Hi everyone, I know I've been gone a very long time, and I'm sorry I had to put this story on hiatus but I was just in a terrible place. I was recently diagnosed with depression and anxiety and was put on medication for it. I also moved out and have recently finished college, so life has been hectic and I'm afraid this just didn't take priority through all that. But I'm hoping to start uploading to this story more frequently now.

Also, I wanted to let you know that I intend doing frequent time jumps in this story.

*DISCLAIMER* I only own Ali, Jason, Sam, Zavier and the kids, all other rights go to Cassandra Clare.

*CW*:

Mention and talk of pregnancy loss.

Mention and talk of domestic abuse.

Chapter 4.

*Ali's P.O.V.*

I've thought about getting engaged to Eric for a long time, ever since I got pregnant with Maddey, really. When I thought about it, I always thought I would be hesitant and fearful, since my previous engagement was to an abusive control freak who beat me on a regular basis and could have killed Sophie. But much to my surprise I find I am not one bit hesitant, I trust Eric and I know he loves me and our daughters, really loves us, I know he would never lay a hand on me or our girls, he is extremely supportive of my involvement with Will and Sophie (and Addie) unlike Jordan was, I know I can trust him and I know I want to marry him, there's not a shadow of a doubt in my mind.

"I thought you'd never ask." I softly say. Eric breaks out into a wide grin and a short laugh of delight escapes his throat, his brown eyes filled with hope and joy, just looking at him I know this is the man I have always been destined to love and marry and spend my life with, he's my other half, I feel complete with him.

"So it's a yes?" Eric excitedly asks. Grinning widely I nod and say

"Yes, of course it's a yes." Eric slides the ring onto my finger and it fits perfectly and feels as if it were always meant to be there, it's beautiful, much smaller than the engagement ring Jordan got me, but of course I don't care, that's in the trash now, I don't care about the size or look of the ring, I care about the person who has given it to me, and this time I know it's the right person.

"I love you Ali." Eric softly says, cupping my cheek in his hand.

"I love you too." I reply, gently grabbing his wrist and relaxing at his touch.

"When do you want to get married?" Eric asks in a curious tone. I want to be married to this man as soon as possible, I want to be his wife, and I want us to be married before Kathy is born, so nobody can say the awful things they say about Maddey and the fact she was born out of wedlock, about Kathy. She will have a hard enough time having Down's Syndrome, no doubt The Clave will want me to terminate or place her for adoption with a mundane family, since she will never be a warrior, like her sister might, but this sweet baby girl is mine and I love her and she is more than just another warrior, she is my daughter and I will protect her with my life.

"As soon as possible, I just want a small ceremony with close friends and family." I reply.

"Me too, and I have some good news." Eric says in a joyful tone.

"What is it?" I ask, full of curiosity.

"Remember I applied to Ascend, back when Maddey was a baby? And how I've been training at The Institute and Simon and Clary have been helping me with the academic side of things?" He asks. When Eric and I got back together when I was pregnant with Maddey, we both knew we would spend our lives together and that one day we would want to be married, so Eric applied to Ascend, just a few days after Maddey was born, but he has never gotten a reply, or not that I know of anyway.

"Yes, did you get a reply?" I asks hopefully.

"Yes, they approved my application, I am to Ascend in two months." Eric replies. Oh this is wonderful! We can still be married before Kathy is born, and perhaps now other Shadowhunters will stop judging me for being with a Mundane and having a child with him.

"That's wonderful! But Eric, I want you to know that I would rather leave The Clave than not be with you, I would give up everything for you and our girls, it would kill me to never see Will and Sophie again, but I know they are safe and loved and cherished with Magnus and Alec and would be just fine without me, whereas Maddey needs us both, and Kathy, I would do anything for you three." I firmly say. I had always hoped it would never come to that, and thankfully it does not seem that it will, but if it did, I would give up everything in a heartbeat, no matter how painful, what matters to me most are my kids and my husband, and as I said, I know Will and Sophie are safe and loved with Magnus and Alec, without me, Kathy and Maddey would always be missing something, they need me as much as I need them.

"I wouldn't want you to do that, you did the most selfless thing for Will by placing him with Magnus and Alec, and two years later you were extremely selfless again by being their surrogate at only 19, I cannot and do not expect you to leave them for me." Eric softly says.

"Well, it doesn't matter now does it? It won't ever have to happen, I can have you and them and that's all I want." I say in a light heated tone.

"No, you're right it doesn't, it's getting late, shall we go pick Maddey up and tell mom the good news?" Eric asks. My heart swells at the thought of seeing my sweet baby girl, even after being apart from her for only a few hours, I miss her terribly, after giving up two babies before her I have a lot of anxiety about being away from Maddey, especially for long periods of time, it is something I really need to work on, especially before Kathy is born.

"Yes, lets, then perhaps we could take her to Magnus and Alec's tomorrow and tell them the good news?" I ask in a tried voice, beginning to feel the familiar fatigue of pregnancy kick in.

"Sounds perfect."

