Author's Note: I've been playing Mario games since he was "Jumpman" in Donkey Kong, so there's a lot of info from the games, books, toys, and anything else Nintendo makes with him. I understand the Super Mario Movie and cartoons are not canon, but I do use some of the cartoon lore in here for filler info. Also, according to Shigeru Miyamoto, Mario's creator, Mario is 5'1'' and 25 years old, such info I have used to make more sense of less profiled characters. So knowing this, please don't freak out about certain characters being so-so feet tall and so-so years old. I mean, if that stuff freaks you out then, spoiler alert, Mario is not a plumber anymore and I will make note of it in the story. Timeline wise, I'm placing this before the Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga + Bowser's Minions, Super Mario Odyssey, and Mario Party: The Top 100 games, those I have yet to properly think of ways to intergrade into this story, plus most of those games haven't even been released yet. But enough of me rambling, you want to lose yourself in a story, so here it is. Enjoy. ^_^

It had been what seemed like hours now since Bowser took up Lynsie's child-rearing duties. A harmless favor and one he doesn't mind doing. But the odd part is that he wasn't expecting her to take so long just to talk to Roy. It made him wonder just what was going on. Could they really still be talking? Roy does harbor feelings for the girl...Could he be doing something? Roy's always been the more impulsive of the bunch, the past of these kids tends to linger on in some of their behavior. God, how long has it been since they became part of his clan? He could remember the day he found them clearly.

His beloved had just kicked him out of the castle in sorrow after another clutch of eggs, the fourth or fifth time he thinks, failed to yield any life and he was wandering around the kingdom trying to think of a way to make her feel better. Lost in his melodically thoughts, the Koopa King was blindsided by a small pink shell that came and went like the wind. Now, this would've meant nothing to him normally, yet this wasn't a normal moment, as the great King came to realize that he had just been on the losing end of a very speedy pickpocketing. Not only was his coins taken but even his wristbands. How that was managed he had no clue but did have respect for such talent. So he did what any normal person would...He got mad and began hunting this thief down for revenge!

With few details to go off on, his search wasn't easy. It took nearly half an hour before he managed to catch a glimpse at the suspicious pink shell. Like a heat-seeking missile, he followed that tiny pink spiked shell till it appeared to be cornered in an old dilapidated house that barely was even a house by definition. Not like that it matters. Certainly made no difference to him when he bashed his way in. This frightened what turned out to be a baby Lemmy and was being held by a young Larry. Instantly confused, he was unaware that the boys weren't alone, nor did he realize the others had surrounded him in ambush until they attacked to defend their smaller brothers. While not effective against someone like Bowser, the children put up a hell of a fight and even managed to topple the King a few times before he resulted in using his magic to freeze them in their assault.

A lengthy chat was had, in which, he came to find out these seven misfits were orphans that had learned to fend for themselves. Whatever happened to their parents remains a mystery to this day and one that the elder children refuse to mention. This, however, seemed to be a blessing to the downtrodden King. Here were seven homeless and parent-less children that had so much potential in them. It would be a shame to let them waste away in the state they were in. No. He knew this was fate. They weren't his blood, but these kids were now going to be his family. Surely this would please his beloved. To finally have young ones running around in their lives, that will make her happy once again. That was the idea at least and for a time it did work. There was peace and love in their lives for about a year before it faded away again. But she didn't stay happy for long. She did love the Koopalings, he honestly believes she did, but they were still a bandage on her heart. They weren't HER real children. So she kept trying. She wanted so badly to be a real mother. And then, after so many failed hatchings...she was gone. Hard to believe that was fifteen years ago. Oh to be eight-teen again. But what can he say? He was dumb, in love, and believed there was nothing that he couldn't accomplish.

But since then, he has come to learn many things about these children. From the way they talk, the way they walk, the way they've grown, and the way they scheme. And with so much time having passed, he was beginning to think that is one of Roy's more deviant plays.

"Papa?"

"Huh? What is it, Jr.?"

"Is Mama almost done talking to Roy yet?"

Good question. Only problem being he didn't have an answer to it.

"Father, if you would permit, I will go check on the pair."

Ludwig is always one to offer assistance. Especially if he thinks it will benefit him in some way.

"Well..."

As much as Bowser would've liked to go himself, given that they recently reconciled, going to check on her might give off the wrong message and be seen as being clingy. Better to be safe on this one.

"I suppose you can. But no funny stuff. I don't want a repeat of last time."

