Warning to all, there be some angst up ahead...
Chapter XVII: The Point of No Return
Dormie had returned far quicker than Hatter had hoped and with better news than the teashop owner had dared to expect. The young man's heart had soared as the dwarfish man told him in his high, squeaky voice that Dodo was interested in making the deal. Hatter figured the allure of holding the Stone of Wonderland must have been too great an offer for the avaricious man to pass up.
He patiently listened to hear an outline of terms and conditions as was Dodo's usual wont. Much to his surprise, there were none. Apparently, they would be sending an agent along to escort them to meet with none other than Caterpillar himself. Hatter even had the choice of the meeting place, which he was to relay to Dormie who would then spirit the information away to Dodo. Hatter knew he could not sit around in the city waiting for the agent. He had to return to the fortress, otherwise Alice would head back to the casino on another daft and ill-fated mission of rescue. So, while he was wary of telling Dormie about the Kingdom of the Knights, he knew there really was no other choice in the matter. He kept quiet about Charlie, however.
Once the exchange finished, Hatter had immediately begun jogging back to the boat. All the while, his sense of dark intuition began whispering that something about the whole deal was off. The ease with which the deal had been struck somehow did not sit well with him. Dodo would have to be seething with rage and resentment towards him and most definitely Alice, considering their last meeting ended up with him being kicked into a wall by the petite oyster girl. But there was no time to undo what had been done. He would simply have to stop second-guessing himself. He was just feeling jumpy and apprehensive since everything else in his life of late seemed to be going wrong. Now that something was going right for once, it was only natural he treat it with a degree of suspicion.
Once he reached the other side of the lake, he secured the boat by tying the rope around the thick trunk of a tree, but he did not bother draping huge leaves over it. His heart was beginning to throb with worry, tormenting him with the thought that Alice might not be there when he returned. He hoped that cooling her heels with Charlie back at the encampment might also cool that driving, stubborn, reckless urge of hers to go galloping back to the casino.
But, this was Alice Hamilton, a girl who, once she got an idea in her head, would apparently stop at nothing to see it come to fruition even if it involved possible decapitation. Honestly, such determination would be admirable if it did not seem to constantly put her in mortal peril. Of course, this was also a girl who killed demons and vampires for a living. She was accustomed to dealing with mortal peril.
Not really the type of girl you should be falling for, mate, that dratted voice called Common Sense noted ironically. Well, it was too late for that; far too late.
Fortunately, the sun was still sitting in the sky, bathing the world in a deep golden glow when Hatter made it back to the encampment. Unfortunately, neither Alice nor Charlie was in sight. There was a pile of fresh kindling sitting in the fire pit, so it was evident that someone had been here not too long ago. His stomach clenched and his heart dropped as the worst conclusions jumped to the forefront of his thoughts.
But then he heard the faint sounds of Charlie's voice singing that loony song of his amidst intermittent snores. Hatter quickly made his way to the old man's hammock, and shook his head in exasperation at seeing the old knight snuggled up in the contraption with his dirty old stuffed bear clasped tightly to his chest.
How could the knight be sleeping when he was supposed to be watching over Alice? Hatter blew out a frustrated, hissing breath through gritted teeth and leaned down close to the knight's snoring face. "Charlie!" he shouted in a volume which was better reserved for someone ten feet away rather than a hairsbreadth.
The knight's eyes snapped open and he unleashed a shocked and frightened yelp as he lunged away from the offending, loud voice. The hammock tipped, sending the old man tumbling unceremoniously onto the ground.
Hatter did not feel one bit of sympathy for the man as he groaned in pain and pulled himself up from the dirty ground. He merely glared at the knight as he said, "You're supposed to be keeping an eye on Alice, Charlie."
The knight froze, a sheepish expression overcoming his face, before feebly raising up a finger in his defense. "I know what you're thinking, but, I wasn't asleep. I merely let my soul lift out of its mortal shell to stand sentry on a higher plane." He then smiled apologetically as he dusted himself off.
Hatter waved the excuse away. "Where's Alice?" he asked in a tightly controlled voice.
"Oh, I took the lady to see the armory earlier and she decided she wanted to brush up on her swordsmanship skills. She's around here somewhere, I imagine," Charlie replied, glancing around the encampment. With a nervous chuckle he then added, "I suppose I shall begin roasting the rest of the meat for supper, then…yes, I think I'll do that."
Hatter sighed heavily as the knight slunk away, no doubt wanting to put some distance between himself and the displeased teashop owner. The news that Alice had gotten hold of a weapon was not exactly as encouraging as Charlie must have thought it would be. It sounded to Hatter as if she was preparing for a more violent infiltration of the casino than her last visit. But night had not yet fallen, and so there was still a chance the girl had kept to her word and was patiently waiting for his return. All he would have to do was find her, and hope that his news of the Resistance's promise of aid would appease her.
"Alice!" he called out.
He started walking with no specific direction in mind, trying to think of where he would go if he wanted to play around with a sword. Considering that he had never actually played with a sword, he did not really know where an appropriate spot to practice fighting with a blade would be. He called out her name a few more times, unconsciously venturing into the woods ringing around the encampment.
Each time he called and received no answer, his heart skipped a beat. Panic and worry, two emotions he had just about had enough of, were starting to gain momentum. But then, after about the fifth time he called for her, she answered.
