Rated M
New Beginning: The Same Refrain
Chapter 11
"Yes." He took up her arm again. "We can just walk."
They walked back to the small village not speaking to one another. They stopped occasionally and looked in the shops windows and past the closed doors. When they came to the far end of town Severus, saw an Inn and taking Hannah by the arm led her in to get a room.
Hannah turned her head away as the desk clerk leered at her, reddening, as she knew he had seen her in the pub. By tomorrow, every one would know she had come here with a strange man, a lover. She looked up at Severus as he signed the registry and shook her head.
"Severus," she said as the clerk turned to take his key off a rack of hooks behind the counter. "This is embrassing, I know him. I have to leave, I can't do this."
Severus looked down at her then to the clerk. He saw the smirk on the Innkeepers face as the key dropped into his open hand. He had seen this look many times before when he took his whores up the stairs at the bars of Knockturn Alley, these same leers had followed him then, and they would not now.
He handed Hannah the key and nodded toward the hallway that lead to the rooms. He slipped his wand from his sleeve, looking after her with a smirk.
"Your virture will be kept," he said turning back toward the clerk. "Go on now, the clerk and I have things to talk about."
Hannah understood what he planed to do and hurried off in the direction of the rooms. Her hand was shaking as she turned the key and stepped into the small no frills room. She looked around hoping to find chairs to sit on, but found only the bed.
"Nervous?" Severus was standing leaning in the open doorway smirking at her.
"Severus, I can't do this." She turned from him and wrapping her arms around her waist stood looking out of the window.
"Why? What has changed?" Severus walked and stood so close she could feel the words on her hair.
"Severus, leave it please." She lowered her head and tried to step past him.
"No, Hannah, look at me." He pulled her to him. He reached for her chin as she pulled hard against his hand and bringing up both of hers pushed against him, knocking him back.
"You come here when you want a fuck," she said to him. "How do you think that makes me feel? Is this all you want?"
"Hannah, please. You don't understand. You don't know."
"I know what you want. I know what all your type want." She grabbed her jumper and purse off the bed and started for the door. "Nothing's changed. You are still the same as you were at Spinners End."
He ran and caught her, spun her around and crushed his mouth to hers. He felt her tense in his arms, felt her twist only to feel the pressure of her twisting on his erection. He groaned into her mouth as he pulled her closer. Then as quickly as he had grabbed her, he pushed her away as she continued to struggle against him.
"You are right," he said coldly. "I should have just used a whore. Physical release need not include involvements."
"Is that all I am to you?" she whispered.
"Unlike you I am incapable of thinking every need to runt a moment of future bliss," he sneered at her.
"Once, I …," she started to say, then covering her mouth with her hand ran for the door.
He grabbed her and spun her around, looking at her face and her tears.
"Finish," he said forgetting how to breathe.
"Once I thought someone cared," she almost chocked on her words.
"Then you must have been mistaken," he said coldly. "I see what you pick up and call a boyfriend, and then let him slap you around."
"I was not speaking of him," she reddened and looked away. "Just once, I thought someone cared."
Severus stepped back from her and opened the door. He stood there and watched as she walked out and returned to the lobby to leave. His stomach caught, he found it hard to breathe. He had heard the question in her voice; he knew what she wanted to hear but he could not say the words.
He remembered her as she walked down the hallway, as he saw her leave him, he remembered. She had sat next to him on the rickety cart and clutched his arm in fear. She hid her head on his chest and screamed as the cart reached the top of the loop and flung them upside down. He had taken the ride on the roller coaster as a passage to manhood and talked her into coming along. Her arms wrapped around him and she screamed his name. He remembered her on the train, and the lunch they shared. He remembered the stolen kiss and her smile.
He looked around the cold room and at the made up bed. Then apparating away he let the crack of his thunder fill the room.
Without thinking, he had gone to the Malfoy Manor. He strode up to the house angrily and glared at the elf that was waiting inside the entry door.
"The Master is the sitting room. He hears you come." The elf opened a door off the entry and bowed low stepping aside and Severus walked past him.
"My," Lucius looked up from his reading and set the book down on the end table as Severus walked in. "I was wondering what had become of you."
"I have started a new job." Severus walked over to the liquor cabinet and helped him to a glass of whiskey. "You are looking at Hogwarts newest Potions Professor."
"Albus's lackey?" Lucius sneered, "I am sure you could have done better."
"Not if I want to eat."
"Dressed like a Muggle?"
"I thought I would see what a Muggle whore had to offer," Severus laughed at the look of surprise on Lucius's face.
"Did you find they were easier?" Lucius watched him down his second drink and reach for a third.
"No, cheaper however," Severus said and looked in the again empty glass and saw brown eyes on the bottom. Filling the glass, he crossed to the seating area and sat facing Lucius.
"Tell me Lucius, where is my favourite witch?"
"She is quite fine my friend," Lucius said seriously. "I think she has accepted my apologies, however she still cries on occasion."
"Is it the loss of the child or because she knows she can not trust her husband?" Severus swirled the amber liquid in his glass and held it to the light.
"You are here as my guest Severus," Lucius stood walking to the door. "However, I do find the hour late. I am sorry you have to leave so soon."
