Author's Note: I've been playing Mario games since he was "Jumpman" in Donkey Kong, so there's a lot of info from the games, books, toys, and anything else Nintendo makes with him. I understand the Super Mario Movie and cartoons are not canon, but I do use some of the cartoon lore in here for filler info. Also, according to Shigeru Miyamoto, Mario's creator, Mario is 5'1'' and 25 years old, such info I have used to make more sense of less profiled characters. So knowing this, please don't freak out about certain characters being so-so feet tall and so-so years old. I mean, if that stuff freaks you out then, spoiler alert, Mario is not a plumber anymore and I will make note of it in the story. Timeline wise, I'm placing this before the Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga + Bowser's Minions, Super Mario Odyssey, and Mario Party: The Top 100 games, those I have yet to properly think of ways to intergrade into this story, plus most of those games haven't even been released yet. But enough of me rambling, you want to lose yourself in a story, so here it is. Enjoy. ^_^

I'm so nervous, but I know I have to make things right. I knock on the door to the study and...nothing. I try again a bit harder, still nothing. I kick the door once...

"What?! I'm very busy!"

Bowser shouts.

"I heard you were looking for me."

There's a deafening silence, then what sounds like shuffling papers and a few grumbled words.

"Enter."

I hesitate, looking to Jr. for the last bode of confidence I need before entering and shutting the door. The room is dark, lit by torches. Bowser sits at a large desk, his chair is half out as if he expects to turn towards me when ready to pounce, and he's pretending to be reading, I know he's faking it because the book is upside down.

"You wanted to speak with me, my King?"

He puts the book down and runs a hand through his hair.

"...About earlier..."

"I'm sorry."

Now his attention is on me, actually looking at me.

"You're sorry?"

"Yeah. I didn't mean to upset you. Peach is someone you really care for. And yet knowing this, I can't seem to stop saying things about her that just make you mad. I don't intend to do it. *sharp hitching breath* It's been making me feel awful. Knowing that I've hurt you even in the slightest."

A lump is forming in my throat and it's getting harder to breathe, even my eyes are starting to water. He just looks at me stunned. I'm about to cry in front of him while apologizing even though he's the one that raged over things.

"Lynsie...Come here."

I obey, sniffling softly as I approach him and he stands up once I'm in range, that's when he pulls me to him, holding me to his chest like I did with Jr. much to my shock.

"S-Sire?"

"Shhhhh...It's okay."

This kindness...It's getting to me, I'm trembling on the edge of bawling.

"Look, I'm not always going to show you this kind of treatment. I just don't like seeing girls cry. It's really annoying. So be smart and just accept..."

He flinches when my arms attempt to wrap around him as best they can and grip him hard.

"L-Lynsie?"

"You scared the heck out of me."

His face softens and he pets the back of my head, running his claws into rub into my scalp, soothing me.

"I'm sorry. I overreacted."

"I forgive you, my King. I'm sorry I said those things and upset you."

He smiles at my words and I coo in content from his attention.

"I forgive you...Little spitfire."

There's this soft pleasant tone in his voice, so kind and warm. It couples with his caring actions to make my heart swoon. Before I even realize it, I'm nuzzling my nose into his neck as best I can while avoiding his spiked collar. This flusters the Koopa King, his body heats up and he pushes me away with a deep blush coloring his face, but his simple push is strong, so I land on my butt a couple feet away.

"Lynsie? You okay?"

"It's fine. Just...Wasn't expect that."

"Me either. *nervous* W-Why were you, um...?"

Now I'm the blushing fool.

"My apologies. But you were being so nice to me...I wanted to be nice back to you. So...I got affectionate."

He's stunned and shame has me looking at the floor, yet this makes him pout.

"I...I didn't say it was a bad thing."

I look up at him surprised and he's rubbing his arm sheepishly.

"D-Don't look at me like that."

"Sorry."

"Just...Don't do it again."

"Yes, my King."

"You can go now. I'm sure Jr. will want to play or something."