"Up here!" he heard her yell. It came from the direction of a narrow, jagged pathway leading up a very steep hill. His body screamed its exhaustion and hunger to him, telling him there was no way it was going up some barmy hill after all he had put it through today. Hatter studiously ignored his body's complaints. Alice was up there, and he was going to her. Period.
He huffed the entire way up and cursed her choice of practice area. Everything in his body hurt, even places he did not think could get muscle cramps. Bloody hell, she made it up here and she didn't get any rest at all last night. Slayer stamina must be amazing. He could not help but let his thoughts stray towards what other things Slayer stamina could be good for.
"Good news," he announced when he came close to the top. "The Resistance wants to help. They're sending an agent along who will take us to see Caterpillar."
The hill smoothed out into a wide plateau which afforded a stunning vista of the Kingdom of the Knights in all its ancient, crumbling glory. Alice was standing close to the other edge, a long, slim bladed sword held in her right hand. She was wearing the purple coat again, the ends of which flapped in the breeze around her upper thighs. Her dark hair swirled around her as she turned around to face him and Hatter was immediately struck mute at the vision she presented. Limned by dying sunlight, the girl looked like something so rare and too beautiful for this world. She seemed almost to be lit up within as the dazzling gold of the sun raked over her fair skin, making it luminous.
The shiny little pearls…Oh, she shined as if she held a mountain of pearls inside her. He wanted to capture this moment. How long he stood staring at her, he did not know. An eternity could have passed for all he noticed. His heart was beating fiercely, singing almost.
"Hatter?" she inquired, her eyes glinting with something akin to amusement.
He snapped out of his daze and shook his head. "Um, that's quite a steep hill," was his rather inelegant reply.
A ghost of a smile flitted over her lips and she slowly approached him. "I just needed to clear my thoughts a bit. It's been a somewhat overwhelming day," she confided wearily, rubbing at the bridge of her nose.
His gaze drifted down to the sword in her hand. How was it that her hand holding a weapon looked so fitting? She was such a small, dainty little thing one would think weapons of warfare would look completely out of place with her. But Hatter knew the façade of fragility was just that: a façade. Underneath that ingenious pretense was a frame of tempered steel. She might bend, but she would not break. His heart twisted at those thoughts.
"You need a sword for that?" he asked, his voice clipped and hoarse.
The girl shrugged, tipping the sword up as if to inspect the blade. Her blue eyes traveled its length before sliding over to meet Hatter's gaze. "Practicing the fighting skills is like any other form of exercise. It helps clear the mind and bring about focus. Slayers are naturally attuned to all weapons, and we treat them almost like extensions of our own bodies. When we spar or fight, we can let our instincts take over. It's like conscious thought isn't necessary, almost," she explained in a solemn voice.
"Oh," Hatter commented uneasily.
She lowered the blade and dropped her gaze to the ground. In a small murmur, he heard her say, "I was beginning to fear you weren't coming back." Her voice carried a strong flavor of anguish.
He bristled, his pessimistic mind completely misunderstanding the statement. "Still don't trust me?" he grumbled sulkily.
Her head responded with the briefest of shakes before she raised her face up and he immediately felt contrite when he saw her blue eyes shine with wetness. "I was worried. I was afraid something had happened to you."
Hatter felt that curious sensation again, like all his organs were somersaulting inside of him.
She wiped at her eyes and then abruptly steered the subject away from her concerns for his well-being. "So, uh, this agent…how soon until he gets here?"
"I don't know. They can move pretty fast when they need to, I'd wager, but I probably wouldn't expect him until morning," he answered. In any case, he hoped the agent would not turn up until morning. Hatter could stand to have a little bit of peace with Alice. Almost the sum of their time together had been taken up by evading or, in some cases, diving headfirst, into perilous situations. The previous night they had spent talking at the campfire had been a nice respite, but it had been somewhat spoiled by the mind-blowing story Alice had told him about herself and her job back in her home world.
"You're going to join them, aren't you?" Alice remarked knowingly, her head turned back towards the view of the Kingdom of the Knights. "You're going to fight alongside them." Her voice was soft, resigned.
Hatter sighed, his own eyes traveling to take in the stunning view of those enormous monuments. Seeing their solemn beauty rekindled the hope and purpose which he had believed had been destroyed years ago. Yes, he was going to fight alongside them, and possibly die, if he had to. He had calmly accepted that fact in a way the Hatter from a week ago never would have.
"I have to try," he told her grimly. "I've lived my life playing both sides of the court. I thought it was the only way I could stay alive." He shook his head in self-directed disgust. "I convinced the Hearts I was working for them while I fed their enemies. Those days are over…I can't do it anymore." He swallowed and clenched his fists, suddenly overcome with a sense of shame and remorse.
Alice's soft touch made him freeze. She was touching his cheek, gently coaxing him to face her. Her eyes glittered with compassionate understanding. "Hatter, don't tell me that you believe any of that shit Dodo said about you was true. I may have just met the guy once, but it seems to me he's got a hell of a lot less integrity than you. Not to mention, his job seems a great deal comfier and safer than yours. I mean, playing double agent means double the danger. Not many people would have the guts to do that, least of all Dodo," she asserted, her voice contrarily hard and gentle at the same time.
