Raoul leapt off the bed immediately. "What in the name of Mithros is going on?"

Jai sat up and put her elbows on her knees. "You started it, not me," she said, pouting slightly.

Considering his dreams, Raoul suspected she was telling the truth. "Well, what are you doing naked in my bed?"

"I don't know about the naked part," Jai said, looking down at herself. "I decided to sneak over here because I couldn't sleep. You were sleeping and you looked so peaceful, so I decided to just climb into bed with you to sleep and I had clothes on, breeches and a shirt and a really tight breast band, which you did a really good job of getting off by the way. Next thing I know, I'm naked and you are, you know."

Raoul rubbed his face with his hands, trying to slow his breathing. His attempts were disrupted by the feeling of Jai's hands on his thighs. He'd been so close. Maybe he should just. No. He pulled away and tugged on a pair of breeches, refusing to listen to Jai's sounds of protest.

"You need to get dressed and go back to your room. You will get in trouble if you aren't there," Raoul said, trying to put all of his authority as a commander behind the words.

"No one will know. Nana is supposed to be my chaperone. My father trusts her. She was his servant first, before she was my mother's, so he believes her loyalty is to him. It isn't. Now come back here. You can't leave me hanging like that."

"No," Raoul said. "I'm serious Jai. I'm not bedding you. Please."

Jai cocked her head, then smiled. "Tell you what. Let me sleep here tonight, and I'll lay off the bedding demands for awhile at least."

Raoul sighed and pulled a shirt out of his dresser, tossing it over to Jai. Jai giggled and stood up on the bed, revealing her body for one last instant before she tugged the shirt over her head and let it fall down around her knees. She sat back down on the bed and slid under the covers.

Raoul got under the covers next to her, leaving on his breeches. He kissed her, then turned her on her side and curled up around her. He kissed her on the neck and slid his arm around her, resting his hand high on her stomach. He breathed her scent in, a mixture of lavender and something earthier. Matching his breathing to hers, he soon fell into a sleep more peaceful then any he'd had in years.

----

The next morning, Raoul woke at his usual early hour. When he opened his eyes slowly, he yelped at the sight of Jai's wide ice blue eyes as close as possible to his dark ones.

"You're cute when you sleep," she said with a grin.

"How are you so awake?" he grumbled, flipping onto his back and pulling her on to his chest.

Jai giggled and leaned down to kiss him, her hair falling like a curtain around them. He slid one of his hand around the back of her neck and the other hand moved to the middle of her back, his thumb making small circles.

"I wish you didn't have to go," Raoul said without thinking.

Jai smiled sadly. "I wish I didn't have to either, but I do," she said and slid off him, moving to get out of bed.

Raoul wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her back. "What if you didn't?"

"Didn't leave? Well, I'd get a worse beating then the last one I got that's for sure. Father's wife would probably start checking to see that I was still a virgin as well, which is really something I'd like to avoid."

"What if you stayed and went to the Temple of the Goddess for protection? You'd be safe there. You wouldn't have to marry Vinson and you're father couldn't get you."

"And then what?" Jai demanded angrily, as she jerked out of Raoul's grip. "I live my life behind the four walls of the temple? Never allowed to leave the grounds?"

"You wouldn't have to stay forever. You could start your own life. I'd be willing to help you," Raoul said, sitting up and reaching for Jai, only to have her slide out of bed and begin dressing

"Do you think I haven't thought of that? I know how easy it would be to run, but I can't. I can't just run. I told you there are circumstances. I have obligations. I guess I should have been clearer. I am marrying Vinson. End of discussion," she declared forcefully. She wrapped her hair up and pulled her hat on, finishing her disguise as a male servant.

Raoul hopped out of bed and caught her before she could storm out. "Jai, stop. I didn't mean to upset you. I only want what's best for you."

Jai softened instantly, allowing herself be wrapped in his arms. "I'm sorry," she said. "I shouldn't have gotten so angry. I just don't want you to think that something can change. I will marry Vinson. You can't be the knight in shining armor and save me. What you can do is make me happy for the present."

Raoul nodded, his throat too clenched to speak. Finally, he just leaned down and kissed her, tightening his grip around her.

"I have to go," she said, a sad smile on her face. "I'll see you during the Progress," she added, before leaving his rooms.

Raoul spent the next few days preparing for the Progress and trying not to think about Jai. For the first time, he looked forward to the beginning of the Progress. As the days dragged on, his desire to hold Jai and kiss her grew stronger, and his resolve not to bed her dissolved more and more.

At last the day arrive and the King's Own lined up in their shiny uniforms around the royal family. Raoul looked around hoping to catch a glimpse of Jai. At last he found her, looking annoyed, no doubt because she was sitting sidesaddle. Her face softened though, as she leaned over to pet the mane of the young mare she rode. Looking closer at the mare, Raoul realized she was one of Wyldon's horses. Clearly, Jai's father had decided it was worth letting Jai be happy if her new horse would help display his wealth. Jai's dress also loudly proclaimed the state of the Stone Mountain treasury. Intricate embroidery covered her silver and white gown, along with sapphires and rubies. Her necklace was so heavy with jewels that Raoul wasn't sure how she managed to keep her head up. She looked up from her horse and caught his eye, sending him a big smile.