"Of course. But before I take my leave, is there anything you would want me to do for you, my King?"

"Huh? Oh...um..."

He looks off in thought for a moment. I watch as his serious face shifts into a smile, then a smirk, then a look I'm unsure of and he blushes before shaking his head to revert to normal yet embarrassed.

"Just take care of Jr. and keep out of trouble."

"Yes, my King."

I bow in respect and leave him to his work or whatever he was doing then rejoin Jr. who had to back away from the door.

"You hear all that?"

He snickers.

"You made Papa all goofy."

"Did I?"

"Yeah. I can get so many new toys!"

I smile at this child, his amusement and energy is contagious, so I pick him up.

"What now my Prince? Shall we play a game or explore? What is your desire?"

"Hmmm...*gasp* We can go see the Koopalings!"

And I just died.

"You sure?"

"Yeah! I wanna show you off."

Such a silly boy.

"Okay my Prince, lead the way."

Not like I have much of a choice. Using my hair once more as reigns, Jr. leads me deeper into the castle. I really need to get a map of this place in the future or I'll get lost just leaving to get food. Far into Bowser's castle, we come to an area that resembles his room but much bigger and with 7 split off rooms.

"You sure they're here? I thought they had their own castles."

"They do. But they like to stay near Papa in case he needs them for something."

"Makes sense, they are his generals."

"Whoa. You really do know a lot, Mama."

"I try. After all, knowledge is power."

"That's my line."

We turn to this voice as its owner comes out of its respective door.

"Well aren't you the cool dude."

"That's Roy, Mama."

Roy Koopa stands at 5'8'' tall and has the same yellow and tan skin complexion as the other Koopalings, but his head is pink instead of the standard green coloration. Roy has two fang-like teeth in the upper corners of both sides of his snout; they are the same depicted with Larry. His mouth is feline-shaped, as his lips are deeply curved, and his nose is flat. His head is a very simple round shape, and like the other Koopalings, he has a four-ribbed, plated belly and padded feet. Roy is rather large when compared to the other Koopalings, though shorter than Morton and Iggy, though this may be due to his shoulders being hunched over. He has long arms and hunched shoulders, as a gorilla does. His shell is purple, lined with a white encasing, and bearing multiple, short spikes circled with hot-pink rings. Roy wears the same metal, spiked cuffs as the other Koopalings, but his distinctive trademark is a pair of cat-eyed hot pink sunglasses; if I had to describe these glasses, I'd say they were "bad boy sunglasses" and are his most defining feature.

"Who's the lady, squirt?"

"This is Mama Lynn."

He looks at us funny.

"Mama?"

"It's just a thing he calls me. The name is Lynsie or Lynn for short."

He barely pulls his shades down and looks me over before putting them back up with a smirk.

"Not bad. The old man has good taste. I was beginnin' to think he was never gonna switch things up."

I snort a chuckle.

"Boy, how old are you?"

"Old enough, sweet cheeks~."

"He's twenty-four."

"Shut it, squirt!"

"Dude, I'm out of your league."

"A tough cookie huh? Still cute though."

I can't help but blush a little and it makes him chuckle.

"So why you two here anyway?"

"I'm showing Mama around and thought you guys would want to meet her."

"I don't know about the others, but if ya want...I wouldn't mind if cutie kept me company~."

I roll my eyes, finding him silly.

"Sure. We can play with you."

I don't think Jr. understands flirting all that well.

"Eh...Whatever, squirt."

He skulks over to a beanbag chair and plops onto it like a cool guy.

"Come on Mama, let's play!"

"Okay, sweetie. What do we play?"

"Hmmm...Oh!"

Jr. smacks my head and leaps off me.

"Tag! You're it!"

He laughs and runs off.

"You little stinker!"

The chase is on. I do what I can to keep up with this boy of limitless energy. Roy watches on, amused as he slips on a headset and tunes the world out with some music. But I am not as boundless as I think I am because after a good ten minutes followed by random tripping over a skateboard, I crash face first on the floor and stay there in defeat. This gets to Jr., who in worry comes over and gains Roy's attention, then pokes me.