Hatter vehemently shook his head. "No, you don't understand, I wasn't even sure where my loyalties really lay. I used to think I would just throw my lot in with the winning side," he admitted. Now she was sure to turn away from him, but he had been unable to stop the stream of words. It was almost like they had been bursting to be free from his thoughts.
Alice cocked her head, her pondering eye raking over him. "Well," she said slowly. "Do you feel that way now?"
He shook his head. "No. Even if the Resistance may not win…I'm still with them," he declared.
The girl's soft pink lips curled up into a triumphant smile. "There it is, then," she simply stated. Her smile then tightened and her eyes darkened ominously. "And it looks like I'll be fighting alongside you." Her gaze drifted down to the sword in her hands.
Hatter blinked in astonishment for a few moments. His gut twisted with foreboding. "What? No, no, you don't have to do that, Alice. This isn't your fight," he insisted, a desperate note to his voice. He wanted her to stay thoroughly out of harm's way from this point until he could deliver her safely home. Well, of course, her home was no safer than Wonderland, less safe, even. But this was not her battle to fight.
"But it is," Alice countered. She did not sound argumentative, just firm and resigned, almost as if it this was a truth she had railed against herself and had only just come to grudgingly accepting it. "It's as much my fight as it is yours."
"If this is about your father…"
"It's not about my dad," Alice cut him off. "Well," she backtracked sheepishly, "it is partially about my father, but not completely. It's all the others, too…the oysters…my people."
Hatter almost slapped himself upside the forehead for totally overlooking the fact that the oysters were people from her world. He should have seen this coming. Perhaps he had seen it coming, but he would not allow himself to acknowledge it.
"But, Alice, they…" He searched for a plausible counter argument, anything to keep this precious little oyster away from all paths of war and death. "You don't even know them," he ended up lamely pointing out. The excuse was a pitiable one, and he was well aware of that.
The girl cocked an eyebrow. "And you are on speaking terms with every single one of those refugees, I take it?" she countered sardonically.
Damn it, Hatter silently swore. She had him there.
"You and I both know you don't fight for a cause merely on behalf of people you know or care about. What do you think I do on a nightly basis back in my world? My sister Slayers and I fight things which are largely written off as legends and myths, Hatter. Do you think, then, that we get recognition for what we do? Do you think that whenever we prevent an apocalypse we get a parade or a banquet in our honor?"
She turned away from him, then, stomping away in her frustration which could either be directed towards him or the grim facts of her life. She halted a few paces away from Hatter, her back turned to him and her body suddenly trembling with an inexplicable grief. "I've buried girls who've died saving the world…who've died to keep a world turning for billions of people they don't know and never would have. Billions of people who are never going to thank them for it. It's really unfair sometimes, you know." Her voice cracked and Hatter found himself at her side in an instant, his arms coming to wrap around her shoulders. She eased into his embrace, her body sagging against his as if she had been waiting for it all along.
"But it doesn't matter. Because, in the end, saving the world really does everyone a favor, including the Slayers," she continued, her voice becoming faintly ironic. "I know that saving these people seems somewhat less significant in retrospect, you know, in comparison to saving the world, but…they're my people, Hatter. I've sworn to defend and protect them."
Her words humbled him and though he still did not want her to fight this battle, he felt all his protests wither away under the weight of her conviction. His heart swelled up within his chest and he took a moment to just revel in the feel of her cocooned in his arms. It felt like she belonged there. "Alice," he whispered, uncertain of how to respond to all of that.
The girl wiped at her eyes and shook her head. "Wow, sorry, I didn't mean to get all creepy and intense like that. I think I'm really tired," she said softly.
"It's okay," he assured her, stroking her silky dark hair.
"Anyway, apparently that's the whole reason I'm in Wonderland," the girl muttered. "Fate and destiny, blah blah blah."
Hatter frowned, and a shudder of unease ran down his spine. "What do you mean?" He gently spun her around to face him, his voice deadly serious as he repeated the question.
The girl bit down on her lip. "Um, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to tell you about it," she mumbled awkwardly.
"You can't just throw around those words and then leave me hanging like that, Alice." He was hard pressed not to shake the answer out of the girl. Besides, she could toss him off the hill if she was so inclined, so he thought it best he keep his act of persuasion limited to a hard stare down.
The girl fidgeted uncomfortably under the intensity of his gaze before finally relenting. "Okay, so I may have…received some visits from one of your oh-so-charming deities during my stay here in Wonderland," she confessed.
Deities? What…oh, fuck me, she doesn't mean… "Alice," he said, closing his eyes. "Are you saying you've had visits from…the Cheshire?"
"Oh, so you do call it that," she mused.
Hatter's entire body went numb and his mouth dropped open. The noisy traffic of thought in his head silenced under the weight of this knowledge. His nerveless hands fell from Alice's shoulders to dangle at his sides.
"You're acting like that's a bad thing, and it's freaking me out," Alice remarked, her brow knitting together into a deep frown of concern.
"That's because it is a bad thing," Hatter asserted, surprised he was able to find his voice. Panic and despair quickly began ripping his gut to shreds. His legs suddenly felt wobbly, like someone had turned his bones to jelly.
