Author's Note: I've been playing Mario games since he was "Jumpman" in Donkey Kong, so there's a lot of info from the games, books, toys, and anything else Nintendo makes with him. I understand the Super Mario Movie and cartoons are not canon, but I do use some of the cartoon lore in here for filler info. Also, according to Shigeru Miyamoto, Mario's creator, Mario is 5'1'' and 25 years old, such info I have used to make more sense of less profiled characters. So knowing this, please don't freak out about certain characters being so-so feet tall and so-so years old. I mean, if that stuff freaks you out then, spoiler alert, Mario is not a plumber anymore and I will make note of it in the story. Timeline wise, I'm placing this before the Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga + Bowser's Minions, Super Mario Odyssey, and Mario Party: The Top 100 games, those I have yet to properly think of ways to intergrade into this story, plus most of those games haven't even been released yet. But enough of me rambling, you want to lose yourself in a story, so here it is. Enjoy. ^_^ (So I've thought about where I'm placing this story in the grand scheme of the Mario timeline and I believe I've picked a good spot. I've decided that this story will take place before Mario+Rabbids and Odyssey, setting things up to correspond with both those games in a way that'll make sense...I hope.)
Kamek cleared some of the random air of "what the fuck just happened" that went down. Apparently, as a backup to this crazy plot to propose to Peach thing, they hired Doopliss the Duplighost. A Duplighost is a very odd entity. They are very gifted in enchantments and hexes, magic seemingly makes up their being. Their major ability is to transform into different people. By doing this, they can actually steal the real person's look and name, leaving them as shadows of who they once were. When they assume the victim's form, the victim is unable to tell anyone their real name. It is said that these specters can only truly become the person they've duplicated by defeating the original one, but no one really knows for sure. This is not always the case, as some Duplighosts can transform into others without them losing their own form. This ability is commonly attributed to all Duplighosts. Even weirder is the odd source of where their power lies, and that would be their names. A Duplighosts magic is broken by telling them their true name. It's stated that there always has to be at least one being knowing a Duplighosts true name; otherwise, they cannot exist. Why this is no one knows. But from the way this one was used in this staged "death" scene, I can tell why they hired him. A Duplighost capable of mimicking the Mario Brothers and then being able to fake their deaths is a genius move in mentally crushing Peach. It will be very hard for her to not surrender to Bowser now, now that she believes there is no hope of rescue coming to her aid. This interestingly creative move all but assures success for the great Koopa King.
Speaking of mental states that Peach is involved in...I had made quite the scene. I had attempted to kill a Princess. I was going to take a knife and plunge it into her with no regret or remorse. I owed a reason for my actions. And I told the reason as best I could. I tried to say what happened in the nightmare but with less detail. But it's hard to not show what happened was far worse than I say when I start to shake or my voice cracks and I fight not to cry. The kids keep me calm for the most part. But after a bit, Bowser allows me to have a break to get back to normal. I refused and stated I was fine, yet it's hard to fight back when I was just about to stab Peach. So here I am in the lounge and trying to clear my head. But I'm far from alone. The kids go about their own fun, though Jr. and Roy keep close. And by that, I mean, I've got Jr. on my back as Roy has me lay across his chest as he lays on the sofa. Bowser too is here and watching over things. I asked why and he just said he had nothing better to do after the whole proposal thing. I'm fine with it though. He needs to spend more time with the kids anyway. It's important to make strong bonds with your children. Even if they're not entirely yours.
"Ya okay there, sugar?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"Ya had this thousand mile stare goin' on. Wasn't sure if ya were zonin' out or stuck in a bad thought."
"Just emptying my head, dear."
"Ya know, you can take a snooze on me if ya want. I don't mind bein' your pillow."
"I know. And it's sweet of you to offer."
"Mama, don't go to sleep. I want to spend time with you."
Jr. tugs on my hair. It's been a while since he last did that. Still stings just the same.
"I didn't say I was, sweetie. I'm just trying to relax."
"Haven't you relaxed enough? How long do you need to?"
He bounces on my back and I'm starting to regret not putting on my shell.
"Hey squirt, come here. I got a mission for ya."
I cock my brow at Roy and Jr. shakes his head.
"Nope. I'm not moving. I'm staying with Mama."
"Not even if it's for her?"