"Mama? Are you okay? Mama?!"

I don't do anything for a few moments before suddenly grabbing Jr. who shrieks in shock but is soon laughing loudly as I blow raspberries on his belly.

"Ha ha ha ha! N-No fair! Heh heh heh! You c-cheated!"

"All is fair in love and war, sweetie. *raspberry* By the way, you're it. *raspberry*"

Such a crazy scene makes Roy snicker and takes his headset off.

"So lady...What kind of Princess are ya?"

"I'm not a Princess. *raspberry* I'm just a girl two Koopas thought was Peach based on that I'm human and was at Toad Town. *last raspberry*"

"Heh...Those were some dumb Koopas."

"Mama, let me go now."

"Hmmm...Nah!"

I hold Jr. close and cuddle him much to his displeasure.

"I think I'll cuddle you now."

"No! Big bad boys don't like cuddles! Right, Roy?"

Roy simply shrugs.

"Depends on who's givin' them. I know I wouldn't turn a cuddle down if you were the one offerin', sweet cheeks~."

Jr. huffs and I get a mean idea.

"Do you really want one, Roy?"

He looks at funny and I let Jr. wriggle free.

"You seriously offerin'?"

"For a limited time only. Act now while supplies last. Unless you don't really want to..."

"Deal!"

He bolts to me, tackling my chest and knocking me over. Man, the books weren't kidding when they said Roy was the powerhouse of the Koopalings. His strong arms wrap around my waist and he nuzzles up into my neck. I blush big time because this is both embarrassing and yet feels really nice at the same time. To this Jr. takes notice, especially when Roy purrs a little and I let slip a small coo.

"Heh, you like this cuddle don't cha, sweetheart~?"

"I could ask you the same thing. You're rather affectionate for a tough guy."

"Well sweet cheeks, if there's anythin' you need to know about me, it's this. I'm tough when I have to be and tender when I should be. And right now...I'm feeling like I should be very tender~."

I see where Bowser's flirtatious side went when it came to these kids.

"Roy, get off my Mama!"

Jr. is not too happy about what he's seeing. Like father like son, he doesn't like to share what is his.

"Beat it, squirt! Can't ya see I'm hookin' up here?"

Jr. is confused.

"Hooking up?"

I just snicker.

"Not even close, dude."

"You won't be sayin' that after we kiss~."

He puckers up and I try to move away, but luckily, Roy is moved off me by magic much to his annoyance.

"Hey! Who the heck...?"

"Such caddish behavior is beneath you, brother."

"*growls* Ludwig..."

Returning to an upright position, I spy the magic-wielding Koopaling called Ludwig von Koopa, the leader of the bunch and oldest of the seven. Like the other Koopalings, Ludwig has yellow and tan skin and a green head. He also has a four-ribbed, plated belly and padded feet. His facial features are defined, having shaped cheeks, a high nose, a low jaw, and deeply curved lips; his features are most similar to Roy's, although he is unique in having one fang tooth in the upper center of his snout, along with a complete set of teeth as revealed by his smile. He has a round head and small, circular gray eyes. A slight shadow over him also reveals that his eyes present the tapetum lucidum, as eye-shine can be seen in that darkness. Ludwig is average in height to most other Koopalings, standing at 5'4''. He is, to my understanding, taller than Lemmy, Larry, and Wendy but shorter than Roy, Iggy, and Morton. His body is like a wider version of Larry's. Ludwig is best known to have large, wild, blue hair. He also has small, blue eyebrows. Ludwig's shell is blue with light orange rings surrounding the multiple, short spikes. Ludwig wears the same metal spiked cuffs as the other male Koopalings do.

"Please, forgive my brutish sibling for his less than refined behavior."

"No worries. He was just being silly is all. No harm was done."

"Put me down, ya nerd!"

"As you wish."

With a swing of his blue wand, Ludwig sends Roy flying into an open treasure chest and it shuts on him but doesn't lock.

