Author's Note: I've been playing Mario games since he was "Jumpman" in Donkey Kong, so there's a lot of info from the games, books, toys, and anything else Nintendo makes with him. I understand the Super Mario Movie and cartoons are not canon, but I do use some of the cartoon lore in here for filler info. Also, according to Shigeru Miyamoto, Mario's creator, Mario is 5'1'' and 25 years old, such info I have used to make more sense of less profiled characters. So knowing this, please don't freak out about certain characters being so-so feet tall and so-so years old. I mean, if that stuff freaks you out then, spoiler alert, Mario is not a plumber anymore and I will make note of it in the story. Timeline wise, I'm placing this before the Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga + Bowser's Minions, Super Mario Odyssey, and Mario Party: The Top 100 games, those I have yet to properly think of ways to intergrade into this story, plus most of those games haven't even been released yet. But enough of me rambling, you want to lose yourself in a story, so here it is. Enjoy. ^_^ (So I've thought about where I'm placing this story in the grand scheme of the Mario timeline and I believe I've picked a good spot. I've decided that this story will take place before Mario+Rabbids and Odyssey, setting things up to correspond with both those games in a way that'll make sense...I hope.)

I can't stop running. I know he's not chasing me, but I can't stop. Why? Why did you do that, Roy?! I told you no funny stuff. I told you it was too fast. We aren't on the same level. I'm not ready for this! I can't do this! I can't! I'm done! Where's the nearest window?! I need to get out of here! And so I run. I can't stop. Nothing short of a wall can make me stop. I don't even have a direction as to where I'm going. I'm just aimlessly darting through halls. Nothing looks familiar in the blur that is my sight. Stone and fire, that's all I see. Fire. Stone. Stone. Fire. Minion. More stone. More fire. More minions. A door.

*thwack*

I slam face first into an opening door and fall flat on my shell. I give myself a 60% chance of having a broken nose or in the very least a bleeding forehead knowing my luck with getting hit. I just hope the person that opened said door is not anyone that would care about me at this moment.

"Human? What are you doing on the floor?"

Kamek hovers over me and I rub my aching face.

"I smacked the door with my face."

"I know that. But what was the reason?"

"Because I was running."

"And why were you doing a silly thing like that?"

"I wanted to get away."

"From what?"

"Everything."

Kamek lowers himself to the ground and gets off his broom. I make no attempt to move from my spot.

"Are you alright?"

"No."

He looks at me funny.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"...Not here."

"Very well."

Using his broom, he flips me over to my side and I'm able to get back on my feet.

"Come, girl. Tell me about your troubles."

I sigh as he begins walking and I slowly follow his lead. Where he'll take me I don't know. But in the very least, maybe I can get some of this off my chest and feel less likely to want to fly out a window.

[Meanwhile: in the lounge]

It is getting late in the evening and soon the time for sleep will fall upon them. Bowser was beginning to grow more anxious. He had sent the little spies off quite some time ago and curiosity was playing tricks on his mind. What could Roy possibly be doing with her? What would she allow him to do? That girl lets him get away with murder as is. He didn't want to think about the things that she'd allow him to do. The things he'd rather she allow he himself to do. But he knew by now those times were gone. He lost the right to have those moments with her the instant his hand struck her face. He had to face the fact that it was Roy's time. The boy had the right to court her and continue to do so for as long as she deemed him worthy. And as his father, he had to allow Roy to do so. But just because he had to, it didn't mean he liked it. As much as he would be proud of his boy for capturing the heart of such a girl, in the back of his mind he was hoping for the boy to fail so he would once more be able to sway things in his favor. Part of him hated himself for thinking that way. To wish ill on the chances of his child to be happy. And the more he thought about it, the more it made him sick. What kind of parent gets that jealous of their own child's happiness? Him apparently. If only he had a sign. Something to tell him he could stop this self-torment. That he could let this crush die and he could try to move on with his heart.

"Papa!"

Jr., Lemmy, and Larry coming bolting in like they've seen some monster randomly eat Santa.

"Papa!"

"What's wrong? Are you boys okay?"

"We have news!"

"Big news!"

That got everyone's attention.

"How big are we talking here?"

"Roy messed up!"

Lemmy says with all the giddiness of a child wanting to blurt out a secret. But it did have Bowser's interest.

"What do you mean he messed up? Give me details. What happened?"

"We couldn't hear much because Roy had music playing."

"But suddenly Mama came running out of his room and he was upset that he made her flee."

Part of him fought the urge to smirk upon hearing that.

"Do you know what he did?"

The three of them shook their heads no.

"Do you know where she went?"

Again they shook their heads. Great, just great. Look what you did with all your evil wishful thinking. Roy did something bad and now she's somewhere probably lost because that's how ditsy she is. Better go and fix this before it gets any worse for everyone involved.

"Okay...*sigh* Kids, I think it's best you all go to bed now."

The group all whines at once in perfect unison.

"Don't give me that. It's late and I have a mess to fix. So do me a favor and go to bed now. If you do, I'll...um...I'll get you each something you've wanted for your birthday a lot sooner."

