Rated M

New Beginning: The Same Refrain

Chapter 32

Hannah sat at the kitchen table flipping the pages of the newspaper looking for sale notices for used cars. Glancing at the clock she got up to go to the bottom of the stairs and yelled up to Tobias.

"You better hurry up young man. I don't want you late again because you are too lazy to get out of bed."

"Ah, Mum," Tobias said. "I am not late."

"Yeah, not yet. Remember the car is in the shop again."

"Ken's Mum said she would collect me."

"You have to eat yet, now get down here."

"I don't want breakfast, I hate breakfast."

"At least have some juice and toast. You know it is important."

She went back to the kitchen pulling her jumper tight against her. It was colder than usual for this time of year and she refused to turn on the heat. She could ill afford a higher bill this month. Tobias had outgrown his shoes again, and she had already let the cuff down on his school uniform hoping to make them last until the end of term. She sat down to her paper again only putting it down when she heard Tobias slide out the chair opposite her.

She nodded to the jug of orange juice and scowled until he poured himself a glass. "Your test is today."

"Yeah, I hate math. I wish I didn't even have to take it."

"Well, I am afraid that thirteen is not old enough to quit school. Anyway, when Severus comes back he can help you with your homework."

"Yeah, if you mean." He rolled his eyes at the ceiling.

Hannah stood and grabbed the dirty dishes off the table and carried them to the sink. She stood staring at the wall in front of her and closed her eyes not knowing what to say to him.

"I am sorry Mum. I don't know, I don't even remember him."

"Of course you do." She turned and looked at him suddenly aware that he had no memory of that time. He had been too young. "The dragon, remember getting your dragon?"

"No Mum, I know the stories, but I can't remember him."

He picked up a piece of toast and started to eat it, looking at the cereal in the bowl at his elbow. Finally giving in, as his stomach poked him, he pulled the bowl in front of him and reached for the goat's milk his mother still insisted on buying.

"Ken's dad left." He sat hunched over the bowl, looking up through his lashes. "Just like he did."

"He didn't leave because he wanted to," she snapped at him.

"Sorry." He put his head back down and shovelled the cereal into his mouth.

"Chunk, he would be here if he could."

"Mum?" He put his spoon down but kept his eyes to the bowl. "My dad left to. Do you think he might come back?"

Hannah knew he would ask her this eventually. She planned a whole speech of what to say. But now, faced with the question she was unable to answer. She looked at the clock and wiped her hand across her eyes.

"Well, best get to school." She ruffled his hair as she walked by him on her way to the front door. She cursed her self for doing this, for not answering his questions and for having her own doubts.

She stood by the door and opened it for him when he finally managed to gather his jumper and book bag together and head outside. Leaning toward him for the obligatory kiss, she was a little startled when he refused her, pulling back and then ducking under her arm and running down the steps.

"That's the way they are." Connie laughed up at her from the pavement. "My John is the same way."

"How are you Connie?" Hannah smiled at her neighbour. "Haven't seen you around for a while."

"I was at my Mum's, she isn't doing well you know." Connie shrugged her shoulders. "Got quiet a start last night when I got home. It must have been past midnight and I thought I saw a light down in the corner place."

"The old Snape house?" Hannah felt her heart begin to beat faster.

"Yeah, but it's been empty of a while now. Anyway I told Tony and he went over there but didn't find anything."

"Thanks Connie," Hannah could not take her eyes off the house. "So, Tony is staying over again?"

"I know what I said. But what that man can do to me." She fanned her face with her hand and smiled. "I don't know how you do it in that house all by your self."

"Yeah Connie, listen, I have to go now. " She stepped back into the house and closed the door.

She ran to the window and pulled back the curtain to see the house better, then dropping to her knees and resting her head on the sill she sat and waited for a movement, a light or an owl. She watched for most of the day, until it was time for Tobias to come home, and then hurried out to the kitchen to get something on the table for him.

She decided Connie was wrong about seeing a light. He would have come to her and not hidden in the house so long empty. She could still hear his voice and his promise, she could close her eyes and feel his arms and smell his robes that reminded her of the spice shop in the old part of town. She put her hand over her mouth to stop her sob from escaping from years of practice in hiding her grief from Tobias.

The knock on the door brought her mind back to the present and she immediately looked to the clock. Rolling her eyes thinking Tobias had again forgot his key she opened the door expecting to see him and froze and then felt her knees turn to water as Minerva reached out to catch her.

"Mum!" Tobias ran up the stairs in time to see Minerva gently lower the sobbing woman to the floor.

"What did you do to my Mum?" He knelt down and hugged his mother, glaring at the stranger who was kneeling in front of them.

"Tobias, perhaps you will leave us for a few minutes," Minerva sternly suggested.

"No," he said looking at his Mum. Seeing the tears on her face, he put his arm around her shoulder and tried to sit up taller than he was.