I'm now even more curious and Jr. looks at him funny.
"Is this a trick?"
"Nah. I'm not gonna trick ya. Now come here. I gotta whisper it so she doesn't hear it."
"Why?"
"Because it's a top-secret mission. That's why."
Roy is up to something, that much I know. What exactly that is, I have no clue. But Jr. ends up taking this bait of his and slips off me. He moves over to Roy and the big lug mutters something to his younger brother that has the boy snickering.
"What did you tell him?"
"Nothin', sugar. Don't worry about it."
"Yeah. No worries, Mama."
Jr. walks away and actually leaves the room, which has me very confused.
"There...That outta buy ya some time without the squirt buggin' ya."
"Roy? What did you do?"
He smirks and pets my head.
"I told the runt that if he wanted ya to feel better than he needed to get ya your favorite thing to eat or drink."
"But...He doesn't know what that is. None of you do. I don't even have a favorite anything."
"Exactly."
"...You're an evil genius."
"Ya say that like that's somethin' new."
I giggle and nuzzle him a bit.
"Now take it easy, sweetheart. No stupid Peach is gonna mess with ya while I'm around."
"Thank you, Roy..."
I kiss his snout.
"You're my hero."
He smiles and continues to pet me, moving his hand down my back to get me purring. Roy really isn't all that bad as a boyfriend. He's sweet, protective, and very affectionate that sometimes borders on overly bold. Yet he has these sweet moments I can't help but indulge in. Maybe that alone time at Bubblaine will do us some good. Not that he would mind. I get the feeling he'd love to see me in a swimsuit. Crap, I don't even have a swimsuit. Double crap, what if he wants to get me one as a surprise? What if it's a bikini? I can't rock a bikini, my shyness and self-consciousnesses won't let me. No, no, no! This isn't good. This isn't good at all.
Roy watched as the gears in her began turning in their odd little way. He often wondered what went on in that head of hers. How often did she think of him? Was it as much as he did of her? Were her thoughts as interesting as his? Probably not in the same way as his. And boy, his thoughts, they were not meant to leave his head. But who knows. Maybe one day they could leave is mind if she allowed them to. Because if he played these boyfriend cards right, he'd be able to really enjoy the perks of having her.
From afar, Ludwig watches the scene and sighs to himself. He had been pinning over the girl for the longest time, but the recent events have burst his hopeful bubble. He had even gone out of his way to write a song that would convey his feelings. Yet now such an effort seems to be in vain. Even Morton, who had been very clingy in the beginning to the girl, has since let things go the way that the course seemed to be playing out because he too failed to make a stronger claim. Now he just watches like a wolf scouting deer, sure he can come in and take her, but it's far better to strike at the best moment, like when the big buck does something to push doe away. To that, Ludwig had to give Morton credit. Morton is not known for being smart, yet even he had these moments that surprised the group. But still, Ludwig put his heart into the piece and it would be a shame if such art went wasted. He just needed to wait for the right time, the right opportunity, to present it to her and let it speak that which he couldn't.
Bowser glances at the pair from time to time. It was weird for him to envy his son at this moment. They looked so cozy. He could easily see himself in Roy's place, being all chill with her laying on him. Wouldn't be the first time though, all those sleepy cuddles were now haunting him mockingly. How he wanted that back. Those moments with her. The tenderness. The kindness. The pure loving care. He longed for that to be his once more. But he meant those words he told Roy. He wasn't going to pursue her so long as Roy was trying. Yet as it would seem and he'd hate to admit, Roy was in the very least trying to hold her favor in this courtship. Whether or not she is really into him or simply humoring the boy till he loses interest is unknown to him, but knowing her, he has doubts on the latter guess. Still, with this wedding nonsense now drawing near, it was going to be far harder to say "I do" to a woman he at this point wanted to chuck into the nearest lava pit. Marrying Peach...The idea now fills him with dread. The second the vows are said and ring seals the deal, she's being put out of all of their misery.
"King dad..."
"Oh, yes, Morton?"
"Do we have to call the Peach lady 'mom'?"
Bowser scoffs.
"Oh god, no. No. Just so much no on that."
"Then what do we call her?"
Larry chimes in.
"Call her whatever you like. It doesn't matter. She won't be here much longer for it to mean anything."
"What does that mean?"
Wendy asks.