"Of course, Father. You have my word."

Ludwig bows.

"And just to make sure you keep your word...Iggy will be joining you."

Ludwig looks horrified but swallows his pride. Iggy rubs his hands together in an oddly menacing way.

"Don't worry, dad. I'll make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."

"You're okay with this, aren't you Ludwig?"

Ludwig plays it with a charming grin.

"Of course, Father. Come, brother. Let us be away."

Bowser chuckles to himself as they leave. Iggy's a clever boy. But smart can often be overruled by his curiosity and minimal insanity. Yes...Iggy is a perfect guard for watching his elder brother. Nothing Ludwig can do will overtake his own goal of learning more about humans. This won't take very long.

"You know, I really wasn't going to do anything nefarious with the maiden, correct?"

"Brother, do you really think I care?"

"...What?"

"I don't care if you or Roy or Morton or anyone else has a 'thing' for her. Just don't mess with her to the point it messes with me."

Ludwig looks at his younger sibling odd.

"I'm not sure I follow?"

"Let me put it this way..."

Iggy pulls his brother in close and his voice suddenly carries a snarling tone.

"I finally have a human test subject. Not only that but a willing one. And I'll be damned if anyone, even YOU FOOLS I call family, impedes my scientific research! So play your part of the white knight like a good boy and don't get in my way."

Iggy lets Ludwig go with an innocent smile.

"I'm glad we could have this chat, brother. I do so enjoy our conversations."

Iggy proceeds to merrily stroll down the halls. Leaving Ludwig in a state of confusion.

"Man...I forgot how intense you can get."

All Iggy does is giggle. Ludwig then makes a mental note to avoid getting on his brother's bad side. It isn't long before the pair reaches their lodgings. Though, much to their puzzlement, the oddest of sounds can be heard muffled behind one of the doors. And they only seem to get stranger the closer they get.

"*muffled groans*"

"What do you think that is?"

"I don't know. But if I had to guess..."

"*muffled moans*"

"I'd say those two are in the midst of a heated mating rite."

Ludwig pales.

"W-What?"

"Shame we had the old doors replaced. The keyhole would've made an observation so much more informative and interesting."

"How are you so calm about this? That brute is violating the innocence of the tender flower."

"*scoff* You're just mad because it isn't you in there with her."

Ludwig blushes.

"T-T-That...That is a vulgar thing for you to even suggest. I am insulted you'd even think I'd be a lowly as Roy to...indulge in such lustful and carnal sins. Even if that would mean becoming so close to the fair lovely to the point where our bodies and spirits would intertwine in the most spectacular of ways."

"...I swear you get cornier every day. And that totally didn't make you sound like a huge creep."

"I..."

"*muffled* Come on, Roy, you can do better than that."

"*muffled* Sugar, I'm tellin' ya, I just can't bend like that."

"*muffled* That's because you're so tense. Let me help my tough guy feel better."

"*muffled* Mmmm...Dang, sugar...Ya got some magic fingers~."

"*muffled* Well, I do aim to please."

"*muffled* That ya do, sweetheart."

"*muffled* Okay, now try it."

"*muffled* Whoa! This is awesome!"

"*muffled* Now can you keep up with me?"

"*muffled* Babe, I'll be able to do that and so much more."

The pair of eavesdroppers is stunned.

"Awe man, now I really wish I could see in there."

Iggy drops to the floor, doing his best to try to see through the faint creak at the door's bottom. Ludwig, on the other hand, loses his flipping mind.

"I can't take it anymore!"

Before Iggy can get a chance to do anything, Ludwig storms the door and bursts inside much to the perplexed shock of the occupants inside. Thankfully, Iggy was wrong in his guess that the two were engaged in some very adult activities. In fact...uh...well...To be honest, the boys had no clue what they were doing. All they did know, was that they looked like twisted up pretzels that were stuck partway through the turns.

"Um...You boys forget how to knock?"

I ask as Roy scrambles away to get his shades from his shell. I don't know why he doesn't like showing his eyes, heck, they're gorgeous. Maybe he's insecure? Who knows.

"*snarls* What the heck is the big idea?!"

Understandably, Roy is not a happy boy.

"Why are you nerds bargin' into my room?!"

"Technically, Ludwig did. I was merely minding my own business and trying to look under the door."

"Iggy, that's not helping your case."

I untwist from my contorted pose as Roy moves to stand by my side yet in front of me.

"Well? I'm waitin'. Talk!"