"*muffled* You're such a dork, Ludwig!"

"Yeah-yeah, great comeback as always, Roy. And to whom might you be milady?"

Jr. comes over and hugs me around the neck.

"This is my Mama. Mine! No one else's."

I giggle and pat his head.

"My name is Lynsie or Lynn if you like. I'm the young Prince's new caretaker after a failed Peach kidnapping brought me here. Does this explanation help you to better understand my presence here, oh eldest Koopaling?"

He is blank of emotion before a small smile graces his maw.

"My, such a respectful flower graces the good castle Koopa this day. While you may not be the one Lord Bowser desires, I find you so far a better treasure than that pink gold Peach."

"Ah, so the rumors are true. You doubt Peach is worthy of Bowser's hand, I mean, claw?"

Ludwig's smile grows and Jr. is confused as Roy emerges from the chest.

"The flower seems to know many things. Indeed, while in the start, I did not mind the Princess holding such favor of our King Dad. But one needs only look at such an image long enough to see the poisonous fruit this would blossom forth. She will never want to be his. Her heart is to another and there's no stealing it even if he captures her form."

He is very refined and mature...I like him.

"If you don't mind me asking, what be your age?"

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours."

"It's impolite to ask a lady her age."

"Then a mystery I shall remain to you."

He smirks with a wink and I glare playfully.

"Thirty."

"Twenty-nine."

"Dang, y'all two are old!"

"You're not that far behind us, brother."

"Mama's not old. Kammy is old."

To that, we all agree.

"Anyway...Would the flower like to accompany me and listen to some music created by the Conductor of Chaos?"

"*whispers* That's his nickname, Mama. *snickers*"

"Cute. But as tempting as that sounds, I'm afraid my time this day is allotted to Jr.. Maybe some other time?"

Jr. beams with delight, Ludwig takes this with a grain of salt but Roy dislikes this.

"Mama..."

"Yes, sweetie?"

"I'm hungry."

"*overly dramatic gasp* Oh no! My sweet Prince is in need of sustenance. To the kitchen, we must go! Yoshi mode, activate! *goofy noises* Yoshi!"

"Go Mama Lynn Yoshi! Away!"

I gallop away with Jr. and the others just stare in confusion.

"Dude...Do ya ever get the feelin' that Jr. acts like that to get away with things like that?"

"He may be the youngest of us all, but he may be the most brilliant person I have ever met."

"...He's gonna rub it in our faces isn't he?"

"No doubt."

"Damn that squirt."

"Sheer genius."

[Meanwhile: In the kitchen]

"Thanks for the cookies Mama. I can never reach the jar without climbing and stuff."

"You're welcome, sweetie. Heh, sweets for my sweet Prince."

"Awww!"

Jr. hugs me tight.

"I love you, Mama."

My heart swells to the max.

"I love you too Jr.."

"Can I have a kiss Mama?"

"You can have all the kisses dear."

I pepper his cheeks with kisses and he giggles happily.

"*laughs* Mama's kisses are like candy."

"And they're all yours, sweetie."

"A bit rude, don't you think?"

Ah, crap.

"All that sugar will rot my boy's teeth. Maybe you should share those candy kisses with the rest of us."

Ah, Bowser's charm never ends. At least he's in a good mood as he enters the room.

"Ho ho, very funny. Ha ha, it is to laugh."

"Hi, Papa."

"Hello, son. I trust 'mama' has been taking care of you?"

"Mama's the best! She got me cookies."

Bowser eyes me.

"Not a lot, sir. Just enough for a quick snack. Can't spoil lunch, now can we?"

"As long as it's not gross."

"Oh my god, you are just so cute! I think I might die from it."

"No, you won't. See?"

Jr. makes this super adorable cute face and I grip my chest in pain.

"Argh! It's happening. Cuteness...overload...*coughing gasps*"

Jr. looks freaked out but Bowser just rolls his eyes with a laugh.

"Papa, help Mama!"

"In a minute. I'm enjoying the show."

"Papa!"

