Oof! The air is forcibly pushed out of my chest as a heavy weight bounces on top of me. A pair of legs straddles my hips as two hands, roughly the size of my own, land atop my chest.
"Rise and shine, sleepyhead!" Alice's voice sings out to me. Her hands grip my shoulders, shaking them and bouncing us on my full size mattress. Swatting uselessly at her hands, I twist and turn unsuccessfully trying to shove her off of me.
"Get out of bed!" she practically yells in my ear. Opening one blurry eye, I check the clock on the nightstand: nine twenty-six. With a long groan, I cover my face with the pillow. I feel like I've just fallen asleep an hour ago. I tossed and turned most of the night before, barely getting any rest at all. When I did finally fall asleep, I was assaulted by a variety of dreams of Edward, Jacob, and his girlfriend, which would jolt me back awake.
"Come on, Bella! Out of bed! The sun is up, the birds are singing, it's a beautiful morning, and you're missing it!" She shakes me a few more times for emphasis.
"I wanna miss it," I say, my words muffled from under the pillow. "It's too early. Go home, Alice. Come back in about two hours." My grip tightens on the pillow knowingly, just before she tries to rip it away. She growls a little at her failed attempt.
"Isabella Marie Swan, if you don't get up this minute, I'll bring out the air horn." My eyes fly open as I flip the pillow over.
"You wouldn't!"
"Oh, we both know that I would." She threateningly starts toward her purse; my eyes widen in fear. I know there's an air horn in there; it's her self defense weapon, though she typically only uses it as a mean way to wake me.
"Okay, okay!" I nearly shout. "I'm up!" Alice smiles triumphantly, her hands clasp onto her thighs as she's still straddling me at the waist.
"Good, now get dressed. We're meeting everyone at the beach in an hour."
"Who's going?"
"Everyone. The weatherman said this is probably the last day of summer we're going to get, so we want to spend it at First Beach."
"Okay, but who's everyone?" What I want to ask is 'will Edward be there?' but I know how weird that would sound. Alice is as clueless as anyone, and I definitely don't want her asking questions. I'm not sure that I want to spend the day with Edward after last night either.
"Angela, Ben, Mike, Jessica, and the bitch, Lauren." Alice rolls her eyes as I wait with bated breath, silently wondering if she'll mention Edward. But I shouldn't have worried; Alice smiles at me meaningfully.
"Yes, I'm sure your boyfriend is going too." My response is nothing more than a long exhale. I don't know how to feel about that at all. Should I feel happy? Relieved? Nervous? Perhaps spending the day with him is exactly what I need.
Throwing the blankets back, I sit up while Alice crawls off of me.
"Do you have to shower? Cause I kinda told everyone we'd be there in about thirty minutes." Alice throws me an apologetic grimace.
I shake my head at her; I don't need to shower. After the kiss with Jacob last night, then Edward, I felt irrationally dirty. As a result, I ended up taking an extremely long and exfoliating shower, scrubbing off at least three layers of skin while crying.
"I'll just throw my hair in a ponytail and brush my teeth. Give me ten minutes." Alice comfortably props herself up on my pillows as I shuffle to the bathroom. A groan erupts from my chest as I take in my appearance in the mirror. I look terrible. Remind me never to go to sleep with my hair wet again. The knotted mess looks like a pack of squirrels could take up residence in there. My cheeks are a little puffy from crying while the bags under my eyes have increased and darkened due to my lack of sleep.
My actions from last night haunt me, like dark and dismal shadows looming over my head. The heaviness of my decision weighs across my heart as I try to tame the squirrels' nest.
In one split second last night, my decision was made.
I didn't tell Edward about Jacob.
After I kissed him, he looked at me with those deep green, beautiful eyes; so full of love and trust and devotion. I couldn't do it. I couldn't bare the thought of those eyes looking at me any differently.
It's selfish. I know that. I know it's selfish and dishonest and completely incorrigible. But what other choice did I have?
Though, if I'm being truthful, it wasn't just the look in Edward's eyes that made my decision. It was Jacob too.
His kiss had been so special in its own unique way. It was comforting, sweet, and unexpected. It was- in all its simplicity- perfect. And I couldn't taint that.
I didn't want to taint it. It was a good memory, a good moment, and a wonderful kiss. The first and last that I would ever share with him. In that split second, when I looked into Edward's emerald eyes, I knew what to do.