Ludwig shakes his head clear of the fog that had him clouded and is able to speak.

"Father was wondering just what was keeping the dear Lynsie from returning."

"Speaking of which, what exactly were you two doing?"

"And why it requires Roy to be shell-less in the good lady's presence?"

I chuckle.

"Dudes, we were doing yoga."

That seems to go over their heads.

"Yoga is a physical, mental, and spiritual practice/discipline that can be used to better one's self. Yoga as an exercise is a more modern exercise practice influenced by the old yoga ways. It involves holding stretches as a kind of low-impact physical exercise and is often used for therapeutic purposes. Roy here was mad and his rage was controlling him as oppose to him controlling it. With enough training, he will be much more balanced and one with his emotions. Right sweetie?"

Roy rubs the back of his head and chuckles.

"At first, I wasn't sure it made any sense and she was makin' it up. But she talked a big game and I wasn't about to back down in front of my girl. So she slowly eased me into it and, yeah, not as nutty as I figured."

"But again...Why do you need to be shell-less."

"Most poses require you to be able to bend your body at certain angles. You can't do that with a stiff shell on. So we had to take them off. Simple as that."

Iggy looks suspicious.

"And what data is there to back this up?"

"What if I told you a literature review stated, 'although the results from these trials are encouraging, they should be viewed as very preliminary because the trials, as a group, suffered from substantial methodological limitations.'? Or a systematic review on the effect of yoga on mood and the brain concluded that 'yoga is associated with better regulation of the sympathetic nervous system and hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal system, as well as a decrease in depressive and anxious symptoms in a range of populations.'? The same review also recommended more methodological rigor be applied to future clinical trials."

This makes Iggy giddy.

"Okay, I'm sold. I want to do it!"

"Maybe some other time. From what you said, Bowser is being a worry wart and wondering where I am. Better let him know all is fine before he goes nuts."

Roy shoots me a glance and I gather our shells.

"Ya sure we don't need more time?"

I hand his shell to him.

"Ask yourself this question...Will you allow him to stop you from attaining that which you seek?"

His expression hardens and he takes his shell from me.

"No one can stand in my way. I won't let'em."

"That's my tough guy."

He smiles and puts it on while I go get mine. However, the other two in the room are not deaf. So hearing this odd bit of chatter has their curiosity tickled.

"Uh...Did we miss something?"

"Is something bothering you, brother?"

"Huh? Oh. It's nothin'. Sugar already helped me with it so it's no big deal. Right, babe?"

I slip on my shell and give a thumbs up.

"You got it, dude."

"See? The problem already handled."

"And if not..."

I playfully put an arm around Roy's neck.

"I'll be there to make sure you don't explode like you're part Bob-omb or something else silly."

Much to his brothers' dismay, Roy's demeanor is more relaxed and even timid to a degree. Very odd behavior indeed. But it was only as weird as the chill and confident vibe coming off her. Was the both of them doing yoga really the cause of such a change in personality? Almost like they swapped bodies in a sense.

"Come on you goofs, let's get back to the others before Lemmy raises an army to paint Bowser's shell into a rainbow."

"Yeah...That didn't turn out good the first time either."

"Are you guys talking about the Big Paint Stars?"

"Correct. Bowser accidentally created the black paint while attempting to coat his shell in a rainbow color scheme. He was promptly possessed by the paint, and proceeded to lay waste to Port Prisma."

"Yep. He is defiantly King dork."

I head out into the hall and pull Roy with me. Not that he minds, hell, he copies me but adds his style and laces his arm around my neck. My bad boy is feeling like his old self again. Thank the stars! Ludwig and Iggy follow close behind. I can see Ludwig really is displeased by the closeness Roy and I are sharing. Maybe if he made his own intentions more clear, then things like this wouldn't happen. But I got Roy and he needs me at the moment. I dropped the news to him that his own dad was trying to win my heart while knowing Roy himself had already had his metaphorical hat in the ring. This is a trigger to his rage bigger than his Bullet Cannon. As long as I can keep him calm, things should be fine. Provided Bowser doesn't do anything that provokes the boy. And if he does, well, I only pray that it happens when none of the others are around. Sadly I know such a confrontation is inevitable. They will need to talk about this. They will need to figure out how to go about this situation without going insane. And then it will fall on me to make a choice. A choice that may destroy a family. Fuck I hate choices!

"Yo, sugar...Ya okay?"

I blink a few times and smile.

"Yeah. Got lost in the sea of thought again."