"What it means is..."
"You intend to kill her once the wedding is done, don't you?"
Iggy was always the smart one of the bunch. Bowser merely shrugs.
"Peach isn't really 'Queen' material. And I think we all know I can do better."
"Like Lynn mom?"
Bowser's cheeks faintly light up with color and he felt there was no point to denying things.
"Yeah. Someone like her would be nice. Totally would make her my queen."
"Then why don't you?"
Ludwig spoke and by the look on his face, he hadn't meant to voice that thought aloud. Oddly enough, while Roy was able to hear what was said, Lynsie was lost in her thoughts to the point she wasn't really there and heard nothing.
"Ya wanna repeat that again, bro?"
Ludwig decides to make a choice, either he can keep his mouth shut or throw caution to the wind. He chooses the latter.
"I said, why shouldn't our father marry the maiden. Him and her would make a better pair than her and you."
Roy growls.
"What?!"
This gets the girl's attention.
"What's happening?"
"Nothin' sugar. Ya just stay put while I kick the shell out of this annoyin' nerd."
"Wait, what?"
Bowser intervenes.
"There will be no shell kicking of any kind."
She takes this opportunity to remove herself from Roy as the boy himself got up and Jr. returned to the room empty-handed.
"Like shell I'm gonna let that slide! Ya got somethin' to say, bro? Then say it to my face."
"Roy, dear, calm down."
Ludwig scoffs.
"Please. I have nothing to say to you. Her, on the other hand..."
"Kids, knock it off. Don't you think there's been enough going on today? A fight isn't happening on my watch."
"Father, I have no intentions of fighting."
"*scoff* Speak for your self, dork."
"I am, you imbecilic scoundrel."
Roy snarls and takes a step till her hands hold his arm in restraint.
"You promised...No more fighting."
"But..."
"Please..."
Roy huffs a few times before sighing.
"This. This is why you're good for me. Ya keep me from doin' dumb stuff."
"I try, dear."
Roy puts his arm around her and starts walking her off with the girl.
"Where are you two going?"
Roy just smirks at his father.
"To my room. I've got somethin' special to give my sugar. Ya got a problem with that, pops?"
Bowser didn't like hearing that. He wanted to object. To tell him "no, you can't do that". But he had no right to. This was the boy's courtship, not his. If something happens, then it is up to her to shut it down, not him. Bowser concedes defeat.
"No. Do as you wish."
This earns him an odd look from her that has him regretting giving in as Roy leaves the room with her. Thinking for a moment, Bowser turns to his young heir. The boy can be quite useful.
"Jr..."
"Papa?"
"Follow them. Listen to what is said. Be a ninja. Okay?"
"Like a spy?"
"Exactly."
The young Prince snickers wickedly.
"Okay, Papa. I understand."
Jr. proceeds to wait a little bit before sneaking after the pair. Iggy makes the first comment.
"You have an attachment to her, don't you?"
Bowser remains silent and looking out to the door where they left. All but confirming evidence to Iggy.
"I knew it."
"What do you mean, you knew it?"
Larry asks.
"Isn't it obvious?"
Wendy interjects.
"There's been a romantic triangle going on for, like, ages now. Well, a sort of square if Ludwig is still wistfully thinking he has a shot."
When their eyes turn to their elder sibling, Ludwig blushes and tries to throw attention elsewhere.
"M-Me? What about Morton?"
"Don't point blame at Morton. Morton only likes the Lynn lady as just a cuddle buddy."
"Then why do you look at her like you're about to steal her?"
"Because she owes Morton cuddles and everyone always hogs her. How can Morton get cuddles if everyone always taking Lynn lady's time? It's not fair."
Morton pouts and attention goes back to Ludwig.
"I swear, I don't..."
"Ludwig, I'm standing right here. Did you already forget the very lengthy chat we had about this very subject? About how if you wanted her to know how you feel, you have to actually tell her. Ring any bells?"
Ludwig looks off before sighing.
"Fine, yes. I do carry a torch for the maiden. But I can be removed from that shape you stated. My chances of courtship have since past me by."
"I don't know. You still look like a strung up boy. I'm marking you down as a weak corner."
"Do not mark me as anything!"
"Too late."
Larry and Lemmy share looks, they always tend to be left out in these odd moments.
"Do you get what they're saying?"