"What?" Alice queried, clearly confused. "It's not evil, is it? Because it didn't feel evil to me…kind of annoying, though."
"Oh fuck, Alice," he cried. "Please, tell me you're joking. Tell me you didn't really get visited by the Cheshire." With the lack of anything more productive to do, he pulled his hat off and ran his shaking hands through his hair.
The girl's mouth opened, but all that came out was a huff of frustration. After a beat, she asked, "What, Hatter? What's so bad about being visited by the Cheshire?"
Hatter very nearly crushed his beloved hat with the strength of his right fist, which was currently tightly wound around the brim. "It's a very bad omen, Alice. You have to understand, I'm not really a superstitious man, okay. So when I tell you something is a bad omen, it's a bloody fucking horrible omen." Panic bubbled over like a pot of water left over the fire too long. He began to pace, his chest tightening and making it hard to draw breath.
"Will you calm down, please, and explain to me why this is a bad omen?" Alice requested. "And quit abusing your hat."
He drew in a deep breath and just barely managed to gain control over his raging nerves. He halted and turned around to face the girl. "In our history there've been heroes…people who've done great things in Wonderland. Some of these people are said to have been visited by the Cheshire who, it's said, gave them grand tasks or purposes."
"Okay, and…?" Alice pressed.
"They died, okay? They did the things they set out to do, but they always died either during or immediately after those things….except for one, and she came bloody close to losing her head," he informed her, his voice filled with distress.
"The Alice of Legend," Alice murmured.
Hatter nodded, his throat having grown tight and tangled with anxiety to the point where speech was temporarily impossible. He watched Alice absorb this information, her face curiously impassive. His torrent of emotions was so loud that it effectively drowned out whatever she might have been feeling.
"Well," Alice said tentatively. "If she lived, it stands to reason I will, too. I mean, it basically wants me to finish what she started, it seems."
Hatter groaned at hearing that. "No." He looked up at her, feeling his heart crack at the sight of her.
"Stop looking at me like that," she snapped. "I'm not going to drop dead." She lifted up the sword, flexing her wrist in such a way that the blade flipped around in her grasp.
"Alice, could, you, perhaps just sit this out...?" Hatter asked in a strained voice, walking up to her. He threaded his fingers with the hand which did not hold the sword and settled for wrapping his hand around the hand which was occupied by the hilt of the weapon.
The girl's eyes widened as if the suggestion was preposterous. "And leave you all to do the fighting by yourselves?" She paused for a moment, almost as if she were actually considering the idea. When she shook her head and shot him a defiant look, Hatter felt his heart sink. "No, I can't do that. Have you ever stopped to think that maybe it wouldn't be possible without me? Maybe I'm here to give you guys the edge you need…to…be your catalyst. I mean, how long have you guys been fighting against the queen? No offense, but it doesn't seem like you guys have made much headway in that regard."
Though it was harsh, her words rang with a morbid note of truth. The Resistance had been struggling to stay afloat for years under the might of the Queen of Hearts. But now that they had the Stone of Wonderland, there might be a chance for them to finally break free of those chains and end her tyrannical reign once and for all.
"We have the Stone of Wonderland," he reminded her.
Alice looked away and then back at him, her expression far more composed than his likely was. "But what if it's not enough? I'm not being arrogant here or anything, I'm just…ugh…I'm just dealing with the cards I've been dealt. And it seems like I've been given the card that says 'break the stalemate' or whatever." She sighed deeply. "I'm not saying I like it, okay? I just know from personal experience that sometimes fate throws some curveballs your way that you can't evade."
"I don't care," Hatter blurted, the words coming out before he even realized he had thought them.
"What?" Alice huffed in amazement. "You just stood there and told me how you felt about finally helping all those refugees. I know you care, Hatter. Don't stand there and tell me you don't care about how the battle ends."
He flinched and rubbed nervously at the back of his neck. "I mean, yes, I care about how it all turns out, but…" For some reason, the words got stuck in his throat. He could not make himself say that victory was not worth the cost of her life or even the potential of costing her life. He would rather the Queen of Hearts rule for a thousand years with her glittering iron fist than see Alice die trying to overthrow her.
"But what?" Alice asked quietly, reaching up to pull his face to her. "Hatter?"
He sighed wearily and leaned forward to rest his forehead against her own and breathed in her sweet, feminine scent. "I can't...I don't want you to get hurt," he murmured. Again, trepidation over this new and frightening territory of deep emotion prevented him from being completely forthright.
"I'll be fine," she whispered, as if she understood what he was trying to say.
The nearness of her was intoxicating, and, quite frankly, Hatter did not know how much longer he could control himself. Every fiber of his being was urging him to close the minuscule distance between their lips. His blood pulsed rapidly, echoing the nervous thumping of his heart. He almost imagined each beat of that muscular organ was bidding him in a desperate mantra: Kiss her, kiss her, kiss her…
To his immense shock (but certainly not to any sort of displeasure) Alice was the one to move first. It was the slightest of pressures at first, like a soughing breath of air, when her lips brushed up against his. The kiss was hesitant, unsure, barely hinting at the desperation and yearning it concealed underneath the smooth pinkish-red skin. But, soon enough, the hesitance was overruled, and their lips practically melded together. A dull thud told him she had let the sword tumble to the ground. Her hands loped around his neck while his hands found themselves wounding tightly in her mane of dark silk.