*TESSA'S P.O.V.*

*The next day*

"Mama where go?" Esther asks in a confused tone as I pull on my coat while Jem finishes buttoning his, beside me. We're going to The Silent City today, to find out if all is okay with the baby, and to find out the sex. I'm quiet nervous about it, I haven't been to The Silent City since I was pregnant with Lucie, I did not feel comfortable with it when I was pregnant with Esther, Catarina helped me wonderfully throughout my pregnancy with Esther, but I know Jem would be more at ease if we got confirmation from The Silent Brothers that our baby and I are healthy, and I'm not so uncomfortable about going to The Silent City anymore. In fact, I can't wait to know everything about my baby and find out if we're having a boy or a girl. With Esther I knew from the start she was a girl, form the moment I found out I was pregnant, I had a gut instinct that she was a girl, it was the same with Jamie and Lucie, I was right about the sex of the baby all 3 times I was pregnant, and this time will likely be no different, we are definitely having another girl, sweet Elizabeth, I'm thinking of shortening her name to Eliza, it's a name both Jem and I adore and I think it will suit her, Esther and Eliza Carstairs, it sounds perfect. While Jem and I are in The Silent City, Emma and Mark are watching Esther, I'm extremely grateful that they offered, Esther is very clingy but I know she'll be happy as can be with Emma and Mark, two of her favorite people.

"We're going to make sure the baby is alright, sweetheart, and to find out if it's a girl or a boy." I gently say.

"Girl! Want sister!" Esther exclaims.

"Well we'll soon find out, when mama and I come back, we'll know if you're getting a sister or a brother." Jem says in a joyful tone, clearly as excited about this as I am.

"Really want sister." Esther says in a dreamy voice.

"I know baby girl, but you'll love your sibling even if you get a brother, right?" Jem gently asks.

"Uh hu, I tect baby, love them." Esther says in a proud tone. She is going to be such a wonderful big sister, I am so proud of her, I simply cannot wait to see her and Eliza together in just a few months time.

"We'd best go, Tess." Jem quietly says. Really there's no need to hurry, but if we stay too much longer, Esther will be very upset when we leave, which is not something we want, hopefully she'll stay completely calm.

"You're right, bye baby girl, I'll see you soon." I softly say, leaning down to embrace my daughter and kiss her chubby little cheek, causing her to shriek in delight, she's a very affectionate little girl and loves getting hugs and kisses.

"You be good for Emma and Mark okay?" Jem gently says, scooping Esther into a hug.

"Promise daddy!" Esther exclaims.

"That's my girl." Jem says, setting her down.

"Esther, why don't you come over here and I'll tell you another story about Faerie?" Mark says, from his position on the sofa across the room.

"Okay!" Esther says and runs to him, scrambling onto his lap and looking at him intently, waiting for the story to start.

When Jem and I reach The Silent City, we are greeted at the entrance by Brother Malachi. This place stills gives me the chills, but being here means a lot to Jem and means we'll know for an absolute fact that Eliza is okay, since she's not exactly a normal Shadowhunter, when I was pregnant with James, Lucie and Esther, I was told there could be complications due to the fact I am half Nephilm, half demon and Jem is a full blooded Shadowhunter, I'm sure those chances could occur in this pregnancy too.

James Carstairs and Theresa Carstairs, what brings you to The Silent City? Brother Malachi's voice echos in our minds.

"I'm two months pregnant, I would like to have a check up here, to know that our child is alright, I have had three children previously, but one can never be too sure." I softly say, my hand fluttering to my stomach, a sudden fear of miscarrying coming to the front of my mind. What if everything with Eliza is not alright? What if this is not a viable pregnancy? What if the test was faulty? What is she never even existed at all?

Very well, follow me if you will. Brother Malachi's voice echoing in my head pulls me from my thoughts.

"Would it be possible for us to see Brother Enoch? When Tessa was pregnant the first two times when I was a part of The Brotherhood it was I who helped her throughout her pregnancies and oversaw the birth of her children, it was easier for her to be here as I was familiar to her, it would mean a great deal to both of us if we could deal with Brother Enoch, whom we are both familiar with." Jem explains as Brother Malachi leads us through The Silent City, until we reach a familiar room, with great big double wooden doors. Inside the room is a stone slab along with trays of herbs, potions, steles and many other things. I haven't been here since I was pregnant with Lucie and it has not changed one bit.

Yes, that can be arranged, wait here. Brother Malachi tells us, and turns without a sound, and leaves.

I take a seat on the stone slab, Jem right beside me our hands interlinked. We only wait about 10 minutes, before a hooded figure in parchment colored robs steps into the room soundlessly.

Good afternoon James, Theresa, I have been told congratulations are in order, you are expecting. Brother Enoch says, approaching the stone slab.

"Yes, thank you, we are." Jem proudly says.

The Angel has blessed us all with another Shadowhunter, praise be. Brother Enoch says.

"Yes indeed." I quietly say, looking down at my stomach, praying to The Angel that Eliza is alright, I could not bear it if anything happened to her.

Shall we get on with the examination? Brother Enoch asks. I nod, and lie back on the stone slab, wincing as I come into contact with the cold stone. I pull up my shirt leaving my swollen stomach exposed. Though I may only be 2 months, I am showing considerably for this early in the pregnancy, it never occurred to me until now, but perhaps we have been blessed with two babies.

Over the next half hour or so, Brother Enoch carries out a complete examination on me, testing my blood, feeling my stomach, asking about my symptoms and much more.

Finally, after almost 40 minutes, Brother Enoch steps back and draws back his hood, as Jem helps me into a sitting position once again.

You and your child are in perfect health, Theresa, the child is growing very well and developing perfectly, you are two months along, almost three, you are due on the 14th of July. Brother Enoch informs us. Thank God Eliza is alright, I can relax now.

"Oh thank God." Jem quietly says, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. He was clearly very worried too, but thankfully we had no need to be.

Would you like to know the sex? Brother Enoch asks.

"Yes, we would love to!" Jem exclaims, barely able to contain his excitement.

It's a boy.

Henry Nathaniel Carstairs.