"A little bit."
"What was it then?"
"Roy likes Lynn. Dad likes her too. Ludwig also likes her but he's giving up. And Morton just likes cuddles."
"Well, yeah. Cuddles are awesome."
"Yeah, they are."
"This is kind of boring. *gasp* We should follow Jr.. No way what he's doing is boring."
"You read my mind. Come on."
The boys leave and, even though they passed by right in front of Bowser's line of sight, the King doesn't even notice them as they go. The remaining children seem to bicker further about this romantic storyline that's been going on in their lives. Piecing together little clues that they've noticed over time. But the King heard not a word of it. His mind too lost in the thoughts of what Roy can be doing with his spitfire.
No, don't think like that. She isn't property. She isn't yours. This is exactly what she was talking about. You messed up, remember? Had you just not slapped her, she'd still be here for you. Now you're getting hitched to Peach and Roy's making sure she's farther from you than before. How will you get her back? If the boy fails that is. Maybe it's for the best. What kind of man strikes the woman he claims to love? A dumbass, that's for sure. He didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve that love he felt when with her. Yet he wanted it. He wanted it more than anything. And that look she gave as Roy took her away. It was almost like she was disappointed. Disappointed that he didn't even try to fight for her. Disappointed that after everything, he just gave up. Could she really still care for a fool like him? How he hoped so.
[Meanwhile: in Roy's room]
Not long after stepping into Roy's room, he locked the door and captured my lips in a slightly frenzied kiss that caught me off guard. Roy has a tendency of doing that to me. And he also likes to use this to his advantage. This time, he's managed to lift me off my feet and pinned me to said door. Making me feel rather shocked for two reasons. One, because I'm surprised by his actions and two, because it oddly is slightly thrilling when he gets all heated like this. Makes him feel dangerous in a tame way. I like it.
"*purrs* What's got into you, tough guy?"
"What's the matter, sugar? Not havin' fun~?"
"I didn't say that. But I doubt your big surprise is just making out with me."
"Nah, I got somethin' better for ya. But this ain't bad for a start~."
Roy trails kisses along my shoulders then brings his mouth down on my neck and I flinch at the memory of what happened last time when he did this.
"Roy, please...Not another hickey. The first one is still forming."
He merely smirks with a smugly deep rumble and nips tenderly, making me squirm. Damn my sensitive spot. Damn him for finding out about it. He bites down and sucks hard to make a very large mark. The shameful moan that escapes me to fill his ears has him grinning and I clasp his shell to hold something so I don't lose myself completely.
"*muffled* I love ya...Every little thing ya do...Every sound ya make...I want more...I want you..."
"*whimper* R-Roy...Don't..."
He pauses upon hearing that.
"Sugar? You okay?"
"You're moving too fast..."
I look away while blushing.
"It feels weird."
"Ya want me to stop?"
"If that's okay."
"Sure...No problem, sweetheart."
He lets me go and I hug him quickly.
"Thank you."
"Eh, no biggie, sugar. Heh, I just got caught up in the moment. Sorry if it made ya uncomfortable."
"It's okay. We're new to this. Still learning things and about each other. It's what happens when trying to start a relationship."
He smiles.
"Oh? So we are a thing?"
I snicker.
"You're playing your cards right. You might get that wish, tough guy."
"Then how about I play my next hand? You want my gift?"
"As long as it's nothing extreme."
"So a ring would be too much?"
I pale and he laughs.
"I'm kiddin'. I'm kiddin'. Man...*snickers* You should see the look on your face."
I push him back and fold my arms.
"That's not funny."
"Easy, sugar. My bad. But for real, I didn't get ya any jewelry. Ya don't seem like the type that would wear anything flashy for long."
"You figure me out too easy. But you're not wrong. I can't deal with the over the top bobbles like Wendy or the Princesses."
"That's what I like about ya. You're not all girly and junk. Yet...I might have broken down for this and learned a little somethin' that might make the lady in ya swoon."
I cock my brow.
"What did you do?"
He offers me his hand.
"I learned how to waltz."
"...For real?"
"Would I lie about somethin' so lame?"
I snort a laugh and take his hand.
"No. You wouldn't."
He smiles and pulls me close.
"Ya know how to dance, sweet cheeks?"
"Honestly? Not a clue."
