Hello everybody, hope you like it!
xoxo Leviosa
Chapter 20
"It's enough, It's enough. I can't do this any longer. I am not able to survive, if I have to see everything. You know, maybe there are things that should stay secret", Queenie told her, both sitting on Tinas bed, in the room that Nicholas Flamel gave them. They had not known where to stay, and he and Dumbledore wanted to plot with them, and he had a free room, so that was the best opportunity they would get. "Queenie, I know you sometimes don't see your ability as a gift... But you are a gift. You are the nicest person I know, and you are there for everybody. It's totally okay to feel low sometimes, we are all human. And even though it hurts, even though it's too much for you sometimes, you can tell me. There will be times when you have to be strong, strong in the soul, and you can count on me. Whenever you need me, I won't let it destroy you, I can save you from the voices in your head. I won't let you down", Tina said, holding the hand of her sister. "Hey, Tini, you're my sister and not my personal assistant", Queenie smiled at her, but Tina knew that she wanted nothing more than to cry right now. "Tell me what you saw. You can survive it, you can survive it by telling me", Tina looked in the eyes of her sister. Queenies normally so beautiful face was red from all the tears she had cried and her hair was messier than ever. Still, she was her sister. " Are you sure that you want to hear?", she looked up and Tina nodded heavily, "I saw... A girl, about fourteen. Blond hair, dress, reminded me of myself. And there was Dumbledore and I suppose the girl was his sister? There was also his brother, and next to him", she wiped the tears out of her face, "stood Grindelwald. Grindelwald, Tini. They dueled and then this girl came and said, just like I did, Stop. As if it could change something. But someone casted the killing spell, and it killed her. She was an obscurial, just like Credence. The three didn't want to kill her, but they did. And then Grindelwald disapparated. And Dumbledore...", she was silent. "I can't. I can't tell you, it's too much" "You don't have to, Queenie" "Thanks for being there for me", Queenie whispered, with tears in her eyes. "I'll always be."
"Isn't it quite useless?", Credence asked him. "What?" "Feeding these creatures. Couldn't they survive without your help?" Newt did not know how he had gotten here, but he was there and fed his occamies, and he could use all the help he could use. "Umm... I suppose they could. They are all a bit out of control, that's why they are here. I help them, and they give me something back, their appreciation. It's not like I possess them, they are my friends, and I am their friend. It's — umm — more as if we were a big family. We all have our problems, but together we can handle them", he said, while he petted Jacobs occamy. These big eyes seemed to smile at him, and at Credence as he carefully put his hand on his feathers. "A family?" It was strange to see him without Malena at his side. He was her shadow and she was his. There were like twins: they did not go anywhere alone. So why had he left her? But Credence face lighted up, as the occamy looked up to him, happily. Newt wasn't ready to destroy that, as he slowly realized that Credence had the same smile as Leta. It was like the sun, the brightest thing in the room. He should use it more often. "Would you mind if I care for your creatures more often?", he said, smiling. "Not really. Most people don't even realize that they aren't beasts, because beasts and creatures are quite similar. This is why I had to call my book fantastic beasts, my publisher didn't want me to call it creatures, the marketing capabilities wouldn't be that good if I changed it. But there are a few things that are different between them, and what makes them different is more important than any similarities", Newt began to say. He waited a bit, waited for Credence to run away. Most people began to sleep when he reached this part of his talk. Still, Credence seemed interested, but he couldn't be sure. He was still the troubled teenager, he still had an obscurus inside him, and he was afraid. There were two things Newt Scamander hated above all: intolerance and humans. Humans were the cruelest of all animals, they didn't think, they didn't care, they hurt others without reason. And Newt had learned that pitying people didn't lead to anything good, from Leta, but he couldn't do anything but to want Credence to forget everything that the world had done to him. "I have got an idea. Beasts are dangerous, they kill without any reason and kill whenever they have the opportunity to. Creatures are potentially dangerous, but can be tamed. They only kill if necessary, or if they are attacked. Am I right?", Credence looked up from the moon calbs, which he was feeding. "Totally right. You must have the love for creatures from your sister", Newt whispered. He did not understand the look on Credence face. As he noticed that Newt was looking at him, he quickly looked away. The same shy guy he had always been, but somehow a little stronger. "Leta did not save me. She could not stop my... I guess he really is... my father, from leaving me on the stairs of a witch hater. And I know, his opinion is, that it is better to die or be tortured than living without magic... Because a seer came to my father and told him, my mother died as I was born, told him...", Credence stared at the moon calbs and tried not to look at Newt. He knew the story of Letas brother, Leta stayed with him and his brother, every Christmas. She couldn't sleep, never, so she woke up Newt and talked with him. She missed her brother, thought of him every night, didn't want to live with her father anymore. Why couldn't her mother take her to uncle in Paris? She was scared that Corvus was dead, she would never forgive herself if he was dad. Newt had no problem with listening to her, comforting her, when she couldn't hold the tears back. "The seer told him that you would not be a wizard. But you became an obscurial, because of the cruelty of your father, and if he didn't listen to the prophecy, you would be a wizard now", Newt completed his sentence. "Anyway, Leta did not save me. She wasn't there when I needed her, she was never. She left me alone, she didn't even look after me. I never wanted a family, Newt, I just wanted someone who is there for me. And she wasn't. Maybe this was the reason why I thought of the obscurus inside as a beast. I thought that there was no other choice. I had to destroy, I had to kill, because I didn't know how to control it. I had to kill because I lived without the only person that ever had been nice to me: it wasn't the loss of my father and only partly my foster mother that made me suppress my magic. It was living without my sister. Leta couldn't save me, but now she's here and I wanted to tell you: she loved you as much as she loved me. You're her second brother, and now that you are part of the family, I believe, I should try to understand you as much as you understand me" This time, Credence did not look away, he looked directly into Newts eyes, smiling. Newt was proud to have him as a friend.