They didn't need to be offered twice. They scurry away and he palms his face. Him and his big mouth, making expensive promises just to buy some time. He really needs to stop doing that at some point. For now, though, that will have to wait. His spitfire was somewhere in the castle and if he was able to find her, maybe he'll be able to get back in her good graces once more. His hunt begins now.

[Meanwhile: Kamek's alchemic laboratory]

Kamek brought me to his lab since he was headed there anyway and honestly, it's a really cool place. Gives off this really cool wizard vibe with all the books and potions. So while he's busy and not entirely focused on me, I'm able to prattle on about my issues. I'd be too embarrassed if he was paying complete attention to all this.

"...So I tried to leave but he grabbed my wrist. I panicked. I couldn't hear a word that came out of his mouth. And instinct kicked in. I socked him hard in the gut and ran out of there. I don't know how long I was running for till I face planted into that door. Stars, he's probably beating himself up over this. He's so sensitive when it comes to this stuff. *groan* I hate all this craziness! Why does everything have to be so difficult and confusing? Why can't things stay the way they were in the beginning? When I was just a caretaker and no one was trying to woo me. *sigh* Sometimes...I think it would be better if I just were gone. That I should go back to my old house and my old dull life. Am I a fool for thinking that?"

He's too busy making sure his research is being done correctly to look at me.

"Are you a fool? No. You're just overstressed in a situation you're not used to. Perfectly reasonable."

"What should I do? Do I try to work things out with Roy? Do I stop it? And then there's the whole Bowser thing..."

"Believe me, I know more about that side of things than I care to know."

"He told you about liking me?"

"Yes. And I will admit, I did not approve at first."

"For real?"

"I said at first...I'm not the most trusting of you humans. Which I don't think you had any doubts on that."

I chuckle.

"Yeah, you make it hard not to notice that."

"But you...You are alright. You're not like the other humans we've dealt with. You're honest and respectful. You do what is needed and expected of yourself. I was not happy to hear of his 'attraction' of you, but...You are a better option than what he's used to going after."

I'm not sure how to take that, compliment or insult. I go with the positive.

"Thanks? But that's not really answering any of my problems."

"Well, why not ask yourself what you should do."

I glare at the back of his head.

"If I could answer them why would I bother asking you?"

"Now there's no need for that tone."

"You don't get this. I'm stuck between a spike wall and waterfall of lava. I don't know what I'm supposed to do here. I care about both of them but I don't know what I got to do. They both are on different levels than me. They throw that 'love' word around so easily and I struggle to even utter that I like them. I just..."

I cut myself off and he pauses in his work.

"Human?"

"...I just want them to be happy."

He turns around and actually looks at me.

"But what do you want?"

I look at him funny.

"For them to be happy."

"No, no. You. What do YOU want?"

"For them to..."

"Don't! Say anything but that. Truly ask yourself what it is that YOU want."

I look at the floor.

"You really don't know what you want, do you?"

I shake my head and he sighs while rubbing the bridge of his snout.

"For the love the stars...You can't be that selfless."

"Why not?"

"Why not?! You're alive, aren't you? You have you're own will and needs. Shouldn't you want your own happiness? You have a say in all this. You're more than just a doll that they can use for their own needs."

"I know that. I just...*sigh* I don't know. Knowing they're happy makes me happy. So that's all I really care about. But I'm not able to please everyone all the time. I can't be with both on the same level they expect me to be. I'm not even sure I can even go that far. When affection becomes intimacy..."

"Please! Go no further in that direction."

"Don't worry, I'm not. The idea makes me uncomfortable."

"I see...There's the line in the sand."

He turns his attention back to his work.

"You're afraid of becoming vulnerable by giving up control over that which no one has ever known."

"Okay, Sigmund Kong, you don't have to get all smart about it. Yes, I'm a virgin. I've never been in a relationship. I've never given so much of my trust to someone else. I've never known love. So, yeah, I'm apprehensive about it. I'm defensive about allowing myself to be reliant on someone else. I'm not used to it. It's...It's scary."

"What part of life isn't? We come into this world and are forced into being dependent on strangers we call parents to live. We grow and encounter odd things that only make us confused. But we either can choose to cower from that which we don't know or face it and find out it's nothing to worry about. So it's now time for you to make a choice, human. You can either live in fear of growing emotionally or take control of things and become a better person. Which do you choose?"

I groan and rub my face.

"Obviously I choose the latter. But that still doesn't help me with the current issue of two guys trying to get my heart and I'm too freaking stupid to know who it is I myself like. I'm torn. I'm torn in pieces and they each hold the parts needed to put me back together."

"Well, you were with Roy recently. Why is that?"

"Because after I had them talk things out with each other, Bowser said he was backing down and allowing Roy to have his shot."

That made Kamek flinch.

"He...He said he was backing down? Bowser? Like...He gave up?"