"Thinkin' about if I'm gonna punch the old man?"

"I'm hoping you won't."

"I gotta admit...It's a really temptin' idea."

"Please, don't."

"Fine...But only because ya asked."

"Thanks."

"Though...Ya mind tellin' me why ya keep doin' quick looks back at the nerds?"

I blush a little.

"That noticeable?"

"Just a bit."

"...It's about Ludwig..."

He tenses up and sighs.

"Babe, please don't tell me he's 'another guy'."

"No...Not really. I'm not sure actually. He gives me mixed messages so I'm not entirely sure."

"Want me to handle it?"

"No. I think you had enough fun after the piano incident. I think this is one I have to deal with myself."

"Look at ya. Bein' all tough. I'll let this slide so long as nothing happens with you two."

I feign hurt.

"Roy, that's cold. How could you even think I'd betray you?"

He frowns.

"I didn't mean it like that. I trust ya. I mean, a lesser gal would never have told me about any of this. It's him I get the bad vibes from. If he's sneaky enough to steal ya away to make music, then who knows what he'd do. Know what I mean?"

"I know what you mean."

I give his cheek a nuzzle and he snickers.

"*coos* Ya spoil me, sweetheart."

"Is that a complaint?"

"Not on your life."

Roy nuzzles my neck and moves up to nibble my ear, making me giggle.

"*giggles* Roy..."

"That's my name, sugar. Do go on repeatin' it~."

She continues to laugh at Roy's flirtatious advances and Ludwig scowls at them from behind.

"Iggy, you're one with an exceptional I.Q., correct?"

"Undoubtedly, yes."

"Then maybe you can enlighten me on just how someone as brutish and classless as Roy can seemingly do the impossible by carrying the favor of a such a dove as our maiden? Because I can't think of any logical reason for such a clash in different types to be able to mix in a workable way as they are doing."

Iggy looks funny at his elder sibling.

"This is really eating at you, isn't it?"

"You know I'm not one to 'lose my cool', so to speak. But this is really burning my blood."

"Before you lose a screw over this, have you ever made your motives known to her?"

"I would think my interest is quite established at this point."

"No, no, no...I mean, have YOU made it clear to HER that you are interested in her? Like, with words. Words that come out of your mouth."

Ludwig opens his mouth, but no words come out. Iggy sighs and smacks his palm to his forehead.

"Oh my god...You have got to be kidding?"

"I...I honestly didn't think..."

"Do you think Roy hasn't told her he likes her? Or even Morton? Heck, even Jr. showers her with love. Even if that love is platonic and or parental, it's still a verbal acknowledgment of their feelings."

"But...Actions speak louder than words...Right?"

"And other than a false abduction, how have you shown through actions your intent?"

"Um...Oh! I've played for her."

"Oh yeah? How many times did you do that?"

Ludwig becomes very bashful.

"T-Twice."

Iggy rolls his shoulder in a shrug.

"Face it, it's not a question of why is Roy succeeding, but a question of why aren't you putting in the same amount of effort as him if indeed your goal is to get her?"

That makes Ludwig pause.

"I...I hadn't thought about it that way. I had thought that subtlety was the way to woo a woman's heart over time. But now..."

"That plan might have worked had you miscalculated. A subtle approach would be ideal if the castle only consisted of you, dad, Jr., and her. But the fact is, there are more male options here. And some of those options are more direct in their approach. Therefore, those more upfront with their intentions males have a higher probability of gain the affection of the female they seek. So this slow shy nice guy route is not going to get you anywhere when all the other roads she can go down are faster and more simple paths. So unless you want to keep pinning from afar and pulling out your hair in frustration, I suggest you change your tactics and come clean to her the next chance you get. Preferably when Roy or Morton isn't around."

Ludwig just looks as though he were slapped about the face.

"What? Was it something I said?"

"You've had such knowledge in you this whole time, yet...You haven't gone after the fair maiden yourself?"

"Meh...I'm not interested in such things. Granted, if I were, she'd be high on my list of possible partners. But...Like I've said, I'm not interested in the act of coupling. At least...As of now, I'm not. The future is full of unknowns."

"Okay...But why? I mean...I respect your decision, but do tell how you can enjoy her company and not be charmed?"

"Simple, I'm already in love."

Ludwig's eyes widen.

"With who?"

Iggy strikes a proud pose.

"I'm in a long-term relationship with good lady science."

Ludwig nearly breaks his cool by laughing, but he manages to hold it in for his younger brother's sake.