As the court began its great ride, Raoul tried to keep his looks in Jai's direction to a minimum. The day went by agonizingly slowly, but at last it drew to a stop for the night. As he and Kel put up the tents for the night, Raoul decided it was probably best for Jai to come find him. At his height, he couldn't exactly sneak around unobserved, and the girl had a knack for not being noticed when she didn't want to be.

As Raoul was sitting around a campfire eating with his men, he felt something hit him in the back of the head. Confused he looked around, but didn't see anything but darkness. After this occurred two more times, he finally got up to investigate. As he left the circle of light from the campfire, a small, delicate hand caught his own and tugged him in the direction of the forest. Once they were deep enough to avoid being stumbled upon, Jai turned and threw herself into Raoul's arms, kissing him hard. He responded in kind, pushing her up against a tree trunk and lifting her higher off the ground. She dragged his tunic and undershirt over his head as he undid her laces, both desperate to feel each other's skin against their own. Wrapping her legs around his waist, she reached for the laces of his breeches. He slid his hands under her skirt and up her thighs, pressing even closer to her.

When she moved to ease his breeches off, he grabbed her wrist and pulled back. "No, stop," he said.

"Ugh! I'd really hoped you were over this chivalrous nonsense," Jai said. "Please, Raoul. You can't do this to me. You can't do this to yourself. We both want this."

Raoul shook his head, trying to clear it. "No," he murmured, pushing her hair out of her face and kissing her gently.

"Why are you so against this?" Jai asked, her frustration clear.

"Because you yourself said your father's wife could begin checking you, and I don't even want to think about what would happen if they found out you were a virgin."

"They won't."

"That's not all. I just can't. I'm already too attached as it is. So, are you. I can't stop being around you. I can't stop kissing you, but so far I can manage to stop myself from bedding you. If we make love, I'm afraid it will make the separation so much worse."

Jai opened her mouth to protest, but stopped when she saw the emotion on his face. Finally, she leaned her head on his chest, sliding her legs down so she was standing on her own. Raoul felt the tears roll down her cheeks and on to his chest. "I'm sorry," she finally whispered. "I never thought you would really feel anything more than a passing fancy for me. I didn't mean to hurt you. I knew how I felt about you when I started this, and that it wasn't really possible for me to get more attached and that I needed some memories to get me through the life I had before me. I never thought you would return the feelings in any real way. I'm so sorry."

"What do you mean you knew how you felt from the beginning? You mean from the time at your fief?"

Jai shook her head and looked up at him. "Before that. We met before that ball. I was thirteen. Vinson and Joren and Vinson's brother, Barner, had locked me in a supplies closet and were trying to drown the puppy Lord Padriag had given me. You heard me yelling and let me out and got me to tell you what was happening. You gave me a hug and ruffled my hair and told me it was going to be alright. Then you stopped them and gave them a lecture on respecting animals and girls. You reported them to Lord Wyldon and I asked you to find my puppy a new home and you said you would."

Jai paused, blushing slightly, but said, "I fell for you right then and there. When I sat down next to you, I started that conversation to see if you were everything I thought you were, and figuring that was the best way to get you interested if it was."

"That was you?" Raoul said in surprise.

"Some kids have spots on their face, alright? And I gained weight before I grew taller. It wasn't my fault."

Raoul laughed. "That's not what I meant at all, although you do look quite a bit different now. I just can't believe I didn't figure out that was you."

Jai shrugged. "It was a long time ago, and I don't think I ever said I was Joren's sister. Anyways, my point is if you want this to end now, I understand."

"No, Jai. That's not what I want. I don't know what I want. I just," Raoul let the words hang, unsure of how to finish. Finally, he just leaned down and kissed Jai, losing himself in the moment.

----

They continued in this way through the whole of the Progress. They stole hidden kisses in dark corners and occasionally dared to spend a whole night together. They avoided anything like the conversation they'd had the first night, both firmly believing that denial and avoidance was the best solution for the present. Jai no longer pushed Raoul to bed her, but her desire, and his, was always evident. Still, Raoul continued to hold back at the last minute continuously, straining his self-control to its utmost limits. However, he told himself that holding back that last bit would somehow help him. He denied that every kiss brought them closer, that every time he fell asleep wrapped around her he fell more in love with her. He told himself their separation would hurt, but it would be bearable, if only he held them back from that last step.

--

I would say one or two more chapters of romancey stuff and then the action slowly begins and then speeds up pretty quickly.

Thank you very much to the people who reviewed. Please keep it up! I started another story that I really like (Prince Liam's Lioness if you want to read it), so the updates for this may slow down a bit, but I promise I'll finish it.....