"That's how I reacted! It's so un-Bowser to just cave in and submit. I have no doubt in my mind that he's doing this because of parental reasons, but his feelings are still there. I know they are. I can still see it in his eyes when he looks at me."

"And how does that make you feel?"

"It's complicated. Bowser just...He feels good to be around. Without trying we click in this nice buddy way. He's a great man and he deserves to be happy. For all that he's done, he should know joy like anyone else. But all the Peach stuff...I don't want to be near that woman. And in small ways, I know she still has some part of him. I mean, he doesn't need to marry her to take the Mushroom Kingdom. Just kill her and take everything in the resulting chaos. Don't tie yourself to that devil woman. So why? Why go through with it? Why are you going to marry her if you don't have to, you big dork?"

Kamek stops his work again to face me. My voice began to hold sadness and anger. He doesn't need an upset woman raging in his lab.

"You know his reason. He wants to break her. To crush her like she has done him so many times before."

"Then he shouldn't have told me that he loves me!"

Tears are starting to pool and slip out.

"Tell me after. Tell me after she's gone and all is done. Not before. Don't make me fall for you and then make me watch you marry another woman. If you care as much as you tell me that you do, don't hurt me like that. I don't deserve that. I do so much for him. I take care of his kids. I support his plans. I wore a freaking dress and kidnapped that harpy for him. And what's the reward I get for being a good person? I'm told he loves me and that he's marrying Peach. I just...I just can't deal with that. I just can't."

I'm fighting the need to cry but the tears still fall. Kamek on his end is taken back by my rather emotional outburst. He's not used to seeing it from anyone, let alone, the normally cheerful human.

"Do you need a moment?"

"*sniffle* I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

I shoot him a stern look and he steps back a bit.

"Okay...Moving on. How does Roy make you feel?"

I wipe my face dry.

"Hard to say. Roy is sweet and caring..."

"We are talking about Roy, right?"

"At least, he's that way to me. He tries so hard to make me like him. He learned to waltz for me. We danced and he made my heart swell. He's been honest with me from the very start and sees no other girl but me. He's the guy I wish I knew when I was younger. I could've grown up with him and fell for him over time. Nice and slow. Not like how he's doing it now. All fast and rough, like riding a bike with no shocks at top speed down a very bumpy mountain. I try to apply breaks when things get too crazy but it sometimes makes the bike crash. ...Does that make any of the sense it did in my head?"

Kamek's eye twitches a bit behind his glasses. Some things are better left unsaid.

"I did not mean for any of that to sound naughty, I swear."

"I understood what you meant. Just...Really wasn't expecting all this when I first offered to listen to your problems."

"I did tell you I wasn't okay. That's a warning of heavy junk that's bothering me."

"I'll make a note of that."

"But you see my problem, right? I care about both of them and yet there are these moments in our interactions that have made me reconstruct the walls that keep them at bay on an emotional level."

"Aside from what you told me Roy did, I doubt his majesty did anything as bad as..."

"He hit me."

That stole the words from his mouth.

"Oh..."

"Kammy had to heal the damage that came after. It wasn't pretty. My face was gnarly and actually stuck to the pillow I slept on."

"Please, I don't need details."

"I don't know what to do, Kamek. At this rate, I'm going to drive myself insane trying to figure out what I should do to the point I'm going to break down mentally. How do I choose between the one that will over do it to have me as his personal queen and the one that glorifies me while making another his bride?"

Kamek removes his spectacles and cleans them on his robe in thought.

"Well?"

He puts them back on.

"I have no clue."

I hang my head and sigh.

"That doesn't help."

"Sorry. But you got yourself into a mess that I have no idea on what would be needed to fix it. Two males like you and you are the factor that determines which of the two gets you, for lack of better words, as a prize. Because, let's face it, one of them isn't coming out of this happy."

"And that's something I don't want to happen."

"Which is why you're stuck. You're trying to please all of the people all of the time. But that can't be done."

"*groan* If only there were two of me."

"Well..."

That has me look up at him.

"Well, what?"

"...There is a power-up item that his highness found while he invaded the Sprixie Kingdom."

"The cat bell?"

"Besides that one. It's called the Double Cherry. When used, a clone of the user appears. The clones keep the user's state, for example, if you were using a Fire Flower then so would the clone, and they all move identically to the user. From what we've studied, there can be up to five clones at one time. If another Double Cherry is used when five clones exist, a Coin will appear instead."

"Really? How strong are the copies? The same as the original?"

"The clones disintegrate if harmed like any other transformation power-up. Also, others can steal the double power from someone using it if the original is hit with a Ground Pound."

"Wait, they move identically to the original? So they have no will of their own?"

"No. It's pretty much like a shadow copy. You move your arm, the clone does the same, and so on."

"Dang...That almost was a thing. Any other power-ups you can think of?"

"Not sure. Currently, I am working on a recipe for a new one."

"Oh?"

"This old text describes it as something along the lines of the caps that allows whoever possessing it to change their appearance and abilities to the cap's inspirational owner. However, the voice will remain unchanged so it's not a complete change."

"Really?"