"Tobias, please," she spoke to her son but looked a Minerva. "Run up stairs and change. Put on your play clothes."

Tobias stood up, wiped his nose with the back of his hand, and then quickly ran up the stairs. Stopping at the top, he watched the strange woman until his mother looked up at him and ordered him to his room.

"Now dear," Minerva helped Hannah to stand and walked with her to the sofa.

"This is from Severus." Minerva pressed the envelope into Hannah's hands. "I am working to get his account at Gingotts transferred to your name as well."

"How?" Hannah could not finish could not hear what Minerva said, could hear only the rush of her blood and her heartbeat. "He told me to wait. He said… he promised… please, no."

"Dear, I will come back and we will talk when I have more time. I am afraid we have lost many, and there is much to do." Minerva stood and looked down at her sadly. "I only came to give you the news, and to carry out his last wishes."

"Service, will he, I mean…" Hannah looked up at Minerva. "I don't even know if you have services there. I want to see him. I want to say goodbye."

"Hannah, you have to understand. It was a war." Minerva looked uncomfortable. She sat down next to Hannah and tried to explain how he had died. Over a month had passed as they looked for the body, and hoped that one of the captured Death Eaters could tell them where he laid.

"We think that before the end the Death Eaters took his body back. We don't know why, but we have been unable to locate his remains."

"What?" Hannah looked at Minerva confused.

"Harry saw him die, make no mistake in that. However, when we went back to retrieve his body he was gone."

"Gone." Hannah stood up and grabbed Minerva. "What do you mean gone?"

Minerva answered something Hannah could no longer hear. She looked at the door and back at Minerva, hugged the witch to her and pushing her back began to run. She yanked the door open and ran barefoot across the road and down the pavement. He would be there. She knew he was there. He had come back she cursed herself for sitting at the window all day and waiting.

Hannah pulled on the front door to find it locked. She cursed and leaned over the step rail to look into the window. Looking into the window through cupped hands, she was still unable to see any movement. She ran to the side and did the same to the kitchen window, cursing the fact that in all these years she had never thought to clean this damned house.

She ran to the back, jumping up, trying to see over the fence and pulling on the gate she heard the jingle of the chain that held it closed from the inside. Cursing, she looked around and saw a trash bin. Looking at it and back at the fence she went over and dragged it closer, muttering under her breath and wishing for the only time she had enough magic to open a door, just this once. Climbing on the bin, and praying that it did not tip she peered over the fence seeing only darkness.

"Shite."

She threw her left leg over the fence, pulled her self up on her arms and was swinging her other leg over when she lost her balance and fell to the ground flat on her back. She felt her breath burst out of her lungs in a rush and could only lie looking straight up with her mouth wide open trying to catch air.

"If you had knocked I would have opened it," Severus smirked down at her.

"Arse," she managed to hiss out before the pain ran though her.

He squatted down feeling his lip twitch. "I see time has not been kind to your tongue. Still that foul mouthed Spinners End kid?"

"Minerva said you were dead." She struggled to sit up, only to have him push her back.

"Wait," he scowled and took out his wand, checking her for injuries. "You are fine, just winded."

She sat up, rotating her head, and then her shoulders as she struggled to her feet. She stood looking at him forgetting how to breathe feeling unwanted tears behind her eyes.

"I was unsure if you…" He stopped and looked at her. "It has been a long time."

"You have been here one whole month and not bothered to as much as walk across the road." She hit his chest with her fists.

He caught her by the wrists and pulled her to him. "I was unsure."

"Unsure if I waited?" She pulled her wrists free. "Or unsure you still want to be here."

"Both."

"Of course I waited for you. What? You think I like it here?"

"Hannah, there is more to it then just what we want."

"And you Severus?" she said, feeling her chest tighten. "What do you want?"

"What I have wanted since I was seventeen and stood where I stand now. You watched as the spring eggs hatched and helped me name my first white owl."

"I remember." She smiled looking around the small yard. "You used to have only those small brown ones."

"There will be people who do not approve of us." He pushed the hair from her eyes and tucked it behind her ear.

"There have always been people who disapprove of me. You know, the foul mouthed tramp that brought home a bastard."

He gently placed his finger on her lips and shook his head. "They will dislike you because you are a Muggle and because I am a Death Eater, and you chose me."

"You are not, you only…"

"It does not matter. It is what they will think. Make no mistake that there are crimes I committed, crimes that you may not forgive me for."

"What crimes?"

"Albus is dead."

"Oh my god." She lowered her eyes to the ground and thought of the last time she had seen him.

"Hannah, he died by my hand."

She slowly raised her eyes until they met with his. "Why, my God Severus. What did he make you do? Him and his damnable oaths."

He grabbed her and crushed his lips to hers, holding her and resting his head on hers. He had been afraid to tell her of what he had done, he did not know if he could stand the look in her eyes or the feel of her rejection. But she had not hesitated, nor flinched, but knew him to be innocent.