"It's fine. Just follow my lead."
"Alright. But what's a dance without some music?"
"*snort* Babe, I got tunes. Just gotta turn on the system."
He snaps his fingers and his stereo comes to life.
"Oooh. Fancy."
"Ya ain't seen nothin' yet, sweetheart."
The music kicks on and he moves my hands to hold him before he takes hold of me.
"Watch my feet if ya need to."
"Okay."
The beat picks up and a song begins to play. He takes a few steps and I try to keep pace.
" If I had the money, let me tell you how it'd be. I'd take over the country, everyone would bow to me. Sit up in my palace, and baby you would be my queen. We'd run this ship together, just you wait and see...We'll be royalty...We'll be royalty...I know, I know, I know...I know we're broke right now. Girl, I guarantee that I will work this out. Yeah, see I've got this plan. Are you in or out? I need to understand. Trips to Rio, five-star meals. Girl, don't quit on me now. If I gotta beg or steal, no big deal. Oh, let me break it down. If I had the money, let me tell you how it'd be. I'd take over the country, everyone would bow to me. Sit up in my palace, and baby you would be my queen. We'd run this ship together, just you wait and see...We'll be royalty...We'll be royalty...We'll be royalty...We'll be royalty... "
"Interesting song choice."
"Not bad, right?"
"You have good taste, Roy."
"Well, yeah. I choose you."
"Awww..."
" So would you cover me? If I gotta take out any enemy, yeah? Cause it might get ugly. Planning things that you don't wanna see in here. You're 'bout to party with stars, fancy cars. Girl, don't quit on me now. If I've gotta rob or steal, no big deal. This is how we'll do it. If I had the money, let me tell you how it'd be. I'd take over the country, everyone would bow to me. Sit up in my palace, and baby you would be my queen. We'd run this ship together, just you wait and see...We'll be royalty...And I'll be the king baby...We'll be sitting on a throne...We'll be sitting on a throne, you and me, all alone...Ain't no stopping us now, hey... "
"Ya know...For a girl that said she can't dance, ya really aren't that bad."
"Flattery is unnecessary."
"No, I mean it. Ya picked up on this fast and haven't even stepped on my toes."
"I'm only doing good because I'm following you."
"Now who's flatterin'?"
"You, you silly Koopa."
" We'll be royalty. So who d'you trust, girl its ride or die. We'll be royalty. So pack your stuff, let's take this to the sky. We'll be royalty. So who d'you trust, girl its ride or die. We'll be royalty. So pack your stuff, let's take this to the sky. We'll be royalty. "
The song ends as Roy twirlers me around a bit and finishes in his arms. He stares at me for a moment while another tune begins to play, but we do not dance to it. He presses his forehead to my own and I smile softly.
"It's amazing."
"What is?"
"That you can be so strong and tough while at the same time be the sweetest boy ever."
He blushes a bit from that.
"Ah, sugar...Ya gotta warn a guy before ya say somethin' like that."
"How come?"
"'Cause...It's hard to be cool when ya say somethin' so cute."
"Awww...Come here, tough guy."
I give this hardcore softy a kiss and he gladly returns it with gusto. It starts out as a playful little reward for him being so sweet to me. Yet it doesn't stay that way. He adds a bit more passion to it, holding me tight and dipping me slightly.
"Mmmm...You really weren't kidding about the swoon thing."
"That's the Koopa charm, sugar. And it's all for you~."
"Awww..."
We proceed to dance for a few more songs. Really enjoying the moment. Or at least, that was what I was doing. It's not every day that I can just forget myself in a mindless activity like this. Well, I could, but that wouldn't be fair to the kids. I can't be an absentminded caretaker. Especially to royalty such as them. So when I'm able to mentally get lost, I tend to really enjoy it before the moment drifts away. Roy on the other hand, he never stops looking for moments that he can take advantage of. So when he senses that my guard is completely down, he begins to put a plan into motion. His steps lead me around the room in a disorientating spin that gets me dizzy rather easy. This is then followed by him moving to be on the bed and him pulling me on top of him.
"Roy?"
"Yeah?"
"What are you doing?"
"Nothin', sweet cheeks. Just wanted to be close to ya is all."
"Okay...But no funny stuff."
"Babe. Come on. Would I ever do somethin' so lame as to mess this up?"