"Jr...*wheeze* Remember me fondly...*groan*"

I fall to the floor unmoving and Jr. is in full panic.

"Papa, please!"

Bowser chuckles.

"Okay, son. Step aside and let me show you how to save a girl."

Jr. moves away and Bowser comes over to me and kneels.

"You having fun acting like such a ham?"

"*whispers*...And you're eating it up."

"Yep, it's very delicious. But you're scaring Jr.. So stop being dead or I'll be forced to make you."

"*whispers* And how do you intend to do that?"

"The same way that is done in every storybook ever made."

Wait...He can't possibly mean...

"You wouldn't dare."

"Want to really make that bet?"

He's bluffing. He has to be.

"*whispers* You can't bluff me. You wouldn't dare kiss another girl that isn't your beloved Peachy."

"You don't know the extremes I'd go through for my son. Now get up or pucker up. Your choice."

That sneaky son of a turtle...I hate losing!

"Fine. *gets up* Yay! Thank you, my King. You have saved me from the brink of death itself. Truly you are without equal."

"*snickers* I know you're just being cute, but that is really boosting my ego to new heights."

"I aim to please."

"Mama!"

Jr. hugs my neck so tight I can't breathe.

"I'm sorry I killed you! I promise to never do it again."

"*choking* I...forgive...you...sweetie..."

"Jr., ease off your 'mama's neck there. She's turning purple."

"Oh no!"

He lets go and I gasp for air which makes Bowser laugh.

"Sorry, Mama."

"*sigh* It's okay, sweetie. You didn't know. After all, you're a growing boy. Getting stronger each day. And someday before you even know it, you'll be just like your Papa. Or better. Always aim high and dream big."

"Okay. Thanks, Mama."

"Jr., why don't you go run off for a little bit. Maybe make something for your 'mama'."

Jr. shoots his father a look.

"I don't know...Last time I left the room, you got mad at Mama and then the two of you got all mushy."

"That is not what happened!"

"I don't know, my King. You were fairly affectionate."

"Do not encourage him with such slanderous lies!"

Oh my god, this is priceless! Flustered Bowser is as funny as he is cute.

"Okay, I'll go. But...I want something first."

"What?"

"I want triple chocolate cake for dinner."

"Sweetie, even I know that's too much sugar before bedtime."

"But Mama!"

"How about ice cream as a compromise?"

"...Alright."

"Good boy."

I ruffle his head and he laughs before running off.

"Hard to tell he's a teenager. I'm guessing your line of Koopas age slowly."

"Yeah, but you get used to it."

I stand up and he does the same.

"Come. Let's walk."

Oh great, one of those type of things.

"As you wish, my King."

We leave the kitchen and I follow him. Even though it feels like he's headed somewhere, I know he's just walking around and looking at things.

"Jr. is quite taken with you."

He finally speaks.

"The feeling is mutual."

"I think you're the first person to not be driven insane by him...yet."

"He's energetic, but what kid isn't? In this environment, I can see why others would have a tough time dealing with him."

"What does that mean?"

"This is a Kingdom, my King. You are his father, yes. But you are also a busy man. A busy man with busy people who work for you. They are not up to dealing with children. They are only designed to handle the tasks given by their position."

"Hmmm...I suppose you make a fair point. Then by that logic, you were born for this job."

"I'm not saying that."

"Oh?"

"I am just doing what you asked of me. Take care of Jr.."

"Oh don't be like that. You know you're having fun."

"I'm not denying that. The Prince is a lovable boy. I can see a friendship in our future."

The Koopa King smiles.

"That's good to know. Tell me...What do you think of my castle?"

Small talk...I'm good with that.

"To be honest, I haven't seen all of it. Mostly my eyes have been on Jr.. But from the parts the Prince has shown me, I am impressed."

"Have you seen the outside?"

"No, my King. The only time I was outside, I was inside a sack."

"Would you like to see it?"

"Sure. Sounds fun."

