Stolen Hearts Chapter Nineteen
Vegeta found Bulma not long after, for she had not traveled far in her exhausting distress. He came to her side and stood in silent misery, she was crumpled on the ground drinking in the moment when the blackness would hit her and the void would call.
He gathered her in his arms silently, holding her close and trying desperately to quell the shakes that ripped through her small frame.
Swiftly Vegeta carried her away from Elvin land and back to the safety of her people. He stopped a mile or so from the Fey Castle and set Bulma down, still shaking and listless.
His heart ached at the sight of her more then he thought one heart could possibly ache. He wished more then anything she could just be mad, that she could just hate him and be able to move on with her life as if he had never existed. He could not stand that he had caused what he loved so dearly so much pain. It unmade him.
He had always suffered from violent emotions but this was too much and he started to cry. It was such a sorrowful sound that it made Bulma pause in her own anguish and finally glance up at him for the first time since this whole disaster had started.
She didn't think he could make a sound like that, and it broke her heart in turn. How had things gotten so bad so quickly? Was he not the same man she had loved regardless of his past discresions, was she not the same one he loved despite hers? Could they ever get past this?
The hate Bulma had felt before fizzled into nothingness as she watched him. She sat in awe at the fact.
She couldn't hate him. She couldn't hate the man who killed her brother because she loved him so much. She loved him so much and so desperately that she would love him still even if he killed her.
Bulma gasped at her realization, it left her breathless and confused. How could she love so much? She left the palace this morning not knowing exactly how she felt about Vegeta and now only after she found out that he had killed her brother did she realize how much she really did love him. How crazy was that? But that is exactly what she was. And she didn't mind it.
She was tired of fighting. Tired of the constant struggle to make sense of things, to make sense of this love. The love she now knew was there from the beginning, she had just been suppressing it in her fight against rationality, but the events of today had smashed rationality into oblivion. All she knew now is that she never wanted to see him cry again.
She lurched forward and embraced him with the passion of hopeless love, but passion above all others.
"Please stop crying! It breaks my soul apart to hear that sound! Please, forget today, I love you! Above all sense and reason I love you still, gods be damned, so please, please don't hurt my love."
Vegeta drew back in utter shock.
"You love me?" Vegeta repeted in compete surprise and wonder at how she could possibly love him, "How…? I…. I…….I love you Bulma, above everything in this world I love you! I am so sorry, a thousand years or sorry for what I've done. It haunts me every night, I know that doesn't change anything, but I am forever sorry for the monster inside me. I killed him Bulma, I killed my father, he could not live after what he did to you."
Bulma gazed wide eyed at him. "You did? Vegeta…. I ...I'm so sorry... no one should have to face their father in such a way….The world is so dark, so cold and dark, why the hell am I here? All I feel is sorrow and hate and guilt. I'm like a warning, a shapeless, odorless, gray shadow. I suck the joy out of everything I touch. I spoil it, and I have blundered always."
"Bulma, don't be sorry for that monster! It's not your fault, you are not evil, you are the one who has been wronged. You are wonderful and full of light. It is my family, they are all a bunch of absolute nothing," Vegeta said envious of the contempt he managed to put in his own voice, "I am a wicked man as well. It is I who should feel guilt, it is I who suck the joy out of everything, not you. I do not deserve your love."
"Vegeta!" she exclaimed, "You are not to say so. It is so ridiculous that it makes me feel ashamed. I love you and you do deserve it. You are not wicked," Bulma finished suddenly completely convinced.
"You would not call me a wicked man?" Vegeta asked in surprise.
"I would not dream of such a thought," she said fiercely, "You were raised by wicked people. You were never given a chance. Your mother…….." Bulma trailed off unable to finish, and not wanting to bring up old horrors.
Vegeta stood looking puzzled and sad, but pleased at the same time. He considered it ridiculous to suppose that he was not wicked, but he was grateful for her faith, and amazed by her love. He had been so convinced that she would hate him. It seemed their bond was much stronger then either had ever imagined.
It had stood defiantly resisting all the attempts to break them apart. It was as if they stood brazenly taunting fate, 'Go ahead world, do your worst! Our love is real.'
"Well in any case I don't propose to be wicked any longer. It will be my business to prevent bloodshed from now on, not provoke it." In her eyes he found the will and strength to now do it. If she didn't think him wicked then he would have to be so.
"Are you sure you love me?...I have so many flaws."
"I take the good with the bad. I don't love people in slices, anyway there is absolutely no flaw that I can see. I Love you Bulma, I will love you forever." he said with that soft smile that could always bring her marching heart back to a slow walk. He said it clearly and sincerely, without any doubt, only pure confidence. And she believed him. If anyone could love her, it was him. She felt the grace of his love and it was a lifeboat to her drowning soul. She could take shelter from the storm in his arms.