I move closer to check it out.

"How close is it to completion?"

"Not long. But I will need a tester."

I shrug.

"Sure. I could use the distraction. What is it called?"

"The text is a bit iffy on that, but it roughly translates to 'Super Crown'."

"Huh...Neat."

[Meanwhile: roaming the castle halls]

Apparently finding a runaway girl is a lot harder than Bowser first thought. In fact, he was starting to have flashbacks to when she ran off and was found sleeping in a broom closet. But unlike last time, she wasn't in the closet and his search area had far fewer people looking. Just him. Him alone searching room to room for his little spitfire. And in a castle with just about a hundred rooms, it's taking a long time. He was looking in all the places he knew that she knew of. The garden, nope. The kitchen, nope. The indoor pool, wait, he hadn't shown her that yet. The treasure room, not there either but still worth a shot. Peach's room, not a trace of the woman he wanted. Yet when all felt lost, he finally got some clues. A few of the cleaning staff have caught sight of her galloping like a panicked mare in frenzy. Not really the clearest of clues to go on. But following the direction that they point out has him finding a minion that gave him actual directions. This one tells him of the human being lead by Kamek to a place he himself doesn't often remember even exists in his home, Kamek's laboratory. And here is where he has been standing on the outside of like a nervous child ever since his ears managed to hear her voice. His adviser and his love were having a chat he had hoped would not be brought up outside of their relationship. But the more she spoke, the more he understood why she was telling Kamek all this. She's conflicted and confused. She just wants them to be happy. Hearing her say that over and over again had him wanting to rip the door off its hinges to get to her. But then...

"Then he shouldn't have told me that he loves me!"

That had him frozen on the spot.

"Tell me after. Tell me after she's gone and all is done. Not before. Don't make me fall for you and then make me watch you marry another woman. If you care as much as you tell me that you do, don't hurt me like that. I don't deserve that. I do so much for him. I take care of his kids. I support his plans. I wore a freaking dress and kidnapped that harpy for him. And what's the reward I get for being a good person? I'm told he loves me and that he's marrying Peach. I just...I just can't deal with that. I just can't."

His heart sank deeper than the pirate ship in Jolly Roger Bay. She continued to talk with Kamek but he heard none of it. She held in so much more than he would've guessed. But why? Why didn't she tell him any of this? Why is she opening up to Kamek and not him? Was it because of Roy? Was she holding all this in to spare him? To spare the both of them? Her depth of care truly knew no bounds but it's eating her alive. Even when he stepped down she knew he didn't want to. She knows him so well at this point, he's like a book to her. Yet for how easy he can be read in her eyes, he was blind to the pages of her she gave him. This wasn't fair. None of it right. Where is the love in all this pain? It's not love to pressure someone to choose you over someone else, even if that someone else is doing the same thing. Maybe it was time to end this. This whole mess wasn't healthy for any of them. As hard as it was going to be, he knew what he had to do. And that is...

"Oh my god, get this #%*&$ thing off of me!"

His thoughts broke at the sound of her distress and his instinct had him barging into the room before the idea ever clicked in his head.

"Lynsie, are you...oh...okay...?"

The sight now before the King of the Koopas was a strange one indeed. There were faint pink sparkles that were in the process of fading. Kamek was held up in a threatening stranglehold by the collar of his robes. And the one being all threatening was a very Peach-looking Lynsie. Her hair was blonde and resembled the style of Peach's though in her usual ponytail. Her face had makeup, her earrings became steel gems, a steel brooch rested on her chest, and the dress was not exactly like Peach's but close enough to fool a less detailed eye. But this wasn't a true Peach makeover. Her eyes were still her strong hazel green, the dress was as black as her t-shirt, the gloves and leggings were like the blue of jeans, that Koopa shell snugly covering her back, and she still had those old sneakers instead of heels. A clearly knockoff crown sat on her head, the poofy center it held resembles the head of a mushroom being pink with white spots while the gold rim was a basic design you could find in a costume shop. Upon noticing Bowser's staring, she immediately drops Kamek and blushes with a glare.

"Don't look at me! I'm a hideous abomination!"

She flees to cower behind bookshelves and Kamek dusts himself off as he gets himself from the floor.

"Your majesty, I present to you, the Super Crown. A strange and ancient power-up that allows the user to become a look-alike of the current ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom."

It took a few moments before Bowser lets out a gut-busting laugh. That didn't help the growling girl hiding in the back.

"This isn't funny! I look like a freak!"

"You look hilarious."

"I will smack you!"

"You'll have to come over here first."

"*roar*!"

"I see why you call her spitfire now. She has a Koopa temper."

Bowser chuckles.

"Okay, enough fun. How does she go back to normal?"

"The same way as any transformation power-up. Take a hit, lose the power."

That was something he didn't want to hear.

"What about just taking it off?"

"You think I didn't try that already?! Damn thing won't come off! It's like it's part of my head or something."

Bowser wasn't sure how to handle this. No way he was going to hit her. He'd never make that mistake twice. And he didn't like the idea of having someone else hurt her either. This was a conundrum.