He chuckles and continues leading through halls then even up along several stairs. But eventually, he opens a door and warm air hits us. Following out this door, we come to stand on one of the many castle wall walkways. It is here I see his kingdom.

The geography is extremely volcanic, some areas being wastelands, volcanoes, lava rivers and largely untouched by sunlight. This country is defended by the military forces of Koopa Troops with large numbers of tanks and airships patrol these lands to somehow be defeated by Mario and Luigi. Bowser has been the ruler of the Koopa Kingdom since childhood and is located not that far from Dinosaur Land.

"Not bad, right?"

"Now I see why it's sometimes called Dark Land. How thick are those clouds?"

"Yeah, the volcanoes constantly plume smoke and block most sunlight."

"It must make the moon look amazing."

"Huh?"

"You mean you don't know? Volcanic activity makes the moon blue."

"What? No way."

"Yes, way. The most literal meaning of a blue moon is when the moon, not necessarily a full moon, appears to a casual observer to be unusually bluish, which is a rare event. The effect can be caused by smoke or dust particles in the atmosphere, as has happened after forest fires and after eruptions, which caused the moon to appear blue. Sometimes even harsh snow can have the same effect, the air thick with snow, and the moon a vague blue...Very pretty. When it's a very smoky fire, fire produces large quantities of oily droplets of just the right size, about 1 micrometer in diameter, to scatter red and yellow light. Wherever the smoke clears enough in the daylight and the sun is visible, it will appear lavender or blue, maybe even indigo. But in short...The key to a blue moon is having lots of particles slightly wider than the wavelength of red light, 0.7 micrometer, and no other sizes present. It is rare, but volcanoes sometimes produce such clouds, as do forest fires. Ash and dust clouds get thrown into the atmosphere by fires and storms usually contain a mixture of particles with a wide range of sizes, with most smaller than 1 micrometer, and they tend to scatter blue light. This kind of cloud makes the moon turn red; thus red moons are far more common than blue moons."

He looks at me funny and I rub my head awkwardly.

"Yeah...I'm kind of a nerd, aren't I?"

"That sounds so cool!"

I blush and look away at the sky, I wasn't expecting him to be so excited.

"Is there anything else the moon can do?"

"Well...There is a moonbow."

"What's that?"

"A moonbow, also known as a lunar rainbow or white rainbow, is a rainbow produced by moonlight rather than sunlight. Other than the difference in a light source, its formation is exactly the same as for a solar rainbow. It is caused by the refraction of light in many water droplets, such as a rain shower or a waterfall, and is always positioned in the opposite part of the sky from the moon relative to the observer. Moonbows are much fainter than solar rainbows, due to the smaller amount of light reflected from the surface of the moon. Because the light is usually too faint to excite the cone color receptors in human eyes, it is difficult for the human eye to discern colors in a moonbow. As a result, a moonbow often appears to be white. However, the colors in a moonbow do appear in long exposure photographs. Oh! And then there's the sky halo. A 22° halo is an optical phenomenon that belongs to the family of ice crystal halos, in the form of a ring with a radius of approximately 22° around the Sun or Moon, in which case it is also called a moon ring or winter halo. It forms as the sun or moonlight is refracted in millions of hexagonal ice crystals suspended in the atmosphere. The halo is large; the radius is roughly the size of an outstretched hand at arm's length. A 22° halo may be visible on as many as 100 days per year, much more frequently than rainbows."

"Wow...You know a lot."

"Heh...Well, I try."

He looks really happy. Like this is one of those moments where he can just forget all his troubles and just lose himself in the sights of all that's his. I probably don't even have to speak so much, just keep a soft tone and let it soothe his soul. But after some time, I have to wonder...

"My King...Was there something else you wanted to discuss with me?"

"Hmmm?"

"Just curious if there was anything else you wanted to tell me while we're here."

He looks off in thought.

"Mmmm...There is one thing. But I don't know if you're loyal enough."

"I'm as loyal to your non-existent crown as an abducted stranger placed in charge of your son can be."

"...Is that a good thing?"

I sigh and pat his shoulder.