This love was something that could make them extremely happy; the only trouble was that it lay at the bottom of a deep murky pool, and no matter how much water Bulma bailed out, she could never get to the bottom.
The idea that she was wicked was deeply burned into her mind, especially after the recent confrontation with Volsung. The thought that the world she was in could be soft and nourishing more then she could bare, so she stood there and wept for she didn't want to love one more thing in her life, didn't want one more thing that could break her heart into a million little pieces at her feet. But it was there all the same, and she did want it, she wanted him so much it scared her.
She knew that she did love him more then she ever thought possible and that he must feel this same fear, but he was brave enough to face it. He trusted her enough to conquer it, and that was more then enough inspiration for her to lift herself from the ground.
"What if it is juts fanciful words. What of our inevitable doom?" she said shakily, still unsure of herself.
"It is not juts words. Can't you feel it?"
"...yes, yes I do," she whispered, as if afraid to scare it away.
"And what of this fatalistic thing? What if it is just an excuse we tell ourselves so we can stop trying? Gods know it is easier to just let the current take you, but I won't. I won't give this up, I am going to fight. I am not your deceiver or your eloquent liar Bulma. When I say that I love you, I mean it with everything I have. So show a little passion when fear obscures the course, we have gotten this far not by luck, but by never turning back," Vegeta said taking hold of her and looking into her eyes.
"I am your excuse, your outlet for pain," He continued, "I make you isolate and forget your problems. I numb the bad feelings...I protect you from the world which can be so bitter and heartless. I make you happy, I make you crazy, I make nothing else matter. If you let go now, the world will kill you. I know this because I feel the same. Don't you see how much I love you? I am not afraid of what that means anymore."
She dried her tears and looked at him, smiling like a spring shower. Just when she was so exhausted with the world that she didn't think she would be able to go on, there he was. There was a passion in his eyes that she couldn't deny even if she wanted to. If only he knew how influential he could be.
"Oh gods, this is starving, incredible, insatiable, yes, this is love for the first time. I love you Vegeta, I love you so much. I was made to love you."
In a second they were kissing, feeling like the green earth refreshed by the rain. They understood each other again, and their love was as strong as the earth as well. Blessed were the tears that fell, cleaning the windows of their souls and ushering in a change of heart. Bringing a joy that only angels know. They washed the stains of life away making all forgiven and forgotten now.
Mouths sought each other again in a desperate, scorching kiss, tongues flicking out to tease along swollen lips before plunging in to tangle and twine sensually, their hearts suffused with love, yet simultaneously clenched in agony. The kiss spoke volumes in itself, and they clung to the one thing in the world that could make them complete.
As Bulma kissed him her tongue reached to caress the roof of his mouth lovingly and apologetically, letting him know that she was completely his at last. He was her one and only love. Vegeta's smile lit up his face. His reaction was as if Bulma had bequeathed upon him that title, with all of its privileges and responsibilities, like it was a priceless treasure, which it was to him. Volsung's attempt to break their love only made it stronger.
They remained inseparable until night's shade had descended, both lying and thinking of how their worlds were forever altered today. They were slowly taking it all in with only the stars to watch them.
Bulma looked at her lover lying under the brightly lit sky, moonlight clasping against his body making him shine a beautiful color, like he was a fallen angel waiting to die. She could only guess he was thinking of his family, his father. His mother. She didn't want to speak for fear of disrupting the scene before her. She wanted to take a picture and show the world what true sadness looked like.
"You should go home before they begin to worry about you," he said softly, realizing her was being watched.
"I do not care."
"You should. A loving family is nothing to take for granted."
"What about you?"
"I'll be fine. But promise to come to me on the eve of tomorrow, and we will consummate our love. It is a special time of the lunar calendar of my people where the stars and planets align with the full moon. On that night the God and Goddess are joined in union for a time of pure joy, bliss, and love where all inhibitions are put aside allowing the heavens to fill your soul with courage. It is said that if you proclaim and seal your love on that night with an honest heart, you will have a bond that will last forever. Would you spend it with me Bulma?"
"There is nothing in this world I should like better," Bulma agreed whole-heartedly, her eyes shining with love.
"You give me a great honor," Vegeta said, relieved she had said yes.
"Nay, it is you who does the honor."
"Must you quarrel at everything? I was trying to give you a compliment."
"I don't trust compliments," Bulma said with a sweet laugh, "How is it you can make me laugh no matter what darkness I face?"
"It is love."
"Indeed."
And her smile was as if the sun had risen.
Bulma returned and slept soundly- not necessarily because worry was absent -but because she couldn't take in anything else. But her sleep was filled with pleasant dreams and she forgot all about Chichi's earlier warning that was the start of all this.
AN: They finally have started to work out all the kinks… what lies in store? Find out next chapter, Thanks for reading.