. As my buddyroid entertained her, I used my super human speed to get the lemon meringue waiting at the small fridge and dropped it gently in front of her.

"Happy birthday Youko" I said, while counting mentally the candles on her cake.

"Make a wish Youko!" Nick chimed in.

Youko closed her eyes for few seconds and blew the 18 candles.

Moments later, she and I were looking for a convenience store. The night was young and I thought it would be nice to tour her to places where I would usually go for my errands and leisure. I brought her to my favorite place in the city—the park. Coming from the country side counts me among the few who loved nature and contemplation.

She sat on the grass while admiring the ducks from a pond in front of us. I soon followed. I could see her relax while a jazz band plays few meters from us. What caught our eye was a man in his 30s, kneeling in one knee in front of a woman whose eyes were filled with tears. He was proposing to her. When the woman said "yes," Youko tried to cover her face from giggling.

"Do you know that Jin-san almost proposed to your mother?" Her face contorting, I told her that some of the prized possessions that the inventor left was a box with a ring inside.

"Ryu-san never told me," she said with a shrug, "but I guess that explains why he glows whenever he talks about her"

Silence followed soon after. And then she spoke again with hint of amuse,

"Nick told me that you have a lot of admirers."

"…"

"Ne Hiromu, what if I told you that I admire you too?"

Her words made my throat really dry. But to her my face was expressionless.

"Admiration," I began firmly, "is a kind of respect. So I guess it's okay."

"I see" She said while looking down and intertwining her fingers together.

We were silent for a while. It took us five minutes before I broke the tension and stood up.

"Let's go and look around" I said while turning my back at her. I walked a few steps with her trailing behind me. She was unusually silent and I could feel her muttering gibberish to herself.

"Youko, why—"

"What if I told you…that…I love…you" She said almost in a whispering tone. Though it was barely audible, I heard the words clearly and loud enough for me to face her with my mouth parting but no words coming out. I felt nervous and weak.

And then I laughed. It was a mocking laugh.

"Like your love for Ryu-san?" I asked.

I knew she was about to say "no" in defense, but I preempted her.

"Let's go Youko" I said, dismissing her abruptly.

I didn't say the words that'll hurt her. But knowing her sensitivity to these kind of things, I think she got my point not to discuss the matter anymore. She forced a smile and walked before me.

If the confession was part of her surprise to me then I think the objective was achieved.

But what surprised me more is when she tagged me to the convenience store and reasoned that she's already legal to buy alcoholic drinks. Telling me that it'll be her first time to consume such, she asked if I and Nick could accompany her to this transition. I accepted the offer reluctantly and the night went through as if nothing awkward had happened.

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Being Youko's older brother, Hiromu thought that Ryuji would be turning to blue buster anytime soon. In his thinking position, Ryuji began to speak (to Hiromu's surprise, no war was asked), "I think she has moved on from the incident."

Trusting that Ryuji knew Youko's feelings better, Hiromu gave a slow nod.

"But that's for me to find out" he assumed, without giving in to his conclusions.

Hiromu looked as if he got his resolve back. He'll be investigating to his own inquiry himself.

What the two didn't notice was a pair of ears listening from the hallway.

Nakamura-san giggled and dialed the necessary digits from her mobile phone.