Disclaimer: Characters and realm belong to Tamora Pierce.

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When Raoul walked into the courtroom, his eyes instantly searched for Jai's form. When Kel's maid, Lalasa, had informed them that Joren was the one on trial for kidnapping her, he instantly wondered how Jai was taking the news. He hadn't seen her since they'd left her fief, and when he didn't see her or any of the rest of her family, he felt disappointment flooding through him. Scolding himself for wanting to see her, he sat down next to Kel and Lalasa and waited for the trial to begin. Just as he'd given up on seeing her, a side door opened and Vinson walked in with Jai on his arm. She wore a charcoal grey dress that shimmered between a dark silvery grey and black. Black pearls wrapped around her neck, a large black opal embedded at the neck and a matching bracelet graced her wrist. Her face was expressionless, and she looked like a doll put up as a display of the Stone Mountain and Vinson's wealth. She didn't once look in his direction, instead she silently sat down next to Vinson several rows in front and to the left of him. When another noble sat down next to Vinson and began speaking to him, Jai finally turned and looked straight at him, sending him a small, tight smile before turning around once again.

As the trial proceeded and Joren's sentence of simply a fine was given, Raoul sensed Kel tensing next to him and realized she was not going to take this news well. When she confronted the monarchs, he suggested she go in private, and despite his desire to go search out Jai, accompanied Kel in to talk to them. After the King had assured Kel he would try and change the law, Kel returned to her room, while Raoul stayed behind.

"I thought she was quieter then Alanna," Jon said as soon as the door closed behind Kel.

"She is by and large, but she hates bullying. She's got a hearty sense of right and wrong and it weighs on her enough to make her speak out," answered Raoul.

"She doesn't like me does she?"

Raoul shrugged. "You put her on probation, Jon. I know, I know you had to, but she hates compromise almost as much as Alanna, particularly when it comes to principles. You may have begun to turn her around though. She likes Roald anyways, and she believes in taking orders, a lot more then Alanna does. Wyldon drilled that into her."

Jon sighed. "Well, maybe this will help win her over. It better, considering all I'm going to have to put into changing this law."

"Please, Jon. You love an excuse to wind up the blue-bloods. Besides, Wyldon will probably be on your side. Despite himself, he's quite fond of Kel."

"What?" Thayet said. "The stump likes Kel?"

"The stump?" Jon asked, looking at his wife in surprise.

Thayet blushed. "Sorry, Alanna has been referring to him as the Stump in her letters. Apparently, that's what her mouthy squire refers to him as."

Raoul laughed. "That sounds about right considering the stories I've heard about Neal from his cousin. But Wyldon certainly respects Kel. She's the kind of knight he likes after all—competent, hard-working, respectful."

"The last one being the key," Jon said with a grin. "You're squire certainly is the perfect person to follow Alanna. Until today I wasn't sure she even had emotions. She certainly proves you don't have to be like Alanna to be a female knight."

After leaving the monarchs, Raoul decided to check on Kel before worrying about Jai. He walked into her room to find a mess of feathers, Kel's griffin squawking and Kel's sparrows in a tizzy. Once he'd talked to Kel and helped her clean up her room, he went back to his study, closed the door and sat down in his desk chair, putting his head in his hands.

"Long day?" Jai asked.

Raoul looked up with a start. "What? How? What?"

Jai smiled and moved across the room and sat in Raoul's lap. She placed her hand on his cheek and said, "I wanted to come see you. I heard you talking to Kel. I figured waiting in here was better then waiting in the hall or letting Kel know I was here."

Raoul smiled and touched his forehead to hers. "Fair enough. How have you been?"

"I had two more glorious weeks at my fief, then father made me return here, where I had a few less glorious weeks. Things are starting to look up now though," Jai said, moving in to kiss him.

Raoul pulled away. "We need to talk about this."

"I don't want to talk about this. I don't want to talk about anything," Jai said, leaning forward again.

Turning away, Raoul said, "This isn't right. We can't do this. You're too young for me. You're going to marry someone else. We can't do this. Just listen to me."

"No," Jai said sharply. "You listen to me. I am 22. I can do math. I understand that you are old enough to be my father, but you're not my father. Which is exactly why I like you. You talk to me about battle strategies and diplomatic treaties. You look at me and you see me. Not just what I look like, but actually me. I'm not just a piece of property to decorate your arm, to show your wealth and power. You don't just want me to look pretty so other men will be jealous. I know I am betrothed. Believe me. I understand I will spend the rest of my life with Vinson, which is exactly why I want to spend the time that I do have left with someone I actually like and who actually likes me. I get that you're a knight and there is this noble code, but I'm asking you to just let me be happy while I can be. Please."

When Raoul didn't respond, Jai stood up angrily, straightening her shoulders and lifting her chin. "Fine," she said coldly. "Fine." She walked out of the room and slammed the door behind her.

Sighing, Raoul rubbed his temples, as always unsure of what had just happened. He waited, expecting her to come back, but she didn't. He wasn't sure what he would do when she did come back. The same old argument went round and round his brain over the next few days as he made excuses to stay in his study, hoping she would show. He missed her happy chatter, her laugh, the swishing noise her skirt made, her presence.