Now, here I am, getting ready to spend an entire day at the beach with my friends and my boyfriend.
This should be fun, right? Then why am I dreading it?
I attempt to clear my thoughts, concentrating on nothing but the blackness behind closed eyelids. Slowly, I open my eyes, locking them on the girl in the mirror. She looks so different from the girl I knew a week ago. She stares back at me with a blank expression, her hollow brown eyes portraying nothing. Who is this girl? Where is Bella Swan?
I drop my head into my hands, my elbows landing on the countertop. Ow! My fall in the kitchen last night flashes through my mind, and with a sharp intake of breath, I hiss through my teeth, pulling my arms up to examine my elbows in the mirror. Large bruises encircle the bones; black, blue and purple swirl together, causing an ugly discoloration of skin that fits perfectly with my mood. I turn my back to my reflection, pulling my pants halfway down my rear and examining a similar bruise around my tailbone. There's nothing I can do about my elbows, but luckily, the bruise on my rear will be covered up by my swimsuit at the beach.
I let out a sigh, thinking about the day ahead of me; a day spent with my friends, acting as though everything's normal.
I immediately begin shaking my head. I'm not ready for this. How am I supposed to act like nothing's wrong when I feel like I'm being eaten away on the inside?
I have no choice really. With a deep breath, I try to reassure myself, I can do this. I will do this. I will move forward and forget about the past. It's the only way I'll be able to get through. I just have to push all my negative thoughts and feelings aside. Mentally, I picture placing them into a large trunk, securely locking them inside.
Taking a few deep breaths, I continue getting ready, carefully applying waterproof mascara, eyeliner, and a thick coat of concealer to hide my dark circles. Dropping my hands down to my sides, I turn back to my reflection; shaking out my body, my hands and my head, I lock eyes with the girl in the mirror once more, a look of fierce determination etched on her face.
"You're going to go and have fun," she commands me. "It's just another day. No worries and no Jacob."
I nod back to her. Grabbing my hairbrush, I head back to my bedroom.
Alice has moved her position to my desk, taking it upon herself to pull up my iTunes and begin playing some music. She twists around in her chair and points to her bare wrist as a silent reminder that I need to hurry. I roll my eyes and huff a little.
"You know it's not my fault that you told them we'd be there in thirty minutes," I remind her. Picking out my blue striped bikini, I step into the closet, closing the door half way so I can still talk to Alice yet have a little privacy while changing.
"Sorry! I didn't know that I was going to wake the walking dead this morning."
I roll my eyes again as my cell phone beeps. "Alice, could you check that? It's just a text." My arms are folded behind my back, tying the strings together.
"Bella, is there something you'd like to tell me?" Alice's question is like being splashed with cold water.
I'm momentarily stunned, wondering how a text could cause her suspicion, until an image of Jake assaults me. 'There. Now you have my number' he says as he tosses my cell phone into my lap. There's a very good chance that Alice just read a message from Jake!
My foot catches as I step into my jean shorts, hastily throwing them on and running out of the closet at the same time. I stumble into the door. Grasping the handle, I regain my footing and catch Alice's quizzical look at my phone. My heart flies frantically in my chest, terrified by what it could say, especially if it's from him. As she looks up at me with one perfectly groomed eyebrow raised, I stop breathing.
My mouth opens, but of course, nothing comes out. I have no idea what to say or even how to act. I break eye contact, dropping my head and fastening the button on my shorts as something to do to stall for time.
"What do you mean?" I try to feign innocence, wondering all the while what the hell is on that message to make her ask me that.
"Are you and Edward okay?" My head snaps up, and my eyes latch onto hers. Oh, no. What does that message say? What does she know? A thousand possibilities fly at me as I try to reign in my obvious fidgeting.
"Wha-what? I mean, yeah, why do you ask? Who's the text from?" She gives me a skeptical look and stares down at the phone again.
"I want to say it's from Edward, but that's not what your phone reads," she remarks curiously. For a second, I'm stumped; I can only draw one conclusion, and it's that Jake has sent me a message that's inappropriate or crude; the kind of message that only your boyfriend should be sending you.
I try not to sound exasperated. "You're really starting to freak me out, Alice. What's it say?"
"It says, 'Guessing Alice told you, we're all going to the beach. I'm leaving in ten. Do you want me to pick you up?'"