Hatter's stomach practically exploded with fluttery sensations and his heartbeat almost tripled its normal rate. His brain was so stunned at this unexpected turn of events that it took a few moments to fully catch up to reality. He was kissing Alice…kissing which the oyster girl herself had initiated. A thrill of elation ran through him, prompting him to pull the girl flush up against him, and she seemed only too willing to oblige. Every patch of bare skin her fingers touched tingled with sensations of fire and ice mixed together.
"I think your luck is finally changing," he found himself whispering against her lips once they pulled apart from the kiss out of the mutual need for oxygen. He was almost panting, as was she, and he reckoned the world was spinning before his very eyes with Alice at the center of it.
She let out a breathy laugh in response to his softly spoken, but extremely well-placed, comment. The pale skin of her cheeks had flushed in the most becoming way. Those rosy plumes brightened the color of her deep blue eyes, though the irises were slightly smaller than usual as a result of the dilation of her inky black pupils. She was absolutely mesmerizing.
"Wow…I…uh…wow," Alice stammered. "Did that just happen?" Her voice sounded dazed.
"Yeah, I believe it did," Hatter replied, unconsciously running his fingers through her hair. How had he never noticed how wonderful and soft her hair was before? He seemed to not be able to touch it enough.
He frowned at the troubled look which arose in her eyes. Dark doubt assailed him. Was she regretting having kissed him? "What's wrong?" he asked.
"Nothing," she responded quickly; too quickly for him to trust the veracity of that claim. She then sighed and her head dipped slightly. "I mean, it's just…that was amazing…I've never had a kiss like that before." Her voice was colored with awe, but there were disconcerting plaintive undertones to it.
Hatter could not help but smirk with pride at the compliment, though. Ha, take that you fop of a prince! He ran his finger down the side of Alice's cheek, tracing her now faintly swollen lips. "So, what's the problem, then?"
The girl gulped nervously. "Don't you think this is a little fast, Hatter? I mean, good lord, we met yesterday morning and then I wasn't even single," she pointed out.
Whatever hopes had been brought to life by that kiss slowly began to wither and die. He swallowed down the rising tide of pain and rejection. "I'm sorry. I thought…never mind," he mumbled, pulling away from her. He forced his features to display an expression of calm acceptance. She could not be permitted to see how much her rebuff stung him.
He had been about to turn away to walk back the encampment when Alice's hand shot out to grab his arm and tug him back towards her. Reluctantly, he drew his eyes up to meet hers. There was a legion of contrary emotions roiling in her gaze ranging from confusion and fear to affection and bliss. "Please, don't walk away from me," she implored in a meek voice. "I…I'm just not used to feeling so many things at once so…fast. It kind of scares me. But…" She paused in her struggle for words, her bottom lip quivering. "But I can't deny that it's…real. All my instincts are telling me it's genuine, what I feel…for you," she finally admitted. Her hand reached up to softly touch the side of his face. "I only met you yesterday. Logically, I know that, but…at the same time it feels like…"
"A lifetime," Hatter intervened as comprehension of her turmoil finally dawned upon him.
Alice nodded in emphatic agreement.
Hatter sighed and settled his hands to rest upon the soft swell of the girl's hips underneath her slender waist. "Alice, I…we don't have to do anything you don't want to," he assured her. "Frankly, this is all new territory for me, probably newer for me than it is for you. And I'd be lying if I said these…feelings…didn't scare me, too." His hands slid up to cup her face. "But I know what I feel is real even if it is new…and I don't think I want it to go away even if I thought it could." He did realize he was still tiptoeing around the word which expressly verbalized and encompassed everything he felt for her, but this was the best he could conjure up at the moment.
"I don't either," she agreed with a mixture of solemn acceptance and burgeoning anticipation. She glanced away from Hatter for a beat and then returned her gaze. He smiled when she started biting down on her bottom lip. It was such a cute and charming display of nerves. "So, what do we do about this?"
Hatter cocked an eyebrow. "Well, I don't know about you, but I was thoroughly enjoying the snogging," he quipped, grinning wickedly.
She playfully smacked him on the shoulder as if affronted by the riposte. Her eyes danced with mirth, however, which indicated that she was not quite as opposed to the idea as she put on. But then her head cocked to the side and a strange look flashed over her face. "Charlie's looking for us," she announced.
Hatter blinked in bewilderment. "What? How do you know?" he asked. He had not heard the knight calling for them.
Alice merely gestured to her ears with an amused smile on her face. "Supersonic hearing, remember?" she reminded him.
"Oh, right," Hatter said. How could he have forgotten about that? It was probably something he ought to remember if things were to progress between them as he hoped they would.
"It would seem dinner is ready," she informed Hatter. She did not show any sign of moving, though, which seemed to imply it was his choice whether they stayed to continue their previous activities or left to see to other physical needs.
His stomach took the opportunity to gurgle its acute displeasure at having not been seen to all day. He rolled his eyes and groaned as the hunger urge overruled the urge to resume the snogging session.
Alice giggled when her own stomach grumbled. "Come on," she urged laughingly, grabbing his hand and pulling him along down the path.
