2: In Memory Of…

Blackarachnia sobbed miserably and painfully in her bed. "He's gone…he's gone," she cried, oblivious of the voices outside her door. She was half-unconscious from exhaustion, and half asleep, but she was still crying. In this half-conscious state, Blackarachnia was dreaming.

There they were, she and Silverbolt. Her dear love, Silverbolt. Then it all happened so quickly that it was a blur. Rocks falling, yells, flying through the air, then being knocked down again. She saw herself digging through the rocks, and then trying desperately to contact Optimus. Help! She needed help. Where was Silverbolt? She heard his internal computer, muffled somewhere beneath the rocks, saying: "Stasis lock must commence. Self repair circuitry damaged. Stasis lock must commence. Not commencing may result in loss of spark."

Blackarachnia was digging frantically; she had to find him! It was indescribably horrible, that she could hear his computer but she couldn't find him. She started screaming for him. Even now she mouthed the words. Silverbolt, I'm here! I can't find you! Answer me! I can't find you! What do I do? Help me! Silverbolt! Can't you hear me? Where are you?! And all the time that awful computer was voice going: "Stasis lock circuitry severely damaged. Emergency repair circuitry offline. Spark loss inevitable."

No! No! Not Silverbolt. Blackarachnia dug through the rocks, so desperate and even physically in pain. Then she found him beneath the rock. She screamed, too upset to move. That was not Silverbolt! That dead, contorted thing. Her love! She saw Silverbolt's spark rising from his dead body, rising into the cliffs above. He couldn't be gone. He couldn't leave her.

"No!" Blackarachnia sat up in bed, hot tears streaming down her face. She sobbed and cried piteously, in the realization that her worst nightmare was true in waking life. How could this be? She cried out, no words in particular, just a miserable shout of nothingness choked with tears. And she didn't care who knew. She didn't care. Couldn't care.

Dizzy and blinded with tears, Blackarachnia opened the door to her quarters and walked out into the hall. She saw nothing and felt nothing. Not till she was half-way down the hall and she realized why she had gotten out of bed. They were having a ceremony about Silverbolt, and she was late. Struggling to look normal, biting back tears, she straightened up and walked down the hallway.

When she saw all the maximals in the main room, gathered with sad faces, it made her want to go back in her room and hide from the world. But she had to be brave, for Silverbolt. Optimus was just finishing his speech.

"…and was surely the noblest maximal I have ever met. It seems infinitely unfair to lose him, but we will get through it together. He would want us to hold together." Optimus gave Blackarachnia a hello smile, but she returned it with the most heartbroken look he had ever seen. "Now," Optimus continued, somewhat disturbed, "let's all say something that we loved about him. Some memory that each of us will cherish in our sparks. I, for one, appreciated his spirit of teamwork and honor; he seldom did anything harmful to of us, in speech or in act, and when he did he was always quick with regret and humble apologies. He was the knight in shining armor and a role model for all of us."

Rhinox spoke up next. "That fuzore was always there to lend me a helping hand. He helped me with monitor duty and kept me cheery when I was always at the computers. He would come in from a scout mission and describe the rocks, fields, and trees he had flown over. It kept me going."

Cheetor smiled faintly. "He was a pain sometimes. I didn't understand him at first. Why did everybody like him so much? Why were they so kind to him? Then I realized it was because he was kind to them first. He was nice to me too, even when…even when he knew I was wrong about stuff. We used to have races in our spare time, see who could fly faster. It's gonna be boring without him."

Every one looked at Depth Charge, waiting for him to speak. Depth Charge remained silent. Optimus shot him a ferocious glance that looked like a death threat. "He was determined," Depth Charge said gruffly. "You can't get far without determination."

Rattrap seemed to be struggling. "I—I—well, uh, he was just cool. There's so much to say about him. He was annoying but, I liked be'n around him. 'Silverbolt,' I'd say, 'I like be'n around ya.'"

Blackarachnia made a strange sound. She was stifling a sob as she burst into tears again. She had made it fine until they mentioned his name. Until Rattrap said Silverbolt.

"Blackarachnia, is there something you want to say about Silverbolt?" Optimus asked in a kind voice.

"I—I—" She broke off into miserable sobs again. She couldn't handle it. It was too much. She couldn't talk about him. "He was—Silverbolt—oh Silverbolt!" She couldn't speak at all.

"There, there," Cheetor soothed, putting his arm around her. She relaxed a little. "That's right. We're here. See? It's not so bad."

Blackarachnia grew furious. "YES IT IS BAD!" she screamed, hitting him in the gut with her elbow. "You'll never understand! I can't do it!" Blackarachnia took a last look at the maximals' shocked faces and darted out of the base.

"Blackarachnia, wait!" Optimus shouted.

"What's her problem?" Depth Charge muttered.

"Was it somethin' I said?" Rattrap asked guiltily.

"No, it was somethin' I said," Cheetor answered, and ran out of the room.