I let out a sigh of relief. "So it's from Edward? That's doesn't sound bad at all. Why are you making such a big deal of it?"
She stifles a giggle. "Because he's been programmed in your phone as 'Doucheward.' At first I thought maybe you were fighting, and you did it, but apparently, you had no idea." My jaw drops; I forcibly close it with an audible snap. "Who do you think did it?" she asks curiously.
Think? No, Alice. I know who did it! I just can't believe it, though I shouldn't be surprised; it's not like any of Jake's brazen actions are new to me. I stalk forward, ripping the phone out of Alice's fingers and begin scrolling through the rest of my contacts, checking to see what other damage he's done. My heart skips a beat as I reach the J's, but his name isn't there. From the looks of things, Edward's is the only one that he changed. I quickly edit it back and look to Alice.
"I don't know who could've done it," I lie. "It could've been anybody. Do you want Edward to come get us?" It's my subtle yet not so subtle attempt to change the subject.
Alice distractedly nods, so I text a quick reply as I walk back to my closet.
"It is kind of funny, Doucheward." I shoot her a dark look. "Sorry, but it is. Come on, let's think about this. Who would've done that to your phone?"
At this point, I'm barely paying attention to what I'm doing; reaching into my closet, I pull out an old, oversized t-shirt and shrug it on. I really, really don't want Alice obsessing over this, but I have a feeling she won't give up unless she has a satisfactory answer.
"I dunno," I shrug as though I don't care, hoping she'll follow in my nonchalance and drop it. No such luck.
"Well, think about it! Who would've had access to your phone yesterday?"
In one quick sweep, I pull my hair back into a pony tail, biding my time before I have to answer her.
"I keep my phone in the outside pocket of my bag; anyone could've picked it up." Grabbing my beach bag, I begin scouring my room for any necessary essentials, throwing in my hairbrush, a bra and panties before I make my way to the bathroom for a towel and sunscreen. Alice's echoing voice follows behind me.
"Anyone who knew it was there! It's not like you leave it out in the open where just anybody could see it." I stand in the bathroom a moment, purposefully taking my time as I look to the girl in the mirror. She's biting her lip. "I bet it was one of the guys during lunch," Alice concludes.
I want to end this conversation as quickly as possible. Walking back into the bedroom, I contemplate a quick lie (seems I've been doing a lot of that lately).
"You know, you're probably right. I sat next to Mike at lunch; it was probably him."
"It does seem like something he would do," Alice ponders, not entirely convinced.
Slipping my feet into some worn, black flip-flops and throwing my bag over my shoulder, I collect her attention by clapping my hands together. "Let's go. I'm ready."
Her eyes snap up, raking over me from head to toe; she gives me a disdainful look.
"Ready? You look like a hobo!"
"I do not!" I retort, looking down at my baggy Fraggle Rock t-shirt and jean shorts. I have to admit, I don't look good, but I certainly don't look like a hobo. "Anyway, what did you expect? Between you and Edward I've only had fifteen minutes to get ready."
Alice shakes her head disapprovingly. "At least change your shirt."
"What for? I'm just going to take it off when we get there anyway." She still looks like she's about to refute, so I firmly add, "I'm not changing."
Alice and I flow down the stairs, taking a quick detour to the kitchen to throw a few bottles of water into my beach bag. Charlie's sitting at the bar, hot cup of coffee in one hand and the newspaper in the other.
"Morning, Daddy."
"Good Morning, Charlie," Alice's chipper voice calls at the same time as mine, pulling his gaze away from the paper to us.
"Mornin' Bells, Alice," he smiles. "What are my beautiful girls up to today?"
"We're going to the beach," I answer, picking up an apple for breakfast.
"We heard this might be the last chance we get this year before the weather turns," Alice further explains.
"Yeah, I heard that too." Charlie's gaze shifts from my best friend to me; his eyes crinkle as his smile falters. I bite my lip. I know what he's doing; he's checking over my 'appearance.'
"Is that what you're wearing, Bells?" He slowly lifts his mug to his lips and takes a sip, keeping his eyes locked with mine. Normally he's not afraid to tell me to change, but with Alice here he's trying to be affable.
"Yeah," I reply with a shrug. "We're just going to the beach."
Charlie purses his lips, giving me his 'disapproving dad' look. "That's no reason to go looking like a beach bum."
Alice raises her eyebrows, fighting a smile as she looks at me with that silent I-told-you-so look. I roll my eyes at the both of them.