Charlie did not so much as bat an eye when he glanced up at the two walking towards the fire pit, their hands very clearly linked together. Hatter wondered if the old knight had divined the nature of his and Alice's feelings before even the two of them had realized it. For a man who had lived alone save for a couple of horse companions for over 150 years, he should have been astounded by such foresight. But he had learned earlier how incredibly shrewd the White Knight could be. It was rather uncanny, actually.
"I told you she was around here somewhere, Harbinger," the knight commented wryly.
"Harbinger?" Alice repeated in perplexed amusement as she stacked steaming borogove ribs onto a tin plate.
"Oh, yes, my new title," Hatter explained resignedly. Once she took her seat on a log, he started loading his own plate up with the delicious meat.
"Aw," Alice mock whined. "But I liked 'Vassal'. That had such a lovely ring to it."
Hatter did not bother to dignify that comment with a retort. He had completely given up on hoping that Charlie would ever address him by his real name.
Settling himself beside her on the log, he stole glances at her in between his bites of food. It was probably inappropriate to stare at a woman while she was eating, but he could not help himself. She took quick, small bites, munching slowly as if she were taking care to savor the flavors of the meat. He only tore his eyes from her when Charlie made the announcement that the horses had returned safe and sound.
"You left them at the casino?" Alice inquired incredulously, a piece of borogove held frozen before her mouth.
"Oh, not to worry, My Lady; wherever Archibald and Guinevere are they will know how to return home," Charlie insisted in a nonchalant voice.
"See, we weren't too sure if we would be able to get back out the way we had come in," Hatter explained. He did not add that they had also been uncertain as to whether they would leave the casino at all. "So, we left them untied right outside the wall."
"Oh," Alice said, mollified. "Well, that's nifty." She was quiet for a moment before posing a very serious question. "Do they talk, too?"
"Not that I know of," Charlie answered, stroking his goatee wistfully. "Of course, they may speak only to other horses or other animals. How are we to know of such things?"
Hatter's tight grip on the tin plate nearly broke it in half once the subject of talking animals came up. It only brought to mind the fact that Alice had been visited by one particular talking animal, or, at least something which sported the guise of one. He had not forgotten the issue of the Cheshire's dangerous interest in the girl, which tied his stomach into tight knots of dread.
Alice and Charlie continued discussing talking animals. The old knight even began regaling her with some fanciful tales and legends of sentient critters, though at least none of them were about the Cheshire. They were both oblivious to Hatter's mounting agitation which seemed to mirror his declining appetite. Though his food had only been half consumed, he found it no longer enticed him, and politely asked to be excused.
"Hatter?" Alice questioned in worry as he walked away from the campfire.
The sun had finally gone to rest, but night did not yet prevail. The sky was a dusky mix of violet, blue, and dark pink with a faint array of stars just starting to peak out. There was still light enough that Hatter was able to traverse through the woods with minimal difficulty. He knew Alice was following him. She was making no effort to keep her movements silent as he knew her capable of doing.
"Hatter, stop!" she demanded imperiously. "What's wrong? Was some of that borogove not fully cooked?"
She thought he was ill and had courteously gone off into solitude to vomit up the contents of his stomach. Well, he certainly did feel a sensation of nausea, but he knew it was nothing to do with the food.
"I'm fine," he replied flatly. He lowered himself to sit upon the mossy trunk of a tree which jutted out almost parallel to the ground before curving upwards to climb into the sky.
Alice came up to stand in front of him. She then crouched down to peer up into his eyes, which were trained towards the ground. Even in the dimming light he could see her brow was creased with concern.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"Alice…" he stammered uncomfortably. "It's...I'm really still not keen on you having talks with the Cheshire, all right?" He reached out to stroke that soft hair of hers. "It's not fair," he found himself whispering bleakly.
"Hatter, please stop with the doom and gloom, okay?" Alice asked. "I don't plan on doing any dying. Hell, I'd be breaking the first rule of slaying if I did." She lifted up a hand to cover the one which was running along her dark locks.
"You actually have to have a rule for not dying?" Hatter asked.
She nodded. "Yeah, we do."
In spite of himself, the young man smiled, although there was little humor in it. "No offense, love, but that's not all that encouraging." It was not until the words were already out that he realized he had used a very intimate term of endearment.
Her breath hitched, no doubt in response to what he had called her. But then she waved it away, probably thinking he had not meant to say it. He really had not meant to say it. The sneaky word had just slipped out past his defenses.
"Just trust me, okay?" Alice implored him. "I'm a big girl."
Hatter chortled at that remark. "No, you're not. You're actually quite tiny," he pointed out.
Alice rolled her eyes. "Oh, haha," she said sarcastically. "You know what I mean, you smart-ass."
She stood and then plopped down next to him on the tree trunk with a huge sigh. "I'm really not used to this, at all," she remarked dejectedly.
"Used to what?" Hatter asked.
Her face turned to him, and her eyes ran him up and down. "People worrying about me. That's kind of why I never told my mom about my real job. A lot of Slayers do tell their families, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. And it's not like she's real over-protective, which one would think she would be since losing my dad and me being her only child."
Hatter saw the way her eyes darkened with sorrow at the mention of her mother. He slid his hand over to grasp hers, which was tightly gripping her knee. "You miss her," he said softly.