"Yes, my King, I am loyal to you. Now, what is it that you need?"

He blushes a little bit.

"I...*coughs* I need a...*mumbles*"

"I'm sorry?"

"I said...I need a...*mutters* woman's..."

"One more time Sire?"

"I need a woman's help!"

Well now...My curiosity is intrigued.

"Oh. And Kammy or Wendy can't help you?"

"No. I need a human woman's help in this matter. And before you ask any more questions, yes, it is a task of the utmost importance."

It doesn't take my mind long to guess.

"It's about Peach isn't it?"

"...Maybe."

Poor guy...I feel bad he's this hung up on her. But for as long as I am under his roof, I will respect his rule and his wishes.

"Very well. How might I help you?"

He's surprised.

"R-Really?"

"Yes, my King. While I may not be a true member of your kingdom, I am a guest in your land and home. Thus I shall obey your orders as requested. It's only fair."

"Whoa...Thank you."

I grip my chest.

"Argh! The sweetness...I see where Jr. gets it from."

He playfully punches my arm with a smirk and I laugh.

"Okay, little spitfire, can you stop being dorky and help me now?"

"Sure, my King. Whatever your wish is, I shall do."

He rolls his eyes and pulls a letter out from under one of his spiked armbands, then hands it to me.

"A royal invitation?"

"Go on, read it to me."

To you?

"My King...are you...Illiterate?"

He blushes.

"I can read! *mumbles* Not a lot, but enough. *normal* Just read it already!"

"Okay-okay. Let's see now...'Let's party! Come celebrate my birthday in two weeks, next Sunday! Be there or be square! Formal attire is a must! Princess Peach Toadstool.' Wow...Did she really send you this?"

"I may have had it taken from Wario's mailbox. I'm sure he won't mind. But what do you think?"

"About what?"

"Should I go? Would it be weird to just show up? What should I bring? I don't want to come off as desperate."

I'm taken back by this.

"What? What's with that look?"

"You're not going to, I don't know, try to take her?"

"Oh, I am. I just figure to do so at night's end. Let her have her little party and when it's over, I snatch her up. Real classy and civil like."

That blows my mind and I bust out laughing.

"Oh come on. It's not that funny."

"That's not...*laughs* That's not why I'm laughing. *giggles*"

He is confused.

"Then...Why?"

I calm down and wipe away some stray tears.

"Because...*chuckles* Peach paints you as this evil mastermind bent on ruining everyone's lives. But I don't see it. You're too darn adorable to be pure evil."

His face floods with a deep blush in shock.

"But as for helping you...I say go for it. While I still don't approve, if you really want to carry some favor with her, I recommend going and being on your best behavior. Right now, her main love interest is a short pasta loving multiple jobs having, good guy. But you are a King. You are a Royal. Sure, Mario has skills to do multiple things, but he can't keep to a single one. He can't even seal the deal with his so-called 'girlfriend'. He's irresponsible. You, on the other hand, you rule this land. You manage a whole kingdom and are responsible not only for your people but your kids. Face it, my King, you are a prize. Make her see it."

He's speechless.

"My King?"

He grabs me, pulling me to his chest and holding me close.

"B-Bowser?"

"I don't know if any of what you just said is true. But if it was, even if just a little bit...Thank you."

My heart...I can feel it shattering...I want to hold him. I want to reciprocate this. I want to comfort him. But I can't bring myself to hold him. I don't want to ruin this moment like before. All I can do is smile and lean my head against his sweetly.

"I meant every word, my King."

His hold softens and he nuzzles me gently. I can't fight it anymore...I must hug him!

"My lord!"

A Goomba waddles in the doorway and Bowser drops me like a child caught with a naughty book.