"Science?"

"She is a tantalizing and often fickle mistress, but I love her none the less. Every test is a special date. Every failed result is like a little spat. And every success is like a baby being born."

"Wow...That's deep."

"The day I seek a real relationship with a person, is the day I'm done with science. Or just not as into it as before. But I feel that day is far from now and I am content with how I am."

"Hmmm...I respect that. Your path is noble one indeed, Iggy."

"Thank you. So...Are you actually going to take my advice?"

"I...I'm not sure I can act like that. What if I mess things up?"

"Think of it like this...If you do it, you have a 50/50 shot of success. If you keep going slow, then chances are increased that Roy is going to get the girl. So what's the more logical answer to you?"

Ludwig looks at the girl practically snuggling Roy and his resolve builds.

"As uncouth as your suggestion is, I can not allow a rogue such as Roy to wither the rose that has come to bloom in our humble abode. I shall make my intentions known to her tonight. Tomorrow at the latest."

"Why tomorrow at the latest?"

"One does not simply seek such a woman like her without an offering of the same worth. I will have to prepare something. Something that will speak to her in such ways that anything Roy does will be dwarfed in comparison."

"Heheheh...Go for it. I can't wait to see how this goes."

"See how this...Is this an experiment to you?"

"Heh...Lady science was tempted by a little social/biological study. And I just can't say no to that girl."

"Methinks you doth spoil science too much, brother."

"The rewards I reap are so worth it though. *demented snickering*"

It's moments like these where Ludwig pictures Iggy as this grand mad puppet master. Pulling strings and documenting what happens for his own knowledge as well as amusement. It's his unpredictability that makes Iggy such a dangerous adversary. But under the right conditions, he can be the greatest of allies. Ludwig on his end knows what he must do. He must compose something that will capture the heart of his fair flower more effectively than his father's method for capturing Princesses. This is his mission. Failure is not acceptable. Soon, Roy, soon he will come to rue the day he stood in his better's way. But of course, Roy and his gal pal Lynsie are unaware of such plots. They are too carefree and in the moment to perceive such happenings. But it would be unwise to believe that there are no tricks up their nonexistent sleeves. Never drop your guard. Never underestimate your target. Never back down even if the odds are against you. Never give up or surrender. For it is the Koopa way to fight against all who dare oppose them. Even if the one opposing them is one of their own.

[Meanwhile: In Castle Five]

This castle was not what the Mario Brothers were expecting. Sure, they know what to look forward to as the boss, or, bosses as it were. But the minions that roam the halls and rooms are the stuff of nightmares. In the main entrance is mass hordes of Bone Goombas, undead Goombas that wear skulls as helmets. They are slower than living Goombas and just as easy to defeat. But what they lack in power or speed, they make up in overwhelming numbers as they come together in groups. Of course, this was just the beginning. After the Bone Goombas were the relentless Dry Bones. Again, these undead Koopas weren't hard to dispatch yet swarmed in numbers far larger than they usually make.

"Why are there so many?"

"I don't know."

"Where are they coming from?"

"Again, I don't know."

"What are...?"

"I don't freaking know!"

To make matters worse, doorways and elongated halls are lined with Bone Thwomps. Bone Thwomps are more of an obstacle than an enemy, but getting stuck under them is still just as bad as their stony cousins. Not only that, but Bone Piranha Plants lurk in corners and crevices just eager to attack the pair in the hope of tasting living flesh.

"Mario...This is nuts!"

"You-a don't-a have to tell me twice!"

"There's no way it can get..."

"Stop! Don't you-a dare say it! Remember what happened last time?"

"Oops. Sorry. I forgot."

"Let's-a just be grateful that there's no mini-boss or something blocking the last chamber."

*haunting roars*

Luigi just looks at Mario.

"That one is on you-a, bro."

Mario slaps his palm to his fast in annoyance.

"Me and my big mouth."

Peeking around the corner leading to the door into the final chamber, a Bone Dragon blocks the way to the castle's heart. The Bone Dragon is a large, hydra-like dragon skeleton that has three deadly smoldering snapping heads that have eerie glowing green eyes. When alive, these creatures are purple with white spots that have orange frills along the snout and upper cheeks, still multi-headed, they are less sinister looking than the undead versions. Normally these creatures live in underground caverns on Yoshi Island, but it would seem that the Koopa King paid well to import this beast to stop the brothers.

"Uh...How do we...?"

