Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the Potter-verse.

Chapter Thirteen

The pair stepped inside and both looked round in bewilderment.

"Is this a trick?" shouted Anne over the noise.

"Maybe it's the wrong common room," said Draco sincerely confused.

The cause for their bewilderment was simply thus: the Slytherin common room had been turned into a disco.

"What's going on?" asked Anne.

"Oh, it's simple really," said Luna who suddenly appeared out of the writhing crowd of dancers. She smiled blithely. "I've been crowned an honorary Slytherin. They're holding a party in my honor."

"What?" shrieked Anne with her mouth open.

Blaise approached with an open can of muggle orange soda in his hand and slid his arm around Luna's waist.

"Alright, love?" he asked.

"How could this happen?" asked Anne. Draco merely looked at the dancing crowd with wide eyes.

Blaise shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm prince of Slytherin. I made it happen. Anything for my girl."

"But what about me?" asked Draco suddenly. "I'm supposed to be prince of Slytherin."

"Face it Draco—you're old news. Besides, you've got that unsightly, little, old man on your shoulder. Really, you ought to think about getting him removed."

"There is no little man on my shoulder!" yelled Draco.

"Whatever, man," said Blaise with a shrug. "Hey, we gotta split. This is our song."

Luna grinned up at Blaise as he whisked her away.

"I thought he hated her!" shrieked Anne.

"So did I!" said Draco.

"Do you think—" Anne paused. "Do you think we're in an alternate dimension?"

"I don't know. I suppose—I suppose it's possible."

"You know, I was a little suspicious when I saw Professor Snape reading love poems."

"Snape reads poetry?"

"Apparently."

"I think you're right. We must be in an alternate dimension."

"But how did it happen?"

"I don't know. But I know who we could ask. Come on."

Meanwhile in Dumbledore's office, the headmaster and head of Slytherin were having a very enlightening discussion.

"See this?" said Snape holding a vial aloft.

"Ummm... liquid sugar? Can I have some?" asked the headmaster with eagerly reaching fingers.

"No, you fool!" Snape quickly snatched the vial out of Dumbledore's hands. "This is a vial of synthesized liquid endorphins! How could you not tell the difference?"

"Oh," said Dumbledore and he seemed to fold in on himself in his disappointment. "Well, isn't that nice?" he said in a bored tone of voice.

Snape rolled his eyes. "Obviously not," he snarled, "and if you're going to take that tone with me, I'm leaving!"

With a whirl of his robes, Snape exited the office. At the bottom of the stairs he bumped into the new herbology teacher, Professor Sprightly.

"I beg your pardon," said Professor Snape stiffening upon contact with another human being.

"Oh, that's quite alright," said Professor Sprightly beaming up at him. "I was just looking for you in your office, but you weren't there."

"Obviously," huffed Snape, crossing his arms.

"I was hoping for a little chat," she said shyly, drawing nearer and lightly touching his forearm.

Snape shuddered. "Sorry," he said, "I avoid having little chats with people who have little minds."

Professor Sprightly's face crumpled, yet she did not cry. "You don't know anything about me," she said. "How can you say that?"

"Because," sneered Professor Snape, "you wear robes that sparkle." He shuddered again and swept away from her.

In the library, Draco and Anne approached the girl sitting at the table farthest from the main doors.

"Granger," hissed Draco.

Hermione looked up with a raised brow. "Yes?" she said. "How can I help you?"

"We're in need of someone with your particular—talents."

"Which ones?" asked Hermione, pulling out a list. "If you're looking for an aura reading, you'll have to ask Lavender Brown or Pavarti Patil and if there's any rule-breaking to be done, you'll have to sign some papers I had my lawyer draw up."

Draco and Anne gave each other significant looks.

"Anne and I are in a predicament."

"Oh, you're pregnant?" asked Hermione looking at Anne. "That's not a problem. What we'll do is—"

"Shut up, Granger," said Draco, looking around furtively. "Nobody's pregnant."

"That's impossible," said Hermione shaking her head. "After all, someone's pregnant somewhere."

"Quit being a know-it-all for once in your life and answer some questions."

Hermione leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. "Shoot," she commanded with a shrug of her shoulders.

"How does someone tell if they're in an alternate dimension?"

Hermione just looked at him.

"Well?" demanded Draco.

"Oh, now you want me to be a know-it-all?" she smirked.

"Just answer the question," growled Draco.

"Please," added Anne.