The girl nodded. "It's been just the two of us for so long. God, she must be freaking out right now," the girl groaned, her hand reaching up to rub at her eyes. "She probably thinks I've been murdered or kidnapped or something."
Hatter's heart clenched in pity for this woman whom he had never met. Yes, she probably was indeed suffering an agony of worry and fear over her daughter's disappearance. And, yet, there was still a selfish voice whispering to him to keep Alice here with him, away from her bloody world of undead foes and rampant apocalyptic battles. It forced him to acknowledge that death was probably not the thing he should fear taking Alice from him. There was also the simple fact that she was from another world, and she had people who loved her and would dearly miss her over there should she stay in Wonderland. But still he recoiled at the thought of her returning home.
Why did this happen? Whose bloody idea was it for me to fall for a girl from the oyster world? I'll bet someone's laughing at me up there, he grumbled to himself.
"What if I get stuck here?" Alice said. She smiled ruefully at Hatter. "Not that it would be so bad, but I don't have a purpose here other than deposing the Queen of Hearts, apparently. But once that's finished, what will I do?"
"I'll take care of you," Hatter avowed sincerely. "I'll make sure you're okay."
She gazed at him with trust and gratitude. "I know you will," she murmured, her face leaning closer to his.
There was no initial hesitance in the kiss this time. Instead there was an aching desperation to it, almost as if they both knew what time they had here together was infinitely precious and they were not to squander it. Their lips practically collided and both of them moaned in relief as their arms wrapped around each other. Alice's leg swung over him and she slid into his lap never once breaking the lip-lock.
Her tongue was like velvet against his lips and he snickered at the fact that it was hers which went probing first. Heat pooled into his belly and, rather more noticeably, southwards. Lust and desire were prompting his hands to roam over her sweet curves which were tantalizingly hidden underneath the thin fabric of that blue dress. His rough fingertips ran over the even thinner fabric of those raspberry leggings. His libido was begging him to trail his path up underneath the hem of the dress, but there was still a modicum of sense hanging on by a slim thread. He was not sure just how far the girl wanted to take things tonight.
But there might not be another chance…you could at least have this one night with her, he thought to himself.
Conscious thought was suspended when Alice's hands wandered up underneath his silk shirt. Gooseflesh abounded where her fingers glided over his naked flesh and it amped up his libido almost tenfold. With a wordless growl, he deepened the kiss, very nearly grazing the back of her throat with his tongue.
Both of them had apparently forgotten they were situated upon the trunk of a tree with nothing for Hatter's back to be braced against. When his hand slid up her legs to cup her firm bottom, the girl's back arched, thrusting her pelvis forward and forcing him to lean back…into thin air. With a thump and dual cries of alarm and dismay, Hatter tumbled backward onto the hard ground and Alice landed on top of him.
"Fuck! Ow!" Hatter swore as a tree root dug into the small of his back, no doubt leaving a lovely imprint of itself.
"Oh my god! Are you okay?" Alice cried, panicked. She leapt off of him, which did ease the pressure in his back somewhat, but he lamented losing the feel of her legs straddling him. Apparently his lusty libido was completely unperturbed by the fall.
He grunted as he sat up, feeling much the same as he had after tumbling into the jabberwock pit. Gratefully accepting Alice's outstretched hand, he was pulled to his feet. She swept his hat up off the ground for him and handed it over.
"Guess we got a bit carried away," he noted breathlessly. His heart was still hammering away and he reckoned every bit of blood it pumped was headed in a southern direction. The extent of his arousal was still quite obvious. Even if Alice could not see how she much she had stimulated him, the girl would have had to have felt it when she had been straddling his lap. Unfortunately, it was too dark for him to make out if her skin was flushed, but he could hear her quick, panting breaths.
Alice snorted. "That is definitely the closest I've ever come to getting it on up against a tree," she remarked wryly.
"That could still be arranged," Hatter remarked with a raised eyebrow and a lascivious smirk. He sidled up to the girl and drew her into his embrace.
"Tempting," the girl replied, tilting her neck up to face him. She let out a frustrated whoosh of air. "But that little interruption reminded me of something very important. We don't have any sort of protection. I mean, considering that I did not make any plans of trans-dimensional travel, I didn't exactly pack my birth control pills, so I haven't taken any today or yesterday. I don't suppose you have any condoms in your pockets, do you?"
"What?" Hatter's features twisted with confusion. "What the hell are condoms? And what do you mean by 'birth control' pills?"
Alice's eyes widened with shock. "You don't have condoms here? What the hell do you use for protection during sex?"
Hatter shrugged. "I think there's some kind of a remedy women take to keep from getting pregnant, but they keep quiet about it."
Alice goggled at him, her mouth dropping open. "That's it?"
"Well, yeah," he said, wondering just what the problem was.
"But," Alice sputtered, clearly very rattled about the issue. "What about STDs?"
"What are those?" Hatter asked.
"Oh, Jesus," Alice muttered. "You're telling me you don't have any sexually-transmitted diseases over here? Illnesses you only get by having unprotected sex with an infected person?"