Goombas are a typically brown fungus-based species capable of speech. They resemble brown shiitake mushrooms or chestnuts with two feet, but no arms. Goombas have large faces that occupy most of their mushroom caps, while their stems attach their heads to their feet. A defining feature is their black bushy eyebrows that form a scowl. They also have two upward-pointing fangs that sometimes resemble braces. Both Goombas and Toads are fungus-based, and both originated from the Mushroom Kingdom, although according to Peach, the Goomba race betrayed their homeland many years ago. Goombas are among the most common foot soldier in Bowser's command. They can typically be defeated with a single punch, stomp, or fireball attack, although some are a bit more resilient. When jumped on, Goombas usually flatten before being defeated. Although Goombas are physically weak, they are very adaptable. Regular Goombas have been encountered in almost all types of terrain, while many variants have emerged well-suited for certain environments. Goombas' main form of attack is walking into their opponents. A Goomba's only real strength is that they work in large groups to attack an enemy. This forces the opponent to be much more cautious as he or she fights the group. In some games, Goombas can also use attacks such as charging with a headbutt, headbonk, biting, rolling, kicking, and spitting thorns from their mouths. And while these creatures sound weak and helpless to a point, they are usually the minions that storm the castle to get Peach. Yeah, they're better than her Toads and Toads have freaking arms!

"What?!"

"The tailor you requested is here to take your measurements. Are we still needing them?"

"Yes, we're still using them! I want to look sharp for my Peach. I'm a prize and I have to look it."

I smirk. I have fanned the flames of his ego and now he's on a whole new level of peacockery.

"Alright, my lord. If you'll please follow me, we can get you all set."

"Heck yeah!"

They start to leave as I get off the floor.

"Lynsie..."

The King calls from the doorway.

"Yes, my King?"

He's silent for a bit, his back to me, I can't tell if he's okay or not.

"...Keep up the good work."

I smile.

"I will."

"And don't use my name!"

He leaves on that note and I know he's fine. At least he's happy. And that makes me happy...till I realize something.

"How do I get back out of here?"

Just in case there is still some questions to my logic, I'll help clear up a few things. Using the Official Nintendo chart (google super mario bros size chart and it's the first image you see) we can see how tall a lot of them are, though I had to guess height for the Koopalings based on screen images of them next to each other, plus Mario and Luigi. Now the Nintendo-approved statue poster claims it to be "life-sized", thus putting Mario's height at 155 cm (5'1"). Using that information along with this universal size chart, it's possible to estimate the height of all of the mainstays of the franchise. From shortest to tallest: a Goomba is 72 cm (2'4"); a Boo is 79 cm (2'7"); Baby Mario is 89 cm (2'11"); Baby Luigi is 90 cm (2'11"); a Shy Guy is 100 cm (3'3"); Toad, Toadette, and Toadsworth are 103 cm (3'5"); Diddy and Dixie Kong (on their knuckles) are 113 cm (3'8"); a Koopa Troopa is 120 cm (3'11"); a Dry Bones is 124 cm (4'1"); Bowser Jr. is 131 cm (4'4"); a Hammer Bro. is 142 cm (4'8"); a Bullet Bill is 148 cm (4'10") long and 96 cm (3'2") in diameter; a Wiggler is 159 cm (5'3") tall (not including the flower) and who knows how long; Wario and Birdo are 170 cm (5'7") (Birdo is 196 cm [6'5"] if you include her bow); Luigi and Yoshi are 175 cm (5'9"); Lakitu (including cloud) is 179 cm (5'10"); Daisy is 180 cm (5'11"); Donkey Kong (on his knuckles) and Peach (!) are 186 cm (6'1"); Waluigi (with his knees bent a bit) is 216 cm (7'1"); Bowser is 262 cm (8'7"); and Petey Piranha is a whopping 389 cm (12'9"). Normal Piranha Plants seem to vary in height depending on how long their bodies are, but the diameter of their heads is about 111 cm (3'8"). Now for the even harder part, character ages. When it comes to Jr.'s age and that of the Koopalings, I used their first game appearance as their birth year and added till now, this is why Jr. is 15 as Super Mario Sunshine came out 15 years ago and it's his first game. I'll explain why his age and his appearance don't seem to match later on, but after words I hope it'll make sense to you like it does to me. If there are any questions, feel free to ask.