"If I come over there, will you promise not to mock me?"

That at least might help slightly.

"Of course. I would never mock you...now."

"I might."

"Not if you know what's good for you, old fart!"

"He'll behave. Just come out."

She's reluctant, that's to be expected. But slowly she does come out of hiding and he can see the shame this transformation was bringing her.

"It's bad...Isn't it?"

"Honestly?"

"Yeah."

"You look like Peach fell into a punk rock outlet."

She giggled at that.

"Heh...That would be the only way she'd actually look decent."

He reaches out and touches to the crown.

"Can you feel this?"

"A little. It's very creepy."

He tries to pull it off and she hisses sharply.

"Thing really is attached. Strange doodad."

"I see no practicality to this power-up except in body doubling as Peach in some weird scheme."

"That...That would make for a good plan. Let's just chalk that one up in the 'use later' idea box."

"You make it sound like we will need that idea for later."

"Never hurts to be prepared for any sort of situation."

"Such as?"

"Such as...um..."

He had no idea what to follow that up with.

"Such as the death of the real Peach and setting up you as the replacement."

Kamek speaks as if he's had this idea for the longest time. But it does get her attention.

"Like, a body double placeholder?"

"Exactly. It would maintain the idea that Peach is still in marriage to his lordship but in reality, she'll be disposed of. You will take her place as a Peach-proxy. At least, out in public. I see no reason to keep up the charade behind closed doors."

In a strange way that made sense and it would kill two birds with one stone. It would be a way to keep the Mushroom Kingdom's people happy by seeing Peach still around and at the same time, he wouldn't have to actually deal with the real Peach. The human in all this pondered over this idea long and hard.

"As much as this plan disgusts me, I will admit I see the overall grandness in it. Though, for it to have any way of working, I do believe we'd have to fix this thing's major problem."

"Agreed. The transformation isn't a perfect one. Instead of becoming pink, it took on the colors of the clothes you were wearing."

"*sigh* I'd have to wear pink clothing and change my accessories. Lame!"

"What about her eyes? Peach's are blue."

"A simple glamour would cover that up and any other inconsistencies. All she really needs to do is work on her voice."

"Actually...I've kinda already been practicing that. *peachy* And I'd like to think I'm at the very least moderately good at mimicking her voice."

Kamek smirks while rubbing his hands evilly and Bowser himself is left in a state of disbelief.

"*normal* I usually do her voice when I mock her. I think that's what made those guys mistake me for her all that time ago. Wow, how long ago was that? I can't remember."

"My lord, this is perfect. We can easily be rid of that bothersome Toadstool and still keep the masses happy. While also having the added bonus of breaking the hearts of those blasted Mario Brothers."

The grin that gave Bowser was satisfying as it was malicious.

"That is definitely something I think we all can enjoy. What do you think?"

She smirks.

"Oh? So we are asking for my opinion in all this? From the sound of it, we were gonna do this whether I say yes or no."

"Don't be that way."

"No, no, it's fine. Princesses should be seen and not heard."

"Lynsie..."

She pinches her arm harshly and her body flashes back to its normal self. The Super Crown falls off to the side where Kamek collects it.

"I think it's past my bedtime. I'll see you boys later."

She begins to walk off to leave the room. If he lets her go, then he'll miss out on repairing their bond. So he moves just a bit faster to get ahead of her.

"Mind if I join you? The way to Jr.'s room is farther than you might expect."

She gives him a knowing look and shrugs.

"It's your castle. Do whatever you feel like doing."

She leaves and he follows while Kamek watches.

"*sigh* Those two are utterly hopeless."

Now in the halls, he keeps to her side. The silence is unnerving to him, especially since he has so much to say but is unsure how to say it all.

"Lynsie..."

"Hmmm?"

"I...I know...I..."

"Speak now, my King. Or forever hold your peace. Important matters are to be said strong. And not stuttered like idle chitchat."

She's being distant? Oh, that will not do!

"I know something happened with Roy."

She doesn't turn her sight from the path ahead and remains calm.

"Nothing happened."

"You ran out of his room in a panic."

"You were spying on me?"

Warning! Warning! Trap alert! Danger!

"Me? No! I wasn't spying on you."

"Of course not. You had the kids do your dirty work for you."

"That's beside the point."

"Unbelievable."

"What?"

"You honestly couldn't trust us?"

"You, yes. Him? Obviously not. What even happened in that room?"

"That's none of your business."

That fire of hers was flaring and he didn't like it.

"None of my business? That's my son! I have every right to know what he does."

"Then go ask him!"

"What is wrong with you? Why won't you talk to me?"

"What's there to talk about?"

"How about how you've been holding in all this emotional stuff? Why couldn't you just tell me how you felt?"

That made her stop in her tracks to glare at him.

"You...You had no right to hear..."

"Lynsie, just talk to me. I want to help you."

"Then don't make this any harder than it already is."

"How would talking to me make things harder for you?"