During his fifth day of internal struggle, he was looking out his window at the courtyard in front of the Own's barracks. He saw a woman in a sea green dress talking animatedly to one of the female members of the Riders and a few members of the Own, more then a few of whom were doubled over in laughter. Raoul realized instantly that the woman was Jai. He could tell by the way she waved her hands and cocked her head, not to mention the easily identifiable brightness of her hair. As he watched them all talking, and watched some of the men obviously flirting with her, he decided once and for all that his "honorable" self could talk a hike. Walking outside quickly and over to the group, he stopped next to Jai and raised an eyebrow at his men. "Aren't you all suppose to be training right now?" he asked.

Looking suitably chastened, the men scattered off in various directions after saying good-bye to Jai and the Rider woman, who turned out to be Maggie.

Looking at Raoul with a bemused smile on her face, Maggie said airily, "I think there is probably something I am supposed to do as well."

With those words, she kissed Jai on the cheek, winked at Raoul and walked towards the Riders' training area.

"Lord Raoul," Jai said civilly, dropping a curtsey and moving to walk away.

Raoul reached out and grabbed her hand, not caring who saw. "Jai, please don't. I want to talk to you."

She looked up at him, her face impassive, searching his face. When she didn't say anything, he added, "Jai, please."

"Fine," she said quietly, removing her hand from his. "I'll come by your study in a little while. We shouldn't be seen going there together. It wouldn't be…proper."

She turned away, picking up the hem of her skirt daintily and walking away.

Several hours later, Jai still hadn't shown up, and Raoul was increasingly unsure of himself. Passing around in his study, he thought to himself, What if she is no longer interested? What should I say? Maybe this is wrong.

Just when he was about to give up, he heard the sound of her heels clicking down the hallway, then a sharp knocking came on his door. Dragging his hand distractedly through his curls, he leaned on his desk, trying to look casual, before he said, "Come in."

Jai walked in and closed the door behind her, but refrained from walking further into the room. "You wanted to talk to me?"

"Come on Jai. Don't be like that."

"What do you expect? You gave me every reason to expect that you were interested and then you pull out some nonsense excuse to end things. So, yes. I'm angry. In fact, I'm very angry. In fact, I—"

Deciding that this rant was not going to end any time soon on its own, Raoul crossed the room and kissed Jai hard, a hand on each of her biceps, pulling her insistently towards him. When she tried to speak again, he smothered her words with another kiss. Eventually, she gave in, wrapping her arms around him. Slipping his hands down, he picked her up, carrying her over to his chair and sitting down, settling her easily into his lap. He resumed kissing her, but was more gently this time. He untied the ribbon in her hair and when it fell down around her shoulders, he slid his fingers through it, feeling the softness against his palm.

Pulling back, he stroked Jai's cheek with his thumb. "Am I forgiven?" he asked, nuzzling her neck.

Jai laughed and leaned her head back, revealing more flesh to his ministrations. "I suppose that depends," she said lazily.

"On what?" he asked, trailing kisses along her collarbone.

She put a hand on either side of his head, forcing him to look her in the eye. "On how long before I have to worry about you talking yourself out of this again."

Raoul laughed at her bluntness. "You know I really do think this is wrong, but honestly, I very much doubt I will be able to stop myself from doing this again. Besides, I am basically incapable of saying no to you."

Jai kissed him again before sliding off his lap. "I have to go before anyone begins wondering where I am. We'll pick this up later."

Raoul grabbed her wrist and pulled her back again. "You aren't going anywhere yet."

Jai giggled. "I have to go," she murmured between kisses, but made no move to leave. Eventually, she pulled away and settled her head in the crook of his neck.

"What have you been up to the last few weeks?" she asked sleepily.

"We've been helping out a town that got hit by an earthquake and had some mud slides."

"I don't know how you deal with all that death and destruction every day without just getting overwhelmed."

"We just have to do what you can."

"You mean you never get disheartened by it all?"

"Some days are hard. Like the day we stayed at your fief."

"Why?"

Raoul told her about the children in the spidrens nest and about the decisions that had meant they would get there a little later then the would have otherwise. He talked about the decisions he had to live with that cost people lives and found himself telling her things he'd never told anyone before. She just listened, never interrupting like so many people did with the obvious insistences that he couldn't of known or it wasn't his fault. She just offered the comfort of her presence. He asked her about her family and she talked about the few memories she had of her mother, mostly of the two of them spending time alone at the fief.

After a little while, they both stopped talking, enjoying the silence and occasional kisses. As Raoul felt Jai's rhythmic and deep breaths across his neck, he realized the girl had fallen asleep. Even knowing she could potentially get in a lot of trouble, he couldn't bring himself to wake her when she looked so serene. The bells rang several time, but Raoul didn't move until a sharp knock sounded at his door.

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Ugh I'm more then a little not liking this story--plot picks up eventually, but i have to get there. My brain is not working so well. Please, please review. Suggestions or encouragement are very much appreciated right now.