"Did you wait?" He closed his eyes and held her tighter. "Do I still have a chance?"

"A chance?" She struggled to pull away enough to look at his face. "No, not a chance. I would call it a sure thing."

"Alohomora", they both turned to see the gate fly open and a very surprised Minerva.

"Severus," she said, reaching out to brace her hand on the gate. "How… What…"

Severus went over to her and helped her stand. "I must say I have not seen you lost for words before."

"Severus Tobias Snape," she scowled and shook her finger at him. "If I were not so old I would turn you over my knee."

He folded his arms across his chest and sneered down at her. "Indeed?"

"Oh young man I thought you dead." She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him quickly on his cheek. "Now find an old woman a chair I am about to fall down."

Severus smirked and waved his wand at a broken flowerpot, transfiguring an overstuffed chair and tenderly led Minerva to it and helped her sit down.

"Bloody hell." Tobias said in awe as he watched from the gate. "Mum did you see that?"

"Did you sell tickets?" Severus smirked at Hannah.

"Tobias." Hannah walked to him and put her arm around his shoulder.

"Are you Severus? Mum?"

"I am sorry Severus, he was so young." She worried her lip and watched as the two looked at each other.

"You grew," Severus said the first thing that came to his mind. "Tell me boy, does all this surprise you?"

"What do you mean?" Tobias stepped back closer to his mother.

"You know what I mean." Severus frowned and stepped closer, causing Tobias to move behind Hannah.

"Don't hide behind a woman boy." He followed Tobias, walking in a wide circle. "Now tell me how you manage to hide it."

"Severus, you are scaring him." Hannah turned with them, Tobias trying to keep behind her and Severus walking in a circle.

"Severus," Minerva said. "Leave the lad be."

"Answer me. How do you hide it?" Severus kept moving in a circle.

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"If I make you any angrier than you are, you will show me. You will not be able to stop it."

"I don't know…"

"Severus," Minerva stood, holding on to the back of the chair.

"Tell me boy."

"Severus, stop." Hannah tried to step in front of Tobias. "He is not angry at you. He is just upset over all this."

"I boil water." Tobias said quickly then saw Severus stop.

Severus transfigured a metal pot, and then filled it with water. Tobias watched him carefully but Severus was sure the boy was listening for the incantations more than watching in amazement.

"Show me," Severus said stepping back, holding up his arm in front of Hannah to stop her from going to the boy.

Tobias licked his lips and raised his hand over the bucket, creating a fist, and then throwing his magic into the water, which rose to an angry boil and hissed over the brim. .

"Good." Severus raised an eyebrow.

"Tobias, how did you do that?" Hannah gabbed him and spun him around to face her.

"I believe it is a side effect of his cure." Severus still stood looking at the boy. "Tell me boy, what do you remember?"

"Really Severus," Minerva said. "He was only three."

"Tobias?" Hannah said his name as a question.

"I remember," he said and looked down at the ground. "I remember Mum crying a lot, and a man with a long beard and trying to stay awake until you came home."

Severus walked over to him and lifted up his chin. "And if I told you I am home now and I plan on staying what would you say?"

"I think I would tell you not to make my Mum cry anymore," Tobias said looking up into Severus' face.

"You will get a letter. A letter inviting you to a school where you can learn wonderful things." Severus looked at Minerva. "You can say no, or you can go. The choice will be yours."

"Severus?" Hannah put her arm around her son. "If he decides not to, what will happen?"

"I will show him only how to control his anger, and live here. He will never be powerful but I can feel a fair amount of magic in him."

"And if he decides to go?"

"Then I will clear my name with the Ministry and we will live there."

"I don't think clearing your name will be difficult," Minerva smiled. "You would be surprised at the people who would testify for you."

"Minerva, why don't you take Tobias back to Hogwarts with you and show him around?" Severus watched Tobias for a reaction and then stepped back. "Keep him for a few days. Get him used to things."

"I don't think it is a good time. There is still the damage, and the…"

"Think of something." He walked over to Hannah and pulled her to his side. "Or stand there and watch, I no longer care."

His arms went around her as he leaned down and kissed her, deepening it as he heard the sound of apparation. She leaned into him and parted her lips. He tasted her and pulled back taking her hand and leading her out of the yard and back across the road. He lengthened his stride until she was almost running to keep up.

"Severus, what ever is the hurry."

"You."

"Severus!" She giggled as he hurried behind him. "I swear, Minerva said you were dead now here you are not even injured."

He laughed at her and turned quickly causing her to fall into him. "Another side affect my dear."

"Side affect?"

"The potion I made for Tobias. I make one for you and put one aside in case I ever needed it."

"Yes, Albus told me of the potion you decided I needed." She looked up at him and narrowed her eyes.

He turned and grabbed her hand again, pulling her up the steps and into the house.

"I plan on seeing if it works." He lifted her up and carried her upstairs.