"You wanna know? Fine. Because it would make this unfair to any of you if I started yakking about my inability to choose whom I like."

"How do you figure...?"

"If I open up to you, then you have an advantage over Roy. If I open up to Roy, he has the advantage over you. You...heh...You really think that I haven't thought this through? That I'm winging this? Well, news flash! Rarely does this stuff ever not occupy my thoughts! Every moment I'm awake, I'm thinking of how I can possibly make either of you happy? How can I do this or do that without hurting the other person? I'm terrified of hurting either of you because for whatever reason the stars have fated me, I happen to care about you and this whole family. I want nothing more than to see each and every single one of you happy. Hell, I'm stupidly willing to be a copy of the woman I hate most in this life because it would make the Kingdom happy. Yet Kamek is right...I thought wanting your happiness was enough to make me happy as well. But it's not. I'm not happy, Bowser. I want to, I really want to be happy. But...I'm just not."

Her words, so full of melancholy and sincerity. It hurt him deeply.

"I didn't know..."

"Yeah...That makes two of us."

He frowns and as much as he hates it, he feels he has only one option if he doesn't want to lose her.

"I...I think you should go."

She sighs.

"Fine. I'd rather just go to bed and pretend this day didn't happen anyway."

"That's not what I meant."

That had her looking at him funny.

"I meant...I think you should go, as in...Not be here."

The fire that was burning in her eyes dies instantly and he tries to not show the pain this gives him.

"What do you mean? You want me gone?"

"N-No...Yes...Kind of..."

The look of betrayal comes to her like he suddenly stabbed her in the back.

"Did I do something wrong? Is this because of what I said? What did I do? Tell me! I'm sorry!"

She frightened and he wasn't expecting this level of panic.

"No, it's none of that. Please calm down. I just meant, maybe it would be best if you got away from all this. The pressure. The stress. You need to take some time to relax and let your head sort things without Roy or me influencing you at every turn. It's not fair to you."

He knows from experience what the look of someone about to cry is and at that moment, it was all her.

"But...The children...I-I can't just leave...And the Mario Brothers..."

He had to calm her down and show her that he meant well. He grabbed her and held her close, much to her confusion.

"Bowser?"

"I love you, Lynsie. That will never change. I want nothing more than for you to utter those words back to me. But I don't want you to feel like you have to or are obligated to because you think it'll make me happy. Nothing would hurt more than knowing your care is false. I want you to want to care for me because that is what YOU really want. So forget that I'm your King. Forget that any of us are royalty. Only see me as the dork of a man that you have come to know and based solely on that, judge me. Judge my son for the boy you know and not as some big shot commander. Ignore all titles and only view us on the person you've come to know. Then, and only then, you'll have the answer to this whole 'triangle' thing...I hope at least."

She seems to want to say something but holds back, choosing instead cast her eyes to the ground.

"Maybe...Maybe you're right. I don't want to think leaving is a means of figuring out my problems, but I can't say the idea didn't come to me either. ...*sigh* How long?"

"That's up to you."

She goes quiet for a while and he lets her go from his embrace.

"Lynsie?"

"...I need to think about it."

He nods.

"Understood."

This was so awkward!

"Can you...Can you still walk with me?"

She timidly asked and he wanted nothing more than to do something, anything, in the form of affection that would be assuring so she'd feel less down about all this. But he couldn't. He didn't want to come off as trying to sway her. That was already troubling her. So he went with a friendly head pat instead.

"I'd like that."

That earned him a smile and he prayed he can continue to see it for as long as she was around.

[Meanwhile: Inside Castle Seven]

Bombs blasting. Fire burning. Punches and kicks flying all over the place. And so much screaming! These are just some of the rather violent actions that have been going on inside this castle checkpoint. Mario & Luigi versus Wario, Waluigi, and Captain Syrup who's piloting Mecha-Bowser 2.0. Very one-sided fight, that's for sure...For the baddies. Due to the constant fights they always seem to get into, the Mario Brothers are very well skilled in the art of duel combat. And with only one real threat in the room, it doesn't take much to knock the Wah-boys out.

Wario is a powerhouse, built like a tank and packing a punch to back it up. What he lacks in magical abilities, he makes up for it in physical power, easily able to ram his shoulder through solid rock and cause small earthquakes when he pounds the ground. But a tank is only as good as it is controlled and that is where Wario fails. Like a boulder going downhill, once Wario moves fast enough he can't stop himself in time to move in a different direction, which leaves him open to getting slammed if he isn't super careful. Yet that's where Waluigi balances him. Waluigi is the fast and targeting attacker of the pair. Quick movements, expertly timed reflexes, and determination that doesn't quit, that is Waluigi. If Wario is like a massive stone club, then Waluigi is a rapier sword. He might not hit as hard as Wario, but if you hit something enough times it will eventually fall. Not only that, the skinny speedster possesses some magical abilities that allow him to sneak in those extra hits. Yet he also has his flaws. His most exploitable ones are his overconfidence and ego. Once you get him thinking that he can do anything he ends up dropping his guard because he believes he can do anything. So these two are fairly simple to deal with even if it might take some time. But this Captain Syrup is a BIG unknown to the brothers. And the metal monster she's piloting is just as unpredictable as she is, seemingly only attacking at just the right moment that they are barely able to evade getting massive damage.