"Don't chicken out on me now, bro. We beat this thing the same way we best any other enemy. By ground pounding it into the dirt where it came from!"

Mario attempts to charge at the massive monster but quickly retreats when the three heads blast fireballs at him.

"So? How did it go?"

"Don't start with me, Luigi."

Mario rushes out again, this time swinging his trusty hammer. But again, he's forced to retreat by the Bone Dragon's ability to attack in multiple ways.

"Did you-a hit it?"

"Not...One...Word!"

"What did I say? All I did was ask a question."

Mario runs back out yet with a new plan. He gets close enough, out of snapping distance, and flings his hammer at the beats. This almost worked, had it not been for the targeted head to chomp down on the hammer and crushed it to bits.

"*mournful* That was my favorite hammer...*rage* You-a mother #%*&$!"

Of course, that didn't make the dragon apologize, only pissed it off more than it already was. So once more, Mario retreated. And Luigi watches as his brother runs out, then comes back dozens upon dozens of times.

"*huffing* This...is...insane..."

"You're right about that. One of the definitions of insanity is to do the exact same thing over and over again expecting the outcome to change. Which is what you've been doing for the last...twenty minutes."

"*huffing* If you've got...the energy to mock me...then why don't-a...you-a try to beat it..."

Luigi gulps and takes a moment to think, also allowing Mario some time to get the air back in his lungs. After a few minutes, Luigi walks out into the hall to confront the skeletal goliath.

"Um...E-Excuse me?"

The heads target the small man in green and move in close.

"E-Easy there...N-Nice dragon...heh...uh...Y-Y-You-a have very lovely bones."

Their eyes blink a couple times before their skulls light up with blushes and bashful growls.

"O-Oh...And you-a also have very pretty eyes."

The once menacing undead is now becoming as giddy as a kitty.

"Can I...Can I pet you-a?"

A long series of purr-like trills rumble the dragons bones. It happily places it's large heads on the floor and Luigi, while incredibly nervous, found the nerve to cast fear aside. Cautiously, he places his hands on the skull of the middle head, giving it small pets to start with. Though he does jump at the sudden scare when one head sneezes, that quickly makes Luigi laugh and continue to tame the creature.

Realizing that Luigi had yet to return and that the noises in the hall were not of murder, Mario looks around the corner to see something that is making his eye twitch in a WTF moment that his brain can't understand. His shy and quick to flee brother is now belly rubbing the Bone Dragon, though, it's more like chest/breastbone rubbing since it has no belly. Luigi used complement...It's was super effective.

"You've got to be kidding me..."

Luigi turns and sees his brother, waving to him joyfully.

"Look, Mario! I made a new friend!"

The dragon, upon seeing Mario, snarls and readies to blast fire until Luigi settles it down.

"Now-now, be nice. Or I won't give you-a a treat."

That made the dragon whimper much to Mario's shock.

"It's-a okay, Mario. It's-a not going to attack. Just be nice and all will be good."

Mario is unsure, but if Luigi isn't dead at this point then he figures it really must be safe. Slowly he moves closer, his eyes following the beasts as the heads keep a creepy unblinking contact with him.

"See? All is good. Do you-a want to pet it?"

"Uh...Not really. We should get going. Remember? Peach is being held captive?"

"Oh no! I can't believe I forgot! I'm sorry dragon, but we have to leave and save our friend."

The Bone Dragon pouts but makes space so they can pass by to the door.

"Finally. Something goes our way."

Mario heads toward the door but is blocked by the dragon's tail.

"Hey!"

The bones rattle with a growl and Luigi pats its side.

"Bro, I think it wants you-a to do something nice before it'll let you-a pass."

"Oh for the love of...*sigh* Fine. What do I gotta to do?"

The beast gets back on its feet and opens their mouths.

"It wants you-a to feed it."

"It's-a dead. Why does it want food?"

"Just humor it. Toss a Dried Shroom or something we won't need."

"I don't have any. I only have basic Mushrooms. See?"

Mario pulls out of his pocket a regular Mushroom. Upon seeing this, one head blasts it with fire and the Mushroom is knocked away as it shrivels up, becoming a Dried Shroom.

"Looks like you-a got one now."

"It...It wasted a perfectly good Mushroom..."

"Just feed it before you-a end up making it mad."

Annoyingly, Mario throws the Dried Shroom past the Bone Dragon and it crawls after it. Once more the door to the final chamber is free to be entered.

"That was uncalled for."