"I will see Narcissa before I leave." Severus sipped his drink slowly. "I am sure you understand."
"Then I am afraid you will be sorely disappointed." Lucius said stonily. "She is spending some time at her sisters."
"What have you done to her?" Severus stood and slipped the wand down low enough for the base to rest in his palm.
"I have not touched her," Lucius smirked. "Not even in anger. She is mourning the loss of my bed."
"She has honoured her fidelity oath, you know that," Severus frowned at him. "Yet you treat her as a whore. I don't understand you Lucius."
"I am keeping the ranks together for his return. She questions my decision to do so. You know he is going to return." Lucius stood tall. "When he does she will be obedient to me."
Severus felt uneasy. Without thinking, he lifted his left arm and rubbed it with his right hand.
"You feel him too." Lucius smiled at Severus. "Can you feel his power?"
"Tell Narcissa to send me an owl." Severus started for the door tasting the familiar bile at the back of his throat.
"I will call you to the meetings Severus. I will soon be able to use the Marks." Lucius stood grinning, flinging his long hair over his shoulder with a twist of his head. "You will tell me what the old man plans."
"I will be teaching there, I will not be in his confidence." Severus scowled as he placed his hand on the doorknob.
"Then get there," Lucius spat. "If you want to see your Spinners End whore you will get in his confidence."
Severus did not turn, or make any outward sign that he had heard the threat. He held his breath until he was safely outside before allowing himself to take short gasps. Hannah, Lucius knew of Hannah as he had known of Lily. The threat was the same.
Striding out of the gates and returning to Hogwarts, he had only one place to go. He stood looking up at the tower seeing a flickering light still on in the Headmasters Office and knew his freedom was over. What little life he had left, he would now give away. He entered the castle started the longest walk he had yet to take.
"Headmaster," he said standing in the doorway watching Albus and Minerva going over reports.
"Professor, I did not expect you back until noon tomorrow." Albus looked at him questioning.
"I have need to talk to you alone Sir," Severus said looking a Minerva.
"I was just about to call it an evening," Minerva sighed. "We have already been at his for hours. I don't see how going over it one more time will change anything."
"Goodnight, Minerva. We can finish in the morning." Albus watched her leave before turning to Severus.
"It is late." Albus stated the obvious.
"I have come to bargain." Severus walked over and sat facing Albus.
"I am not aware that you have anything to bargain." Albus sat back, stroking his beard.
"You already have my loyalty old man. I am here to give you what is left of my soul." Severus said with no emotion.
"Your soul? I thought Tom had already taken that?" Albus looked over his spectacles.
"The Dark Lord's mark is being reactivated." Severus let his words hang in the air.
"Do go on." Albus watched the younger wizard carefully.
"I am willing to bring you information, at personal risk in exchange for a boon," Severus said with a blank face and no movement.
"What is this boon," Albus asked calmly.
"You will offer your protection," Severus hesitated. "No, you will give your protection and security to Hannah."
"She is a Muggle," Albus sounded surprised.
"Tell me old man. Is it all Muggles you shun or only the half-bloods?" Severus sneered at him.
"Who has threatened her?"
"Your Oath." Severus remained calm and unmoving.
"You demand an Oath of me?" Albus stood up as his magic crackled around him.
"Yes," Severus said standing to face the most powerful wizard he knew, perhaps the most powerful in this world.
"Why should I do this when I have you oath of loyalty?" Albus frowned.
"Your Oath can keep me close. However, it will also keep me from becoming your spy." Severus said smoothly. "I will need the oath modified to allow me access to the dark side, to allow me to do what I must do, to pretend my allegiance to the Dark Lord. I can get in where you need me to be and bring information back to you."
"You can do this with out an Oath." Albus looked at him uneasily.
"I will need on occasion to play my role well," Severus said with a sneer. "Surely you know what I must do to keep up the pretence. Your oath will not allow me to partake in certain deeds."
"Not two months ago this life almost drove you mad." Albus narrowed his eyes. "What makes you think you can do it this time?"
"I fear I will go mad if I do not." Severus sat down, leaned forward in the chair, letting his head drop down. "I lost every thing once. I will not do so again. Madness may be my only way out. Sometimes, I think I seek it. Sometimes, I welcome it."
"Very well, Severus," the Headmaster said using his first name. "I will call Minerva in to give the Oath. You will have to get word to Miss Haywood. I will Oath my protection to her as long as you are of value."
"Of value?" Severus scowled. "And if I am dead?"
"I would suggest that you take care of your self Professor." Albus leaned back comfortably in his chair, and then flicked his hand sending his Patronus for Minerva.
"She means this much to you?" Albus reached for his bowl of lemon drops.
"She did." Severus looked to the door wanting Minerva to hurry.
"She will need to know what to watch for." Albus opened his desk drawer and removed his wand. "She will need to know when she is in danger and how to contact us."
"You will need to use a messenger other then myself." He looked at the headmaster coldly. "This is part of the oath. You will protect her, and watch over her."
"What have you done to the poor girl now Severus?" Minerva said from the doorway scowling at him.