However, despite the randomness of these attacks, there eventually starts to show a pattern. Certain times when the cannons fired. Certain times when fire shoots out. Certain times where the beast will claw, stomp, and snap its jaws at them. And knowing these times allows the brothers to strike back as oppose to just dodge. All it took to slay the great behemoth was one miracle shot. Mario, having swiped Waluigi's brass knuckles, gave them to Luigi as he acted as bait for the barrage of Banzai Bills. Luigi, now with an open opportunity, takes aim and hurls the weapon into one of the cannon openings before the ammo re-spawns. At first, nothing appears to have happened aside from Mario taking a heavy amount of damage. But then...The great machine rumbles in a completely "this isn't good" kind of way. Before anything major happens, the head launches off the body as alarms blare. The body creaks and explodes. Sending metal parts and shrapnel flying all over the room. Luckily for those on the ground, both hero and villain, no one is seriously hurt. That is until the head comes crashing down on top of the brothers and Captain Syrup lands safely some feet away, having jumped out before having the head bash the Mario Brothers. Yet, the boys aren't dead. Merely pinned down like mice under a cat's paw.

"Clever move, boys. I wasn't expecting you to be so brazen as to actually try to kill me. Well done. But...You don't live very long in my line of work if you aren't prepared for such things to happen."

Luigi attempts to struggle free as Mario lays still, having no energy left to attempt escape.

"Why? Why are you-a doing this? For the money? Can't you-a see that what you're doing is wrong?"

She smirks as Wario and Waluigi begin to stir from their form beaten up state.

"Such a sweet boy. It must be such a wonderful fantasy world you live in if you think something as pointless as right or wrong means anything. Sorry to burst your bubble, but the world only runs on one thing and one thing alone...Power. The powerful are the ones that call the shots, sweetie. Weaklings like you are the ones that dare to dream of aspirations that will never be."

"That's not true."

"Tell me something then. If your pretty pink princess is so good and worth throwing your lives in all this danger, how come she doesn't even try to ensure her safety or in the very least, the safety of her own people? As a wealthy royal, you'd think after the first kidnapping she'd in the very least set up some sort of defense system better than tiny mushrooms with pointy sticks."

"She..."

"Open your eyes, boy. Clearly, she's doing it on purpose. With each time Bowser attacks, it makes her look better by comparison. So she allows it to happen. Oh no, the big bad Bowser has taken the princess. He must be the bad guy. Frankly, how has no one called her out on this? Are all the Mushroom Kingdom citizens brain dead?"

Luigi glares, that part of him that is Mr. L beginning to stir.

"Don't listen to her, bro..."

Mario pats his brother's shoulder.

"She's just a dumb pirate. What does she know about anything?"

"More than you-a think, loser."

Wario speaks up.

"This world is bigger than just the Mushroom King and the Koopa Kingdom. Things here don't work out there."

"You-a guys are so small minded..."

Waluigi moves over to Syrup's side.

"Listen to the pretty lady. She's got a brain as gorgeous as her body.

Syrup chuckles but it's very dry.

"Okay, cutey, dial back the sweet talk. Now's not the time."

"What? I'm just agreeing with you-a. Though...Maybe later we can go out and get to know each other better?"

Wario slaps his palm to his face and Syrup proceeds to grab Waluigi by the neck, clearly not amused.

"So...you-a...don't want to date me?"

Syrup blinks a few times before cracking up.

"*laughs* Oh that is...You think I...*laughing* That is too good. I mean it's sad for you, but...*laughs then sighs* Let me put this in a way an idiot like you will understand."

She throws Waluigi and Wario knows better than to get involved with his rival when she's angry.

" I'm not the damsel in distress. I'm not your girlfriend or the frightened princess. I'm not a little bird who needs your help to fly. Nope...I'm the bad guy! "

She moves over to Wario and he folds his arms while trying to remain detracted to the situation.

" This big fella that you see. He and so many more have knelt before me. So I'm not your teammate or your partner in crime. What am I, handsome? "

Wario sighs

"She's the bad guy."

She smiles and kisses his cheek before shoving him down.

" Oh, it's magic. To watch others panic. As I rob them blind. Oh, it's thrillin'. To be a villain. I destroy others hopes and then I watch them cry. *laughs* 'Cause I'm the bad guy! "

Waluigi feels like a fool and Wario wants nothing more than to punch this woman but is conflicted on if that's really okay to do or not. Syrup twirls teasingly, having fun and letting loose. Though none of them notice a rather stern looking Luigi getting loose from the metal head and starting to stealthily work of freeing his brother.

" Oh, ain't it fantastic? I see something, I snatch it! And let me tell you why. I've always had a weakness. For manipulation and meanness. I crush all your hopes and then I watch you cry. "

She takes Waluigi's hat and grinds her shoe into in with a grin, much to his wide-eyed shock.