Hatter shook his head, frowning. "None that I know of. What, you have stuff like that in your world?" Her world was sounding more horrible with each new thing he learned about it. Not only was it apparently crawling with blood-sucking, nearly indestructible creatures, but now it was plagued by illnesses which one could contract simply by taking a tumble in the sack? What kind of madness was that?
"Well, I don't have any," she assured him. "But, yeah, they do exist in my world so we use condoms…well, technically men use condoms…to limit the spread of them. The condom is like a rubber sheath that goes over the penis and it catches the semen so it doesn't come in contact with the guy's partner. It also helps prevent pregnancy." She shook her head in bemused wonderment. "I can't believe you guys don't have those things."
Hatter, for his part, found it quite horrifying any man would put something like that over his member, especially for the act of lovemaking. How could one enjoy any of the sensations of sex with a rubber cover? "Well, that's just bloody stupid. And what was this about pills?" he asked.
"Oh, um, well, I take a pill every day to keep myself from…" She paused with an incredulous sigh, as if she could not believe she was explaining this. "I take a pill that keeps me from releasing eggs so that…well…when I have sex there won't be an egg around for any sperm to fertilize. And please don't tell me the mechanisms of reproduction are different, too, otherwise I think I'll just flip shit."
"No, that's pretty much how it works," Hatter told her.
Alice let out a relieved sigh. "Thank god, but, anyway the pill doesn't protect against STDs, though. And I have to take the pill every day for it to be most effective and, yeah, well, I didn't bring any with me so I've missed two days already."
"So, it's the pregnancy thing you're worried about and not these…STDs," Hatter worked out. He did realize that was probably a sensible thing to be concerned about even if his libido was howling with frustration and disappointment.
"Mainly, yeah," Alice said, nodding her head. "Damn it." It was a small bit of consolation to see that she was just as disappointed at having their mutual desires thwarted by such technicalities as he was.
Hatter glanced up at the now very dark sky lit up only by the blanket of stars and the lone moon. He sighed grimly. "It's just as well, I suppose. We both ought to be getting some sleep."
The trek back to the encampment was subdued. Hatter's body thrummed with the contradicting sensations of unrequited desires, rising fatigue, blissful contentment, and a gnawing sense of trepidation. His hand was once more entwined with Alice's, an unspoken symbol of the change in their relationship. Was there even a relationship? There was definitely something. But things were so jumbled and unpredictable right now. One or both of them might end up forfeiting their lives in the impending fight against the Queen of Hearts. Even if they both lived through the battle there was still the matter of Alice being an oyster who hailed from a completely different world. If Hatter had a lick of sense left to him, he would cut things off now so as to lessen the pain of a separation he viewed as all but inevitable.
But it was too late. His heart was already lost, completely and irrevocably swept up into that petite girl's unusually strong hands. There was no turning back the clock. As Alice had told him, fate had dealt him his cards. He did not have it in him to regret these past two days with this beguiling little oyster girl. The young man had felt more alive during his time with Alice than for most of his life.
Charlie was absent when they reached the dim, smoldering remains of the campfire. He was not in his hammock either which meant he was either off seeing to some personal needs or was caring for the horses. Hatter's tin plate of half-eaten borogove still sat upon the ground where he had left it next to the tin cup of water.
"Hatter?" Alice ventured in an uncharacteristically shy voice.
"Yeah?"
Biting on her bottom lip, the girl turned her hopeful gaze up to him. "Will you…stay with me tonight?" There was a strange vulnerability to her at that moment. It was a rare glimpse into the young woman who hid beneath the armor of preternatural strength and willful stubbornness.
He grinned, reaching down to cup her delicate chin. "If I must," he replied, pretending it was a grave chore she was asking of him. Although the thought of sleeping next to her and not being able to entertain any of the more naughty inclinations which ran through his mind sounded like it could be quite the torment.
Hatter followed her into the barn, quietly easing the wooden gate shut behind him. He shrugged off his brown leather jacket and folded it up atop the velvet coat which Alice had set upon a stack of wooden crates. He debated over whether or not to remove his silk paisley-patterned shirt, but then thought better of it. If they could not have sex, it was probably best they kept as much clothes on as possible to resist the temptation. Once he kicked his shoes off and set them beside Alice's scuffed up purple boots, he pulled the quilt back to climb onto the straw-filled mattress. He curled on his side, facing Alice, who smiled serenely back at him, reaching out to clasp his hand in her own. Almost as soon as his head sank into the pillow he felt his limbs and eyelids grow heavy.
"Thank you," the girl sleepily murmured.
"For what?" he asked, his voice sounding equally drowsy.
She let out a soft snort. "Why is it every time you do something heroic and I thank you for it you never seem to realize what it is I'm thanking you for?" Snuggling closer to him, she clarified her gratitude. "Thank you for coming to rescue me."
A giddy sensation of warmth draped over the lethargy taking hold of his body. He leaned forward to bestow a tender kiss on her forehead before declaring in a whispered voice, "I'll always come for you, Alice."
His chin nuzzled up against the crown of her head. "Always," he repeated before drifting off into sleep's waiting embrace.
Haha, I'm such a tease, aren't I? My Alice may be different than the original, but she's still way too sensible to not think about such things like protection and birth control. Hope you enjoyed the bits of fluff and...playing...hehe...
Reviews are lovely little gifts so please tell me what you thought! We're almost to 100 reviews anyway!