"I don't think I look that bad," I say in a small voice.
Charlie continues, "The beach'll be busy today, don't you think? And you never know who you'll run into while you're out." He's given me this type of speech before, so I know I can't win. I look to Alice, but it's obvious that she's on his side. Ugh! I can't believe my best friend is choosing sides with my father!
With exaggerated effort, I throw my arms out and huff, "Fine, I'll go change!" Just as I turn to leave, I spot the pan of brownies on the counter. I scoop one up and place it on a napkin. Practically shoving it in Alice's face, I hand it over to her, wickedly laughing on the inside. "Here, have a brownie while you wait."
Charlie makes a slightly disgusted face but quickly masks it. He knows how awful those brownies are. I was cleaning up the fiasco in the kitchen last night after Edward left when Charlie came in asking when the brownies would be done. Apparently after he'd calmed down about the mess, he'd decided he wanted them. I went ahead and finished the mixture, estimating the portions that had missed the bowl and fighting with my memory on what ingredients were already added. Needless to say, the result was far from edible.
Alice bounces on her toes, giving me a nod of 'thanks' as I make my way to the door. I turn around just in time to watch her take a bite, her beautiful features contorting to repugnance as she manically searches for a way to spit out the offending treat. I can no longer reign in my revengeful laughter; even Charlie's covering his smile with the paper. He scoots his coffee mug to the edge of the bar, allowing Alice a drink.
As I make a mad dash to my bedroom, Alice's screeching voice follows with threats on my life.
~~-BoM-~~
Pulling off the strappy white sandals that I've worn in place of the black flip-flops, I arrange them neatly next to my bag. Alice whips her towel, laying it out between Angela and me. The girls of our group have made a line of beach towels, with Jessica's at the far end, Lauren, Angela, and Alice in the middle, and then mine on the opposite end. The boys of the group sit periodically in front of us, fussing over their surfboards and pulling on wetsuits – with the exception of Edward, who has made himself comfortable on the top of my towel, urging me to sit down in front of him.
Gripping the hem of my light blue sundress, I begin to pull it up, fighting a flush of embarrassment. I don't know why, but I hate undressing in front others, even if it's just coming down to a swim suit. I'm overly self-conscious about the act, maybe because it feels sexual in some way.
Folding the flowery blue sundress (which passed both Charlie and Alice's inspection), I place it gingerly in the bag as I sit down in front of Edward. He's lying diagonally across the towel, propped up on one elbow with his legs stretched out on the sand. I allow myself to relax against him, leaning my back on his smooth stomach and extending my legs the length of the towel. I'm refusing to allow myself to think of the last time I was on the beach. I force the flickering images of sitting next to Jake in the sand and that kiss out of my mind. Guilt crawls through me, but I shove it away, back into the chest where it belongs.
Edward's free hand brushes though my ponytail, causing me to jump. I quickly mask my startled expression with a small smile and look down at him. His beautiful emerald eyes are shining up at me, gazing at me as if trying to see right into my soul. I can't help but marvel at the devotion that I see in them. He loves me so much.
For a sweet moment, we're in our own little bubble, lost to the outside world. Edward's become enraptured with my hair, lightly pulling on the loose spirals framing my face and watching as they bounce back into place. I wonder how I could have ever considered hurting him. What an idiot I've been. Our relationship is so easy, so natural. Bending awkwardly, I lean down to give him a chaste kiss.
Lauren's sickly sweet voice cuts through my serenity. "Wow, Alice, a bright red bikini? You must really have confidence in your inner beauty."
Alice has just removed her tank top and is working on the shorts.
"Thanks," Alice replies nicely to her back-handed compliment. "I really like your new suit, Lauren. It doesn't make you look nearly as big as the pink one."
I can feel Edward's silent chuckles vibrating behind me; Ben, Mike and Tyler laugh out loud while Angela and I try to hold back our smiles. Jessica looks stunned while Lauren sneers.
Alice casually lies back on her towel, propped up by her elbows. "You know," she says to no one in particular, "we found something interesting on Bella's phone today."
Oh crap, Alice! Don't!
My eyes dart nervously from Alice to Edward to Mike.
"Oh, really?" Edward perks up curiously. Of course, anything to do with me and he's all ears.
"It seems someone picked it up yesterday," Alice says conversationally, eyeing Mike. "Guess they thought it was a funny prank."