" See, I find this business rather fun. I don't want your assistance or your adulation. I'll take all of your beloved things and bid you bye bye! Why? Come on, guess!"

Waluigi looks over at Wario and the latter just nods his head.

"'Cause you're the bad guy?"

She smirks.

"Or, well, girl. But you get what I mean. *evil laughter*"

Her mockery over, she turns around to finish off her true targets. Only to end up on the receiving end of a very hard uppercut that knocks her out cold. The Wah-boys are taken by surprise, not only because someone beat them to the literal punch but the one to do said punch was wussy wuss boy Luigi. Luigi himself holds his brother over his shoulder while sporting a very intimidating look.

"Shut up, annoying sea cow."

Luigi then casts his dark gaze on the other baddies and they flinch.

"If you-a know what's good for you-a, you'll stay out of my way."

They make no effort to move as Luigi walks past and leaves the castle with his brother. With this, I guess, victory of the final castle, the Mario Brothers now are on the road to the final destination.

"Did that really just happen?"

"It did but I still can't believe it."

They look at the unconscious Syrup.

"What do we do about her?"

"I say...We blame everything on her."

"Agreed."

They get themselves together and dust off.

"Wanna go halves on an all you can eat buffet?"

"Sure. Just let me do one thing first."

Wario watches as Waluigi pulls out a marker and scribble on Syrup's face. She now has a mustache, beard, glasses, and her forehead reads "LOSER".

"Now we can go."

"Heh...Nice."

[Meanwhile: Outside Castle Seven]

"Mayday! PG Scout #123 to Base Command! Come in Base Command! Over!"

"PG Scout #123, this is Base Commando #456. What is the situation? Over."

"We have a breach! I repeat! We have a breach! The Mario Brothers have exited Castle Seven and entered the Kingdom! Over!"

"Are you certain that it's truly them? Over."

There is a scream before silence.

"PG Scout #123, what was that sound? Over."

There is no response.

"PG Scout #123, respond. Over."

Still nothing.

"PG Scout #123, respond! This is an order! Over."

The radio clicks on ominously.

"PG Scout #123, what is your situation? Over."

"...I don't-a know who you-a are. I don't-a care what you-a want. If you-a think I'm-a going to let any of you-a go without punishment, then think again. For I have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make-a me a nightmare for people like you-a. If you-a let the Princess go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you-a, I will not pursue you-a, but if you-a don't...I will look for you-a, I will find you-a, and I will kill you-a."

The radio goes quiet for a moment.

"Good luck trying, plumber-boy."

The declaration has been made. Alarms blare. Soldiers deployed. This is war and it will not end well.

Just in case there is still some questions to my logic, I'll help clear up a few things. Using the Official Nintendo chart (google super mario bros size chart and it's the first image you see) we can see how tall a lot of them are, though I had to guess height for the Koopalings based on screen images of them next to each other, plus Mario and Luigi. Now the Nintendo-approved statue poster claims it to be "life-sized", thus putting Mario's height at 155 cm (5'1"). Using that information along with this universal size chart, it's possible to estimate the height of all of the mainstays of the franchise. From shortest to tallest: a Goomba is 72 cm (2'4"); a Boo is 79 cm (2'7"); Baby Mario is 89 cm (2'11"); Baby Luigi is 90 cm (2'11"); a Shy Guy is 100 cm (3'3"); Toad, Toadette, and Toadsworth are 103 cm (3'5"); Diddy and Dixie Kong (on their knuckles) are 113 cm (3'8"); a Koopa Troopa is 120 cm (3'11"); a Dry Bones is 124 cm (4'1"); Bowser Jr. is 131 cm (4'4"); a Hammer Bro. is 142 cm (4'8"); a Bullet Bill is 148 cm (4'10") long and 96 cm (3'2") in diameter; a Wiggler is 159 cm (5'3") tall (not including the flower) and who knows how long; Wario and Birdo are 170 cm (5'7") (Birdo is 196 cm [6'5"] if you include her bow); Luigi and Yoshi are 175 cm (5'9"); Lakitu (including cloud) is 179 cm (5'10"); Daisy is 180 cm (5'11"); Donkey Kong (on his knuckles) and Peach (!) are 186 cm (6'1"); Waluigi (with his knees bent a bit) is 216 cm (7'1"); Bowser is 262 cm (8'7"); and Petey Piranha is a whopping 389 cm (12'9"). Normal Piranha Plants seem to vary in height depending on how long their bodies are, but the diameter of their heads is about 111 cm (3'8"). Now for the even harder part, character ages. When it comes to Jr.'s age and that of the Koopalings, I used their first game appearance as their birth year and added till now, this is why Jr. is 15 as Super Mario Sunshine came out 15 years ago and it's his first game. I'll explain why his age and his appearance don't seem to match later on, but after words I hope it'll make sense to you like it does to me.
If there are any questions, feel free to ask.