Hermione returned the front legs of her chair to the ground and cocked her head, looking at the pair contemplatively.

"Have you walked into any vortexes?" she asked.

"No."

"Have you gone through any walls, tripped up or down the stairs or injured your head in a quidditch or other accident?"

"No."

"Gone through any mirrors?"

"No."

"Have you eaten any food or had anything to drink that made you feel—odd?"

"Define odd," snorted Draco.

"No," said Anne firmly, throwing Draco a look.

"Had any strange dreams?"

"No."

"Hmmmm," said Hermione. "Well, I'll give you my professional opinion."

"Yes?" said Draco leaning forward eagerly.

"You're definitely not in an alternate dimension," said Hermione. She glanced at her bare wrist. "I'm late for dinner," she said. "I'll send you my fee by owl." Hermione gathered her things and swept toward the main doors. Harry stopped her.

"Hey, are you ok?" he asked in a low voice. "I just saw you talking to Malfoy."

"I'm fine, Harry," said Hermione with a toss of her hair. "Besides, that strange friend of Luna's was with him. He's always a fraction more civil when she's around."

"Anne was with him? What did they want?"

"They think they're in an alternate dimension."

"But alternate dimensions don't exist."

"Oh, I know," said Hermione. "Are you coming to dinner, Harry?"

Harry looked at Anne and Draco who were talking in frantic whispers. "Not now. I've got to talk to Anne," he said grimly.

Draco and Anne sat at the table Hermione had just vacated and began whispering.

"But we must be in an alternate dimension," said Anne. "Otherwise—well, it just can't be true that—that Luna—" Anne paused and muffled a sob.

"I'm sorry," said Draco looking stricken. "I didn't know—" He paused and tentatively brushed his hand against Anne's which rested in her lap. "I didn't know you loved Blaise," he continued.

Anne barked out a laugh despite her tears. "In love with Blaise?" she said. "No, it's not that." She sniffed.

"What is it then?"

"Draco, don't you remember?" asked Anne sadly. "Luna is an honorary Slytherin."

"Oh, that."

"Yes, that."

"I'm sorry," said Draco.

"I just don't know what to do," said Anne, her hands fluttering nervously. "I mean, she's my best friend. I ought to be happy that my best friend fell in love and became an honorary Slytherin, but I can't. I just can't help hating her for it."

Draco took her hand.

"Am I a horrible person?" Anne asked.

"Well," began Draco slowly, "I don't think—"

"Anne?" It was Harry. "Are you alright?" he asked. "What's going on?"

Anne stiffened and she averted her eyes, looking at the tabletop.

"Nothing that concerns you, Potter," snarled Draco, dropping Anne's hand and jumping out of his seat.

Harry rolled his eyes. "No need for dramatics, Malfoy. I was asking a simple question."

"She doesn't want to talk to you," Draco said.

"How do you know?" growled Harry.

They were interrupted by the soft fluttering of wings as an owl landed on the table in front of Anne. A sudden shriek pierced the air.

"An owl!" howled Madame Pince rushing toward them. "In my library!"

The owl was startled into taking off, but Anne was able to snatch the note from its talons beforehand.

"Get out!" Madame Pince yelled at the owl.

While Harry, Draco and the good Madame Librarian were occupied with the catastrophe of the owl, Anne quickly slipped out of the room and read the note. Stuffing it into her pocket, she hurried to the dungeons and slipped into Snape's office.

"Sir?" she said.

Professor Snape glowered at her from behind his desk.

"I have a solution to your problem," he said, holding aloft a vial of a clear liquid.

"Already?" asked Anne. "You discovered a solution within an hour?"

"Don't be ridiculous," said Snape. "After I finished my book of verse, it took me a mere five minutes to discover a solution and another ten to brew it. I was going to ask Dumbledore if I could use some of the students as test subjects, but then I decided that I'm too brilliant to make mistakes."

"Sir," breathed Anne, "you're a genius!"

"I know," said Snape.

"You should marry Hermione Granger, sir. You would have absolutely brilliant children."

Snape turned green and looked like he was going to be sick. "Blerg," he gurgled as he shuddered in horror.

"Are you alright, Professor?" asked Anne.

Professor Snape gave one final shudder and composed himself. "I will be sending this first dose to your father," he said.

"Thank you, sir," said Anne, "but what does it do?"

Snape shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm telling him it will make him invincible."

"Oh," said Anne with a nod and a grin. "Thank you, sir."

"You're welcome."