"What'd you find? Dirty pictures or something?" Mike asks.
"You should know, Mike, since you were sitting next to her at lunch." Alice lets the implication hang in the air as she stares him down, daring him to deny it.
Mike looks back at her like a deer caught in the headlights. "What?"
Alice gives an exasperated look as Ben chimes in for her, "You messed with Bella's phone yesterday?"
"Who the hell cares?" Lauren mutters as she lies back on her towel. For the first time ever, I'm in agreement with her.
"What'd he do, Alice? Take a picture of his junk?" Tyler laughs.
"Mike! You took a picture of your junk with Bella's phone?" Jessica stupidly yells, throwing a rock in his direction.
"What? No!" Mike turns red at the prospect.
I'm torn on what to do. I feel bad for not stopping Alice's interrogation of Mike and leaving him to fend for himself, but even if I did aver his innocence, I wouldn't be able to explain it without giving away Jake. This whole thing is a stupid mess that's gotten way out of hand.
"What did you find on your phone, Bella?" I try not to flinch when Edward addresses me instead of Alice.
"I'd rather not say," I answer truthfully. "It's really not that big of deal anyway."
"Come on, Mike, admit it!" Alice taunts.
"I really don't know what you're talking about," he replies.
Alice scrunches her face up like a petulant child. "So you didn't change Edward's name to Doucheward?"
They bust out laughing – all of them except for Edward and me.
"No," Mike wheezes out between snickers, "I definitely did not do that, but I want to know who did and congratulate them! That's hilarious!"
"I don't think it's funny," I state, perturbed and offended with all of them.
"It's all right, Bella," Edward whispers to me with an appreciative smile. "I don't care."
"No, you're right," Angela says, curling under her lips in an obvious attempt to reign in her smile. "It's not funny."
The laughter slowly dies down, but only after a few more grunts and murmurs of "Doucheward" are thrown in for good measure. I give each of them disapproving looks. Edward just strokes my hair, shaking his head slightly and rolling his eyes at our friends. Eventually, the girls go back to their sunbathing while Mike, Tyler, and Ben take their surfboards to the water.
After a moment's silence, Alice pounds her tiny fists into the sand. "I don't get it! If it wasn't Mike, then who was it?"
"Alice, let it go," I whine. I thought we were finally past this. I should've known better.
"I admit, I was wondering about it too," Edward says. Lauren and I groan at the same time. I almost feel like crying. Why couldn't they let this go?
"Edward, has anyone ever called you…that before?" Alice asks.
"No, that's a new one for me. What about classes, Bella? Who did you sit by?"
Internally, I'm freaking out. These two are getting way too close to the truth. If I tell them who I sat by in my classes, it'll narrow down their possible suspects – Jake being one of them. Something inside tells me this is a very, very bad thing, though I'm not sure why. All I know is I want to keep their thoughts as far away from Jake and me together as possible.
I realize I'm taking too long to answer him, but I can't come up with an adequate lie or even a suitable change of subject.
"I don't know," I finally say with a defeated feeling in the pit of my gut.
"Well," Alice answers for me, "in History you sat next to…" My mind starts going into panic mode. I want to jump up, run, or scream. Instead, I sit shell-shocked, too terrified to move. "…me, I think Ashley, and behind you- Bella! Look out!" Alice shouts, her eyes looking past me. I turn my head, following her gaze.
Several things happen simultaneously. A large, shirtless male is running backwards, half tripping and half jumping to catch a football in mid-air. It slips cleanly through his fingers, landing somewhere in the vicinity of Lauren, who screams. The male then falls backward, twisting around as he goes. I begin to move, but I'm not fast enough as he lands on top of me. His hands slap down on either side of me, catching himself from crushing me completely, but his lower half has pinned down my legs. His eyes are locked downward as his face is practically nestled between my breasts.
I'm wide eyed and trapped against two men; this one on top of me and Edward still lying behind me. As the male on top of me laughs, I gasp with recognition.
A/N: I know, there was no Jake in this chapter either. But do not fear my dear ones, he is coming soon! This chapter was originally twenty pages which is twice as long as my normal chapters. So I decided to cut it in half. I promise, chapter 7 will be posting just as soon as I tweak it. ;-)
Anyway, how did we enjoy this update?
Thanks to my beta jkane180 and wordslinger for supporting me through this chapter! I don't think I could do it without you girls!