"Bite me. I've had it up to here with these bone bags. The sooner we leave this place, the better."

Mario shoves open the doors and the brothers step inside. This chamber it gigantic! Far larger than the other four have been, but for good reason. As they step further in, the doors shut and an upset groan echoes.

"Stop that this instant!"

The torches flicker with life and the darkness slowly pulls back to uncover the Dragon Siblings.

Bonetail, the biggest and strongest elder. Unlike its still-living siblings, Bonetail is an undead dragon, having died of old age after not eating anything for centuries at the bottom of the Pit of 100 Trials. It was once a pet of the Shadow Queen, but it is unknown why or how Bonetail came to reside at the bottom of the Pit. According to most, Bonetail, along with their two siblings, went around the world terrorizing people some time before the Shadow Queen was imprisoned behind The Thousand-Year Door. Bonetail even in death resembles their siblings, the only difference being they are completely skeletal with cracks on their cheekbones. They are a large dragon with small withered dead-purple wings on their back that are unknown if capable of flight, and antennae resembling ponytails on their head that end in bone bulbs. They have large feet with sharp bone claws, and their tail is dead-purple, thin, and forked into three parts. Their eyes are hollow black but a faint ghostly blue hides deep in the sockets.

Gloomtail, the larger and poisonous middle-aged. Gloomtail is a large black dragon with a grayish purple-colored underside, jaw, and cheeks. They have small black-and-yellow wings on their back that are somehow capable of flight, and antennae resembling ponytails on their head that end in violet bulbs. They have large black feet with yellow claws, and their tail is light purple, thin, and forked into three parts. Their eyes are a dull blood red color.

And Hooktail, the big and conniving youngest. Hooktail is a large red dragon with a cream-colored underside, jaw, and cheeks. They have small red-and-purple wings on their back that are somehow capable of flight, and antennae resembling ponytails on their head that end in yellow bulbs. They have large red feet with purple claws, and their tail is light purple, thin, and forked into three parts. Their eyes are a dull green in color. Speaking of Hooktail, they aren't looking so good.

"Bleck! That awful sound! It...sounds like a cricket! And...a frog? Urp..."

"Hook? Are you alright?"

"Ugh...I got really bad...ugh...food poisoning once when I ate a cricket and frog. Just hearing a cricket chirp makes me feel woozy! I HATE them! *groans* Ooooog...Must...not...gag...My poor tummy...Uuuuurp...So very woozy...Blurp! Why do I always have to feel so faint every time I hear a...urp...cricket or frog?"

"Keep it together, Hook. It's just a sound. Focus on the fools that dared to come here and think they can possibly defeat us."

Hooktail shakes their head, trying to clear up their nausea as Gloomtail suggested.

"I guess you are right. I need to focus. But they don't appear tasty. And they're so small. Hmmm...I suppose they might make a good snack. And the bottoms of their feet smell like they might make a good sauce with some spices."

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Bonetail howls and Gloomtail nods in agreement.

"They have a point. When are you ever going to stop with this ridiculous foot fetish of yours?"

"It's not a fetish! I have a really strong nose and I can smell things you can't!"

"I don't know..."

Mario interjects.

"When I fought you-a for the Crystal Star, you-a were trying to offer me a chance to smell your feet. Even going so far as to tell me that 'people pay good money to do this'."

The elder dragons look at their younger sibling with disgust and all Hooktail can do it shrug with a guilty expression.

"Hook, I think you have a problem."

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Yeah, you said it."

"H-Hey! This isn't supposed to be about me! This is supposed to be about them!"

The dragons once more pay attention to the two humans standing before them.

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Indeed. We've fought the red one before, so the green one might be just as troublesome. But then again, unlike our past battles, we are no longer fighting alone. I say the odds are in our favor."

"Yay! I'm so hungry from waiting here. What I'll do is saute them to crispy goodness and gobble them down...HEADFIRST!"

"My first fresh meat in ages...Allow me to take my time...And toy with you for awhile!"

"You hear that? Snack time, little appetizers! But which one of you morsels should I taste first?"

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Will you cut that out!"

Gloomtail bops the top of Bonetail's head and the dim blue hidden in its skull burns bright, giving them normal looking ghostly blue eyes.

"*snarls* You dare hit me?! Wait...I...I can talk? I can talk again! Finally! Thank you!"

"Welcome back, bonehead."

Bonetail takes a better look at their surrounds and glares menacingly at Mario.

"You!"

"Me?"

"Him?"