"What's your name?" "I don't have a name" "Everybody's got a name. How do your parents call you?" "I'm an orphan, my parents died years ago and left me here" "How do you call yourself? What do you say when you are asked what's your name?" "I told you that I don't have a name", she didn't want to talk to this stranger for any longer. He just came and saw her sitting on the streets, begging for money. "Why don't you apply for a job? Try to go to school what so ever?", he asked her. "I know more than most people in my age and I also read more. You know what, maybe I should just go somewhere else. It's not your business what my name is nor who I am or what is happening to me. You're just a stranger, and also: you did not tell me your name either", She hated to be looked upon by others, so she stood up. Even though the man in front of her was still a lot taller than her. "My name's Skender. And I am here to help you" "You can't help me" "Of course I can, it is my job to help helpless young women like you are" "So you want to help me only because of my gender? And because you believe I am helpless? I frankly think that this isn't fair and that both statements are false. I can do whatever want, and I am probably stronger than most men on these streets and can definitely kill others better. If you aren't careful, you could become a victim of mine. You know, sometimes I lose my patience and the people in front of me are dead and notice it too late", she said, now angry. She could live her life perfectly, she didn't need anyone to help her. She would die with and without Skenders help. There was no way to cure her diesease, and she had accepted it. "It's true what they say: there really is a maledictus on the streets of Paris.", Skender stated. "A what?" "A maledictus. A person..." "A person that is possessed by a blood curse that will eventually lead to them transforming into an animal and unwillingly stay in their animal form. I know the definition of Maledictus, but why do you?", she said, because she was curious what he would answer. No one should know these words. There were some words in the wizarding world that only professors and victims of these curses should know. It was dangerous to know too much, she knew better than everyone. "Careful!", Skender screamed, and pushed her a side, a car almost crashed against them. She should have focused more on the streets than on to this unknown person. "You saved my life, I suppose? Don't believe I am thankful for that. Dying is better than being unable to speak and having to attack anyone around you.", she whispered, bitterly. Skender looked at the sky for a second and rolled his eyes at her. "This is why you should come in my circus. You are suicidal. And believe me, everything is better than death. I'll show you how to control yourself", he promised. She looked at him, he had saved her life, even though he knew her since about two minutes, he didn't hesitate to tell her that her life was worth the torture, the pain. And even though she wasn't sure why, she believed him. There was no cure, there was just control. Also, she had always wanted to work in a circus. A thought ran through her brain. "I want to be the enchanting snake girl. That's a good circus name, isn't it?" A second chance and it would probably change nothing, but just as Skender said, everything was better than death.
"Barebone, Modesty" Nothing. "Barebone, Modesty?!", it said louder. And on the floor, sitting next to Eulalie Hicks chair, was she. Eulalie had accepted her and now told, when asked, that she had adopted Modesty. No one knew that Modesty just had been there, that Eulalie firstly didn't want to adopt her. Lally had no time for a child, she was a young teacher and busy teaching. And still she liked Modesty even though Modesty had barely given Eulalie a choice, she got used to having an emphatic child around her. Luckily, Modesty had stopped singing the witch hunting song, because Lally thought that it was quite impolite to sing it in front of the other students. Modesty just came to Ilvermorny, because her intuition had told her to come here, because she wanted to live somewhere, where she did not have to fear for her life. She had heard a lot on the streets, she noticed wizards, even though others didn't. And even though she never wanted to study there, even though she never really considered a magical life, Ilvermorny accepted her.
It was the only reason why she and Eulalie ever argued. "But I don't have any magical abilities" "You're here now. You wouldn't be, if you didn't want to be a witch" "I wanted to be. But that was just a childish dream... I never thought I would have to study... Can't I just be your helper, I don't want to be the worst in the classes. I can't do anything what others can" "Modesty, first of all: dreams aren't childish. If you'd know the history of Ilvermorny, you would also know that dreams are what it is made of. If you believe in yourself, anything can come true. Our founder ran away from her stepmother, just like you did, and built something completely new, after the image of her biggest dream: she wanted to study at a wizarding school, and because her stepmother didn't let her go, she built her own. So don't tell me that you can't study just because you can't use a wand. You can see into peoples psyches, you understand rather than that you create. The magic is inside you and even though you don't share it with other people and even though you don't draw it out of yourself to make something work, you use it to learn something about the world around you. You are quite special, Modesty, and I won't allow you to suppress your magic like your former adopted brother did", Eulalie looked at her stiffly, and as always she made it clear that she wouldn't accept a no.