"No...But..."
"Relax, sweetheart. I got ya. Trust me. I ain't gonna do anythin' to make ya uncomfortable."
"Alright. I trust you."
"Good. Now, how's about ya give me some more sugar, sugar~."
I giggle as he captures my lips with his and I'm under his charming spell with ease.
Outside the room is a different scene altogether. Jr., Larry, and Lemmy huddle around Roy's bedroom door. Trying to listen in on anything their tiny ears could pick up. Unfortunately, the music wasn't helping.
"Do you hear anything?"
"Nope."
"All I hear is that dumb music."
"I know, right? He's got no taste."
"Guys, hush. You can't be good spies if you're talking more than you're listening."
"What's there to listen to?"
"Yeah. I bet they're not even talking."
"Probably being all gross and kissing."
"Oh Roy, you smooch so good~."
"You too, sugar~."
Larry and Lemmy make kissing sounds which cause Jr. to growl.
"Will you two knock it off?! Mama is not like that!"
They immediately stop.
"Sorry, Jr.."
"We didn't mean to make you mad."
"We're just really bored."
"We do goofy stuff when bored."
"That wasn't goofy. That's my Mama. Don't make fun of my Mama."
They lower their heads.
"We're sorry."
They say in unison.
"It's fine. Just...Don't do it again."
"We promise."
"No more saying weird stuff about the Lynn mom."
"Thank you."
"Oh my god!"
The sudden shout got their attention and when the door latch began to rattle harshly they were quick to move away. The door flings open and Lynsie bolts out, now once more wearing her shell.
"Too fast, Roy! Too freaking fast!"
She takes off as Roy stumbles to the doorway, his shades are off and the air knocked out of him.
"*wheeze* Sugar wait...*gasp* I didn't mean it...*coughing* I'm sorry...*hoarse* Come back!"
The three younger boys mere stare in confusion as Roy, unaware of their being nearby, catches his breath before he drops to his knees in guilt.
"#%*&$...#%*&$...I messed up...I messed up so bad..."
"What did you do?"
Lemmy blows their cover and Larry covers his brother's mouth in vain. It's too late to hide and Jr. knows it. This won't end well for the no-longer undercover spies. Roy doesn't look at them. He keeps his back to them and snarls viciously, a stark contrast from the weakened worry he was seconds ago.
"*growls* Ya got five seconds to leave. I won't warn ya twice."
Considering what happened the last time Roy lost his temper, they don't question or think of talking back. They back away slowly before hightailing it away. It was best to run away. Fighting a disgruntled Roy is not a smart move. Besides, they have information to pass on to Bowser about all this craziness.
Now sure that he was alone, the rage Roy held gave out with little effort. He is not one to show any of the softer emotions, as is the tough guy way. But at this moment, his heart broke along with every wall he made in his soul, and he let loose a wail in anguish as the tears began to flow.
" I walk along the avenue. I never thought I'd meet a girl like you. Meet a girl like you. With auburn hair and tawny eyes. The kind of eyes that hypnotize me through. You hypnotize me through. And I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran. I ran all night and day. I couldn't get away. "
Of course the stereo was still on and seemed to be set to ironic tunes. The sounds of his pain will forever haunt Castle Koopa. Joining along the past cries of his father and many others before him.
" A cloud appears above your head. A beam of light comes shining down on you. Shining down on you. The cloud is moving nearer still. Aurora Borealis comes in view. Aurora comes in view. And I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran. I ran all night and day. I couldn't get away. "
His fists slam into the floor, cracking the stone. His body demanded he move. To go after her. To not let her go. But his heart was too heavy in sadness and guilt. He couldn't move. He couldn't do a thing.
" Reached out a hand to touch your face. You're slowly disappearing from my view. Clearing from my view. Reached out a hand to try again. I'm floating in a beam of light with you. A beam of light with you. And I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran. I ran all night and day. And I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran. I couldn't get away. "
[Meanwhile: Inside Castle Seven]
Somehow, they had managed the impossible. On the razor's edge the whole way in this journey and now they stand on the very cusp of the end. The only thing that stands in the way of the Mario Brothers now is what lies beyond the door at the end of this deathtrap of a castle. Whatever it is that awaits them in that final room, it will surely be worth all this hell. They do a final health check, get their limited items ready, and then push open the door. As with most of the boss rooms they've entered, all is quiet and it appears empty. Yet like those other times before, the moment the door closes, the lights turn on. A slow rumble shakes the floor. As it gets stronger, the floor in the back starts to open. Slowly a familiar looking form begins to emerge, yet this was far larger and more metal than this Koopa tended to be.