"Not helping, Luigi"

"You, red man...You defeated my master. She is forever gone from this world thanks to you and your meddling. You will pay dearly for such a treacherous act!"

Bonetail rears back on its hind legs in a threatening pose.

"GWAAAAH HA HA HA HA! Quake in fear, mortal fools! For I am Bonetail! Strongest of the Tail Trio! I will avenge my master by taking your lives...and then gnawing on your bones for eons to come!"

Gloomtail nudges Hooktail.

"See that? Now THAT is how you do evil right. No fooling around. No pretending to learn a lesson when things look bleak. Just straight up, honest, down to the point wicked intent."

"*grumbles*...Shut up."

"Get them my brethren! Feast upon their flesh and let them know what the face of death looks like!"

And like that, the battle had begun. This was going to be a hard match for the Mario Brothers to overcome without a battle buddy like when these monsters were fought the time. Even as the weakest among the three, Hooktail is a powerhouse. Sporting nasty Fire Breath, crippling Stomps, and Chomps that would break stone. Gloomtail is even stronger than Hooktail, possessing Poison Breath, thunderous Stomps, bone breaking Chomps, ground wrecking Earthquakes, devastating Charges, and powerful Megabreath flames. And lastly, the destroyer of the three, the elder dragon Bonetail. This undead foe attacks with Dangerous Breath that can put opponents to sleep if it comes out white, confusion if green, shrink if purple, and freeze if blue, the beast can Recover from damage as well, plus like it's siblings they have death dealing Stomps and Chomps that crush anything that gets in its jaws.

Yes, this was going to be the most difficult, if not, THE most brutal battle the Mario Brothers have ever faced. Unless Bowser does something spectacular if and when they reach him, the King of the Koopas will fail in comparison to the Dragons. It will take every trick in Mario's and Luigi's playbooks to escape this chamber alive or with as many lives as possible that they've accumulated over the course of their adventures. At least they have an advantage over one of the three. Each move they make creates a stomach-wrenching sound that weakens Hooktail to a degree. But that's only one problem that's weakened and that leaves two more ready to swoop in to make up for the disadvantage. Only skill, luck, time, and the number of remaining items they have will tell if the Mario Brothers can win this.

Just in case there is still some questions to my logic, I'll help clear up a few things. Using the Official Nintendo chart (google super mario bros size chart and it's the first image you see) we can see how tall a lot of them are, though I had to guess height for the Koopalings based on screen images of them next to each other, plus Mario and Luigi. Now the Nintendo-approved statue poster claims it to be "life-sized", thus putting Mario's height at 155 cm (5'1"). Using that information along with this universal size chart, it's possible to estimate the height of all of the mainstays of the franchise. From shortest to tallest: a Goomba is 72 cm (2'4"); a Boo is 79 cm (2'7"); Baby Mario is 89 cm (2'11"); Baby Luigi is 90 cm (2'11"); a Shy Guy is 100 cm (3'3"); Toad, Toadette, and Toadsworth are 103 cm (3'5"); Diddy and Dixie Kong (on their knuckles) are 113 cm (3'8"); a Koopa Troopa is 120 cm (3'11"); a Dry Bones is 124 cm (4'1"); Bowser Jr. is 131 cm (4'4"); a Hammer Bro. is 142 cm (4'8"); a Bullet Bill is 148 cm (4'10") long and 96 cm (3'2") in diameter; a Wiggler is 159 cm (5'3") tall (not including the flower) and who knows how long; Wario and Birdo are 170 cm (5'7") (Birdo is 196 cm [6'5"] if you include her bow); Luigi and Yoshi are 175 cm (5'9"); Lakitu (including cloud) is 179 cm (5'10"); Daisy is 180 cm (5'11"); Donkey Kong (on his knuckles) and Peach (!) are 186 cm (6'1"); Waluigi (with his knees bent a bit) is 216 cm (7'1"); Bowser is 262 cm (8'7"); and Petey Piranha is a whopping 389 cm (12'9"). Normal Piranha Plants seem to vary in height depending on how long their bodies are, but the diameter of their heads is about 111 cm (3'8"). Now for the even harder part, character ages. When it comes to Jr.'s age and that of the Koopalings, I used their first game appearance as their birth year and added till now, this is why Jr. is 15 as Super Mario Sunshine came out 15 years ago and it's his first game. I'll explain why his age and his appearance don't seem to match later on, but after words I hope it'll make sense to you like it does to me.
If there are any questions, feel free to ask.