"Are you-a kidding me."
"What is it, Mario?"
"Mecha-Bowser."
"Oh...Wait, what?!"
Mecha-Bowser, a huge Bowser-shaped robot that can be controlled from within the head. In the past, this mechanical monster has been less of a threat and more of an annoyance, as well as being less finely put together. It used to emit a lot of sparks and its body parts seem to be badly attached like it was put together in a rush. But not this one. This one was clearly put together with care and given a much-needed upgrade. It didn't have the normal Bowser paint job but the stainless steel shine made it more menacing. The gleam of those claws, the sheen of those teeth, and the glare in those eyes. Chilling.
"Mama mia..."
"Who do you-a think is piloting it?"
"Probably just-a some minion."
"I AM NOT A MINION!"
The oddly female voice cracks out of the metal beast's mouth. This confuses the brothers till the hair parts and out stands what seems to be a very out of place pirate.
"If you boys think I'm just another run of the mill pushover, then you have another thing coming."
This was her. The one Dunk and Shoot call boss, Captain Syrup. Syrup wears a light purple top with two loops at each shoulder, a large red belt with a white skull buckle, and knee-length purple puffy pants with torn leg openings. Her boots are purple with light bottoms and a pink roll-over ankle. She has light-purple wraps with long strands on her wrists and a light purple bandanna wraps the top of her head. Her accessories include a tooth-like necklace and golden octopus earrings. She appears to be a very tall and developed woman. Her hair is long, curly, and kind of red or reddish-brown. Her eyes are a reddish-orange in hue, has on light-sea blue eyeshadow, and pink rose lipstick. Queen of the seas, that's what her appearance screams.
"You boys got here sooner than expected. Sorry to tell you this, but your Princess is in another castle."
The brothers groan loudly.
"I thought I'd never hear those words again."
"Kill me-a. Just kill me-a now."
She smirks.
"Tempting. But I have my orders. Bowser paid a good price to ensure that not only do I stop you, but...I get to have some fun in making sure you don't ever leave this place...alive that is."
"You're-a rather confident for a woman that's never fought us before. But then again, anyone can-a feel strong with a big toy like that."
She glares.
"I don't need this thing to beat you. I've made men like you regret ever being born."
"Yeah, yeah. I get it. You're-a the kind of girl that wanted to tick off her folks and ran with the wrong crowd, only to take it over while forgetting why you-a did it in the first place. Stop me-a when I hit the nail on the head."
She sneers harshly and glares daggers at Mario.
"Mario, that's no way to speak to a lady. What would ma say if she knew how far your-a manners have slipped?"
Mario scoffs.
"Where do you-a see a lady?"
Syrup becomes angry enough to scream, but she doesn't get the chance. A sudden explosion goes off and the ceiling above cracks open, dropping in two screaming nincompoops. Wario and Waluigi land on their heads but are otherwise fine. She composes herself and waves to the Parakoopas that dropped them off so to speak.
"It's about time you two showed up."
The bad boys dust themselves off and look around.
"Well I'll be a Goomba's uncle...That flying shroom wasn't lying. That lizard really hired you."
"Good to see you too, handsome. How have you been?"
"Still ticked off that you stole from me. But I can let that slide..."
Wario cracks his knuckles and faces the Mario Brothers.
"Work comes first."
Syrup looks at the unfamiliar purple man.
"Who's your friend?"
Waluigi look upon this woman and all thought leaves him as his head is filled with sultry saxophone music. Wario sees this and shakes his head in disgust.
"This is Waluigi. He'd had said that himself, but he's currently brain dead."
Waluigi waves timidly and she smiles.
"Hey there, good looking. Are you here to help me beat up these naughty boys?"
He nods excitedly.
"Thanks, hun."
She winks as she blows him a kiss and Waluigi heats up enough to make his mustache straighten. Wario punches his buddy in the shoulder.
"Ow! What was that for?"
"You're falling into her trap. Don't be a fool."
Waluigi grumbles while rubbing his shoulder.
"Whatever."
"Get ready boys, because this is when the fun starts."
"Then get it over with already! Stop taking forever like every woman ever and just get to the point!"
Mario's shouting makes the room go dead quiet. Luigi, Wario, and Waluigi move aside as Syrup's eye begins to twitch.
"...I'm going to #%*&$ kill you."
She dives back inside the metal beast and starts it up, giving the malicious monster life with a roar.
"You just-a had to make her mad."
"Bite me. I have a girlfriend to rescue. I don't-a have time to waste talking with this...woman...?"
Mario's words cancel out upon the robot's chest opening up and revealing two rows of five Banzai Bill blaster cannons.
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHO YOU'RE #%*&$ DEALING WITH!"
And she was so right about that. A cunning pirate, a deadly machine, and two arch-rivals all with the intent to destroy them. Well...Mario more than Luigi at this point. But that's up to Waluigi on that.
"Time to finally put you in your place, you arrogant red turd!"
Wario gulps down two full cloves of garlic and his gut rumbles.
"They say keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. I think I'll do that better...When I bury you in my backyard!"
Waluigi slips on some brass knuckles with spiked ends.
"Mario..."
"Yeah?"
"I loath you-a right now."
"I loath me-a too, bro. I loath me-a too."
This was going to be a fight that they actually weren't sure they'd get out of unscathed or at all. But what choice did they have? They have to rescue Peach. No matter what the odds. It's just what they do.
Shoutout to the group Big Bad Bosses (B3) and their song "Princess" for inspiring this scene. In case you're curious, B3 is a video game villain boy band featuring Bowser, Sephiroth, Ganondorf, and Robotnic. I highly recommend you give them a shot and you might even recognize who does their voices. Here's a link to their setlist. I hope you enjoy them and they might make a second album.
youtube playlist?list=PLx6GleNkyUhgS5XXXd_jekiWHVp4Bnq1D (there's a space because ffnet doesn't post links and it'll mess up otherwise)
Just in case there is still some questions to my logic, I'll help clear up a few things. Using the Official Nintendo chart (google super mario bros size chart and it's the first image you see) we can see how tall a lot of them are, though I had to guess height for the Koopalings based on screen images of them next to each other, plus Mario and Luigi. Now the Nintendo-approved statue poster claims it to be "life-sized", thus putting Mario's height at 155 cm (5'1"). Using that information along with this universal size chart, it's possible to estimate the height of all of the mainstays of the franchise. From shortest to tallest: a Goomba is 72 cm (2'4"); a Boo is 79 cm (2'7"); Baby Mario is 89 cm (2'11"); Baby Luigi is 90 cm (2'11"); a Shy Guy is 100 cm (3'3"); Toad, Toadette, and Toadsworth are 103 cm (3'5"); Diddy and Dixie Kong (on their knuckles) are 113 cm (3'8"); a Koopa Troopa is 120 cm (3'11"); a Dry Bones is 124 cm (4'1"); Bowser Jr. is 131 cm (4'4"); a Hammer Bro. is 142 cm (4'8"); a Bullet Bill is 148 cm (4'10") long and 96 cm (3'2") in diameter; a Wiggler is 159 cm (5'3") tall (not including the flower) and who knows how long; Wario and Birdo are 170 cm (5'7") (Birdo is 196 cm [6'5"] if you include her bow); Luigi and Yoshi are 175 cm (5'9"); Lakitu (including cloud) is 179 cm (5'10"); Daisy is 180 cm (5'11"); Donkey Kong (on his knuckles) and Peach (!) are 186 cm (6'1"); Waluigi (with his knees bent a bit) is 216 cm (7'1"); Bowser is 262 cm (8'7"); and Petey Piranha is a whopping 389 cm (12'9"). Normal Piranha Plants seem to vary in height depending on how long their bodies are, but the diameter of their heads is about 111 cm (3'8"). Now for the even harder part, character ages. When it comes to Jr.'s age and that of the Koopalings, I used their first game appearance as their birth year and added till now, this is why Jr. is 15 as Super Mario Sunshine came out 15 years ago and it's his first game. I'll explain why his age and his appearance don't seem to match later on, but after words I hope it'll make sense to you like it does to me.
If there are any questions, feel free to ask.